Imposter Syndrome Lies, Your Voice Speaks the Truth | Barbara McAfee TEDx Speaker

Imposter Syndrome Lies, Your Voice Speaks the Truth | Barbara McAfee TEDx Speaker

What if the voice you use every day is the same one keeping you from who you're becoming? That inner critic, the one that wakes up before you do, tells you you're not qualified, not experienced, not enough, it's using your voice. And here's the part most leaders miss: so is the version of you that knows exactly who you are. Imposter syndrome and your fullest, most authentic self are running on the same instrument. The question isn't whether you have a voice. It's which one you're letting speak. In this conversation, master voice coach, singer, author, and TEDx speaker, Barbara McAfee explains why the truth lives in your belly, not your head, and why your tone of voice will always reveal what your words are trying to hide. Drawing on over three decades of coaching leaders, Barbara breaks down how emotional intelligence and executive presence are not about speaking louder or commanding more authority. They're about getting your outer voice, your inner voice, and your identity aligned. We explore the shadow work that happens when you stop performing and start expressing, what it means when Barbara says "the shadow is going to speak," and why the people who struggle most with authentic leadership are often the ones carrying immense gifts they've never been able to voice. She walks us through the five elements of vocal expression, earth, fire, water, metal, and air, and reveals why expanding your vocal range expands your sense of who you are, and what becomes possible. This is not a conversation about public speaking tips. It's about what happens when you stop editing yourself, stop managing the impression you're making, and let the voice you actually have say what it actually knows. Barbara's central thesis, “you can't change your voice without your life coming along for the ride,” lands as both a warning and an invitation. If you've ever felt like your communication isn't landing the way you think it is, or you've wondered why the same inner critic that fuels your imposter syndrome sounds nothing like the leader you know you're becoming, this conversation will show you what's actually at stake. In this episode, Barbara answers the following questions: - How can I find my voice? - How to Overcome Imposter Syndrome? - How do I fix my inner critic? - What does a voice coach do? Resources mentioned in the episode: -  Barbara’s Web site [https://www.barbaramcafee.com/] -  Barbara’s Most Recent Book, “Vocal Intelligence, Leading with Vitality, Presence, and Impact [https://bookshop.org/p/books/vocal-intelligence-leading-with-vitality-presence-and-impact-barbara-mcafee/d7b6df5d69ba9bb6?ean=9781722507381&next=t]”  - Brain Rats Video [https://www.youtube.com/watch?reload=9&v=ZOuzuMx9wP4 ] Music in this episode by Amplify Music. What Do You Know To Be True?" is an invitation for those who are in the middle of a mid-career reinvention, attempting to pivot from the old version of you, into one that is more aligned with purpose and values, and becoming more of your possible self. These conversations are with leaders who have been at that pivot point, who’ve navigated the messy middle, and now creating more meaning in the world through their work. Want more info about What Do You Know To Be True? ➡️ Check out the What Do you Know To Be True? [https://whatdoyouknowtobetrue.com/] site ➡️ Subscribe to the What Do You Know To Be True? newsletter [https://rogerkastner.substack.com/ ] to get insights into each conversation.  "What Do You Know To Be True?" is hosted by Roger Kastner, is a production of Three Blue Pens, and is recorded on the ancestral lands of the Duwamish and Suquamish people. To discover the ancestral lands of the indigenous people whose land you may be on, go to: https://native-land.ca/   Keywords #ImposterSyndrome #InnerVoice #ShadowWork #EmotionalIntelligence #ExecutivePresence #ToneOfVoice #AuthenticLeadership #BarbaraMcAfee #FindYourVoice #PersonalGrowth

Why Your Best Employees Are Underperforming | Nervous System Regulation | Sharon Podobnik Peterson

In the workplace, Sharon Podobnik Peterson said a trauma response looks like patterns of connection turned into patterns of protection. That one sentence is the spine of trauma informed leadership and what can happen without nervous system regulation. It names why you can walk into a meeting perfectly prepared and still feel your nervous system hijack the room. It explains why defensiveness isn't a personality flaw, it's a signal that safety left the conversation before you even noticed. And it reframes nervous system regulation not as a wellness buzzword but as the actual infrastructure of effective leadership. Sharon is the founder of The Center for Conscious Leadership and the creator of the Trauma Informed Leader program. In this episode, she walks us through what happens when a room full of nervous systems becomes its own collective organism and why co-regulation is the leadership skill nobody taught you. We explore the window of tolerance, what polyvagal theory looks like in real time (not in a textbook), and how to spot when someone across from you has shifted from connection into protection without either of you naming it. We also get into something Sharon calls the un-ripened tomato effect. It's her metaphor for how organizations pluck emerging leaders too early, teach them to perform executive presence without building the nervous system capacity underneath, and then wonder why emotional regulation crumbles under pressure and emotional resilience never takes root. If you have ever been told to fake it until you make it and felt your body keeping score the whole time, this part of the conversation will land. This conversation is about recognizing that stress management and psychological safety start inside your own system before they ever show up in relation with colleagues. You'll leave with a clearer sense of what high functioning anxiety actually costs, how to attune to the regulational field in any room you walk into, and why leading well might come down to how willing you are to stay in connection when everything in you wants to protect. In this episode, Sharon answers the following questions: - What is trauma? - What is trauma informed leadership? - How to not activate a trauma response in others? - How to regulate my nervous system? Resources mentioned in the episode: - Sharon’s LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/sharonpodobnik/] - The Center for Conscious Leadership [https://www.thecenterforconsciousleadership.com/ ] Chapters 0:00 What Is Trauma-Informed Leadership? 3:56 Defining Trauma: When Nervous System Regulation Fails 5:21 The Three Lenses of Trauma-Informed Leadership 8:47 Co-Regulation: How Leaders Create Nervous System Safety 13:54 Psychological Safety: Am I Safe? Do I Matter? Am I Loved? 17:00 Burnout Symptoms: The Unripened Tomato Leadership Metaphor 20:29 Holding Space: Sharon's Origin Story & Superpower 36:09 Imposter Syndrome: The Cost of Looking the Part 41:46 Leadership Development As Public Health & Well-Being Requirement What Do You Know To Be True?" is an invitation to be inspired to become more of your possible self by discovering your superpower, unlocking your potential, and creating your impact in the world. This podcast is for leaders, coaches, org development practitioners, and anyone who works with people who want to be inspired to discover their superpower, unlock their possibilities, and make meaningful impact in the world. Want more info about What Do You Know To Be True? ➡️ Go to What Do You Know To Be True? Podcast Home [https://whatdoyouknowtobetrue.com/] ➡️ Subscribe to the What Do You Know To Be True? newsletter [https://rogerkastner.substack.com/ ]to get insights into each conversation "What Do You Know To Be True?" is hosted by Roger Kastner, is a production of Three Blue Pens, and is recorded on the ancestral lands of the Duwamish and Suquamish people. To discover the ancestral lands of the indigenous people whose land you may be on, go to: https://native-land.ca/  Keywords #nervoussystemregulation #traumainformedleadership #psychologicalsafety #emotionalregulation #consciousleadership #impostersyndrome #emotionalresilience #burnoutsymptoms #stressmanagement #coregulation

The Midlife Reinvention You’re Afraid To Make | Adaptability Coach Sylvia Taylor

What if the midlife reinvention you keep postponing isn't waiting for more data or a better plan, it's waiting for you to trust your gut again? For many professionals like you, career reinvention feels too big to trust your intuition and instead let the big decisions be made by spreadsheets, pros-and-cons lists, and taking the safe route of certainty. Sylvia Taylor calls that inner signal "the sparkle." As an "adapt-ologist" who has navigated career changes across marketing, organizational development, and agile leadership, Sylvia discovered early that her most significant career pivots were never purely logical. They were intuitive. She followed what lit her up, even when the path made no sense on paper. In this conversation, you will learn: ➡️ How to answer "Who am I beyond my job title?" without spiraling ➡️ Why your gut may be more trustworthy than your brain when considering a career reinvention  ➡️ The difference between hope as a feeling and hope as a daily practice  ➡️ Why hope is an amplifier for adaptability and resilience ================= Want more info about What Do You Know To Be True? ➡️ Check out the channel: What Do You Know To Be True? [https://whatdoyouknowtobetrue.com/] ➡️ Subscribe to the What Do You Know To Be True? newsletter to get insights into each conversation: https://rogerkastner.substack.com/ [https://rogerkastner.substack.com/] ================= In this conversation, Sylvia introduces the Adaptive Identity Game, a play-based tool she designed to answer the question that surfaces during every midlife reinvention: "If I'm not my job title, who am I?" The answer, she insists, isn't found by updating your LinkedIn profile. It's uncovered by reconnecting with the skills, traits, and metaphors that have been quietly shaping your work all along. Sylvia shares the tool she created, the Adaptive Identity Game, a play-based tool she designed to answer the question that surfaces during every midlife reinvention: "If I'm not my job title, who am I?" The answer, she insists, isn't found by updating your LinkedIn profile. It's uncovered by reconnecting with the skills, traits, and metaphors that have been quietly shaping your work all along. In this episode, Sylvia answers the following questions: ➡️ What does reinvent your career mean? ➡️ How can I follow my intuition? ➡️ How accurate are gut feelings? ➡️ How to be more adaptable? My favorite quote from the episode:   "Live the questions now. Perhaps then, someday far in the future, you will gradually, without even noticing it, live your way into the answer." -Rainer Maria Rilke, from "Letters to a Young Poet" Resources mentioned in the episode: ➡️ Sylvia's Adaptive Identity Game [https://adaptiveidentitygame.com/] Music in this episode by Ian Kastner. What Do You Know To Be True?" is an invitation to be inspired to become more of your possible self by discovering your superpower, unlocking your potential, and creating your impact in the world. This podcast is for leaders, coaches, org development practitioners, and anyone who works with people who want to be inspired to discover their superpower, unlock their possibilities, and make meaningful impact in the world. For more info, check out the channel: What Do You Know To Be True? [https://whatdoyouknowtobetrue.com/] "What Do You Know To Be True?" is hosted by Roger Kastner, is a production of Three Blue Pens, and is recorded on the ancestral lands of the Duwamish and Suquamish people. To discover the ancestral lands of the indigenous people whose land you may be on, go to: https://native-land.ca/ [https://native-land.ca/] #Midlifereinvention #CareerReinvention #TrustYourIntuition #Adaptability #Hope #PersonalGrowth #leadershipdevelopment #CareerChange

Difficult Conversations - Your Questions on Relational Capacity | Author & TEDx Speaker

In this episode, psychotherapist, author, and TEDx speaker, Kerry-Lyn Stanton-Downes, returns to be relational and answer real questions about applying relational capacity to difficult conversations, provide respectful candor in ways that heals not harms, and create emotional co-regulation in the moments that matter most. In the original conversation, Kerry-Lyn shared the 8 principles of relational capacity and offered to come back to answer audience-provided questions. This is that episode! Four audience members sent in specific questions and Kerry-Lyn’s responses went deeper than theory. The questions: ➡️ How can leaders use relational capacity to improve emotional co-regulation? ➡️ How do you address someone's dysregulation with compassion? ➡️ How do other cultures develop relational capacity that we can learn from? ➡️ Is the choice between being right and staying in relationship actually a false one? Thank you, Mark Meadows, Wynne Leon, and April McCormick for the questions! Her answer to the last question revealed something I didn't expect. Kerry-Lyn identifies the early warning signal we all recognize but rarely name: the moment "but, but, but" enters your internal dialogue, you've left relational curiosity behind. The fix isn't trying harder to convince the other person. It's admitting your own defensiveness out loud, what she calls respectful candor. That single move to vulnerability disarms the entire dynamic and invites both people back to what they're really in service of. Throughout this conversation, from ubuntu and whakapapa, from leader vulnerability to emotional co-regulation, you'll hear her eight principles of relational capacity surface naturally; not because she's reciting a model, but because she's so deeply embedded in the work that it's become how she sees. If you've ever walked away from a difficult conversation wondering if you could have held your ground and held the relationship, this episode was made for you. *** Don't miss another episode with amazing guests - subscribe here: https://www.youtube.com/@WDYKTBT?sub_confirmation=1 *** Resources mentioned in the episode: ➡️ Kerry-Lyn’s Company: https://www.berelational.co.uk/ ➡️ Kerry-Lyn’s LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kerry-lyn-stanton-downes ➡️ Kerry-Lyn’s Substack: https://berelationalnow.substack.com/ Music in this episode by Ian Kastner. What Do You Know To Be True?" is an invitation to be inspired to become more of your possible self by discovering your superpower, unlocking your potential, and creating your impact in the world. This podcast is for leaders, coaches, org development practitioners, and anyone who works with people who want to be inspired to discover their superpower, unlock their possibilities, and make meaningful impact in the world. Want more info about What Do You Know To Be True? ➡️ More episodes and info: https://whatdoyouknowtobetrue.com/ [https://whatdoyouknowtobetrue.com/]  ➡️ Subscribe to the What Do You Know To Be True? newsletter to get insights into each conversation: https://rogerkastner.substack.com/   "What Do You Know To Be True?" is hosted by Roger Kastner, is a production of Three Blue Pens, and is recorded on the ancestral lands of the Duwamish and Suquamish people. To discover the ancestral lands of the indigenous people whose land you may be on, go to: https://native-land.ca/  Keywords #difficultconversations #relationalcapacity #respectfulcandor #emotionalregulation #vulnerabilityleadership #coregulation

Difficult Conversations Build Stronger Teams | Colonel DeDe Halfhill

Most leaders know when something is off with their team but they steer clear of the difficult conversation. They sense the tension and the confusion, but they lack the courageous leadership and emotional intelligence to say the thing that everyone wants to hear. building. And the team and results suffer. Retired U.S. Air Force Colonel DeDe Halfhill says that silence is the single most expensive habit in leadership today, and it's costing leaders the very thing they're working hardest to build. In this conversation, Roger Kastner sits down with DeDe Halfhill, retired US Air Force Colonel, former advisor to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff and now a Leadership Advisor and Speaker, to explore why difficult conversations are not a soft skill, but a high-performance discipline. From Iraq to the boardrooms of corporate America, DeDe's message is the same: the leaders who build the strongest teams are the ones willing to say the thing nobody else will say. In this episode you'll discover: ➡️ Why the leaders who "do hard things" are often the ones most afraid to have the hard conversation ➡️ How acknowledging the emotional reality of your team builds more trust than any strategy session ➡️ The moment DeDe realized in Iraq that speaking the truth of a shared experience changes everything ➡️ How psychological safety and difficult conversations are two sides of the same leadership coin Colonel DeDe Halfhill retired from the U.S. Air Force after 25 years of service, including a deployment to Iraq and an advisory role to the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff. She now works with organizations and leaders to develop the emotional intelligence and courageous leadership skills that drive real team performance because she's seen firsthand what happens when leaders choose courage over comfort, and what it costs when they don't. If you've ever sensed something was wrong with your team but stayed quiet to avoid the discomfort this conversation is the permission slip you didn't know you needed. The difficult conversation isn't the risk. Avoiding it is.   Resources mentioned in the episode: ➡️DeDe’s Website [https://dedehalfhill.com/] ➡️DeDe’s LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/dedehalfhill/] Music in this episode by Ian Kastner. "What Do You Know To Be True?" is an invitation to be inspired to become more of your possible self by discovering your superpower, unlocking your potential, and creating your impact in the world. This podcast is for leaders, coaches, org development practitioners, and anyone who works with people who want to be inspired to discover their superpower, unlock their possibilities, and make meaningful impact in the world. Want more info about What Do You Know To Be True? ➡️ Check out What Do You Know To Be True? [https://whatdoyouknowtobetrue.com/] ➡️ Subscribe to the What Do You Know To Be True? newsletter [https://rogerkastner.substack.com/ ] to get insights into each conversation. "What Do You Know To Be True?" is hosted by Roger Kastner, is a production of Three Blue Pens, and is recorded on the ancestral lands of the Duwamish and Suquamish people. To discover the ancestral lands of the indigenous people whose land you may be on, go to: https://native-land.ca/ [https://native-land.ca/] Keywords #difficultconversations #courageousleadership #emotionalintelligence #psychologicalsafety #leadershipdevelopment