the ACT OUT podcast

How Real Change Happens Without Force or Shame: The Truth About Trauma Responses

Welcome back to the ACT OUT podcast! In this episode, host Adam Tomlin sits down with trauma therapist Trisha Wolfe for a fascinating and deeply relatable conversation about the brain, childhood trauma, emotional survival strategies, and why so many people intellectualize their feelings instead of actually processing them. What starts as a discussion about brain development quickly turns into an eye-opening look at how our earliest experiences shape the way we think, connect, regulate emotions, and navigate relationships throughout our lives. Trisha breaks down how the brain develops from infancy, explaining how early attachment, emotional connection, and unmet needs create the neural pathways that shape our sense of safety, trust, and self-worth. Adam and Trisha explore how coping mechanisms that once protected us as children—like overthinking, analyzing other people’s behavior, or shutting down emotionally—can later become barriers to vulnerability, healing, and authentic connection. The conversation also dives into trauma responses, nervous system regulation, emotional avoidance, and the difference between understanding emotions intellectually versus actually feeling them. Trisha shares insights from both her professional work as a trauma therapist and her own lived experience as a “recovering intellectualizer,” helping explain why so many people stay stuck in cycles of anxiety, hyper-awareness, people-pleasing, or emotional detachment without realizing where those patterns began. Adam and Trisha also unpack the importance of safe relationships, emotional attunement, and how healing often starts by recognizing the unconscious beliefs we formed as children. Together, they challenge the idea that healing is about “fixing” yourself and instead frame it as learning how to reconnect with your emotions, nervous system, and sense of safety in the world. If you’ve ever wondered why you react the way you do, struggle to fully feel your emotions, or find yourself constantly trying to “logic” your way out of pain, this episode offers a powerful and accessible look at how trauma shapes the brain—and what healing can actually look like. Learn more about Trisha Wolfe here [https://www.cbustherapy.com/]. Tune in every Thursday for episodes that inspire, challenge, and entertain. Whether you’re here for laughs, lived wisdom, or action steps, the ACT OUT podcast is your space to rethink growth, embrace self-awareness, and act out your passions. Want to be a guest on the ACT OUT podcast? Send Adam Tomlin a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc [https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc] Other ways to follow and connect with the ACT OUT podcast: Learn more at:https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/ [https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/] Subscribe to the show on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast [https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast] Follow the show on Instagram: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/actoutpodcast/] & TikTok: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@actoutpodcast] Credits: Mural: Tara E. @‌taradiiiise [https://www.instagram.com/taradiiiise/] and @‌tarayakisauce [https://www.tiktok.com/@tarayakisauce]

Pregnancy, Politics and Public Perception: The Double Standards Women Face in Politics

Welcome back to the ACT OUT podcast! In this episode, host Adam Tomlin sits down with Lisa Vedernikova Khanna for a compelling conversation about politics, identity, motherhood, and what it’s like running for office while pregnant. Lisa shares her journey from growing up in Russia to building a life in the United States, eventually stepping into the political arena and discovering firsthand how difficult it can be to balance public expectations, personal ambition, and family life all at once. Adam and Lisa dive into her campaign experience, including the reactions she received while running for office during pregnancy and the unique challenges women—especially mothers—often face in politics. Lisa opens up about navigating stereotypes, managing public perception, and why pregnancy unexpectedly became one of the biggest talking points of her campaign. Together, they explore the broader cultural expectations placed on women in leadership and how those expectations shape the way candidates are viewed by voters and the media. The conversation also explores Lisa’s perspective as an immigrant from Russia and how her background shaped the way she views politics, opportunity, and civic engagement in America. Adam and Lisa discuss the emotional complexity of adapting to a new culture while still holding onto parts of your identity, as well as the importance of having more nuanced, human conversations around politics instead of reducing people to labels or headlines. If you’ve ever wondered what it’s really like to run for office as a woman, how motherhood impacts political careers, or how cultural identity shapes the way we engage with politics and community, this episode offers an honest and thought-provoking perspective on leadership, resilience, and authenticity. Learn more about Lisa Vedernikova Khanna here [https://www.lvk.vote/]. Tune in every Thursday for episodes that inspire, challenge, and entertain. Whether you’re here for laughs, lived wisdom, or action steps, the ACT OUT podcast is your space to rethink growth, embrace self-awareness, and act out your passions. Want to be a guest on the ACT OUT podcast? Send Adam Tomlin a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc [https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc] Other ways to follow and connect with the ACT OUT podcast: Learn more at:https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/ [https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/] Subscribe to the show on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast [https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast] Follow the show on Instagram: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/actoutpodcast/] & TikTok: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@actoutpodcast] Credits: Mural: Tara E. @‌taradiiiise [https://www.instagram.com/taradiiiise/] and @‌tarayakisauce [https://www.tiktok.com/@tarayakisauce]

Navigating Identity, Culture & Resilience: A Powerful Iranian Immigrant Story

Welcome back to the ACT OUT podcast! In this episode, host Adam Tomlin sits down with Zolal Habibi for a powerful and insightful conversation about identity, resilience, and what it means to navigate life between cultures. Zolal shares her personal story of growing up as an Iranian refugee, offering a raw and honest look at the challenges of displacement, cultural expectations, and finding your place in the world. Adam and Zolal dive into the complexities of balancing tradition with individuality—especially as a woman navigating both personal ambition and cultural norms. Zolal opens up about the pressure to meet expectations, the fear that can come with stepping outside of them, and how she’s learned to define success on her own terms. Together, they explore how identity is shaped not just by where you come from, but by the choices you make along the way. The conversation also highlights the strength that comes from adversity, the importance of storytelling, and how sharing lived experiences can create connection and understanding across cultures. Zolal reflects on the moments that shaped her perspective, the lessons she’s carried forward, and why embracing your voice—no matter how uncomfortable it may feel—is one of the most powerful things you can do. If you’ve ever struggled with identity, felt caught between expectations and authenticity, or want to better understand the immigrant experience and the resilience behind it, this episode offers a meaningful and thought-provoking perspective. Learn more about Zolal Habibi: * FB: https://www.facebook.com/IranNCR/ [https://www.facebook.com/IranNCR/] * Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ashrafi4ever/ [https://www.instagram.com/ashrafi4ever/] * X (Twitter): https://x.com/ashrafi4ever [https://x.com/ashrafi4ever] * LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/zolalhabibi [https://www.linkedin.com/in/zolalhabibi] Links about the Iranian Resistance: * National Council of Resistance of Iran (NCRI): https://www.ncr-iran.org/ [https://www.ncr-iran.org/] * Maryam Rajavi – 4 Change: https://maryamrajavi4change.com/ [https://maryamrajavi4change.com/] * Iran Freedom: https://iranfreedom.org/ [https://iranfreedom.org/] * Organization of Iranian American Communities (OIAC): https://oiac.org/ [https://oiac.org/] Tune in every Thursday for episodes that inspire, challenge, and entertain. Whether you’re here for laughs, lived wisdom, or action steps, the ACT OUT podcast is your space to rethink growth, embrace self-awareness, and act out your passions. Want to be a guest on the ACT OUT podcast? Send Adam Tomlin a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc [https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc] Other ways to follow and connect with the ACT OUT podcast: Learn more at:https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/ [https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/] Subscribe to the show on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast [https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast] Follow the show on Instagram: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/actoutpodcast/] & TikTok: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@actoutpodcast] Credits: Mural: Tara E. @‌taradiiiise [https://www.instagram.com/taradiiiise/] and @‌tarayakisauce [https://www.tiktok.com/@tarayakisauce]

Live Like You’re Dying: A Hospice Chaplain on Death and the Meaning of Life

Welcome back to the ACT OUT podcast! In this episode, Adam Tomlin sits down with Lee Atherton, a hospice chaplain and end-of-life grief coach, for a deeply meaningful and eye-opening conversation about death, dying, and what it truly means to live a complete life. What begins as a discussion about Lee’s unique career quickly evolves into a powerful exploration of grief, spirituality, and the human experience at life’s most vulnerable moments. Lee shares how she unexpectedly found her calling in hospice care and what it’s like to walk alongside people as they live the final chapter of their lives. From supporting families through grief to helping individuals find peace, forgiveness, and connection before they pass, she offers insight into the emotional, spiritual, and psychological realities of end-of-life care. Adam and Lee also dive into the common fears people face around death, the importance of saying goodbye, and how unresolved relationships can impact both the dying process and the grieving process. Throughout the conversation, Lee breaks down what grief actually looks like—why it doesn’t follow a linear path, how it can resurface years later, and why it’s different for everyone. Adam shares personal stories of loss, adding a raw and relatable layer to the discussion, while Lee offers perspective on how to navigate grief in a healthy, supported way. They also explore powerful moments from Lee’s career, including helping reconnect families, fulfilling final wishes, and witnessing the unexplainable experiences that often happen at the end of life. If you’ve ever wondered what happens at the end of life, how to cope with grief, or what truly matters when everything else fades away, this episode offers a perspective that is both grounding and deeply impactful. Learn more about Lee Atherton: https://www.coachrev.com/ [https://www.coachrev.com/] Tune in every Thursday for episodes that inspire, challenge, and entertain. Whether you’re here for laughs, lived wisdom, or action steps, the ACT OUT podcast is your space to rethink growth, embrace self-awareness, and act out your passions. Want to be a guest on the ACT OUT podcast? Send Adam Tomlin a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc [https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc] Other ways to follow and connect with the ACT OUT podcast: Learn more at:https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/ [https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/] Subscribe to the show on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast [https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast] Follow the show on Instagram: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/actoutpodcast/] & TikTok: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@actoutpodcast] Credits: Mural: Tara E. @‌taradiiiise [https://www.instagram.com/taradiiiise/] and @‌tarayakisauce [https://www.tiktok.com/@tarayakisauce]

Surviving a Traumatic Brain Injury: Mental Health, Healing & Identity

Welcome back to the ACT OUT podcast! In this episode, host Adam Tomlin sits down with Nicholas Ruchlewicz, a traumatic brain injury survivor, mental health advocate, and self-proclaimed nerd, for an honest and deeply personal conversation about trauma, healing, and what it means to keep rebuilding yourself after life changes in an instant. What starts as a conversation about Nicholas’s advocacy work quickly becomes a powerful look at survival, vulnerability, and the invisible weight of recovery. Nicholas shares the story of his life-changing motorcycle crash in 2016, including the traumatic brain injury, brain bleed, and long road through physical and cognitive rehabilitation. Adam and Nicholas talk about the emotional toll of recovery, the frightening reality of being alone with your thoughts after trauma, and why men with traumatic brain injuries face such serious mental health risks. Nicholas also opens up about how therapy helped him long before his accident—and why that foundation may have saved his life after it. The conversation also dives into anger as a secondary emotion, the stigma men face around vulnerability, and the ways trauma can intensify underlying struggles like ADHD, emotional regulation, and self-worth. Nicholas explains how he learned to slow down, recognize his triggers, and build new habits through speech therapy, cognitive behavioral work, and daily accountability. Along the way, Adam and Nicholas explore something unexpected but incredibly meaningful: how gaming, music, and community became part of Nicholas’s healing and helped him feel less alone. If you’ve ever wondered what recovery after a traumatic brain injury really looks like, how therapy can reshape the way you handle pain, or why vulnerability is one of the strongest things a person can practice, this episode will stay with you. Learn more about Nicholas Ruchlewicz here [https://linktr.ee/giftofperspective]. Tune in every Thursday for episodes that inspire, challenge, and entertain. Whether you’re here for laughs, lived wisdom, or action steps, the ACT OUT podcast is your space to rethink growth, embrace self-awareness, and act out your passions. Want to be a guest on the ACT OUT podcast? Send Adam Tomlin a message on PodMatch, here: https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc [https://www.podmatch.com/hostdetailpreview/17697025629686282ce7409dc] Other ways to follow and connect with the ACT OUT podcast: Learn more at:https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/ [https://www.theactoutpodcast.com/] Subscribe to the show on YouTube:https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast [https://www.youtube.com/@theACTOUTpodcast] Follow the show on Instagram: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/actoutpodcast/] & TikTok: @‌actoutpodcast [https://www.tiktok.com/@actoutpodcast] Credits: Mural: Tara E. @‌taradiiiise [https://www.instagram.com/taradiiiise/] and @‌tarayakisauce [https://www.tiktok.com/@tarayakisauce]