Is Accommodating Your Autistic Child's Anxiety Making Things Worse?

Is Accommodating Your Autistic Child's Anxiety Making Things Worse?

Kelley Jensen and Julianna Scott break down SPACE — Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions — a therapeutic approach originally developed in the 1980s that is now being studied for autistic children and teens. Kelley noticed a growing shift in parenting communities away from radical accommodation and toward setting boundaries, and the hosts explore why that matters. Using co-sleeping as a central example, they discuss how accommodating fear-based anxiety in the short term can reinforce it over time, and how SPACE offers a research-backed alternative that builds distress tolerance while still honoring genuine sensory and processing needs. Key Takeaways * SPACE stands for Supportive Parenting for Anxious Childhood Emotions and was originally developed in the 1980s for general parenting, not specifically for autism. * Research shows that family accommodation alleviates anxiety in the short term but is linked to increased symptom severity, greater functional impairment, and higher caregiver burden over time. * SPACE has shown preliminary evidence of effectiveness: parents rated it highly satisfactory, and both anxiety severity and family accommodation were significantly reduced following treatment. * The key distinction for autistic kids: accommodate sensory needs, processing differences, and communication needs — do NOT accommodate fear-based anxiety. * Co-sleeping is a classic example of an accommodation that starts as a short-term fix but can become deeply ingrained by adolescence if not addressed early. * Anxiety that is not addressed tends to grow — children are unlikely to simply "grow out of it" if the fear has been repeatedly reinforced. * SPACE uses gradual scaffolding, not cold turkey — slowly introduce coping strategies and mitigating measures to build tolerance without creating more anxiety. * The approach overlaps with ABA principles: identify the function of the behavior, avoid reinforcing avoidance, and build skills incrementally. * Prioritize by function: address sleep, health, and daily functioning first, and tackle one behavior at a time rather than everything at once. * Waiting until a child is older to address entrenched anxiety habits means undoing years of reinforcement on top of the original fear — early intervention matters. 🔗 Learn More:  Website: refrigeratormoms.com  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormoms  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments including SAINT (Stanford Accelerated Intelligent Neuromodulation Therapy) for treatment-resistant depression and major depressive disorder, as well as MeRT (Magnetic e-resonance therapy) for autistic people aged three or older. Learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com Timestamps 00:00 Intro & what is SPACE? 01:00 Radical acceptance vs. setting limits 02:00 Kicking the can down the road 02:03 Sponsor: Brain Performance Technologies 03:00 SPACE sounds like solid parenting 03:09 Research background on SPACE 04:24 Co-sleeping case study walkthrough 05:13 Sponsor: Brain Performance Technologies / MeRT 05:43 Is the anxiety fear-based or sensory? 06:07 CBT, nightlights & scaffolding 06:18 Mapping SPACE onto autistic kids 07:03 Accommodate sensory needs, not fear 07:29 Scaffolding, routines & no cold turkey 07:57 SPACE and ABA overlap 08:03 Persistence, patience & positivity 08:47 Reinforcement is the real problem 09:54 Prioritize by function, one at a time 10:36 Undo years of reinforcement 10:48 Closing thoughts 10:50 Outro & disclaimer

Is Autism Therapy Actually Worth It? Here's How to Know

How do you sort real help from snake oil when you're researching autism interventions? In this episode of Refrigerator Moms, Julianna Scott and Kelley Jensen share a practical checklist for evaluating any autism therapy whether you're looking at evidence-based treatments like ABA and speech therapy, or exploring options further off the beaten path like TMS, dietary protocols, or supplement. They talk about why waiting for full FDA approval isn't realistic when your kid's childhood has an expiration date, and how to make smart, informed decisions in the meantime. Kelley and Julianna cover everything from vetting peer-reviewed research and checking provider qualifications to tracking your child's measurable progress and knowing when to pivot. They remind parents to account for comorbid diagnoses like anxiety, depression, and OCD, and they close with a pointed reminder to keep political noise out of your treatment decisions: you're raising a child, not joining a movement. Whether you're newly navigating an autism diagnosis or a seasoned parent looking to refine your approach, this episode offers a grounded, experience-backed framework for cutting through the overwhelm. 🔗 Learn More: Website: refrigeratormoms.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormoms Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments including SAINT (Stanford Accelerated Intelligent Neuromodulation Therapy) for treatment-resistant depression and major depressive disorder, as well as MeRT (Magnetic e-resonance therapy) for autistic people aged three or older. Learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com 00:00 Introduction & episode overview 00:54 Evidence-based treatments for autism 01:05 ABA is still worth it despite its issues 01:37 Sponsor: Brain Performance Technologies 02:04 Medications on-label for autism 02:57 The checklist: how to research interventions 03:09 Why parents have to try 03:31 Step 1: Find independent research 03:55 Exhaust insurance and school district first 04:05 Peer-reviewed journals vs. anecdotal claims 04:39 Reading summary studies and weighing evidence 05:31 Consider all comorbid diagnoses 06:20 Advocating for depression/mood diagnoses 07:18 Sponsor: Brain Performance Technologies (mid-roll) 07:45 Step 2: Check provider qualifications 08:29 Step 3: Evaluate claims critically 08:55 No cure, only better symptom management 09:10 Step 4: Cross-check multiple sources 09:45 Weigh the risk of harm before trying anything 10:10 Step 5: Consider international research 10:39 TMS research worldwide; MeRT Facebook group 11:28 Step 6: Track your child's progress 12:19 Adjust approach based on results 12:30 Step 7: Use community and professional support 13:07 Clinical trials as an option 13:28 Step 8: Maintain a critical, practical mindset 13:38 Keep politics out of treatment decisions 14:13 Combine sources for informed decisions 14:32 Closing & where to find resources

Real Parent Questions: Autism Accommodations, PDA, Team Sports & Young Adults Who've Checked Out

Julianna Scott and Kelley Jensen open up the social media mailbag for one of their most popular episode formats — real questions from parents, answered with the candor and hard-won experience that Refrigerator Moms is known for. This week's questions span the full arc of the parenting journey: a parent of a nine-year-old convinced they already know the diagnosis before the psychiatrist has said a word; a family watching their child struggle with what looks like panic attacks; a mom navigating conflicting advice about PDA (Pathological Demand Avoidance); and a volunteer baseball coach at a complete loss while an unsupported autistic child disrupts every practice. They talk about the problem with self- and parent-diagnosis, why depression is so often missed in high-functioning young adults, and why "he's autistic, deal with it" isn't a plan. They also revisit SPACE therapy, the limits of radical acceptance, and how to think about matching a child's actual skill level to the activities and environments you put them in. Whether you're new to this journey or deep in it, this episode delivers the kind of straight talk that helps you take the next step — whatever that looks like for your family. 🔗 Learn More: Website: refrigeratormoms.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormoms Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments including SAINT (Stanford Accelerated Intelligent Neuromodulation Therapy) for treatment-resistant depression and major depressive disorder, as well as MeRT (Magnetic e-resonance therapy) for autistic people aged three or older. Learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com 00:00 Intro: social media Q&A episode 00:17 Julianna's nerves about the format 00:36 Q1: Seeing a psychiatrist for first time 02:27 Intake process explained 04:04 Takeaway: don't parent-diagnose 05:12 HIPAA & adult child context 06:04 Sponsor: Brain Performance Technologies 06:31 Q2: Meltdowns escalating to panic attacks 06:47 Panic attacks need professional help 07:08 Q3: High-functioning, unmotivated young adult 08:54 Screen for depression first 09:19 Small steps & realistic expectations 10:23 Sponsor: SAINT treatment overview 11:09 Q4: Conflicting PDA advice 12:04 Know your child's specific circumstances 12:23 SPACE therapy reference 13:08 Be willing to pivot strategies 13:23 Q5: Autistic child on baseball team 14:01 Coach's role & league support 14:38 Parents need to be involved 15:30 Group sports vs. solo sports for autism 16:09 Parents can't just say "deal with it" 17:04 What does the child actually learn? 17:24 Lack of post-diagnosis support for parents 17:42 Outro & disclaimer

Why Your Autistic Child's Doctor Just Prescribes More Meds (And What Parents Can Do About It)

America has a psychiatric care crisis — and most families are living it without knowing why. Kelley Jensen and Julianna Scott dig into their new Refrigerator Paper, Psyched Out: No Appointments Available, to answer one of the most common questions they hear: "Why haven't I heard of TMS?" The answer, it turns out, starts long before a patient ever walks into a clinic. With only about 60,000 practicing psychiatrists in the country — and nearly half of Americans living in officially designated mental health shortage areas — access to care is shrinking just as demand explodes. Half of all lifetime mental illnesses begin by age 14, millions are entering the system earlier than ever, and a retirement wave is projected to remove tens of thousands more psychiatrists from the workforce by 2030. Meanwhile, only 5–10% of psychiatrists prescribe TMS, even though it's covered by insurance and backed by clinical evidence. The result? Medication becomes the default — including for autistic children — simply because it's the only tool most practitioners are trained to use. Kelley and Julianna aren't just naming the problem — they're making the case for real solutions: expanding GP accreditation for TMS, loosening restrictions on psychiatric nurse practitioners, and recruiting the next generation of psychiatrists. Most importantly, they're calling on families and consumers to demand more. If you've ever been handed a prescription and wondered whether there was another option, this one's for you. 🔗 Learn More: Website: refrigeratormoms.com [http://refrigeratormoms.com] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/ [https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormoms [https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormoms] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/ [https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/] TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms [https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms] Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments including SAINT (Stanford Accelerated Intelligent Neuromodulation Therapy) for treatment-resistant depression and major depressive disorder, as well as MeRT (Magnetic e-resonance therapy) for autistic people aged three or older. Learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com [https://brainperformancetechnologies.com/] * (00:00) - Introduction & episode overview * (00:29) - What is "Psyched Out" paper about? * (01:17) - Scale of the mental health crisis * (02:06) - Sponsor: Brain Performance Technologies * (02:33) - How few psychiatrists are there? * (03:39) - Psychiatrists retiring & the funding gap * (04:16) - How to become a psychiatrist * (05:15) - Psychiatric nurse practitioners * (05:38) - The coming retirement wave by 2030 * (06:00) - Mental health shortage areas * (06:37) - Sponsor: SAINT protocol explained * (07:19) - Medication as the default for autism * (08:12) - GPs filling the prescription gap * (08:41) - 42% of antidepressants from GPs * (09:33) - Why TMS remains underutilized * (10:23) - What you can do about it * (11:22) - Closing thoughts * (11:24) - Subscribe & find resources * (11:46) - Disclaimer

Should You Avoid ABA? | Autism Parents Confront the $600M Fraud

ABA therapy is under fire — and autism families deserve the full story. Kelley Jensen and Julianna Scott dig into the federal fraud audits targeting ABA providers, with up to $600 million in improper Medicaid payments identified by the Department of Health and Human Services. They walk through how ABA earned its status as a covered benefit, how private equity exploited that coverage, and what fraudulent billing actually looks like in practice. This episode is paired with the Refrigerator Moms paper "ABA: As Easy as ABC," which gives families a comprehensive resource for understanding and navigating ABA therapy. Kelley and Julianna share their own experiences navigating the ABA world as autism parents and give concrete steps families can take right now to vet providers, monitor therapy delivery, and protect themselves from fraud without walking away from a therapy that — done right — can still make a real difference. Bottom line: don't throw the baby out with the bathwater. The fraud is real and it's serious, but so is the value of quality, evidence-based ABA. Your job as a parent is to be an informed, engaged consumer — and this episode tells you exactly how. 🔗 Learn More:  Website: refrigeratormoms.com  Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/refrigeratormoms/  LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/refrigeratormoms  Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/refrigeratormoms/  TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@RefrigeratorMoms Refrigerator Moms is sponsored by Brain Performance Technologies, a specialty mental health clinic that offers neuromodulation treatments including SAINT (Stanford Accelerated Intelligent Neuromodulation Therapy) for treatment-resistant depression and major depressive disorder, as well as MeRT (Magnetic e-resonance therapy) for autistic people aged three or older. Learn more at https://brainperformancetechnologies.com 00:00 Fraud and disabled people 00:33 ABA fraud audits overview 01:12 ABA history and insurance coverage 02:00 Parents fought for ABA benefits 03:02 Sponsor: Brain Performance Technologies 03:40 Private equity enters the ABA space 04:57 Bankruptcies and billing fraud 05:34 Federal audit findings: $600M 06:36 Industry credibility takes a hit 07:08 Types of fraud: billing, credentials 08:02 Should you still pursue ABA? 08:53 Step 1: Decide if ABA fits your family 09:07 What ABA actually looks like 09:53 Range of ABA applications 10:18 Step 2: Verify provider credentials 10:47 Filing complaints with insurers 11:53 Sponsor: SAINT protocol 12:35 Step 3: Understand the therapy plan 13:19 Step 4: Research provider reputation 13:42 University programs as a resource 14:32 High therapist turnover — what to do 15:40 Step 5: Monitor therapy delivery 15:58 In-home vs. center-based therapy 16:39 Step 6: Review billing and claims 16:57 Step 7: Stay informed and advocate 17:10 Consumer power and whistleblowing 17:40 Step 8: Balance caution with access 17:54 Most ABA providers are ethical 18:03 Closing thoughts