Carla Turned On

Why Dating Sucks for You (And Why It Keeps Happening)

23 min · 26. maj 2026
episode Why Dating Sucks for You (And Why It Keeps Happening) cover

Description

Why does dating feel so exhausting—even when you're doing "everything right"? In this episode, Carla Romo breaks down the emotional rollercoaster of modern dating and hookup culture, and why so many people feel stuck in a cycle of hope and disappointment. She explains how over-investing, ignoring patterns, and chasing potential can lead to burnout—and what to do instead. Carla shares how to date with confidence, boundaries, and authenticity, while staying grounded and protecting your emotional health. If you're tired of feeling replaceable or confused in dating, this episode will help you reset and approach dating in a healthier, more intentional way. What You'll Learn * Dating exhaustion often comes from repeated disappointment, not dating itself * Pay attention to patterns—not just someone's potential * Inconsistency is a major red flag * Managing expectations helps protect your emotional health * Confidence comes from showing up authentically * Intentional dating leads to more fulfilling connections Work with me: 1:1 Coaching program [https://carlaromo.com/coaching-options/] Ask Me Anything - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingama/] Dating Profile Makeover - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingprofile/] Proven Dating Courses: Swipe Match Spark: The Ultimate Dating App Guide [https://carlaromo.com/swipe-match-spark-course/] No Filter: The Sex Guide Every Dater Needs [https://carlaromo.com/no-filter-guide-landing/] Book: Contagious Love: Break Free From Codependency for Damn Good [https://www.amazon.com/dp/1689772239] Tiktok: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.tiktok.com/@iamcarlaromo?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc] Instagram: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.instagram.com/iamcarlaromo] Youtube: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.youtube.com/c/CarlaRomo] FREEBIE: 20 Best First and Second Date Questions [https://carlaromo.myflodesk.com/20best] Rate, Review, & Follow, Carla Turned On Sound Bites * "Go into dating with zero expectations" * "Pay attention to patterns, not just potential" * "Don't invest in inconsistency" Chapters 02:30 – You're not tired of dating—you're tired of being disappointed 15:16 – Hook-Up Culture Is Making You Feel Replaceable Disclaimer: Carla Turned On content has been made available for informational, entertainment, and educational purposes only. Carla Turned On is distinctly different from coaching, counseling, psychotherapy, or psychoanalysis and does not deal with the diagnosis or treatment of emotional problems. Carla Turned On does not constitute medical consultation or treatment.

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All episodes

33 episodes

episode Why You Keep Going Back to Your Ex (Even When It's Not Right) artwork

Why You Keep Going Back to Your Ex (Even When It's Not Right)

Thinking about going back to your ex… or already did? In this episode, Carla Romo breaks down the real reasons you feel pulled back toward an ex—and why it's often more about loneliness, familiarity, and emotional triggers than actual compatibility. She challenges the idea of "what could be" and explains why change—not chemistry—is what determines if something can truly work again. Carla also dives into the truth about sex with an ex, why it can feel comforting but keep you emotionally stuck, and how to decide what's actually best for your growth and future relationships. What You'll Learn * Missing your ex doesn't always mean you should go back * Familiarity can feel like love—but it's not the same as compatibility * Real change is required for a relationship to work again * Sex with an ex can delay healing and keep you stuck * Emotional triggers often drive the desire to reconnect * Self-awareness helps you make better relationship decisions Work with me: 1:1 Coaching program [https://carlaromo.com/coaching-options/] Ask Me Anything - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingama/] Dating Profile Makeover - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingprofile/] Proven Dating Courses: Swipe Match Spark: The Ultimate Dating App Guide [https://carlaromo.com/swipe-match-spark-course/] No Filter: The Sex Guide Every Dater Needs [https://carlaromo.com/no-filter-guide-landing/] Book: Contagious Love: Break Free From Codependency for Damn Good [https://www.amazon.com/dp/1689772239] Tiktok: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.tiktok.com/@iamcarlaromo?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc] Instagram: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.instagram.com/iamcarlaromo] Youtube: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.youtube.com/c/CarlaRomo] FREEBIE: 20 Best First and Second Date Questions [https://carlaromo.myflodesk.com/20best] Rate, Review, & Follow, Carla Turned On Sound Bites * "Don't fall in love with potential" * "Compatibility trumps everything" * "Sex with your ex keeps you stuck" Chapters 01:48 – Should You Get Back With Your Ex… or Are You Just Lonely? 14:55 – Sex With Your Ex: Connection… or Comfort? Disclaimer: Carla Turned On content has been made available for informational, entertainment, and educational purposes only. Carla Turned On is distinctly different from coaching, counseling, psychotherapy, or psychoanalysis and does not deal with the diagnosis or treatment of emotional problems. Carla Turned On does not constitute medical consultation or treatment.

23. juni 202619 min
episode Why You Keep Falling for Mixed Signals artwork

Why You Keep Falling for Mixed Signals

If you feel confused in dating… you're probably ignoring the answer. In this episode, Carla Romo breaks down the truth about mixed signals, why they're not actually confusing, and how inconsistency always reveals someone's true intentions. She challenges the habit of overanalyzing and explains why patterns—not moments—tell you everything you need to know. Carla also dives into sexual expectations and communication, helping you understand the narratives you might be creating and how to advocate for your needs with clarity and confidence. If you're tired of second-guessing and settling for less, this episode will help you see things clearly. What You'll Learn * Mixed signals = inconsistent behavior, not confusion * Patterns reveal truth—stop focusing on isolated moments * Overthinking keeps you stuck in unhealthy cycles * Your needs matter—don't settle for breadcrumbs * Their reactions give you clarity * Clear communication is essential for sexual alignment Work with me: 1:1 Coaching program [https://carlaromo.com/coaching-options/] Ask Me Anything - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingama/] Dating Profile Makeover - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingprofile/] Proven Dating Courses: Swipe Match Spark: The Ultimate Dating App Guide [https://carlaromo.com/swipe-match-spark-course/] No Filter: The Sex Guide Every Dater Needs [https://carlaromo.com/no-filter-guide-landing/] Book: Contagious Love: Break Free From Codependency for Damn Good [https://www.amazon.com/dp/1689772239] Tiktok: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.tiktok.com/@iamcarlaromo?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc] Instagram: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.instagram.com/iamcarlaromo] Youtube: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.youtube.com/c/CarlaRomo] FREEBIE: 20 Best First and Second Date Questions [https://carlaromo.myflodesk.com/20best] Rate, Review, & Follow, Carla Turned On Sound Bites * "You want the whole fucking muffin." * "Watch patterns, not the moments." * "Their reaction is clarity." Chapters 02:06 – Mixed Signals Are NOT Confusing—You're Just Ignoring the Truth 15:32 – Sexual Expectations: What Narrative Are You Telling Yourself? Disclaimer: Carla Turned On content has been made available for informational, entertainment, and educational purposes only. Carla Turned On is distinctly different from coaching, counseling, psychotherapy, or psychoanalysis and does not deal with the diagnosis or treatment of emotional problems. Carla Turned On does not constitute medical consultation or treatment.

16. juni 202620 min
episode Where You Mess It Up On Dates 2 & 3 (And How To Get Date 4) artwork

Where You Mess It Up On Dates 2 & 3 (And How To Get Date 4)

So you made it past the first date… now what? In this episode, Carla Romo breaks down how to maintain momentum after the first date and avoid the subtle mistakes that cause things to fizzle out. She shares how to deepen emotional connection, stay consistent, and build trust without rushing or forcing the relationship. Carla also dives into pacing intimacy, explaining how to navigate physical connection without making things awkward or losing alignment. If you've ever had something start strong and then suddenly fall off, this episode will show you what's really going on—and how to fix it. What You'll Learn * Momentum is built through consistency, not intensity * Go deeper emotionally without overwhelming your date * Let connection grow naturally—don't force it * Stay curious without becoming overly attached * Communication between dates matters more than you think * Pacing intimacy helps build trust and long-term connection Work with me: 1:1 Coaching program [https://carlaromo.com/coaching-options/] Ask Me Anything - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingama/] Dating Profile Makeover - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingprofile/] Proven Dating Courses: Swipe Match Spark: The Ultimate Dating App Guide [https://carlaromo.com/swipe-match-spark-course/] No Filter: The Sex Guide Every Dater Needs [https://carlaromo.com/no-filter-guide-landing/] Book: Contagious Love: Break Free From Codependency for Damn Good [https://www.amazon.com/dp/1689772239] Tiktok: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.tiktok.com/@iamcarlaromo?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc] Instagram: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.instagram.com/iamcarlaromo] Youtube: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.youtube.com/c/CarlaRomo] FREEBIE: 20 Best First and Second Date Questions [https://carlaromo.myflodesk.com/20best] Rate, Review, & Follow, Carla Turned On Sound Bites * "Be consistent in your communication" * "Let things progress naturally" * "Stay curious but not attached" Chapters 02:00 – You Got the First Date… Now Don't Screw Up Dates 2 & 3 16:35 – When Intimacy Starts Coming Up… How to Handle Pacing Without It Getting Weird Disclaimer: Carla Turned On content has been made available for informational, entertainment, and educational purposes only. Carla Turned On is distinctly different from coaching, counseling, psychotherapy, or psychoanalysis and does not deal with the diagnosis or treatment of emotional problems. Carla Turned On does not constitute medical consultation or treatment.

9. juni 202620 min
episode You're Making These First Date Mistakes artwork

You're Making These First Date Mistakes

First dates feel awkward, stressful, and sometimes straight-up exhausting—but it's not because you're bad at dating. In this episode, Carla Romo breaks down the biggest first date mistakes that quietly sabotage connection—from trying too hard to impress to turning dates into interviews. She shares how to shift into authenticity, curiosity, and presence so you can actually enjoy the experience and build real chemistry. Carla also dives into body language, connection, and physical intimacy, including how to navigate the question everyone wonders: should you kiss on the first date? This episode will help you show up more confidently, read the vibe, and create a date that actually feels good. What You'll Learn * Awkwardness is normal—don't overthink it * Focus on curiosity, not impressing your date * Don't turn the date into an interview * Avoid oversharing or trauma dumping * Check in with yourself during the date * Consent and comfort matter for physical connection Work with me: 1:1 Coaching program [https://carlaromo.com/coaching-options/] Ask Me Anything - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingama/] Dating Profile Makeover - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingprofile/] Proven Dating Courses: Swipe Match Spark: The Ultimate Dating App Guide [https://carlaromo.com/swipe-match-spark-course/] No Filter: The Sex Guide Every Dater Needs [https://carlaromo.com/no-filter-guide-landing/] Book: Contagious Love: Break Free From Codependency for Damn Good [https://www.amazon.com/dp/1689772239] Tiktok: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.tiktok.com/@iamcarlaromo?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc] Instagram: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.instagram.com/iamcarlaromo] Youtube: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.youtube.com/c/CarlaRomo] FREEBIE: 20 Best First and Second Date Questions [https://carlaromo.myflodesk.com/20best] Rate, Review, & Follow, Carla Turned On Sound Bites * "First dates are fucking hard." * "Be you. You are enough." * "Consent is sexy." Chapters 02:37 – You're Not Bad at Dating—You're Just Making These First Date Mistakes 16:59 – Should You Kiss on the First Date? Disclaimer: Carla Turned On content has been made available for informational, entertainment, and educational purposes only. Carla Turned On is distinctly different from coaching, counseling, psychotherapy, or psychoanalysis and does not deal with the diagnosis or treatment of emotional problems. Carla Turned On does not constitute medical consultation or treatment.

2. juni 202620 min
episode Why Dating Sucks for You (And Why It Keeps Happening) artwork

Why Dating Sucks for You (And Why It Keeps Happening)

Why does dating feel so exhausting—even when you're doing "everything right"? In this episode, Carla Romo breaks down the emotional rollercoaster of modern dating and hookup culture, and why so many people feel stuck in a cycle of hope and disappointment. She explains how over-investing, ignoring patterns, and chasing potential can lead to burnout—and what to do instead. Carla shares how to date with confidence, boundaries, and authenticity, while staying grounded and protecting your emotional health. If you're tired of feeling replaceable or confused in dating, this episode will help you reset and approach dating in a healthier, more intentional way. What You'll Learn * Dating exhaustion often comes from repeated disappointment, not dating itself * Pay attention to patterns—not just someone's potential * Inconsistency is a major red flag * Managing expectations helps protect your emotional health * Confidence comes from showing up authentically * Intentional dating leads to more fulfilling connections Work with me: 1:1 Coaching program [https://carlaromo.com/coaching-options/] Ask Me Anything - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingama/] Dating Profile Makeover - 30 Min Session [https://carlaromo.com/coachingprofile/] Proven Dating Courses: Swipe Match Spark: The Ultimate Dating App Guide [https://carlaromo.com/swipe-match-spark-course/] No Filter: The Sex Guide Every Dater Needs [https://carlaromo.com/no-filter-guide-landing/] Book: Contagious Love: Break Free From Codependency for Damn Good [https://www.amazon.com/dp/1689772239] Tiktok: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.tiktok.com/@iamcarlaromo?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc] Instagram: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.instagram.com/iamcarlaromo] Youtube: @iamcarlaromo [https://www.youtube.com/c/CarlaRomo] FREEBIE: 20 Best First and Second Date Questions [https://carlaromo.myflodesk.com/20best] Rate, Review, & Follow, Carla Turned On Sound Bites * "Go into dating with zero expectations" * "Pay attention to patterns, not just potential" * "Don't invest in inconsistency" Chapters 02:30 – You're not tired of dating—you're tired of being disappointed 15:16 – Hook-Up Culture Is Making You Feel Replaceable Disclaimer: Carla Turned On content has been made available for informational, entertainment, and educational purposes only. Carla Turned On is distinctly different from coaching, counseling, psychotherapy, or psychoanalysis and does not deal with the diagnosis or treatment of emotional problems. Carla Turned On does not constitute medical consultation or treatment.

26. maj 202623 min