When Breastfeeding Support Actually Hurts!
We all know social support matters, but what does it actually look like? And why do well-meaning friends, partners, and even healthcare providers sometimes make things worse?
In this episode of The Science Chick Report, Dr. Kathleen Kendall-Tackett digs into the science of social support, what it actually means, how it's measured, and why good intentions aren't enough. Drawing on research spanning decades, she reveals that the most powerful predictor of breastfeeding success isn't technique or education, it's responsiveness: support that listens to what the mother needs, respects her decisions, and builds her confidence rather than creating dependency.
Dr. Kendall-Tackett walks through the major sources of support new mothers encounter, partners, grandmothers, peer groups, lactation consultants, and healthcare providers with candid, research backed insights into where each falls short and how each can be most effective. She shares a striking study showing that mothers with extensive social networks had a 94 percent breastfeeding rate at two months, while those whose partners or grandmothers fed the baby instead had only a 13 percent rate. She also unpacks why fathers who feel helpless or invisible often push for bottle feeding, and what we can do about it.
Tune in to discover why even the most skilled clinician won't be right for every mother, how peer support groups can be lifelines or breeding grounds for mom competition, and what truly effective breastfeeding support looks and feels like.
In This Episode:
* [00:00] Introduction to social support
* [00:01] Defining effective support
* [00:04] Sources of social support
* [00:05] The importance of partner support
* [00:09] A UK study on support networks
* [00:12] Fathers' perspectives on breastfeeding
* [00:13] How partners can help
* [00:15] The role of grandmothers
* [00:16] Mother-to-mother support groups
* [00:19] Navigating social media
* [00:20] Lactation consultants' role
* [00:22] Healthcare provider support
* [00:25] Finding the right breastfeeding supporter
* [00:26] What successful support looks like
Notable Quotes:
* [03:45] "Even if well-intentioned, even if it worked for other people, if the mother does not think it's support, it's not support." — Dr. Kathleen Kendall-Tackett
* [05:50] "The most important type of support was responsiveness — sensitive to her needs, respects her decisions, and promotes self-efficacy." — Dr. Kathleen Kendall-Tackett
* [08:02] "With responsiveness, the women felt understood and cared for. Without it, practical support left them not self-sufficient — and encouragement felt like coercion." — Dr. Kathleen Kendall-Tackett
* [11:35] "When you provide support by having others feed the baby, breastfeeding rates plummet — just plummet." — Dr. Kathleen Kendall-Tackett
* [07:46] "When partners offered knowledge, help, and encouragement without responsiveness, breastfeeding duration actually decreased." — Dr. Kathleen Kendall-Tackett
* [26:37] "You hear about all the problems with breastfeeding, but what they don't tell you about is how nice it is. It's like you're in your own little love bubble." — Mother, quoted by Dr. Kathleen Kendall-Tackett
* [20:40] "If everybody who came in contact with a mother and a baby could evaluate the latch and whether the baby is drinking at the breast, I think we would avert so many tragedies." — Jack Newman, quoted by Dr. Kathleen Kendall-Tackett
Resources and Links
Podcast
* The Science Chick Report
Dr. Kathleen Kendall-Tackett
* Website [https://kathleenkendall-tackett.com/]
* LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/kathleen-kendall-tackett-3b506a8/]
* X [https://x.com/UptySciChick]
* Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/kathleen.kendalltackett]
* ResearchGate (upcoming paper) [https://www.researchgate.net/profile/Kathleen-Kendall-Tackett-2]
Mentioned in This Episode
* When Helping Hurts – Steve Corbett & Brian Fikkert
* Research on partner responsiveness and breastfeeding outcomes
* Lori Feldman-Winter's survey of pediatricians on breastfeeding attitudes (1995 & 2016)
* Jack Newman on latch evaluation and staffing ratios
* WIC peer support programs
* La Leche League International