170: "What Changes When You Start Leading Leaders?" ft. Alli Murphy

170: "What Changes When You Start Leading Leaders?" ft. Alli Murphy

Erik and Alli compare notes on what goes wrong when high-performing leaders move from managing individual contributors to leading leaders. They highlight recurring gaps, including losing ground-level visibility, suddenly being expected to influence strategy at higher levels, and struggling to develop and communicate effectively with the leaders beneath you. 🧭 Conversation Highlights * The IC to people-manager transition often isn’t taught, so the “leader of leaders” shift compounds the learning-by-trial-and-error problem. * A common trap is staying in the weeds and trying to personally verify what’s happening below, rather than building systems to keep you connected without micromanaging. * New leadership layers add boardroom dynamics: you’re expected to influence peers and strategy, not just execute plans handed to you. * When people are promoted over peers, they can develop a “prove I earned this” posture and also face more incomplete-information and uncertainty. 💡 Key Takeaways * Leaders of leaders need leverage, not more hands-on work: the goal is to stay informed via systems and influence rather than re-owning problems. * Strategy competence becomes an operational skill. You need time to understand what senior leadership cares about so you can connect that to execution. * Communication and development channels often break when you lose direct visibility. You need a clearer framework for discussing performance and coaching needs with the leaders under you. * Delegation and coaching are the foundational multiplier. If you get it right at the IC level, you can teach it downward through your leadership layer. ❓ Questions That Mattered * What common gaps show up when people move from leading ICs to leading leaders without being supported through the transition? * How should new leaders adjust when they no longer have ground-level visibility but are still accountable for outcomes? * What changes when you enter boardroom and peer-influence dynamics rather than only executing strategy? * Which single competency would you bet on for someone preparing for the “uncharted water” of leading leaders? 🗣️ Notable Quotes * “their job is not therapist.” * “Sometimes there isn't one.” * “learn how to delegate well and actually coach people.” * “that game of incomplete information is often new when you move into this lead leaders role” 🔗 Links & Resources * Listen To Other Episodes Co-Hosted With Alli [https://www.google.com/url?q=https://podcast.languageofleadership.io/categories/leadership-talks-with-alli-murphy/&sa=D&source=editors&ust=1778773895720838&usg=AOvVaw00t9nGBdaX0Q1OFNSxU61u]

169: "Are We Really Preparing Like it Matters?" (reflections on Scott Anderson)

🧠 Erik’s Take Erik reflects on his conversation with Scott Anderson as a rare opportunity to learn from someone who has led where most people will never go—combat zones, humanitarian crises, and high-stakes environments where failure has real consequences. What stands out most isn’t just Scott’s experience—it’s the contrast. The gap between how leadership must operate in those environments versus how casually it’s often approached in business. Erik leans into that tension. If we claim the stakes are high in our work, why don’t we prepare like they are? 🎯 Top Insights from the Interview * Preparation scales with consequences. In the military and UN, missions often require 30–50% of total time spent in preparation. In business, it’s often close to zero.  * The range of “unknowns” defines the environment. In conflict zones, unpredictability is extreme—routes disappear, environments change instantly. In business, most risks are slower and more visible.  * You don’t get better without exposure. Leaders improve through reps—either real-world experience or structured simulation. There’s no shortcut.  * Mentorship accelerates everything. Watching how great leaders think—not just what they do—is one of the fastest ways to grow.  * Business leadership under-trains for reality. There’s a disconnect between perceived stakes and actual preparation in corporate environments.  🧩 The Personal Layer This episode hits a familiar nerve for Erik. He’s spent his career in environments where performance matters—but this conversation forces a deeper question: Are we actually preparing like it matters? There’s a quiet tension underneath his reflection: *  We say things are important  *  We feel pressure to perform  *  But we rarely build the systems to truly practice  And that gap is where performance breaks down. Scott’s experience becomes a mirror—highlighting how much of modern leadership is reactive instead of trained. 🧰 From Insight to Action * Audit your preparation habits. Before your next “important” meeting, ask: Did I actually prepare—or just show up? * Create practice environments. Don’t wait for real stakes. Simulate them. Role play, rehearse, pressure test.  * Expose your team to your thinking. Don’t just show outcomes—walk people through how you arrived there.  * Invest in reps, not just knowledge. Reading and learning isn’t enough. Build muscle memory through doing.  * Redefine what “high stakes” means for you. If it matters—treat it like it matters.  🗣️ Notable Quotes “The higher the stakes, the more time you spend preparing.” “In business, we say the stakes are high—but we don’t prepare like they are.” “You get better through exposure—either by doing it or by watching someone who has.” “The range of what can go wrong in a conflict zone is almost unimaginable.” “We don’t train leaders—we just expect them to perform.” 🔗 Links & Resources * Listen to Scott Anderson's Episode [https://podcast.languageofleadership.io/164-what-does-leadership-look-like-when-lives-are-actually-on-the-line]

168: "Building Culture That's Actually Lived, Not Just Talked About" (reflections on JD Hilzendager)

🧠 Erik’s Take Erik reflects on his conversation with JD Hilzendager as a study in intentional culture, unconventional thinking, and problem-first leadership. What stands out most isn’t just what JD has built—but how he thinks about building it. This episode is less about tactics and more about mental models: how culture is formed, how individuals decide to break away from the norm, and how great organizations create value by relentlessly solving problems.  🎯 Top Insights from the Interview * Culture is language, not perks. It’s the phrases, questions, and behaviors that become so normal they’re unconscious  * Different thinking creates different outcomes. If you want different results, you can’t follow the same playbook as everyone else  * Problem-solving is the real job. The best organizations don’t just execute—they continuously identify and solve “stupid things”  * Technology adoption is a cultural challenge. Tools only work if people feel safe using them and evolving their roles  * Great companies create roles, not just fill them. When work changes, the best leaders redefine value—not eliminate people  🧩 The Personal Layer Erik connects deeply with JD’s mindset around not fitting inside traditional corporate structures. There’s a shared recognition that some people are wired to question, push, and rethink systems—not just operate within them. He highlights the tension many professionals feel: * Do I follow the path that’s proven and stable?  * Or do I pursue something that aligns with how I naturally think?  There’s also a deeper appreciation for how culture isn’t accidental—it’s built slowly, intentionally, and often invisibly over years. 🧰 From Insight to Action * Audit your culture through language. What phrases are “normal” in your team? What does that reveal?  * Challenge default thinking. If you’re getting average results, ask: where am I just doing what everyone else does?  * Find one “stupid thing” each week. Identify inefficiencies or broken processes—and take ownership of solving them  * Reframe your role around value creation. Don’t cling to tasks—focus on problems you’re uniquely positioned to solve  * Make change feel safe. When introducing new tools or ideas, show people where they fit—not where they’re replaced  🗣️ Notable Quotes * “Culture is what’s normal to the tongue.”  * “If you’re doing what everyone else is doing, you’re going to get the same results.”  * “Find one stupid thing each week.”  * “Your job is to find problems and solve them.”  * “Great companies don’t just adopt technology—they adapt their people.”  🔗 Links & Resources * Listen to JD Hilzendager's Episode [https://podcast.languageofleadership.io/161-jd-hilzendager-building-a-business-is-more-about-how-you-think-than-what-you-think]

167: Scott Anderson: "What Does Leadership Look Like When Lives Are Actually on the Line?"

In this long-awaited conversation, Erik sits down with Scott Anderson, who has served over 20 years in the military and is now a well-established leader in corporate America. Scott brings a rare blend of crisis-tested leadership and operational discipline into the business world.  👤 About the Guest Scott Anderson is a seasoned leader with over 20 years of experience across the U.S. Army, United Nations, and federal agencies. He led humanitarian and security operations in Gaza and Afghanistan, managed teams of up to 14,000 people in high-risk environments and oversaw billion-dollar operations under extreme uncertainty Now, he serves as COO of a growing property management company. 🧭 Conversation Highlights 1. Leadership Changes When the Stakes Are Real. When decisions can cost lives, leadership stops being abstract. You don’t get to hide behind theory—you have to own outcomes, fully. 2. Slow Down to Make Better Decisions. In chaos, the instinct is to speed up. Great leaders do the opposite—they slow down just enough to filter signal from noise. 3. Authenticity Beats False Reassurance. You can’t promise safety in a war zone. But you can be honest. Trust is built through truth, not comfort. 4. Resolve Is the Hidden Differentiator. Great leaders aren’t just smart or charismatic—they finish what they start. They commit, decide, and follow through. 5. Preparation Scales with Risk. In high-stakes environments, up to 50% of time is spent preparing. In business? Almost none. That gap matters. 💡 Key Takeaways * Leadership is most visible—and most tested—when outcomes matter most  * Calm is not personality—it’s a trained, practiced skill  * Clarity comes from filtering out irrelevant noise, not gathering more data  * Teams lose confidence fast when leaders hesitate or waffle  * Preparation isn’t optional—it’s the foundation of performance  * You don’t need all the answers—but you do need the right questions  * Culture is built through consistency, not intention  ❓ Questions That Mattered * What actually changes when leadership decisions can cost lives?  * How do you train yourself to stay calm under extreme pressure?  * What separates leaders who follow through from those who don’t?  * How do you prepare for situations you can’t predict?  * What does corporate leadership get wrong about preparation?  * How do you know what you really know vs. what you assume?  * What role does honesty play when certainty isn’t possible?  🗣️ Notable Quotes “There are a lot of things that aren’t your fault—but are still your responsibility.” “You can’t lie to people. You can’t tell them they’re safe when they’re not.” “When the stakes are high, you have to slow things down—not speed them up.” “Great leaders have resolve. They start something—and they finish it.” “You don’t think about the Super Bowl. You think about the play.” “We all think we know—but you have to be open to the idea that you don’t.” 🔗 Links & Resources * Check out RPM Express' Website: expressrpm.com [https://expressrpm.com/] * Follow Scott on LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/scottanderson1967/]

166: JD Hilzendager: "Building a Business is More About How You Think Than What You Think"

This conversation with JD Hilzendager, COO of ViaOne, is a masterclass in how to think, not what to think when it comes to building businesses. JD breaks down how his team evaluates opportunities across industries, why culture is their true operating system, and how empowering people to challenge decisions leads to better outcomes. From saying “no” to AT&T deals to building companies around passionate operators, this episode explores the intersection of decision-making, culture design, and long-term thinking—all grounded in real-world execution.  👤 About the Guest JD Hilzendager is the COO of ViaOne Services, a private equity-backed organization operating across telecom, healthcare, and multiple verticals. He’s spent over a decade building a system that allows teams to launch, acquire, and scale companies by pairing strong operators with world-class infrastructure and culture.  🧭 Conversation Highlights Building Businesses Without Industry Experience * The “beach ball” analogy: the product doesn’t matter—systems and people do * Focus on core business functions (marketing, ops, finance) over niche expertise  * Pair passionate operators with a strong internal machine  Opportunity Selection & Decision-Making * "Just start” → action creates data, and data informs direction  * Avoid falling in love with the product—stay loyal to outcomes, not ideas * Think in 5–10 year horizons, not short-term wins  The Power of Saying No * Turned down AT&T multiple times due to execution risk  * Refused to let sunk cost drive decisions  * Built a culture where anyone can stop a deal Culture as a System, Not a Slogan * Culture = “common tongue” for how the company operates  * Grounded in frameworks like The 7 Habits and The Four Agreements * Reinforced consistently over years—not a one-time initiative  Team Design & Human Dynamics * Uses tools like Culture Index to map personalities and roles  * Avoids stacking similar personalities (“you can’t have multiple pistons”)  * Designs teams intentionally for complementary strengths 💡 Key Takeaways * Execution confidence > opportunity excitement * The best deals are the ones you can actually deliver on * Culture is built through repetition, not intention * Great teams are engineered, not assembled * Empowered people create better decisions than top-down control ❓ Questions That Mattered *  How do you evaluate an opportunity in an industry you don’t understand?  *  What allows a company to confidently say “no” to massive deals?  *  How do you build a culture where people challenge decisions safely?  *  What’s the balance between speed and diligence in decision-making?  *  How do you design teams that don’t implode under pressure?  🗣️ Notable Quotes *  “It doesn’t matter what the widget is—it matters if you have the right people.”  *  “You don’t have to do the deal.”  *  “I’d rather do no deal than a deal I can’t execute.”  *  “Try to be the dumbest guy in the room.”  *  “You can’t have two people who both want to be pistons.”  *  “Culture is the common tongue of how we operate.”  🔗 Links & Resources * Check out ViaOne Services' Website: viaoneservices.com [https://viaoneservices.com/] * Follow JD on LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jdhilzendager/]