Why Being Liked Isn't the Same as Being Loved (And How to Stop Confusing Them)

Disappointing Others, and Being Okay With It

Do you say yes when you want to say no, just to avoid disappointing someone? In this episode of Brave Moves, Julie DeLucca-Collins tackles one of the hardest skills for high-achieving women to build: being okay with disappointing other people. Julie walks through Don Miguel Ruiz's bestselling book The Four Agreements, applying each agreement — be impeccable with your word, don't take anything personally, don't make assumptions, and always do your best — directly to the fear of letting people down. She unpacks why someone else's disappointment is information about them, not a verdict on your worth, and why most people-pleasing is fueled by assumptions about reactions that haven't even happened yet. This episode offers a practical, values-based reframing for anyone who has conflated people-pleasing with integrity and wants to build the confidence to disappoint others without losing themselves in the process. In this episode: * Why saying yes to avoid disappointment breaks your word to yourself * The Four Agreements, applied to people-pleasing and self-worth * Why someone else's disappointment isn't about your value * How assumptions fuel pre-emptive people-pleasing * Redefining "doing your best" as the only standard that matters * This week's Brave Move + free Thought Leadership Assessment Get the Book: The Four Agreements [https://a.co/d/04KRCx5l] If you loved this episode, text me and let me know what you though. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/support] Join the Community [https://www.skool.com/confident-you-rawconversations-4533/about] Brave Moves is a daily confidence and personal growth podcast for ambitious women, women entrepreneurs, and leaders who are ready to overcome self-doubt, build resilience, and take bold action in business and life. Each short, practical episode blends mindset science, decision-making psychology, and real-life stories to help you strengthen your confidence, rewire negative thought patterns, and create meaningful forward momentum. If you are navigating career pivots, burnout, reinvention, or leadership growth, Brave Moves gives you the tools to think differently, act bravely, and design a future aligned with your values and vision. Because confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build, one brave move at a time. Liked this episode? Share it with your midlife woman, entrepreneur friends! Love this show? Let us know how we helped you increase your confidence by leaving a review. For more about me and what I do, check out my website [https://goconfidentlycoaching.com/]. If you’re looking for support to grow your business faster, be positioned as an authority in your industry, and impact the masses, schedule a call [https://calendly.com/goconfidentlycoaching/coaching-call] to explore if you’d be a good fit for one of my coaching programs. Fo...

How to Stop Second-Guessing Every Decision You Make

Do you make a decision, then immediately start Googling alternatives, rereading reviews, or asking one more friend for reassurance? In this episode of Brave Moves, Julie DeLucca-Collins tackles second-guessing head-on — and makes the case that the fix isn't more research, it's more trust. Julie breaks down five practical, actionable strategies to stop the second-guessing cycle for good: the 10-10-10 Rule for gaining perspective on any decision, practicing fast low-stakes decisions to build your decisiveness muscle, a "no backtracking" rule for decisions already made, how to tell the difference between healthy reflection and anxious doubt, and how keeping a simple "win tracker" builds real, objective self-trust over time. This episode is a practical toolkit for anyone who wants to build decision confidence and stop losing opportunities to endless deliberation. In this episode: * Why more research doesn't fix second-guessing * The 10-10-10 Rule for decision-making * How to train your brain to decide quickly * The "no backtracking" rule * Reflection vs. anxious doubt — how to tell the difference * Why a win tracker builds real self-trust * This week's Brave Move + free Thought Leadership Assessment My final wallpaper choice [https://a.co/d/02zi1EqU] If you loved this episode, text me and let me know what you though. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/support] Join the Community [https://www.skool.com/confident-you-rawconversations-4533/about] Brave Moves is a daily confidence and personal growth podcast for ambitious women, women entrepreneurs, and leaders who are ready to overcome self-doubt, build resilience, and take bold action in business and life. Each short, practical episode blends mindset science, decision-making psychology, and real-life stories to help you strengthen your confidence, rewire negative thought patterns, and create meaningful forward momentum. If you are navigating career pivots, burnout, reinvention, or leadership growth, Brave Moves gives you the tools to think differently, act bravely, and design a future aligned with your values and vision. Because confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build, one brave move at a time. Liked this episode? Share it with your midlife woman, entrepreneur friends! Love this show? Let us know how we helped you increase your confidence by leaving a review. For more about me and what I do, check out my website [https://goconfidentlycoaching.com/]. If you’re looking for support to grow your business faster, be positioned as an authority in your industry, and impact the masses, schedule a call [https://calendly.com/goconfidentlycoaching/coaching-call] to explore if you’d be a good fit for one of my coaching programs. Fo...

Be-Good vs. Get-Better: What Succeed by Heidi Grant Halvorson Teaches About Goals

Are you setting goals to prove you're good enough — or to actually get better? In this episode of Brave Moves, Julie DeLucca-Collins breaks down a key distinction from Heidi Grant Halvorson's book Succeed: How We Can Reach Our Goals: the difference between "be-good" goals and "get-better" goals, and why that one choice quietly determines whether you give up the moment things get hard. Julie unpacks Halvorson's research on goal setting and motivation, showing how proving-yourself goals collapse under pressure while growth-focused goals hold steady — and connects this to Carol Dweck's research on fixed versus growth mindset. This episode offers a practical, research-backed reframing for anyone stuck chasing external validation rather than real progress. In this episode: * The difference between be-good goals and get-better goals * What happens to each mindset when obstacles show up * Why proving-yourself goals are exhausting and unstable * The link to Carol Dweck's fixed vs. growth mindset research * How to set specific, achievable goals that actually motivate you * This week's Brave Move + free Thought Leadership Assessment Get the book: SUCCEED: HOW WE CAN REACH OUR GOALS [https://a.co/d/0dkrIOAk] If you loved this episode, text me and let me know what you though. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/support] Join the Community [https://www.skool.com/confident-you-rawconversations-4533/about] Brave Moves is a daily confidence and personal growth podcast for ambitious women, women entrepreneurs, and leaders who are ready to overcome self-doubt, build resilience, and take bold action in business and life. Each short, practical episode blends mindset science, decision-making psychology, and real-life stories to help you strengthen your confidence, rewire negative thought patterns, and create meaningful forward momentum. If you are navigating career pivots, burnout, reinvention, or leadership growth, Brave Moves gives you the tools to think differently, act bravely, and design a future aligned with your values and vision. Because confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build, one brave move at a time. Liked this episode? Share it with your midlife woman, entrepreneur friends! Love this show? Let us know how we helped you increase your confidence by leaving a review. For more about me and what I do, check out my website [https://goconfidentlycoaching.com/]. If you’re looking for support to grow your business faster, be positioned as an authority in your industry, and impact the masses, schedule a call [https://calendly.com/goconfidentlycoaching/coaching-call] to explore if you’d be a good fit for one of my coaching programs. Fo...

My Dear Friend, Sister Lucilla | She Would Not Believe My Life Now

In this deeply personal episode of Brave Moves, Julie DeLucca-Collins honors the memory of her dear friend, Sister Lucilla, a nun who passed away in 2009 after a life devoted to faith, service, and joy, and reflects on everything Sister Lucilla never got to see. Julie shares how their friendship began when she was newly 30 and new to New York, and how Sister Lucilla, nurse, teacher, gardener, seamstress, and pre-Vatican II nun — became one of the most treasured relationships of her life. Seventeen years later, Julie reflects on what Sister Lucilla would think of the life she's built since: the book, the TEDx stage, this very podcast. This episode is a celebration of a friendship that still quietly shapes everything Julie does. In this episode: * Julie's friendship with Sister Lucilla, who passed in 2009 * A life of faith, service, and joyful defiance of age * What Sister Lucilla would think of Julie's life today * This week's Brave Move: naming the people who shaped you, even years later If you loved this episode, text me and let me know what you though. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/support] Join the Community [https://www.skool.com/confident-you-rawconversations-4533/about] Brave Moves is a daily confidence and personal growth podcast for ambitious women, women entrepreneurs, and leaders who are ready to overcome self-doubt, build resilience, and take bold action in business and life. Each short, practical episode blends mindset science, decision-making psychology, and real-life stories to help you strengthen your confidence, rewire negative thought patterns, and create meaningful forward momentum. If you are navigating career pivots, burnout, reinvention, or leadership growth, Brave Moves gives you the tools to think differently, act bravely, and design a future aligned with your values and vision. Because confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build, one brave move at a time. Liked this episode? Share it with your midlife woman, entrepreneur friends! Love this show? Let us know how we helped you increase your confidence by leaving a review. For more about me and what I do, check out my website [https://goconfidentlycoaching.com/]. If you’re looking for support to grow your business faster, be positioned as an authority in your industry, and impact the masses, schedule a call [https://calendly.com/goconfidentlycoaching/coaching-call] to explore if you’d be a good fit for one of my coaching programs. Fo...

The Perfectionism Trap | Why "Perfect" Is Never Actually About You

Are you trying to behave in a certain way to maximize outside approval? In this episode of Brave Moves, Julie DeLucca-Collins unpacks why perfectionism isn't a high standard — it's a rejection of your true self, and a symptom of chasing an outside standard instead of trusting the inner perfection that already exists within you. Julie breaks down the difference between the perfectionist voice, obsessed with how things look to others, and the self-trusting voice, guided by inner authenticity and self-worth. She explores why striving for outer perfection is a recipe for misery and powerlessness, how perfectionism quietly spreads to our expectations of those around us, and what it actually looks like to live a self-directed life rather than an approval-driven one. If you've ever felt like nothing you do is ever quite enough, this episode offers a research-informed, deeply practical reframe on perfectionism, self-worth, and authenticity,  plus a free tool to help you find where outer-approval perfectionism might be shrinking your voice. In this episode: * Why perfectionism is an outside standard, not a high standard * The link between perfectionism and authenticity * Two internal voices: outer approval vs. inner trust * Why perfectionism leads to misery and powerlessness * How perfectionism spreads to the people around you * Moving from approval-driven to self-directed living * This week's Brave Move + free Thought Leadership Assessment [https://goconfidentlyservices.myflodesk.com/tlvagapaudit] If you loved this episode, text me and let me know what you though. [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2542996/support] Join the Community [https://www.skool.com/confident-you-rawconversations-4533/about] Brave Moves is a daily confidence and personal growth podcast for ambitious women, women entrepreneurs, and leaders who are ready to overcome self-doubt, build resilience, and take bold action in business and life. Each short, practical episode blends mindset science, decision-making psychology, and real-life stories to help you strengthen your confidence, rewire negative thought patterns, and create meaningful forward momentum. If you are navigating career pivots, burnout, reinvention, or leadership growth, Brave Moves gives you the tools to think differently, act bravely, and design a future aligned with your values and vision. Because confidence isn’t something you’re born with. It’s something you build, one brave move at a time. Liked this episode? Share it with your midlife woman, entrepreneur friends! Love this show? Let us know how we helped you increase your confidence by leaving a review. For more about me and what I do, check out my website [https://goconfidentlycoaching.com/]. If you’re looking for support to grow your business faster, be positioned as an authority in your industry, and impact the masses, schedule a call [https://calendly.com/goconfidentlycoaching/coaching-call] to explore if you’d be a good fit for one of my coaching programs. Fo...