Okay, But Why?

Okay, But Why Did We Make This Podcast? (And What's Next??)

Ever since last year’s election, suburban women have had more questions than answers. How are we supposed to deal with the firehose of information that’s coming at us all the time? Can we believe what we read in the news or on social media? And, most important of all, why is all of this happening? That’s why we made “Okay, But Why.” Because these days, good information can be hard to find. And no matter what anyone says, facts are not political. If Americans all had access to the same information, we’d probably agree on a lot more than we think. These resources aren’t going anywhere – you can still scroll back in your podcast feed [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/red-wine-blue/id1565897152] to listen to old episodes, watch them on YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLEZUaW-TwVdgTDS1cvb22pfO2y-II6rze], or read about them on our website [https://redwine.blue/okay-but-why/]. You can send an episode to a friend and use it as a starting point for a meaningful conversation. Now that we all have a little better handle on why the news is so crazy, there’s another pressing question to answer: how can we make a difference without losing our shit? So in that spirit, we’re launching a brand-new pod that’s simply called “How To Not Lose Your Sh!t.” It’ll be hosted by Katie Paris, the founder of Red Wine & Blue, along with LaFonda Cousin, our Chief People Officer, yoga teacher, and wellness expert. Because let’s be honest, we’re all kind of losing our shit right now. But there are ways to feel better — and ways to make the world a better place — and it all starts with community. The trailer for our new pod will drop tomorrow and the first episode (with special guest Heather Cox Richardson) will come out on Wednesday, October 1st. If you’re already subscribed to the Red Wine & Blue podcast, you don’t need to do anything! New episodes will already be in your podcast player every Wednesday. And if you’re not already subscribed, you can find us by searching for “How To Not Lose Your Sh!t” in your podcast feed. We can’t wait to figure out how we can all make a difference without losing our shit… together.

Okay, But Why Should You Vote For Attorney General?

Americans don’t talk about state attorney generals very much. Technically it’s “attorneys general”—like “sisters-in-law” instead of “sister-in-laws”—but don’t get hung up on the wording. It’s what AGs actually do that matters so much. A state attorney general is basically the top legal expert in their state; they’re also known as The People’s Lawyers because they fight for us, their constituents, against bad actors who don’t have our best interests in mind. That can mean prosecuting companies that are polluting waterways or landlords who are illegally raising rent prices or banks that are selling people’s private data.  Sometimes state AGs band together on lawsuits, like a recent case against Purdue Pharma for aggressively pushing medications like OxyContin and contributing to the opioid crisis we’re facing in this country. The company settled for $7.4 billion dollars just this past January, which means billions of dollars that can now be put back into treatment and prevention programs. It’s a great example of how an attorney general can have a real positive impact on the people of their state. Unfortunately, we also have a lot of examples of the harm that a corrupt or extremist attorney general can do. (Ken [https://www.motherjones.com/politics/2021/12/texas-attorney-general-ken-paxton-tried-to-overturn-the-election-now-hes-going-after-roe/] Paxton [https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2023/dec/08/ken-paxton-texas-abortion-kate-cox], for [https://www.texastribune.org/2023/06/16/ken-paxton-impeachment-allegations/] example [https://www.yahoo.com/news/texas-attorney-general-ken-paxton-184521190.html]) But the good news is, we the people have the power to elect them. In all but seven states (AK, HI, NH, NJ, WY, TN, & ME), voters choose their AG at the ballot box. Most attorneys general are up for election in 2026 or 2028, and in one pivotal state, Virginia, voters will get to elect a new attorney general in just a couple of months. This November, Jay Jones—a lawyer and former member of the Virginia House of Delegates—will square off against the current Virginia Attorney General, Jason Miyares. Miyares is a Republican and a supporter of Donald Trump, campaigning for him and supporting his policies. If you live in Virginia, be sure you come to the polls in November prepared to vote for attorney general. And if you don’t live in Virginia, chances are you’ll have the chance to vote for your own AG very soon! It’s not just about rejecting extremism. It’s about choosing a “People’s Lawyer” who actually works for the people.

Okay, But Why is RFK Jr. so Obsessed with Autism?

Robert F. Kennedy Jr., the Secretary of Health and Human Services, recently announced that he’d be “revealing” the “cause of autism” this month. It’s true that rates of diagnosis have gone up over the past 20 years — from 1 in 150 kids to 1 in 31 — but autism advocates are worried that Kennedy’s mission will do more harm than good.  In the past, RFK Jr. has spread disinformation about vaccines, including exhaustively disproven links to autism. (Seriously, we’re talking thousands of studies on millions of patients. Vaccines do not cause autism!) Now the Wall Street Journal has reported that his new theory is about the use of Tylenol in pregnancy. But just last year, the Journal of the American Medical Association published a huge study proving that Tylenol isn’t linked to autism or ADHD. Most doctors believe that autism is caused by genetics, and kids with a sibling or parent who’s autistic are more likely to be diagnosed themselves. A study published in 2019 estimated the heritability of autism at about 80%, about the same as the heritability of height. So then… what’s causing the spike in autism? The answer is simple: we’re getting better at diagnosing it. Doctors have especially made strides in diagnosing women and girls. Autistic girls often struggle more internally than externally and their response may look like shyness, which our society finds more acceptable in girls than in boys. Across all genders and ages, no two people with autism are exactly the same. If RFK Jr. actually talked to anyone with autism, he might realize that he’s pushing stereotypes and disinformation. And on top of all that, RFK Jr. and Trump have actually cut more than 50 federal research projects on autism, firing scientists who have been working on this for years. If they really wanted to help people with autism, why would they cut that funding? In this week’s episode of Okay, But Why, we’re exploring what we do and don’t know about autism, busting myths and disinformation, and hearing from actual autistic people in their own words.

Okay, But Why Are Romance Novels Political?

When people think of romance novels, the first thing that comes to mind is shirtless Dukes with windswept hair on the covers of mass-market paperbacks. The damsel in distress main character who is waiting for a love interest to come and save her from the clutches of evil. They’re a thing for girls. It isn’t ‘real’ reading, because they are stories typically written by women, for women, and starring women.  But what if we told you that romance books, even the most quote-unquote “raunchy” of the genre, are deeply political? Who gets to be the hero or the heroine matters. Romance, as a genre, has seen major shifts in recent years, evolving from stories focused on white, heterosexual protagonists to a more diverse range of characters, lives, and themes. LGBTQ+ characters and relationships have entire shelves dedicated to them in bookstores. Black female characters now receive the same fairytale endings that they’ve always deserved.  By centering these stories, romance novels assert that marginalized voices belong at the center of the narrative, not just the margins. And that’s more important than ever as Trump and his allies work to silence these voices.  So the next time you hear someone make fun of romance novels, just know that they have no idea what they’re talking about. They likely view the genre as frivolous or even intellectually inferior, but this opinion completely misses the critical political commentary and diverse storytelling that define the books that so many of us love.

Okay, But Why is Gay Marriage at Risk?

In June of 2015, the Supreme Court made history by ruling that Jim Obergefell and other same-sex couples deserve the right to have their marriages legally recognized — not just in a few states, but across the country.  It’s strange to think that only happened ten years ago. Gay couples across the country have only had the right to marry the person they love since the year of Jurassic World and the first run of Hamilton and that dress on the internet that nobody could agree was blue and black or white and gold. And it was only eleven years before that, in 2004, that the very first legal gay wedding was held anywhere in the country. As we saw with Roe v Wade, though, Supreme Court cases can be overturned and rights can be taken away. Right now, there’s real concern that the Supreme Court will re-examine Obergefell in the next year. In 2022, after Roe v Wade was struck down, Justice Clarence Thomas wrote that the Court should turn their attention to other cases of equal rights… like Obergefell.  And now, he might get his chance. Kentucky country clerk Kim Davis filed an official petition this month asking the Supreme Court to re-examine the case. Yes, that Kim Davis. The one who went to jail for 5 days in 2015 for refusing to sign marriage licenses for gay couples. Doesn’t she have better things to do than work this hard to take away other people’s rights? We have more than a decade of studies now that prove how much of a difference the right to marry has made for gay couples across the country. Married same-sex couples report better life satisfaction, better physical health, and higher rates of homeownership than unmarried same-sex couples. Once married, they can get on each other’s health insurance, file taxes jointly, and act as legal next of kin in cases of life or death. By contrast, not a single study has been able to prove any negative effects. Divorce rates across the board have fallen for all types of married couples and children of same-sex couples have the same educational and health outcomes as those in a household with a mother and father. The majority of Americans believe in marriage equality and the separation of church and state. But for hundreds of thousands of gay couples across the country, the right to get married isn’t abstract — it affects their daily lives, their finances, their health, and their family.