The Lesbian Breakup Podcast

Our Top 5 Lesbian Awakenings, Ranked

Welcome to episode 9 of The Lesbian Breakup Podcast. [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/s/the-lesbian-breakup-podcast] This week, after emotionally detonating ourselves in last episode’s grief spiral [https://substack.com/@zarabarrie/note/p-196548814?utm_source=notes-share-action&r=2ozyqa], we decided to offer both you AND ourselves a tiny reprieve. So naturally, we did the only logical thing: rank the formative gay experiences that turned us into lesbians. From Cleopatra to Gia, summer camp intensity to devastating dark friendship betrayals, France to suburban America, Elina and Zara each reveal the top five moments that made us realize, in increasingly dramatic fashion, “Oh. I’m not straight at ALL.” Then, because we are deeply unwell and extremely opinionated list-lovers, we *merge* our lists together into one definitive shared Top 5 Lesbian Awakenings ranking. This episode is funny, nostalgic, slightly heartbreaking, deeply revealing, and painfully earnest in the way only youth can be. A chaotic little trip down memory lane full of yearning, cinematic gay drama, and baby lesbian confusion. Come feel it all with us! Available on ALL platforms. Get full access to MASCARA LESBIAN at zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

What Is Grief Privilege?

Co-hosts Elina Street [https://substack.com/profile/14190821-elina-street] and Zara Barrie [https://substack.com/profile/162921106-zara-barrie] are *finally* back together and feeling it all… What happens when grief becomes a privilege? On this week’s episode, recorded on Zara’s 40th birthday [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/p/forty-finally], we get deep on grief, loss, and the unexpected clarity that comes after everything burns down. Zara opens up about what it meant to be a full-time caretaker for her mother, the surreal “business of death” that nobody warns you about, and why the silence after loss can feel both terrifying and like the first real breath you’ve taken in months. We talk about grief brain, the friends who show up and the ones who don’t, and why giving people space is not always the gift you think it is. We also get into grief privilege; the idea that knowing loss lets you into a different playground entirely, one where things that used to matter suddenly don’t, and the things that do matter become unshakeable. Whether you’re navigating a breakup, losing a parent, processing a friendship that fell apart, or just trying to find yourself on the other side of something hard — this one is for you. Grab a tissue, and know that you are not alone, and remember to feel it all. Crying is sexy. Every other Tuesday. We love you and thank you so dearly for your support. AVAILABLE ON SUBSTACK, [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/s/the-lesbian-breakup-podcast] SPOTIFY [https://open.spotify.com/show/1XRAsDKFDl97PlXJ8tSbrk?si=f5e223f306af4611], AND APPLE PODS. [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-lesbian-breakup-podcast/id1872192055] Get full access to MASCARA LESBIAN at zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

10 Ways To Avoid A Bad Lesbian Breakup

In this raw, unfiltered episode, Emmy-winning director and co-host Elina opens up about navigating rejection (professional and romantic), writing a love letter that never arrived, and why she’s still hung up on someone she probably shouldn’t be. But this isn’t a spiral, it’s a Virgo’s dream, a well thought-out list that will especially help if you’re currently healing from a situationship. Elina breaks down her 10 Rules for Avoiding a Bad Lesbian Breakup: from situationships that were never actually casual, to why saying “I love you” too soon is an oxytocin trap, to the one question she now asks herself before tolerating anything — would I let a friend get away with this? Plus: the bag of rice theory of relationships, why first impressions are everything, and what it actually means to own yourself on a Friday night. Zara is dearly missed — we will be back together very soon. 🎙️ All are welcome. Because no one understands heartbreak like a lesbian. Get full access to MASCARA LESBIAN at zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Hanging On By A Thread

This week, we’re breaking the format. It’s your Lesbian Breakup Podcast cohost, Zara Barrie [https://substack.com/profile/162921106-zara-barrie] and I’m going solo for an intimate, no-filter episode. But *don’t* worry, the brilliant and enigmatic Elina Street [https://substack.com/profile/14190821-elina-street] will be back next week. In this episode, I open up about what it’s been like caretaking for my mother [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/p/i-will-fall-apart-soon-but-not-now]in the final stages of hospice, and how living this close to loss has completely reshaped the way I think about love, heartbreak, and what actually matters in this crazy, whirlwind life. I answer your questions about relationships and breakups, share the most iconic advice my mother has passed down to me (that I’m so honored to pass down to you), and reflect on the haphazard, complicated, VERY human ways we survive the most harrowing chapters of our lives. I’m talking growth—real growth—the kind that’s not pretty or “aesthetic.” The kind of evolution that’s non-linear, complicated, and f*cking messy. I’m talking about letting go of victim mentality and turning our pain into our purpose. And yes, of course, I wax poetic about my own slew of screw-ups in love, life, and sex. I’m grieving. I’m raw. I’m not sugarcoating a damn thing. This is the realest you’ll ever get me, darlings. If you’re in the mood for something intimate, unpolished, and RAW—this one is for you. Support our Substacks: The Lesbian Bar Project [https://substack.com/profile/423884913-the-lesbian-bar-project] + MASCARA LESBIAN [https://open.substack.com/pub/zarabarrie] Get full access to MASCARA LESBIAN at zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]

Do Lesbians Have Enough Sex?

This week, Zara Barrie and Elina Street take you on a wild adventure into the glittery institutions that raised us: the lesbian bars of New York and Los Angeles. From Zara sneaking into The Abbey at 18 in full Lindsay Lohan cosplay to Elina walking alone into Cubbyhole and getting waterboarded by a blunt New Jersey lesbian asking, “What’s your deal?”—this episode is a true love letter to the spaces that cracked us open and unearthed the lesbian within. We get into why sapphic sex is rarely casual (if you cum, you’re at high-risk of booking a cross-continental flight), the ~oxytocin spiral~ that turns a random hookup into a fantastical love story, and how much easier (and boring) life is when you don’t orgasm. We talk about toppy aggressive femmes, power bottoms, twin f*ckers, and the jarring whiplash of realizing your type might not be attracted to the type that is you. Topics include: • First lesbian bar experiences (LA vs NYC) • Attraction, rejection and type theory • Queer self-esteem, style and identity Want more? Check out The Lesbian Bar Project [https://thelesbianbarproject.substack.com/?utm_campaign=profile_chips] and Mascara Lesbian [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/]on Substack. Be sure to follow us on Instagram: @lesbianbreakuppod [https://www.instagram.com/lesbianbreakuppod/] @zarabarrie [https://www.instagram.com/zarabarrie/] @elinastreet [https://www.instagram.com/elinastreet/] @lesbianbarproject [https://www.instagram.com/lesbianbarproject/] Get full access to MASCARA LESBIAN at zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe [https://zarabarrie.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_4]