EPISODE 8: Whose eyes are you looking through? The Male vs. the Female gaze

EPISODE 8: Whose eyes are you looking through? The Male vs. the Female gaze

When you look in the mirror, whose voice is in your head? Yours — or someone else's you've been carrying around for years without realizing it? This episode is about the male gaze, the female gaze, and everything in between. We're talking about where these concepts come from, how they quietly run in the background of the way you see yourself every single day, and — most importantly — how to start shifting out of one and into the other. We also pick up the thread from episode 7 and properly unpack compulsory heterosexuality (comp het), because it turns out comp het and the male gaze are the same system. One tells you who to want. The other tells you how to be seen. And together they've been running in the background of most of our lives like software we never agreed to download. In this episode: — What comp het actually is and how it connects to the gaze — John Berger's "Men look at women. Women watch themselves being looked at" — and why that line explains so much — What I see behind the camera in boudoir sessions — and the moment clients stop seeing themselves through the male gaze — Three ways to actually start shifting into your own gaze

EPISODE 7: MY COMING OUT STORY

I didn't think I was queer. Not in my teens, not in my twenties — not even when friends tried to tell me otherwise. It wasn't until I was 30, deep in a pandemic TikTok spiral, that something started to unravel.  This is my coming out story. And yes, The L Word is involved. In this episode I'm talking about why my perfectionism kept me from ever considering existing outside the lines, the deconstruction that happened when I started learning about the full spectrum of sexuality, why I didn't think I could be queer because I didn't "look" gay, and the story of meeting my partner at a New Year's party. I also share why I still don't have a neat label — and why I'm okay with that. Late is not the same as wrong. You're allowed to be in the middle of becoming. The Renaissance Room is a podcast for women who are done shrinking. New episodes every other Monday.

EPISODE 6: How I'm Unlearning Everything the Patriarchy Taught Me About My Body

Content Warning: This episode discusses eating disorders, disordered eating, and body dysmorphia. If this isn't what you need to hear right now, I totally get it. Take care of yourself first. Last episode, we talked about the patriarchy and how it teaches women to hate their bodies. Today, I'm telling you how it happened to me. This is my story: from high school, to college, to my 20's and now. This isn't a "cure" story. This is a "still in progress" story. Because recovery isn't linear. It's messy. It's two steps forward, one step back. It's choosing, over and over, to see yourself as already enough — even when the world is screaming that you're not. If you recognize yourself in any part of this story — if you've ever felt like your body was the problem, like you just needed to be smaller or different or fixed before you were worthy — you're not alone. And the way out? It's possible. --- The Renaissance Room Podcast is hosted by Katie Karlberg, boudoir photographer and professional myth-buster. 50% boudoir, 50% life. New episodes every other week. 📸 Book a boudoir session: https://www.renaissanceroomboudoir.com 📱 Instagram: @renaissanceroomboudoir --- RESOURCES: If you're struggling with an eating disorder or disordered eating: National Eating Disorders Association (NEDA): 1-800-931-2237 or text "NEDA" to 741741 NEDA Online Chat: nationaleatingdisorders.org/help-support/contact-helpline Psychology Today Therapist Finder: psychologytoday.com/us/therapists

Episode 5: Let's Talk About the Patriarchy and Your Body

Your body image isn't personal. It's political. The way you see your body, the things you criticize about it, the voice in your head that says you're not enough — that's not an accident. That's the system working exactly as designed. In this episode, we're talking about the patriarchy. What it actually is, how it shows up in your everyday life, and why body shame is a distraction by design. This is Feminism 101 — no academic theory, no jargon. Just the real, relatable ways the patriarchy affects you: Maybe you've noticed how little girls get complimented on how cute their outfits are, while little boys get asked what they're building or what they're curious about. Maybe you've been the one asked to plan the baby shower at work — because you're "just so good at that stuff" — even though event planning isn't in your job description. Maybe you've been in a professional space where YOU'RE running the show, and people still assume you must be working for the guy in the room. These moments don't feel big enough to call out. They're easy to brush off. But that's kind of the point. The patriarchy doesn't just live in big, headline-making moments. It lives in the tiny, everyday assumptions about who leads, who supports, who gets to take up space — and who's expected to make everything run smoothly behind the scenes. And here's how it connects to your body: If you're spending all your time and energy worrying about whether you're thin enough, pretty enough, acceptable enough — you're not spending that time organizing, running for office, demanding equality, or challenging the people in power. Body shame is a distraction. And it's by design. In this episode, we cover: - What the patriarchy actually is (and why it's not "all men are bad") - How you learned early that your appearance matters more than anything else - Why beauty standards are always shifting (and always unattainable) - Why "hating yourself feels safer than liking yourself" - Why loving your body is a radical, political act - How boudoir photography is an act of resistance The problem was never your body. The problem is a system that profits from you thinking it is. But you don't have to participate in that anymore. --- The Renaissance Room Podcast is hosted by Katie Karlberg, boudoir photographer and professional myth-buster. 50% boudoir, 50% life. New episodes every other week. 📸 Book a boudoir session: https://www.renaissanceroomboudoir.com 📱 Instagram: @renaissanceroomboudoir If this episode resonated with you, please rate and review! It helps other people find the show.

EPISODE 4: From 'Not Enough' to 'Magnificent': Reading Your Before & After Words

Before every boudoir session, I ask my clients to write one word on a slip of paper: How are you feeling right now? They write things like "terrified," "not enough," "ashamed," "uncomfortable in my own skin." Then at the end of the session—after they've been photographed, after they've seen themselves in ways they never have before—I ask them again. And that's when they write: "powerful," "free," "magnificent," "I am a fucking work of art." I've been collecting these words for years. Hundreds of them, folded up in two buckets—the "before" bucket and the "after" bucket. And I've never read them publicly. Until now. In this episode, I'm sharing the actual transformations. Word for word. Their voices, not mine. Every person who wrote "terrified" also wrote "powerful." Every person who wrote "not enough" also wrote "more than enough." Every person who wrote "I'm not ready" also wrote "I was always ready." The fear is normal. The doubt is normal. The voice that says you're not enough? That's normal too. But so is the transformation. If you've ever thought "I could never do boudoir" or "I'm different" or "I'm the exception"—this episode is for you. Because you're not the exception. You're the rule. Your before word is already written. You already know what it is. The question is: what do you want your after word to be? --- The Renaissance Room Podcast is hosted by Katie Karlberg, boudoir photographer and professional myth-buster. 50% boudoir, 50% life. New episodes every other week. 📸 Book a boudoir session: https://www.renaissanceroomboudoir.com 📱 Instagram: @renaissanceroomboudoir If this episode moved you, please rate and review! It helps other people find the show.