The One Leadership Quality Everyone Gets Wrong with Denise Mokadsi

The One Leadership Quality Everyone Gets Wrong with Denise Mokadsi

This episode of the Leaders of Influence podcast features Denise Mokadsi, a Melbourne-based integrative health practitioner and belief transformation coach who works with midlife women on energy, clarity, and confidence. The conversation centers on influence as the often-invisible forces, external (like social media, family, society) and internal (beliefs, values, meanings) that shape how we think and act. Denise emphasizes that the true power of influence lies in how much meaning we assign to experiences and how consciously we choose what to let affect us, especially in relation to our core values. She also highlights the darker side of influence as manipulation, in which people may be persuaded to act against their values in exchange for validation, success, or material rewards, unless they remain aware of and aligned with what they truly believe. Takeaways: Influence starts internally, not externally – The impact any person, platform, or situation has on us is determined by the meaning we assign to it and how consciously we choose to let it affect us. Life direction is shaped by who we let influence us – Especially when younger and less self-confident, we may over-rely on respected figures (like parents) and pursue paths that fit their view of our strengths rather than our true passions.   Quotes: "The amount of influence that something or someone has on us is only going to be determined by the level of our experience or meaning we give that interaction with someone or something."   Timeline: 0:00 – Opening Reflection on Influence & Leadership 1:13 – Podcast Introduction & Guest Bio 5:46 – The Role of Beliefs in Influence 8:47 – Trading Values for Validation or Success 10:26 – Influence, Values, and Leadership Integrity 13:27 – Returning to Teaching and Coaching 17:23 – The Puzzle Piece Metaphor 23:41 – Belief, Trauma Work, and a Turning Point 24:34 – From Wheelchair to Dancer 28:05 – Leadership and Influence: Why Leaders Matter 32:46 – Borrowing a Leader’s Confidence 33:45 – Host’s Appreciation and Closing on Leadership 34:29 – From Science to Nursing to Education   Conclusion:  Denise shows that influence isn’t something we chase outside ourselves, but something we consciously reclaim from within. By becoming aware of the meanings we attach to experiences and how those meanings shape our values, health choices, and leadership, we regain agency over our direction in life. Her stories, from being steered by others’ expectations to helping her son transform a devastating diagnosis into a dancing future, underline the power of curiosity, self-trust, and aligned action. Listeners are left with a clear invitation: know your values, trust your inner signals, and choose your influences deliberately so you can lead yourself and others with integrity.

Former NRL Star Brent Tate On Staying Mentally Strong After Devastating Injuries

Brent reflects on how his lifelong love of rugby league began in childhood, when his mum signed him up to channel his energy, and how the game shaped his identity, friendships, and career. He and the host explore the idea that influence is primarily about daily behaviors and setting an example, especially for children, teammates, and colleagues, rather than just words or status. Brent also speaks candidly about the pressures of professional sport, the physical toll of repeated serious injuries, and how his resilience and self-talk were tests of character he refused to fail, with support from influential mentors like Wayne Bennett, Craig Bellamy, Mick Devere, and his brother-in-law Steve Price.   Takeaways:    1. Influence is behavior, not title Influence shows up in what you consistently do—your routines, discipline, and how you treat people—more than in what you say or the position you hold. Kids, teammates, and colleagues “watch” you more than they “listen” to you. 2. Resilience is a daily test of character Brent viewed his serious injuries as tests of character he refused to fail. Through self-talk, self-motivation, and disciplined action (showing up to rehab, doing the hard work), he kept coming back, building his “willpower muscle” over time. 3. Great leadership creates belief and clarity Coaches like Wayne Bennett, Ivan Cleary, and Paul Green influenced Brent through structure, clear roles, high standards, and genuine care. Strong leaders give people confidence, clear expectations, and a standard of excellence that lifts performance and culture.   Quotes:   1. On willpower and resilience “Willpower, it's like they say, it's a muscle, the more you use it, the stronger it gets.” Description: Brent sums up his philosophy on resilience here—treating willpower as something you train every day, especially through rehab and setbacks, not something you either “have” or “don’t have.” 2. On what influence really is “When I think about influence, it's behaviors, and people observe and watch behaviors… that's the biggest influence of all, how you act and the behaviors that you display on a daily basis.” Description: This captures the core theme of the episode: influence isn’t about titles or speeches, it’s about the small, consistent actions others see you take. 3. On discipline, standards, and culture “When people talk about culture, culture’s behaviors at the end of the day… if you've got good standards and good behaviors, well, you've got a great culture.” Description: Brent boils “culture” down to something practical and controllable—everyday standards and behaviors—making it highly applicable for both sports teams and organizations.   Timeline: 0:00 – Brent on injuries & self-talk Using setbacks as tests of character, daily self-talk, willpower as a muscle. 1:00 – Podcast intro & Brent’s career highlights Anton introduces the Leaders of Influence / Find Your Influence podcast and runs through Brent’s NRL, Origin, and Test career. 4:00 – How Brent fell in love with rugby league Childhood memory in Toowoomba, mum signing him up, watching Bulldogs vs Wests, and never looking back. 5:40 – Rugby league shaping character and behavior Mum threatening to take league away, behavior turnaround, how the sport set him on a better path. 6:00 – What rugby league has given (and taken) him Friendship circles, providing for family, joy of watching footy, and acknowledging the physical costs. 8:20 – Defining influence: behaviors over words Influence as daily behavior, routines, fitness, and how kids and colleagues copy what you do (“monkey see, monkey do”). 10:30 – Key influences and mentors Wayne Bennett, Craig Bellamy, Mick Devere’s professionalism, and being deliberately paired with disciplined role models. 11:50 – Family influence: Steve Price and support network Emotional reflection on his brother-in-law Steve Price, the importance of good people in your corner. 13:20 – The pressure cooker of professional sport Public scrutiny, constant pressure (e.g., Reece Walsh), and the “rope off the chest” feeling when he retired. 16:00 – The magic of the Maroons jersey What it feels like to run out for Queensland, deep emotional connection to Origin and Suncorp. 17:40 – Injuries, pain, and long-term impact Lasting knee issues, being unable to run, and the physical toll of a long NRL career. 18:20 – Comebacks, mindset, and inner drive Doctors and physios helping, but why the hard work must come from within; seeing rehab as a test of character. 20:00 – Self-influence and mental strength Daily self-talk, self-reassurance, discipline to do the work, and strengthening willpower over time. 21:00 – Stepping into leadership at the Warriors Craving a leadership role, Ivan Cleary pushing him to “find your voice,” calling out soft options. 23:20 – Leadership, confidence, and readiness Moving from being ready to lead to actually speaking up and influencing the group. 23:50 – Senior leadership and parenting as leadership Leadership groups at Warriors and Cowboys; parallels between parenting and leadership. 25:45 – Lessons from great coaches Wayne Bennett’s “better humans make better footballers,” Paul Green’s standards and excellence, and structure and routine. 27:05 – Culture = behaviors and standards Simple definition of culture: daily behavior when people walk through the door; the standards and behaviors that drive performance. 29:10 – Hard work, discomfort, and reward Discipline, early mornings, extra work, and the idea that “nothing worth getting comes easy.” 30:55 – Life after footy and corporate ambitions Enjoying the corporate world, board role at the Cowboys, Fox commentary, and wanting to keep making an impact. 32:00 – Staying connected to the game & media Why staying connected eases retirement, pros and cons of media, and rugby league as entertainment and constant storylines. 33:50 – Host’s recap of influence and leadership themes Anton summarizes Brent’s story, early influences, resilience, leadership lessons, and staying connected to the game. 37:30 – Brent’s closing motivational thoughts Willpower as a muscle, controlling what you can control, and the quotes he lives by. 38:10 – Episode close & call to action Anton’s outro: subscribe, share, and mention of the Leaders of Influence book and framework.   Conclusion:    Brent Tate’s story illustrating how influence, resilience, and discipline play out in real life—not as abstract ideas, but through daily choices. From his mum’s decision to sign him up for rugby league, to mentors like Wayne Bennett, Ivan Cleary, Paul Green, and Steve Price, Brent shows that the right people and standards around you can shape your character and career. His perspective that “willpower is like a muscle” and that culture is simply “behaviors and standards” offers a clear, practical blueprint for leaders in sport, business, and at home. Ultimately, Brent’s journey—from an injured player constantly fighting back to a corporate leader, board member, and commentator—reinforces that nothing truly worth having comes easily, and that we each have more control than we think over the person and leader we become.

Why Great Leaders Don't Need to Control People with Gen Dohrmann

Gen Dohrmann, CEO of Table Tennis Victoria, shares her journey into sports leadership, explaining how a background in communications and marketing across multiple sports led her to her current role. She describes the recent overhaul of table tennis membership structures in Australia, expanding beyond simple “social” and “competitive” categories to better reflect different levels of play and introducing a free “fan and fun” membership to capture the many informal players outside the formal system. Gen emphasizes that influence for her is rooted in clear communication and getting genuine buy‑in so others come on the journey with her, especially when balancing the needs of traditional members and new participants. She highlights key influencers in her own career, particularly former CEO Jamie Parsons, mentor Carol from Women’s Sport Australia, and her parents, and how they encouraged her leadership aspirations and board involvement at a relatively young age. Now, Gen is focused on “handing the ladder down” by mentoring younger professionals (especially women in sport), sharing her story publicly, modeling flexible leadership as a part‑time job‑share CEO and mother, and contributing to the Global Institute of Sport advisory board to help grow pathways into sports careers. Takeaways: Influence is built on clear, honest communication. Gen sees influence as getting genuine buy‑in by communicating the vision, strategy, and reasoning behind decisions so people feel part of the journey, even when changes are unpopular. Female leadership in sport needs visibility and pathways. Her drive to lead was sparked by seeing too few women applying for CEO roles in female‑dominant sports, and mentors like Jamie and Carol helped her step into board and executive positions earlier than she thought possible.   Quotes: On influence and communication "Influence is so important to be able to do what you do and do it well. You need to have the buy-in of others, and I think that communication plays such a key role in this." On women stepping into leadership "That for me was like a lightning bolt of like, okay, well that's not good enough; like, females can do this job, and a female sport should be represented by a female at the helm."   Timeline: 0:00 Updated membership model at Table Tennis Victoria 1:25 Leaders of Influence podcast intro 2:15 Introducing CEO Gen Dohrmann 3:54 Gen reacts to her bio and sets the scene 4:40 What influence means to Jen as a leader 6:14 Gen’s career journey into sports administration 8:55 Deciding to pursue CEO roles and female leadership 10:25 Balancing traditional members and new participants 11:14 Detailed breakdown of the new membership categories 17:00 How Gen pays it forward and supports her team 19:46 Being a mum, job-share CEO, and female leader in sport 20:06 Never saying no to a coffee and helping early‑career talent 24:19 Building pathways into sports careers 25:42 The most important character trait of a good leader 26:02 Empathetic leadership versus old-school authoritarian styles 27:18 Leading by example at tournaments and “all hands on deck” 28:18 Communicating hard decisions with transparency 29:18 Real-life example: cutting and reinstating prize money 31:14 Making prize money fair and equitable for women 32:14 Call for sponsors and supporting community table tennis 32:31 Wrapping Gen’s impact on women’s sport 33:19 Can you make a living playing table tennis? 34:35 Pathways, overseas competition, and Brisbane 2032 34:51 Role of Table Tennis Australia and home Olympics opportunity 35:38 Future talent and excitement for a home Games 36:14 Host’s recap of Gen’s leadership and influence 38:05 Gen’s closing quote: “Those that need to know, know” 39:04 Podcast outro and call to action for listeners   Conclusions: Gen Dohrmann’s story is a powerful example of how modern leadership in sport is built on empathy, clarity, and a genuine commitment to lifting others. From reshaping Table Tennis Victoria’s membership model to better reflect how Australians actually play, to challenging the status quo on female leadership and board representation, she shows that influence is less about titles and more about how effectively you communicate, include, and develop people. Guided by mentors and now mentoring others, Gen “hands the ladder down” to the next generation of women in sport while proving that flexible, family-friendly leadership at CEO level is not only possible but highly effective. Her journey underscores that when leaders are transparent in tough calls, willing to get hands-on with their teams, and intentional about creating pathways, they don’t just grow a sport—they change its culture.

The Biggest Mistake Parents Make About Academic Success with Melissa Williams

Melissa Williams, an award-winning global authority on adult learning, joins leadership expert Anton Guinea to explore how true influence is built through learning. Melissa shares her journey from believing she was “dumb” at school to becoming CEO of a successful learning organization, thanks to discovering the FORMAT model and her own learning preferences. Together, they unpack the difference between influence and manipulation, the power of intent, and why creating a love of learning is one of the greatest gifts a leader, parent, or educator can give. They break down the four learning preferences—why, what, how, and what if—and show how designing for all of them transforms engagement, confidence, and results. The conversation also dives into psychological safety, handling mistakes, and practical ways leaders can build cultures where people feel supported in learning, growing, and taking risks.   Takeaways: 1. Influence vs. Manipulation Comes Down to Intent Influence and manipulation can look similar on the surface—both change how people think or act—but the key difference is the intent behind them. Leaders must constantly check their motives and use their power responsibly. 2. Learning Works Best When You Honor Different Preferences Melissa’s use of the FORMAT model (why, what, how, what if) shows that people learn in different ways and sequences. When leaders, trainers, and parents design conversations, meetings, or training to touch all four, engagement and retention go up dramatically. 3. Psychological Safety Fuels Growth and Performance A powerful leadership move is to respond to mistakes with “What happened?” and “How can I support you?” rather than blame. This builds trust, encourages risk‑taking, and creates a culture where people feel safe learning, experimenting, and improving. Quotes: "The only difference between manipulation and influence is intent." Description: Melissa highlights that what truly separates healthy influence from manipulation isn’t the tools or techniques, but the motive behind them. "Learning is simply the making of meaning, and meaning is always personal." Description: She reframes learning as a deeply individual process of connecting new information to past experience, which explains why the same lesson lands differently for different people. "If a leader can actually encourage their people to embrace learning through authentically doing it themselves, then you come together as a team whilst you're leading, whilst you're growing." Description: Melissa underlines that the best leaders role‑model learning, turning growth into a shared team journey rather than a top‑down directive.   Timeline: 00:00 – Opening: Melissa’s view on learning vs. grades 00:53 – Show intro and Melissa’s background and awards 05:03 – Growing up “dumb” and discovering the FORMAT model 08:56 – Definition of influence and intent vs. manipulation 10:54 – Authenticity, mistakes, and learning like riding a bike 16:45 – The four FORMAT learning preferences (why, what, how, what if) 20:09 – Brain, VAK styles, and how we code learning visually 23:37 – Learning as “the making of meaning” 25:44 – Who influenced Melissa and seeing herself in adult learners 30:12 – Pebble in the pond: the ripple effect of teachers and leaders 35:12 – “Bouncy boys,” non‑judgment, and respecting learning preferences 40:04 – Melissa’s definition of leadership and psychological safety 43:34 – Two culture‑shaping questions: “What happened?” and “How can I support you?” 44:55 – Parenting, leadership, and learning as a lifelong gift   Conclusion:   Melissa Williams leaves us with a powerful reminder that learning is less about grades and more about meaning, confidence, and possibility. When leaders, teachers, and parents understand how people learn—and design experiences that honor different learning preferences—they don’t just transfer knowledge; they ignite potential. Influence, as Melissa frames it, is about intent and about artfully guiding others to see and act differently without ever stripping away their agency. And leadership at its best creates a safe space for people to say, “I stuffed up,” and still feel supported in growing. If there’s one takeaway to carry forward, it’s this: when you commit to your own learning and create spaces where others can safely learn, experiment, and make meaning, your impact ripples far beyond what you’ll ever see.

The Storytelling Secret Every Brand Misses with Gabrielle Dolan

Leadership coach Anton Guinea interviews storytelling expert Gabrielle Dolan about how storytelling functions as a core leadership and influence skill, not a “nice to have.” Gabrielle explains that stories make messages “sticky” by creating emotional connection and long-term memory, drawing on examples from First Nations cultures, safety storytelling, and her work in change management and values communication. She outlines a simple framework—be crystal clear about your message, choose a personal story, keep it tight (60–90 seconds) with a clear beginning–middle–end, and finish with an inviting, reflective close rather than a moral. Through stories about leaders she’s coached (including a once-skeptical CFO and a values-driven “touch the wall” moment), she shows how sharing authentic and even vulnerable experiences humanizes leaders, builds trust and credibility, and brings organizational values like “doing the right thing” to life in day-to-day decisions.   Takeaways:   1. Stories make messages “sticky.” Storytelling creates emotional connection and locks ideas into long-term memory, which is why people remember stories from a presentation or tour long after they’ve forgotten the facts and figures. 2. Leadership, influence, and values live in stories, not slogans. You can’t meaningfully communicate values like “doing the right thing” or “safety first” with posters and bullet points alone—concrete stories (like the “go back and touch the wall” example) show what those values look like in real decisions. 3. A simple story structure beats polished slides. Be crystal clear on your message, choose a short (60–90 second) often-personal story, start with time and place, give it a clear beginning–middle–end, and end with a reflective question or thought rather than “the moral of the story is…”   Quotes:   "Get into the habit of saying, would a story help me communicate this more effectively?" Description: Gabrielle encourages leaders to make storytelling a default consideration whenever they need to deliver an important message, whether at work or at home. "Stories make your messages sticky." Description: This captures Gabrielle’s core point that stories help people actually remember and act on what you say, unlike standalone data or bullet points. "Leadership is a verb, it's not a noun, and it is certainly not a title." Description: Gabrielle’s definition of leadership emphasizes action and influence over role or status, aligning with her view that anyone can display leadership through how they show up and communicate.   Timeline:   00:00 – Storytelling as a leadership skill 00:55 – Anton’s intro and Gabrielle’s bio 03:35 – Why Anton invited Gabrielle on the show 03:57 – What influence means to Gabrielle 05:29 – Discovering storytelling in change management 06:05 – Why humans are wired for stories 07:22 – Emotion, memory, and “sticky” messages 10:03 – Storytelling as a learnable leadership skill 10:49 – PowerPoint vs. stories 12:24 – Gabrielle’s simple story framework 15:18 – How to start and end a story well 16:47 – Who influenced Gabrielle most 18:55 – Early resistance to storytelling in business 21:33 – The skeptical CFO who became a CEO 23:07 – Vulnerable storytelling and brand change 26:19 – Learning from others’ failures 28:33 – Safety culture and “safety shares” 29:52 – You can’t communicate values without stories 30:53 – Values, behaviors, and lived examples 33:08 – The “go back and touch the wall” story 36:25 – Using stories to guide real decisions 37:09 – What leadership means to Gabrielle 38:37 – Leadership as a verb, not a title 40:53 – A non-example of leadership in action 43:26 – Anton’s wrap-up and key lessons   Conclusion:   Gabrielle Dolan shows that storytelling isn’t a soft extra for leaders but a core tool for influence, culture, and values in action. By making stories short, clear, and often personal, leaders can turn abstract ideas—like safety, integrity, and “doing the right thing”—into vivid moments people remember and act on. When leadership is treated as a verb, not a title, the stories leaders choose to tell (and live) become the most powerful way they earn trust, shape behavior, and create lasting impact.