The Bull and the Badger

407 – Brothers

In what may have been the hottest summer on record, Chris, Julie and I sweated it out in a hotel room, talking about brothers. Chris goes in depth into his life before and after his brother’s sudden passing, the impact of The Laundromat on his current relationships, and just how many video game he played growing up. Julie doesn’t sit back either–she prods, adds, and for some reason, gives multiple shout-outs to her sister who is NOT in the audience. This episode is a long ‘un but if you’ve ever wondered what Chris from my doc is up to now or how to grow out from under someone’s long shadow, keep listening! EPISODE NOTES Recorded in 2017, mild spoilers for GOT sprinkled throughout SOUND ENGINEER Vanessa Yee POST SOUND EDITOR AND MIXER Karolina Esqueda, Vanessa Yee COMPOSER Deborah Lee Proaño   Episode 407 – Brothers [https://bbmp3.s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com/Season4/BullBadgerPod_407.mp3]

406 – Happily Ever After?

When you survive the worst of high school, oftentimes you gain needed allies in the fight ahead. That ally for The Bull & The Badger was none other than Danielle Colayco, and the worst of high school was apparently AP Bio. Just like in this podcast, we got through it with laughter, tears, and lots of conversation. Danielle shares about surviving post-partum depression, an already tough experience that coincided with the passing of her father. She doesn’t hold back the details on some of the toughest moments of her life. Danielle was then and is now a hero to The Bull & The Badger for her vulnerability, openness and courage. (And just as importantly her amazing memory for AP Bio facts and humor.) Please enjoy this episode with one of our favorite humans. EPISODE NOTES: -Recorded in 2016 -Suicide hotline number: 1-800-273-8255 (also online chat available) SOUND ENGINEER Vanessa Yee POST SOUND EDITOR AND MIXER Karolina Esqueda COMPOSER Deborah Lee Proaño Special Thanks: Mr. Wilkes Episode 406 – Happily Ever After? [https://bbmp3.s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com/Season4/BullBadgerPod_406.mp3] **Post episode message from DC** [This is] to anyone listening who may be experiencing some of what we’ve talked about. I myself was in denial of my symptoms, which started in the hospital 1-2 days after giving birth. I was crying uncontrollably, and the nurse asked me “is it the pain?” (I had a C-section) and I was too ashamed to say that I was feeling sad (who feels sad after having a baby?) so I lied and said yes. So they increased the dose of my pain medication. It’s much easier to complain of physical pain than emotional pain, because there’s no stigma associated with physical symptoms. They also administered a depression screening questionnaire in the hospital and I lied on that too, because I was afraid they’d call someone in for a psych consult– which is exactly what I needed, but I was terrified at the time. I didn’t want to be associated with the women in the news who drown their babies in the bathtub or drive themselves and their kids over a cliff [note: most of these cases are actually driven by psychosis, which also occurs but is much more rare than depression/anxiety]. People hear those stories and immediately demonize the mothers, not realizing that as humans, we all have the capacity to go to dark places. But it doesn’t have to get to that point if you get treated. So be honest with yourself. Not everyone feels happy after giving birth. It’s not always like in the movies when the mother immediately starts weeping with joy upon seeing her baby. And cut yourself some slack. You’ve just endured 10 months of pregnancy, followed by the trauma of childbirth. And then you need to stay awake 24/7 to feed and care for a helpless newborn. It’s enough to send most people to their edge, and a great many of us will go beyond that edge. You’re not alone, and you don’t have to hide it. Don’t try to tough it out yourself. Get help, because the good news is that it’s treatable.

405 – Online Dating

The Bull & The Badger swim in the emotionally treacherous but equally exciting waters of Online Dating for a special episode recorded on the road. If you’ve ever wondered, “Am I doing this right?” You are not alone. April gives insight from her own experiences while Vanessa ponders some commonplace questions that you didn’t want to voice aloud for their commonplace-ishness. Learn something new or nod along to the saga that is…online dating!!! NOTE: Episode recorded in 2017 SOUND ENGINEER Vanessa Yee POST SOUND EDITOR AND MIXER Karolina Esqueda COMPOSER Deborah Lee Proaño Special Thanks: TRW   Episode 405 — Online Dating [https://bbmp3.s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com/Season4/BullBadgerPod_405.mp3]

404 – Race and Allyship

A year ago the Badger sat down with Dom and Minh to rain down her questions–where do Asian Americans fit into the more black&white binary race discussions in America? Do labels around race and class and other categories create more harm than good? How do I support other minorities if I don’t feel like I can speak for them? Many of the questions asked then about cultural and political identity, sensitive race conversations, and the ideas of allyship vs. privilege are still questions we’re grappling with today. Listen in as this week’s guests answer with grace, humor and a tremendous amount of humility. SOUND EQUIPMENT SPECIALIST John Nobori, Independent Sound Designer/Mixer/Composer COMPOSER Deborah Lee Proaño ENGINEER, POST SOUND EDITOR AND MIXER Vanessa Yee Special Thanks to 2nd Eyes: BK CLS   Episode 404 — Race and Allyship with Dom & Minh [https://s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com/bbmp3/Season4/BullBadgerPod_404.mp3]

403 – Vulnerability (with John Nobori)

April and John dredge up embarrassing moments in their personal histories in this exploration of vulnerability. Why is it so hard and yet so important to let ourselves be vulnerable? Grunt and squeak along with the Bull and the Butterfly! SOUND EQUIPMENT SPECIALISTS John Nobori, Independent Sound Designer/Mixer/Composer COMPOSER Deborah Lee Proaño POST SOUND EDITOR AND MIXER John Nobori Link [https://s3-us-west-2.amazonaws.com/bbmp3/Season4/BullBadgerPod_403.mp3]