The Mental Health Janitors

How to Take Back Control of Your Mind (Stop Negative Self Talk)

19 min · 1 de may de 2026
Portada del episodio How to Take Back Control of Your Mind (Stop Negative Self Talk)

Descripción

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/fan_mail/new] If you feel stuck in life, constantly doubting yourself, or replaying the same negative thoughts over and over, this episode is for you. In this episode of The Mental Health Janitors, Aaron “Sgt Q” Quinonez sits down with Paul, a men’s mental health coach, to break down how your identity, self worth, and life direction are often shaped by voices that were never yours to begin with. You will learn how people unknowingly live by beliefs formed by family, society, and past experiences, and why those patterns lead to self sabotage, feeling not enough, and staying stuck. Paul shares his personal journey of struggling with identity, shame, and expectations, and how he learned to take back control by changing the internal narrative. This episode also explores why negative self talk feels so real, how the brain gets stuck in repeating patterns, and how one simple question can begin to shift everything. You will learn how to respond differently to your thoughts, how to open up new possibilities, and how small daily practices can start to rewire the way you think and live. The goal is not to silence your thoughts, but to take control of which ones you follow. Watch if you are searching for • How to stop negative self talk • How to take control of your mind • How to stop self sabotage • Men’s mental health support • How to rebuild self worth Timestamps 00:00 - Welcome to The Mental Health Janitors 01:10 - Paul’s Story and Identity Struggles 02:50 - How Labels Shape Self Worth 04:30 - Society’s Influence on Your Inner Voice 06:10 - Why People Feel Not Good Enough 08:00 - Understanding Self Sabotage Patterns 10:00 - Whose Voice Are You Listening To 12:00 - The Question That Changes Your Thinking 14:20 - Rewiring Your Mind and Breaking Patterns 16:30 - The 7 Day Practice and Next Steps 🎁 Free Resource from Paul If this conversation resonates with you and you are ready to take back control of your thoughts and break free from negative patterns, Paul is offering a simple 7 day guided practice to help you shift your internal narrative and create new possibilities for your life. 👉 Get started here: https://firstonesfree.com/ Be part of our online family where faith meets mental health, and honest conversations with your spouse turn struggles into growth. Find practical strategies, real testimonies, and truth that doesn’t flinch. 🔗 Join our community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/ Listen on: 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c 🎧 Website: https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/ 🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/ Connect with Aaron “Sgt Q” Quinonez: Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13 LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitytvstarpodcaster/ Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/sgt.q_/ Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/support]

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157 episodios

Portada del episodio The Relationship Red Flag Every Parent Should Know

The Relationship Red Flag Every Parent Should Know

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/fan_mail/new] Would you step in if helping someone you love created even more conflict?  In this episode of Mental Health Janitors, Sgt Q and Doc Jess unpack a viral Reddit story that sparks a much bigger conversation about parenting, family boundaries, responsibility, and emotional maturity. When a father repairs his adult daughter's unsafe car after her boyfriend fails to follow through, one simple act of love raises difficult questions. When should parents step in? Where do healthy boundaries begin? And how do pride and ego influence the way we respond? From family dynamics and healthy relationships to accountability and emotional intelligence, this episode explores what it truly means to protect the people you love without losing sight of respect and responsibility. If you've ever struggled with family boundaries, wondered when to step in, or questioned what real responsibility looks like, this conversation is for you. 🎧 Tune in to discover why this story is about far more than fixing a car, and how the lessons behind it can strengthen families and relationships. Episode Highlights: 00:00 Welcome to Mental Health Janitors 03:26 Seeing America Through a Different Perspective 14:03 The Reddit Story That Started the Conversation 19:44 Did Dad Cross the Line? 23:11 Responsibility vs Pride 31:58 Parenting Through Difficult Decisions 36:31 Educate, Empower, and Encourage Join the Conversation Be part of a growing community having real conversations about mental health, relationships, emotional intelligence, trauma, and personal responsibility. 🔗 Join our community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/ [https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/] Listen on: 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c [https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c]🎧 Website: https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/ [https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/]🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/ [https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/] Connect with Aaron “Sgt Q” Quinonez: Website: https://sgtq.net/ [https://sgtq.net/]Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13 [https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13]LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitystarpodcaster/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitystarpodcaster/] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/support]

Ayer30 min
Portada del episodio The Quiet Damage of Pride in Relationships, Parenting, and Communication

The Quiet Damage of Pride in Relationships, Parenting, and Communication

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/fan_mail/new] Why is it so hard to admit we're wrong? 💭 In this episode of Mental Health Janitors, Sgt Q and Doc Jess unpack a viral Reddit story that sparks a much bigger conversation about pride, accountability, parenting, and emotional growth. What happens when we're confronted with undeniable proof that we made a mistake? Why do so many people become defensive instead of taking ownership? And what lessons do our children learn when they never see us apologize? From family dynamics and relationship conflict to trauma responses and emotional intelligence, this episode explores the hidden cost of letting pride take the driver's seat. If you've ever struggled to say "I was wrong," found yourself explaining instead of apologizing, or wondered why accountability feels so uncomfortable, this conversation is for you. 🎧 Tune in to learn how genuine apologies build trust, why ownership matters more than excuses, and how small moments of accountability can transform relationships. Episode Highlights: 00:00 Welcome to Mental Health Janitors 03:12 The Reddit Story That Started the Conversation 08:45 Why Pride Makes Accountability So Difficult 13:20 Should Parents Apologize to Their Kids? 18:34 Explanations vs Excuses 24:10 Trauma Responses and Emotional Reactions 29:47 The Power of a Simple Apology 35:18 How Accountability Strengthens Relationships 40:05 Taking Ownership and Moving Forward Join the Conversation Be part of a growing community having real conversations about mental health, relationships, emotional intelligence, trauma, and personal responsibility. 🔗 Join our community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/ [https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/] Listen on: 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c [https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c]🎧 Website: https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/ [https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/]🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/ [https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/] Connect with Aaron “Sgt Q” Quinonez: Website: https://sgtq.net/ [https://sgtq.net/]Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13 [https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13]LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitystarpodcaster/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitystarpodcaster/] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/support]

23 de jun de 202629 min
Portada del episodio Are You Showing Up or Just Showing Off? The Truth About Ego in Relationships

Are You Showing Up or Just Showing Off? The Truth About Ego in Relationships

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/fan_mail/new] Most relationships don’t fall apart because of big dramatic events. They fall apart in small moments where ego shows up, priorities get misaligned, and one person stops considering the experience of the other. In this powerful episode of Mental Health Janitors, Sgt Q and Dr Jess break down a viral Reddit story that starts with a simple date night, Bruno Mars tickets, a planned dinner, and a special evening together, but quickly spirals into conflict over something as small as a steak. What unfolds is a deeper conversation about emotional intelligence, selfish decision making, and what it really means to create shared experiences in a relationship. They explore how stress, excuses, and personal comfort can quietly override connection, and why “good intentions” are not enough when your actions tell a different story. From ego-driven decisions to emotional memory and relationship damage, this episode reveals how one moment of self-focus can undo an entire experience you thought you were building together. If you’ve ever wondered why small disagreements turn into big disconnects in relationships, this conversation will make you rethink how you show up for the people you care about. 🎧 Tune in now. It’s not about the steak or the concert it’s about what happens when you stop making it about “us” and start making it about “me.” Episode Highlights: 00:00 - Welcome to Mental Health Janitors 02:36 - The “Concert vs Steak” Reddit Story Begins 05:01 - When Excuses Show Up in Relationships 06:35 - “Why does she even care about the opener?” 08:58 - How Personal Comfort Overrides Shared Experience 11:21 - Emotional Connection & Neuro Pathways in Relationships 13:20 - The Power of Negative Emotional Memory 15:07 - Accountability vs Justifying Behavior 17:11 - Why Intentions Don’t Matter Without Action Join the Conversation Be part of a growing community having real conversations about mental health, relationships, emotional intelligence, trauma, and personal responsibility. 🔗 Join our community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/ [https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/] Listen on: 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c [https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c]🎧 Website: https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/ [https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/]🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/ [https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/] Connect with Aaron “Sgt Q” Quinonez: Website: https://sgtq.net/ [https://sgtq.net/]Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13 [https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13]LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitystarpodcaster/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitystarpodcaster/] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/support]

16 de jun de 202622 min
Portada del episodio The Marriage Mirror: Why Changing Yourself Changes Your Relationship

The Marriage Mirror: Why Changing Yourself Changes Your Relationship

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/fan_mail/new] 🎁 Free Resource from Doc Jess If this conversation resonates with you and you want practical tools to strengthen your marriage by focusing on personal growth first, Doc Jess is offering a free marriage assessment and relationship resource to help you identify areas for growth and build a stronger foundation. 👉 Get started here: https://firstonesfree.com/ [https://firstonesfree.com/] If you feel stuck in the same arguments, frustrated with your spouse, or wondering why your relationship keeps running into the same challenges, this episode is for you. In this episode of The Mental Health Janitors, Aaron "Sgt Q" Quinonez sits down with Doc Jess to discuss one of the most overlooked truths about healthy relationships. The strongest marriages are often built when each person focuses on improving themselves before trying to fix their spouse. Drawing from personal experience, counseling practice, military life, and marriage research, they explore why self-reflection creates lasting change, how unresolved pain affects communication, and why assumptions often create conflict where none exists. You will learn how past experiences shape the way you interpret your spouse's actions, why your brain naturally tries to protect you from emotional pain, and how that protection can sometimes damage connection. Doc Jess also shares her practical 24-48-72 Hour Tool for responding thoughtfully instead of reacting emotionally. This episode explores the importance of personal accountability, emotional awareness, healthy communication, and creating space for growth within marriage. The goal is not to change your spouse. The goal is to become the healthiest version of yourself. Watch if you are searching for * How to improve your marriage * How to stop arguing with your spouse * Christian marriage advice * Marriage communication tips * How to build a stronger relationship * How to work on yourself first Be part of our online family where faith meets mental health, and honest conversations turn struggles into growth. Find practical strategies, real testimonies, and truth that doesn't flinch. 🔗 Join our community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/ [https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/] Listen on: * 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c [https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c] * 🎧 Website: https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/ [https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/] * 🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/ [https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/] Connect with Aaron "Sgt Q" Quinonez: * Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13 [https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13] * LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitytvstarpodcaster/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitytvstarpodcaster/] * Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/sgt.q_/ [https://www.instagram.com/sgt.q_/] Disclaimer: Educational only. Not medical, psychological, or relationship counseling advice. Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/support]

12 de jun de 202621 min
Portada del episodio How to Reinvent Yourself and Build Confidence (Overcome Identity Crisis)

How to Reinvent Yourself and Build Confidence (Overcome Identity Crisis)

Send us Fan Mail [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/fan_mail/new] 🎁 Free Resource from Estyn If this episode resonated with you and you want to understand where you are in your life right now, Estyn shares a simple tool to help you evaluate different areas of your life and see where you need to focus next. 👉 Get started here:  https://firstonesfree.com/ [https://firstonesfree.com/] If you feel stuck in who you are, struggle with confidence, or feel like you have lost your sense of identity, this episode is for you. In this episode of The Mental Health Janitors, Aaron “Sgt Q” Quinonez sits down with Estyn Elan, a style image consultant, to break down how identity, self image, and confidence are shaped and how you can rebuild them with intention. You will learn how many people go through identity shifts during life transitions like becoming a parent, moving to a new environment, or going through major life changes, and why these moments often lead to confusion, low self esteem, and feeling disconnected from yourself. This episode also explores how self mastery starts with understanding who you are beyond roles and expectations, and how your appearance, communication, and daily habits all play a role in how you show up in the world. You will learn a simple system to evaluate your life, identify where you feel out of alignment, and begin rebuilding your confidence from the inside out. The goal is not to become someone else, but to fully step into who you are meant to be. WATCH IF YOU ARE SEARCHING FOR * How to build confidence * How to reinvent yourself * Identity crisis help * How to improve self image * Personal growth and self development Timestamps * 00:00 Welcome to The Mental Health Janitors * 01:00 Growing Up with Limited Perspective * 02:30 Expanding Identity Through Travel * 04:00 Identity Crisis as a New Mom * 06:00 Why Most People Struggle with Self Esteem * 08:00 Self Mastery and Finding Your True Identity * 10:00 How Self Image Affects Confidence * 12:30 The 7 Step System for Personal Transformation * 16:00 The Compass of Life Direction Tool * 19:00 Real Life Transformation Stories and Next Steps Be part of our online family where faith meets mental health, and honest conversations with your spouse turn struggles into growth. Find practical strategies, real testimonies, and truth that doesn’t flinch. 🔗 Join our community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/ [https://www.facebook.com/groups/1988960518109166/] Listen on: * 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c [https://open.spotify.com/show/0nPegvqPi1AO47Xbx3EvNz?si=d2cdfa086c32460c] * 🎧 Website: https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/ [https://thementalhealthjanitors.com/] * 🎧 Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/ [https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/the-mental-health-janitors/] Connect with Aaron “Sgt Q” Quinonez: * Facebook – https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13 [https://www.facebook.com/SgtQ13] * LinkedIn – https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitytvstarpodcaster/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/keynotespeakerbusinessscalingcoachbetabloxjudgerealitytvstarpodcaster/] * Instagram – https://www.instagram.com/sgt.q_/ [https://www.instagram.com/sgt.q_/?hl=en] Disclaimer: Educational only; not medical advice. Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2224277/support]

3 de jun de 202621 min