Hunger Strike Enabled by Honey Buns | The Alligator News Roundup

Hunger Strike Enabled by Honey Buns | The Alligator News Roundup

Number 4. The Blaze. Protesters denounce ICE with hunger strike and turn to comfort food instead [https://www.theblaze.com/shows/sara-gonzales-unfiltered/ice-detention-protest-narrative-full-of-lies]. Impassioned detainees at an ICE facility in New Jersey protested last week by staging a hunger strike. Delaney Hall [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Delaney_Hall]in Newark is a privately operated detention center for some 400 illegal aliens held for deportation. Amid complaints of poor sanitation and medical neglect, the detainees had had enough. They showed their outrage by refusing to eat the food served, which they claimed was spoiled anyway. The fact that no evidence of spoiled food was presented is neither here nor there. What is important is that those who entered the USA illegally and were arrested by ICE were determined to remain “here” and not be returned to “there.” Meanwhile, a guy’s gotta eat. Fortunately, Delaney Hall offers a commissary featuring such healthy items as Snickers bars, Honey Buns and Hot Cheetos. Sales doubled in the week of the strike. I know a hunger strike is a serious affair, but shifting one’s diet from institutional fare (no doubt state-inspected and approved) to junk food seems distinctly unserious. Where else in the world can you get a Honey Bun to tide you over while you hurl insults at guards? I haven’t had a Honey Bun in years. This makes me a little hungry. Look, I know it’s hard. Forcing people to comply with the rule of law is not for the faint of heart. To channel [https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/140634-those-who-would-give-up-essential-liberty-to-purchase-a]Benjamin Franklin, “those who would give away their principles to show their kindness will soon have neither.” Number 3. Alpha News. Charges dropped against Easter church service invader. [https://alphanews.org/serial-anti-ice-agitator-arrested-after-disrupting-easter-service-at-cities-church/] Cities Church in St. Paul, Minnesota, was the scene of a confrontational disruption on Easter Sunday this year when a group of anti-ICE protestors invaded the morning worship service. Led in part by former CNN left-wing (but I repeat myself) commentator Don Lemon, [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Don_Lemon] who just happened to be in the area that morning looking for a way to praise Jesus on Resurrection Sunday, blow-horn in hand, some 39 protestors defied uniformed security and entered the sanctuary. The in-your-face dispute prevented parents from joining their children, who were no doubt terrified, down the hall in Children’s Church. Video footage abounds, of course, this being the modern age. The District Court Judge who thoroughly reviewed evidence the following morning determined after a few minutes’ careful thought that there was “no probable cause” that would justify prosecution for one Emily Heather Phillips of Wisconsin. She had been arrested in the melee after refusing a police officer’s verbal order to stand down. No doubt the red-haired Ms. Phillips, who on Instagram goes by the handle redw.itch333, had also been cruising quiet suburbs the next state over looking for a loving Christian congregation to join for fellowship and communion. The St. Paul City Attorney provided a little more insight into the decision to drop the charges. Irene Kao [https://www.mprnews.org/story/2026/06/03/st-paul-city-attorney-wont-file-charges-against-cities-church-protesters] equated the right to peacefully protest (which now somehow includes blow horns, chanting, and obstructing someone else’s church service on private property) with the freedom to worship. The invasion seemed to arise from opposition to one of the Cities Church pastors who, it was claimed, was an ICE employee. Maybe he was, maybe he wasn’t. Doesn’t really matter. If you have already determined your cause, any old justification will do. (This, BTW, is the distinction [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Z5nfhuRTGg] between Critical Thinking and Critical Theory. Blurring that line is a death sentence for America. But I digress.) One thing from the Cities Church contretemps [https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/contretemps] that occurs to me is this: “prevented parents from joining their children,” seems to have been overlooked. If, through physical intimidation, I restrict you from moving to a location you desire to reach, doesn’t that constitute something akin to kidnapping? Maybe it is only “false imprisonment [https://www.myrightslawgroup.com/blog/kidnapping-vs-false-imprisonment-movement-requirement/],” which in some states is a misdemeanor rather than a felony. Either way, it appears there are legal grounds for something other than, “Never mind, I know in your heart you were sincere. Have a nice day. Meanwhile, here’s your mugshot, worth a few hundred thousand more clicks.” To be fair, I only raise the issue because an old episode of The FBI [https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0058801/], starring Efrem Zimbalist Jr., included it in the script. Back in the day. Or maybe it was 77 Sunset Strip [https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0051247/]. Whatever. But seriously, laws are spelled out for a reason. This system doesn’t work if they are ignored. To quote an elected local government official who once dismissed an obvious city violation committed by a friend, “That’s a law we just don’t enforce here.” The irony of an obviously lawless rebellion in a city named for the apostle who wrote, “Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers, [https://biblehub.com/kjv/romans/13.htm]” ought not be lost on us. In an admonishment strangely apropos [https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/apropos]to our situation today, he followed a few sentences later with, “It is high time to awake out of sleep.” I suppose he put it that way because “Pull your head out!” had not yet joined the vernacular [https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/vernacular]. Number 2. Persecution dot org. Nigerian pastor urges armed self-defense: “Protecting life is not a crime.” [https://persecution.org/2026/01/27/activists-call-for-self-defense-measures-after-fulani-militias-kill-7-christians-in-nigeria/] In an on-going attempt to ensure peace, tranquility and a lawful, ordered society, Nigerian militia stormed a barracks at 1:00 AM and shot dead seven sleeping men who were allegedly part of an illegal mining operation. The Fulani militia, brandishing weapons, takes its role in standing up for truth and justice seriously. The fact that the victims were Christians in a predominantly Muslim nation has no bearing, nor does the history of widespread armed violence against churches across a country where private ownership of firearms is strictly forbidden. As for illegal mining, yes, the vics were probably up to something illegal. The article does not indicate what type of mining, nor what forces had persuaded laws against it. I smell money at work here someplace, but I am admittedly a cynic on such things. Government troops stationed nearby and charged with protecting the populace from groups like [https://www.pewresearch.org/short-reads/2025/11/11/5-facts-about-religion-in-nigeria/] the Fulani militia, Boka Haram and the Islamic State West Africa Province, leaped into action. As well they should, as those organizations are noted for wantonly burning both churches and mosques alike. “Leaped into action,” however, may overstate the case. The 1:00 AM attack site was visited eight hours later by first responders, who said, “Yep, looks like another bloodbath.” Interestingly, the Christian minister who led the burial service put into words what many Americans believe but often have trouble verbalizing clearly: “We preach peace, but peace must not mean surrender to slaughter,” he said. “The right to life is sacred, and protecting that life is not a crime.” If you slap a man for being a Christian, that’s one thing. If you turn a pistol on him, that may be something else entirely. Number 1. Inter Newscast dot com. Armed teens are overmatched by a retired Marine. [https://internewscast.com/news/us/marine-veteran-jheyco-borda-successfully-defends-against-armed-carjacking-attempt-by-four-masked-teens-in-maryland/] In a classic failure to read the room, four teenaged men sought to steal a pickup truck from a Maryland man outside his home in broad daylight. What they had on their side was a pistol. Showing the gun probably was a poor choice. Former Marine Jheyco Borda simply took the gun away and threw the tough guy to the ground. Borda’s brother emerged from the house and wrestled down a second one. The other two, passionate “one for all and all for one” types, fled on foot. Police arrived and arrested all four assailants. Choose your audience. Someone has called events like this, “a catastrophic failure of the victim selection process.” And… an update on the Gone Scientists. This story has fallen off the front pages, but I sincerely hope someone somewhere continues to investigate. Where is Efrem Zimbalist Jr., when you really need him? The remains of Melissa Casias, the Los Alamos National Laboratory administrative assistant who disappeared while hiking a year ago, were discovered [https://redstate.com/beckynoble/2026/06/01/body-of-one-of-the-eleven-mysteriously-missing-scientists-found-n2202936] in Carson National Forest, New Mexico. Casias’ disappearance has been linked to that of other Americans who had access to highly restricted documents related to national security. Nuclear developments, rocket technology, and so forth. To date, I have seen no further word on the others. Unlike some reporting on this most recent find, this does not “bring to closure” the matter of her death. She died for some reason, maybe self-inflicted, maybe not. The others disappeared or died for other reasons. I would really like to know what those reasons might include, and who might be behind them. And thanks for joining The Alligator News Roundup for Friday, June 12, 2026. I am happy to report that recovery from last week’s hip surgery proceeds apace and has not yet riled domestic disturbance in a household where the guy who is normally away for hours each day has now suddenly been forced indoors with Mrs. Alligator. She is dutiful, gracious and long-suffering, and occasionally shows it. And, some astute readers will note it was exactly four years ago today that I saw a doctor who first uttered the word “leukemia” in my presence. Time marches on. Have a good weekend. Get full access to The Alligator Blog at alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe [https://alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Helpful AI Wipes Out Entire Database | The Alligator News Roundup

Number 4. The Guardian. AI agent makes bold confession after irreplaceable data destroyed. [https://www.theguardian.com/technology/2026/apr/29/claude-ai-deletes-firm-database] A friend of mine in banking told me he has used an artificial intelligence agent for ten years. “I can’t do this volume of coding without it,” he reports. He, like most who follow the ANR, is clever and intelligent. He knows how to drive his AI agent, and he knows where the ditches are. Would you hand a scalpel to a plumber? Sure, under the right circumstances. (No offense to plumbers—I have found they are a huge contributor to my quality of life.) In the case of Pocket OS, a software outfit that serves multiple rental car agencies, the scalpel they wielded came with its own ideas about where to cut. It decided the entire company database needed to be exorcised—including all backups. The operation took 9 seconds, and… poof! it was gone. Claude, the Anthropic AI offering, employed a tool called Cursor, running on an API called Railway. Clear so far? During a routine update, Cursor (which now seems to be an appropriate name) encountered a problem and, per its instructions, sought to remove it. The removal process was executed by Railway, which, per its instructions, completely solved the problem and returned results to Cursor. Which discovered that not only had the problem been removed, but so had everything else in the database. Everything. Customer records, billing statements, future reservations, payment history, yada yada. For multiple rental car clients, which meant many thousands of rental customers. When challenged in the “who shot John” follow-up, Cursor admitted it had passed the command to Railway without first reading Railway’s documentation file. Basically: “Sorry about that, Chief.” [https://getsmart.fandom.com/wiki/Maxwell_Smart] While writing a middle grade action-adventure story (my latest time sink obsession) I have used ChatGPT extensively for line editing and timeline consistency: How to have this character say this better? is this timeframe reasonable for that activity? etc. Occasionally Chat will forget what chapter we are in and who the other characters are. I have had to stop and prompt: Please read the entire file I just uploaded, then answer my question again. Invariably, the response is a very pleasant and honest, “Oh, you are absolutely right to question this. Now that have I read the file, here is the correct answer…” Meanwhile, if Chat and I ever get this project into print, I’ll let you know. So, use the scalpel with your own intelligence, not someone else’s. Number 3. AP News. Another Ebola treatment center is set ablaze, spreading virus further. [https://apnews.com/article/congo-ebola-outbreak-who-spread-response-18537353976a958687e55f95434c918c] With yet another outbreak of the deadly and highly contagious Ebola virus in the Congo this month, local burial practices have once again conflicted with careful medical treatment. The body of a local man was held in a clinic after his death. His friends, “local youths” according to the article, demanded his body for proper burial. They were denied for reasons of protocol safety in handling infected remains. Logically, the local youths were angered. They showed it by setting fire to the clinic, then fleeing the scene. Presumably, the act of vandalism, causing uncertain spreading of the virus as well as certain difficulty in treating other cases, will appease whatever cosmic forces had demanded proper burial services. Perhaps those unnamed cosmic forces need to get up with the times. They could probably just tap into the AP News feed and modify burial service methods as necessary. This reminds me of a statement made on talk radio during the 1992 Rodney King riots [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/1992_Los_Angeles_riots] in LA. A week of violent unrest resulted in 63 dead, 2,000+ injured and $1 billion in property damage. Walter E. Williams, a quick-witted and eloquent black economist guest hosting for Rush Limbaugh, said something like: “And now I’ve got a word for my own folks out there. The next time the white man does something you don’t like, don’t burn down your own neighborhood.” Number 2. NBC News. Fast food worker refunds mac ‘n’ cheese purchases to his own credit card. Does not end well for him. [https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/texas-man-nabbed-mac-cheese-caper-chick-fil-a-rcna342938] A young Chick-fil-A employee in Texas was just trying to get a little of his own back. Exploring the wonders of a state-of-the-art cash register, to which for some reason he had been given full access, he discovered how to accept a customer-prompted return. A credit could be issued to the customer for an unwanted or unsatisfactory purchase. Chasing the technology curve, young Mr. Jones further recognized that the refund could be applied to a credit card electronically. No more swiping Andrew Jacksons from the cash drawer. Probably he understood that someone would notice missing cash at the end of the day. Cleverly, he opened a brand new credit card account and went to town. “They’ll NEVER find me NOW!” Unfortunately, he had not chased the tech curve far enough to realize that his employer’s refunds were immediately noted as flowing to the new credit card account in his own name. Nor did he understand that the surveillance cameras in the restaurant watched more than customers stealing soft drinks. Poor Mr. Jones. It’s tough to get ahead when the cards are stacked against you. In about 1975, I worked at a university cafeteria. The pots-n-pans guy and the custodian were antagonists toward one another, which was awkward in that they shared a common locker room with adjacent lockers. One day, the custodian’s checkbook turned up missing. By complete coincidence, the next week a check with an unreadable signature made a payment on the dishwasher’s trailer house. Quite the mystery. The wheels of justice ground forward. I marvel. Only by the grace of God has our world survived thus far. A cynic might speculate that is what the judge and prophet Samuel implied with his proclamation of “Ebenezer!” in 1 Samuel 7:12. (“So far, the LORD has helped us.”) Number 1. People online. Well-intentioned woman stocks help-the-poor fridge, finds it wiped out in the first hour. [https://people.com/usd1-800-community-fridge-donation-gone-within-an-hour-11982317] It was a noble way to address a problem that had no solution. A Brashawnee Johnson felt called to fill up the local community refrigerator, so that her less fortunate neighbors could have something for dinner. While the “something” involved peanut butter and vienna sausages, at least it was a kind gesture. Ms. Johnson spent $1,800 on carefully selected items, lovingly placing them in the unsecured Louisiana fridge. Less than an hour later, it was all gone. She suspects there were people who were more greedy than hungry, but she can’t be sure. Security cameras have now been placed to help police track inappropriate appropriations of the foodstuffs. Which leads to a challenge for investigators: What, exactly, will you ask the suspects once they are identified? “Were you really hungry?” Ms. Johnson is undeterred. She plans to continue contributions, in the hopes that some truly in need are helped. That is admirable. The onliest tinge of concern might be that the $1,800 gift was funded by Brashawnee Johnson’s non-profit, The Village Foundation. [https://volunteer.com/] I found zero reference to The Village Foundation other than many articles and social media posts bemoaning the sudden loss, and most spilling some angst over other hungries who could have used the vienna sausages. There is absolutely nothing to suggest anything wrong or fraudulent here. However, channeling Reagan, “Trust, but verify.” I would like to see a touch more research into the non-profit. Specifically, besides personal tax write-offs for donations, what other government tax dollars might support the charity? But that’s just me, letting my jaded blogger persona show. Have a good weekend! Get full access to The Alligator Blog at alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe [https://alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Google Maps Erases the California Wildfires | The Alligator News Roundup

Number 4. California Post. Current satellite images of the 2025 Palisades fire damage have disappeared from Google Maps. [https://www.yahoo.com/news/articles/google-maps-slammed-hiding-brutal-174711234.html] When it comes to a major company showing its political colors, mum’s the word. Multiple out-of-control wildfires in California a year ago destroyed 13,000 homes [https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/year-la-area-wildfires-destroyed-thousands-homes-fewer-dozen-rebuilt-rcna252751] and drove some 200,000 residents [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/January_2025_Southern_California_wildfires] to evacuate. Most notable were upscale communities in the Palisades and Altadena. The story dominated news at the time, especially with reports of reservoirs that had been allowed to go dry. Within one year, fewer than a dozen homes had been rebuilt. [https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/year-la-area-wildfires-destroyed-thousands-homes-fewer-dozen-rebuilt-rcna252751] The area remains devasted today. As of this writing, you can easily see the damage in your map app—but only if you are using Apple Maps. Google Maps has inexplicably returned to using pre-2025 satellite imagery. Thus far there has been no statement from Google as to why their current, up-to-date, always-on satellite mapping app suddenly shows images nearly two years out of date. I suppose if you are trying to navigate streets, it might work—assuming you can actually get vehicle access to the burned areas. If on the other hand you are a property tax assessor, it could be a problem. It occurs to me that may be the play: It would be logical that local governments turn to publicly available satellite images to assess property values. I can hardly wait to see the stories of homeowners who lost half-million-dollar properties being billed for homes that no longer exist. The fly in the ointment is, as usual, the free market. While Google has purged the fire history by showing outdated images, Apple Maps continues to show the true devastation of affected neighborhoods. The side-by-side contrast is impressive. These government propagandists all need to get on the same page. Number 3. RedState. Prosecutor held to account for using fake AI case history. [https://redstate.com/sister-toldjah/2026/05/05/hot-takes-ga-supreme-courts-punishment-for-prosecutor-who-cited-fake-cases-has-people-talking-n2202033] A murder trial in Georgia went against the defendant. The guilty party, not surprisingly, appealed the decision, and it went to the Georgia Supreme Court. The state prosecutor composed the state’s response, showing case law that upheld the conviction. At some point, a judge actually read the response and looked up the cases the assistant district attorney cited. He could not find them, because they did not exist. The judge wrote: “…There are at least five citations to cases that don't exist… including three quotations that don't exist…” It turns out that ADA Deborah Leslie had relied on—you guessed it—an AI agent to prepare her case for the legal review. I get it… she was probably overworked, understaffed and underpaid. But when His Honor challenged her in open court, asking if she stood by her written response, it probably left her wishing she had chosen volleyball instead of debate for an extracurricular back in high school. The case was sent back to the lower court and Ms. Leslie was suspended for six months. Some considered [https://x.com/HansMahncke/status/2051684174671605927?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw%7Ctwcamp%5Etweetembed%7Ctwterm%5E2051692637078302841%7Ctwgr%5E69af4fbb063cbdd2d5005d88357e7836c7b6666e%7Ctwcon%5Es3_&ref_url=https%3A%2F%2Fredstate.com%2Fsister-toldjah%2F2026%2F05%2F05%2Fhot-takes-ga-supreme-courts-punishment-for-prosecutor-who-cited-fake-cases-has-people-talking-n2202033] that punishment far too light, considering the stakes of the case. I asked my own ChatGPT agent why attorneys might place such blind trust in the Large Language Model. [https://www.cloudflare.com/learning/ai/what-is-large-language-model/] It gave quite reasonable answers: An LLM understands: * what case citations look like, * how judicial reasoning is structured, * how appellate briefs are written, * how courts quote precedent. The model is not intentionally lying in the human sense. It is statistically predicting what a valid-looking answer should resemble. Try it yourself. Here is the prompt I used: There was a recent Georgia supreme court case tossed bc the ADA relied on an AI agent to write her response to an appeal. A judge found the ADA had cited 5 non-existent cases. This seems like a stupid human mistake, trusting without verifying. What is there about AI responses that make them so believable? ChatGPT’s answer: “The proper mental model for current LLMs is not ‘junior associate’, but rather ‘an extremely articulate intern with a photographic memory, zero shame, and no built-in truth filter.’” Number 2. AOL News. LA mayoral candidate proposes banning backyard BBQ to fight fires. [https://www.aol.com/news/la-mayoral-hopeful-nithya-raman-223334640.html?guccounter=1] Speaking of last year’s California fires, a new proposal has been made to fix the problem: Los Angeles should ban backyard barbecue grills. Current L.A. City Council member Nithya Raman is running for mayor. She believes the solution to devastating fires—likely started by exposed electric lines in areas with excessive and dry ground cover, and exacerbated by high winds—is to stop residents from grilling hamburgers. Daytime temps can reach 100 degrees F in that area, but evenings are generally cool. Many residents prefer to relax in the backyard at the end of the day. Meanwhile, there are a dozen factors [https://www.independent.org/article/2026/01/07/the-2025-los-angeles-wildfires-lessons-and-key-recommendations/] that contributed to the L.A. devastation, none of which involved a backyard barbie. With backlash—who could have predicted that???—Council member Raman has attempted to distance herself from her own proposal. Good luck with that. Perhaps a word or two about clearing brush and seeing that reservoirs are filled might have been in order… but it was probably easier just to write a new city ordinance making it the fault of the residents. “Tone deaf” could be a term used here. Number 1. Breitbart. Campaign promise: Current LA mayor promises new teeth for meth addicts. [https://www.breitbart.com/politics/2026/05/13/nolte-dem-l-a-mayor-karen-bass-proposes-free-teeth-meth-addicts/] Staying with Los Angeles politics, I couldn’t resist this one. Current Mayor Karen Bass—embattled in her bid for re-election—has found a way to appeal to a key constituency. Unfortunate persons addicted to Methamphetamine [https://medlineplus.gov/methamphetamine.html]often suffer from symptoms like dry mouth and broken teeth. Just what I had hoped for in a hobby. Not only does it not pay anything, it leaves me with a mouth of ruined teeth. If Mayor Bass is returned to the Mayor’s mansion, help will soon be on the way. Her proposal is to help unhoused persons with full, free dental care. Because, she says, “You can’t succeed without teeth!” That may be true, but I suspect you also can’t succeed with new teeth and a meth addiction. “Boss, I know the guy’s on meth, but look at that smile! Let’s hire him to run the cash register!” Given that implants run about $6,000 per tooth, costs are estimated at $30-80k per mouth. Given the number of meth addicts who apparently inhabit the City of Angels, this may be an expensive way to purchase a Mayoral election. It’s a good thing the taxpayers will be there to fund it, instead of Mayor Bass herself. And thanks for joining The Alligator News Roundup for Friday, May 22, 2026. Enjoy this spring weather while you can. This weekend should be perfect for a backyard barbeque. Fire up that grill and throw on some steaks—or maybe just hot dogs. But it would be a good idea not to set the lawn on fire. If you are not sure what safety precautions to take (which maybe 200 million Americans [https://www.forbes.com/sites/larryolmsted/2016/04/28/the-united-states-of-barbecue-americas-love-affair-with-backyard-cooking/] have successfully figured out)… maybe you should stick to Ramen noodles in the microwave. Have a good weekend! Get full access to The Alligator Blog at alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe [https://alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Virginia Supremes Are Too Old To Be Effective | The Alligator News Roundup

Number 4. The Daily Caller. Democrat assembly considers plan to fire the Virginia Supreme Court. [https://dailycaller.com/2026/05/11/democrats-reportedly-float-plan-to-boot-entire-virginia-supreme-court-after-losing-redistricting-case/] In the wake of the Virginia Supreme Court decision striking down the statewide referendum on voter redistricting, the Democrat-led Virginia assembly has proposed a bold new plan: Fire the justices. Without getting overmuch into the weeds, Virginia state law requires that a referendum such as was just passed requires a waiting period before it can be put to a vote of the people. That waiting period was ignored, over the objections of the only Democrat in the state who had read their Constitution. I presume the law in question violated 24.2-682 “Times for special elections” [https://law.lis.virginia.gov/vacode/24.2-682/] of the Code of Virginia, which I found on-line in an intensive search requiring about 8 seconds. “A referendum election shall be ordered at least 81 days prior to the date for which the referendum election is called.” In this case, the timeframe allowed was something like 20 minutes. So the obvious answer to this intractable problem is to fire the SCOVA justices—all of them. It is far too tedious to draft a new statute, which itself would require some sort of niggling vote or something. The easy button for vacating the Supreme Court—which the commonwealth must provide, according to that same meddlesome Constitution—is to simply declare the current raft of robed dignitaries who can read ineligible to serve. Current Virginia law requires mandatory retirement for justices at age 75. Just mandate retirement at 54. Problem solved. It will come as no shock to readers of the ANR to learn that the youngest of the seven serving justices [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Supreme_Court_of_Virginia#Active_justices] is 54 and one-fourth years old. At press time, there is a rumor an amendment to the suggested legislation has been proposed, lowering the minimum age of SCOVA justices to 13, along with other mandatory qualifications: Resident of Virginia within 15 miles of Washington, D.C., experienced cannabis user, and displaying no fewer than 6 body piercings. Number 3. RedState. Trump sued for painting the Reflecting Pool “flag blue”. [https://redstate.com/terichristoph/2026/05/11/tclf-sues-to-stop-trumps-reflecting-pool-project-n2202229] President Trump has once again committed one of the foulest acts of treachery ever conceived: he has decided to renovate the historic Reflecting Pool on the Washington Mall. The decision to drain, clean and re-paint the surface of the Pool dishonors the memory of those brave Americans who fought and died so that we could have… a Reflecting Pool subjected to leakage, and plagued with [https://www.cbsnews.com/news/trump-resurfacing-lincoln-memorial-reflecting-pool-blue/?utm_source=chatgpt.com] algae, goose droppings, discarded garbage, and general detritus. But the real problem noted in the lawsuit is that Trump plans to resurface the pool with a bright blue industrial surface. He calls it “American flag blue.” Rumors that the color emits a unique spectroscopic signature that will destroy the lens of Chinese surveillance satellites could not be confirmed. I suspect that even if Trump decided to re-paint the surface in the same non-descript gray that Obama ordered in 2012, there would still be a lawsuit over the renovation. Unidentified sources exclusive to the ANR report that the “flag blue” color was decided on after considering whether it should be a solid color, or should be painted with a design that could be seen from space. Rubio and Vance were in favor of Trump’s 2023 mugshot; Hegseth liked the Butler PA “raised fist” photo. All were overruled by Trump, the coolest head among them. On a financial note, Obama’s renovation cost [https://www.cbsnews.com/news/trump-resurfacing-lincoln-memorial-reflecting-pool-blue/?utm_source=chatgpt.com] $34 million. Trump announced “I got a pool guy” who would do it for $1.8. That cost has since risen to $6.9 [https://www.the-independent.com/news/world/americas/us-politics/trump-reflecting-pool-washington-contract-b2973560.html]. Some press reports indicate [https://www.inquirer.com/news/nation-world/lincoln-memorial-reflecting-pool-repairs-contractor-cost-soars-trump-lawsuit-20260511.html] $13.1. Hard to tell which is true when the reporting comes from sources who appear to hate everything Trump. This week, two guys in white overalls and a Chevy panel van were seen with paint rollers and 5-gallon cans of blue paint, working on the floor of the pool. Number 2. Bearing Arms dot com. New Jersey contradicts itself over guns and ammo. [https://bearingarms.com/camedwards/2026/05/10/new-jerseys-second-amendment-catch-22-n1232478] There is an old story about a farmer who asked to borrow his neighbor’s rope. “No,” said the neighbor, “gotta use it to tie up my milk.” The first man protested. “You can’t use rope to tie up milk.” “That is as it may be,” said the neighbor. “But I ain’t gonna loan you my rope. So one excuse is as good as another.” The State of New Jersey follows apparently similar logic. We don’t want you to have a gun, so any old reason will do. The Garden State has long prohibited citizens from owning what they call assault rifles [https://www.lustberglaw.com/blog/nj-banned-firearms-list/]. This is based on the idea that those are military-style weapons, and no civilian should possess a military firearm, because they are dangerous. Now, they have banned civilian ownership of hollow point bullets. The logic is that hollow points are useless, because those are not widely used by the military. If they were any good, the Army would have them. Police departments have migrated to hollow points because [https://www.thearmorylife.com/the-rationale-for-defensive-hollow-points/] (1) they are less likely to over-penetrate a target, especially important in a heavily populated area, (2) they create a larger wound channel, which promotes more immediate physical incapacity, (3) the risk of ricochet (harming bystanders) is reduced, and (4) they tend to be less lethal because fewer rounds are required to stop the threat. But New Jersey has effectively said: You must not use an asset that is not used by the military, and also you must not use an asset that the military uses. I think I’ve got it. New Jersey does not want you to have a gun. Self-defense is moving back toward edged weapons… like in the good old days. Three hundred years ago, maybe. If you are tall, young, male, and have a long reach, your odds are much better. Number 1. New York Post. Water park party organizer runs a “Learing Center”. [https://nypost.com/2026/05/07/us-news/organizer-of-texas-muslim-only-waterpark-event-runs-a-mispelled-learing-center-childcare-org/] Last week [https://alligatorpublishing.substack.com/p/iranian-navy-enlists-dolphins-as] we brought you word that Epic Waters in Grand Prairie, Texas, planned a “Muslims-only” day at the water park. Attenders were advised that it would be family friendly, that females should dress modestly, that males should “lower their gaze”, and that only Muslims were welcome. After some considerable American outrage, Epic Waters re-published the event as open to all, yet still with a strong Islam-friendly theme. Epic Waters is taxpayer funded. Governor Abbot responded immediately with a threat to withhold state funds from the city of Grand Prairie for allowing such a religiously intolerant exercise. The event was subsequently cancelled. Sara Gonzales from The Blaze interviewed Dr. Aminah Knight, [https://www.thegatewaypundit.com/2026/05/watch-conservative-host-shocks-muslims-only-waterpark-event/] organizer of the event. During the discussion, Dr. Knight was asked about a different initiative she owns. The “Excellence Early Learing Center” offers a multicultural environment with small classrooms for pre-K children. Instructors hold degrees in various fields (accounting, biology, science, math, etc) “from their home countries.” The article does not identify “their home countries.” Being the ace culture detective that I am, I am assembling a set of clues: Dr. Aminah Knight has a name that sounds vaguely not American; Dr. Knight organized an event exclusively for Muslims; Dr. Knight operates an “Early Learing Center” in Texas with misspelling identical to that found in a Somali enterprise in Minnesota. I think I see a pattern emerging. In the interview, Gonzales asked whether misspelling like that should cause anyone to question the quality of the education offered by those degreed instructors. Dr. Knight pushed back: “It was just a typo! I thought we were here to talk about the water park!'“ Which did not precisely answer the question. And thank for joining The Alligator News Roundup for Friday, May 15, 2026. If you are still employed, good for you. Just know that as you reach that advanced age approaching 54 you could be in jeopardy of being forced to retire. Especially if you can read. Have a good weekend! Get full access to The Alligator Blog at alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe [https://alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Iranian Navy Enlists Dolphins as Bio Torpedoes | The Alligator News Roundup

Number 4. Times Now News. Iran straps torpedoes to dolphins to attack US warships. [https://www.timesnownews.com/world/middle-east/sea-creatures-turn-weapons-iran-to-set-loose-mine-carrying-dolphins-against-us-warships-in-hormuz-article-154221766] Iran’s attempts to block the Strait of Hormuz have now turned to the animal kingdom—or more correctly, the sea mammal kingdom. First they used shore-based rockets to attack cargo ships carrying oil. U.S. and Israeli air assets destroyed most of those rocket installations. Then they planted mines in the water. U.S. and NATO mine sweepers cleared those away. Next they resorted to small fast-boats—a longtime favorite of Middle East pirates—only to see them summarily sunk from the air and by surface-to-surface gunfire. Now they have turned to the cetaceans. More than two decades ago, Iran purchased an unspecified number of trained dolphins from what this article refers to as “the Soviet navy.” I thought the Soviets were not a thing by then, but maybe I was wrong about that. Regardless the source, Iranians came into possession of this unique bio-based weapon. Now, they are reportedly unleashing it on U.S. and NATO warships in the Strait. No reports yet on the effectiveness of this new tactic. An Iranian Navy spokesman identified only as “Bob”—which he is quick to assert is not his real name—speaking through an unattributed YouTube upload from an undisclosed location using an incognito browser in an untraceable internet cafe, made this bold proclamation: “The Yankee and Zionist imperialists have finally met their match. There is no path to victory for them in the Strait of Hormuz which Allah gave exclusively to the Iranian people. The dolphins have freely volunteered to give their all to this holy—” At which point the video abruptly dissolved into snow and was replaced with a 404 error message indicating the URL could no longer be reached. In an unrelated event, sources indicated that a U.S. frigate in the Strait had fired a single Tomahawk missile toward the only internet cafe still operational in Tehran. No bomb damage assessment was immediately available. But really, where is PETA? Are they up for this fight? Number 3. RedState. City owned water park in Texas schedules a Muslims only day, then backtracks. [https://redstate.com/bobhoge/2026/05/04/how-is-this-legal-taxpayer-funded-texas-water-park-announces-muslims-only-day-n2202001] The City of Grand Prairie in the Dallas-Fort Worth metroplex has found that the water in their taxpayer-funded water park is hotter than they anticipated. Epic Waters Indoor Waterpark [https://dfwepiceid.com/], 2970 Epic Place, Grand Prairie, Texas, announced a Muslim-only day at the park to celebrate Eid al Adha, the annual Islamic “Feast of the Sacrifice.” Supported by city sales tax, the original flyer advertising the event clearly specified “For Muslims Only—A Family-Friendly Environment.” Presumably it is unfriendly to Christian and Jewish families. That plan lasted for maybe a few minutes, until Texas outrage forced a change in plans. The revised flyer now indicates “Come and Celebrate EID with us! All Are Welcome!” Interestingly, the Epic Waters website [https://dfwepiceid.com/what-to-wear/] suggests appropriate swimwear for the event—head to toe full coverage for females. Their FAQ page [https://dfwepiceid.com/frequently-asked-questions/] also suggests “lowering the gaze” so as to maintain respectful behavior. A few responses to the encouragement to “lower my gaze” at a public waterpark come to mind, none of which are suitable for the ANR. Given the political environment in Texas, I would be surprised if there was not legislative or gubernatorial action to prohibit this sort of exclusivity. By the time you read this, it may already be in motion. Note the growing Islamic influence in local governments around the United States. (This is not satire.) Zohran Mamdani was elected Mayor of our largest city. Daily calls to prayer [https://www.reddit.com/r/JordanPeterson/comments/1q4hd3q/manhattan_new_york_residents_complain_about_5_am/?solution=7dc90cb11bda6bf87dc90cb11bda6bf8&js_challenge=1&token=bbbe4bf1c9a2b5160829c4be34da5861bfbfab5fd7930942dd962c931c1a4a5b&jsc_orig_r=] are now announced by loud speaker in certain areas there. Washington Square Park (NYC) was recently given over [https://dailycitizen.focusonthefamily.com/how-should-christians-respond-to-thousands-of-muslims-praying-in-washington-square-park/]to Islamic public prayer. Epic City (unrelated to Epic Waters) is a planned Muslim community [https://www.jpost.com/international/article-894994] in Texas aiming to become “the epicenter of U.S. Islam”. Months ago, Texas U.S. Representative Chip Roy introduced legislation to curtail the spread of Sharia Law. The bill calls for deportation [https://roy.house.gov/media/press-releases/rep-roy-introduces-bill-preserve-america-sharia-law] of anyone who ascribes to Sharia. It also paves the way to revoke U.S. citizenship [https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/chip-roy-mamdani-act-deport-denaturalize-b2961385.html] for individuals previously naturalized, who now advocate for socialism. Predictably, the Council on American-Islamic Relations (CAIR) has voiced opposition [https://www.cair.com/press_releases/cair-texas-condemns-rep-chip-roys-unconstitutional-no-more-muslims-social-media-post-calls-for-congressional-accountability/]on Constitutional grounds. Free speech, and all that. I never liked Ayn Rand (Atlas Shrugged [https://aynrand.org/novels/atlas-shrugged/]) because of her focus on “Objectivism” to the exclusion of Christian faith. But one of her themes was that you ought not allow someone else to hold you hostage to your own convictions. The Constitutional argument against allowing an Islamic religious takeover of America is an apt illustration. Maybe Texas can show some sense. Number 2. NDTV World. 40,000 French descend on a rave to protest law against raves—despite unexploded ordnance. [https://www.ndtv.com/world-news/40-000-attend-illegal-rave-party-on-french-military-site-bourges-11441700] The French love a party, and the bigger the better. Last weekend some 40,000 revelers descended on a military installation near Bourges (central France) to enjoy techno music and unbridled, joyous dancing. Never mind that the 25,000 acre location is an active bombing range, or that unexploded ordnance litters the landscape. The Directorate General of Armaments indicates live shells are routinely discovered and dismantled at the site. It has been in use for explosives testing for 150 years. Large raves are illegal in France—which is apparently reason enough to have a large rave in protest of the legislation. Organizers have suggested that ravers avoid digging holes or picking up objects found on the ground. No kidding. Good luck with that. Meanwhile, a sea of tents and campers extend as far as the eye can see. Don’t dig a hole in the ground, because it might blow up. I’ll bet sanitation is… a challenge. Number 1. WISN TV 12. Hundreds of beagles released from medical lab testing—and touch grass for the first time. [https://www.wisn.com/article/1500-beagles-rescued-from-ridglan-farms/71188954] Ridglan Farms at Blue Mounds, Wisconsin, is a beagle breeding facility with a research laboratory attached. For years it has attracted unwanted attention from animal rights groups. Beagles, because they are docile (and can’t complain to the media), make ideal candidates for medical testing, as long as you can’t hear them whine. Reports [https://animalwellnessaction.org/ridglan-farms-running-inhumane-beagle-breeding-facility/]of “painful surgeries without anesthesia” have surfaced. A Depression-era agreement required animal testing of all new human drug treatments. That has proceeded at Ridglan Farms for nearly a century. FDA guidelines in the last five years have made such testing obsolete. It is now understood to be inhumane—which it is. A better word might be reprehensible. Testing has nevertheless continued, and now the USDA has intervened. Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., HHS Secretary, has been instrumental in stopping federal funding [https://spectrumnews1.com/wi/milwaukee/news/2026/04/29/ridglan-farms-dogs-animals] for beagle testing there. This week, the first release of beagles took place. Some 150 were rescued by local animal rights groups pursuant to a legal agreement. Video footage [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPGxujWcQqQ] shows scores of Snoopies who were able to touch grass and run freely for the first time in their lives. I really can’t go on with this story. The pictures on my monitor are getting blurry. And thanks for joining The Alligator News Roundup for Friday, May 8, 2026. It is a complex world in which we live. The less clear we are about our worldview, the more confusing it is. If you are contemplating your own worldview—which we used to a “philosophy of life”—you might consider starting with a few simple words, such as: In the beginning, God created the heavens and the earth. And go from there. While you’re at it, find a beagle to pet. Have a good weekend! Get full access to The Alligator Blog at alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe [https://alligatorpublishing.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]