The Weekly Hot Spot

When Someone You Love Is Kinky: Love, Fear, and the Power of Acceptance with Janet Hardy

Today’s episode isn’t just a podcast about kink or BDSM – it’s a masterclass in emotional courage, vulnerability and redefining power in loving relationships. Author / kink educator, Janet Hardy helps to bridge the chasm between “normalcy” and kink. Listener questions drive this episode and you’re likely to hear your own worries in their questions. You don’t have to be kinky to benefit from these insights - many of these issues are universal challenges in life: how do you be vulnerable enough to speak what you want and is it always a good idea to be blunt? We begin with this question: “What if a woman struggles to own her power because of cultural beliefs?” As Footstool so poignantly puts it, many men fantasize about their vanilla partner becoming their Mistress — but how does she step into dominance when a lifetime of conditioning whispers, “Be nice. Be passive. Don’t lead.”? Janet offers a compassionate, no-nonsense response: Dominance isn’t about dominance — it’s about responsibility, clarity, and self-awareness. You don’t need to be born a Domme. You become one — through practice, reflection, and permission to shed old scripts. Then came Wellspanked’s dilemma: “When negotiating spanking, should we talk technique and intensity beforehand — clinically — or let it unfold in the heat of the moment?” The tension here is real: too much planning kills the spark; too little, and safety frays. Janet reminds us that true eroticism thrives in the space between trust and structure. Yes — talk logistics outside the scene. But leave room for improvisation within it. A safe word isn’t a buzzkill — it’s the foundation of freedom. One of our listeners, Ben, shared a fear so common it aches: “If my partner rejects my kinks, is the relationship irrevocably broken?” Janet’s answer? No — but it might need to evolve. Rejection isn’t always final. Sometimes, it’s the first step toward honest dialogue. What matters isn’t immediate acceptance — it’s willingness to listen, to be curious,and to try. What do you do if you get bad news? Janet has an honest answer - the relationship may need to change form — or end — with dignity. Then came the knife-edge question: “Can a partner ever see you as equal after extreme degradation?” This cuts to the heart of humiliation play — one of the most misunderstood, feared, and exciting dynamics in kink. Janet doesn’t flinch. She explains that the power of degradation lies not in the words, but in the aftercare. It’s not about erasing dignity — it’s about temporarily suspending it, with consent, for shared catharsis. And yes — equality returns, if both partners honor the reintegration. The scene ends. The love remains. Erika then turned to Janet’s latest work — Notes on an Aging Pervert — a book that’s “funny, sad, mind-bending.” She asked: Which essay was a lightbulb moment — for you or someone you love? Janet shared a story about aging, desire, and the myth of the “perfect scene.” The real magic, Janet said, isn’t in the play — it’s in what happens after: How do you come back to each other? How do you integrate the intensity? That’s where connection deepens — not in the whip, but in the whisper that follows. We closed with a truth that resonates through every episode of The Weekly Hot Spot podcast: Kink isn’t an escape from love — it’s a path into it. Deeper. Messier. More honest. If you’ve ever feared being “too much,” or worried you’re “not enough,” this conversation is for you. Tune in. Listen closely. And ask yourself: What would it feel like to be truly seen — kinks and all? Janet Hardy’s website [https://janetwhardyauthor.com/] When Someone You Love is Kinky [https://www.amazon.com/When-Someone-You-Love-Kinky/dp/1890159239] The Ethical Slut [https://www.amazon.com/Ethical-Slut-Third-Practical-Relationships/dp/0399579664/ref=sr_1_3?crid=23M1L2O7GKQEX&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.B-J4yi5pESx_gA_vpmKW2Ga-fN40hiVcnsrOGC4WAHFicW5YXeXHCp382bT-my_wVZGt-K5vvTudVDY1y20vvYjRt6AjL3M0cBDc87t1RpXrU6if02vhNqKwm19eXUQm6VtXeEPV_iiEKpSsVjWJd_yH0J8IlWpZVItY7cf9Dh5QTBNeAYOBgI0_Lsp0uDChNRrMGHEzNyxri8bjy3yTyZArsjUUESN4AbbsGqn-nJ8.QhT2dNtxstdttkQLJx4SwB31OvbB5uVjPv_-USRnCfQ&dib_tag=se&keywords=janet+Hardy+books&qid=1761434145&sprefix=janet+hardy+books%2Caps%2C124&sr=8-3] Radical Ecstasy  [https://www.amazon.com/Radical-Ecstasy-Dossie-Easton-ebook/dp/B005HZ6F5M/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0] Mistress Olivia’s blog: Experienced Mistress [https://www.experiencedmistress.com/] Olivia@EnchantrixEmpire.com Mistress Erika’s blog: Intelligent Phone Fantasy [https://intelligentphonefantasy.com/] Erika@EnchantrixEmpire.com DISCORD: LDWOlivia and LDWErika

Ethical Sluts & Radical Ecstasy: Desire, Consent, and Coming Into Power with Janet Hardy

What happens when surrender becomes sacred? When boundaries are not barriers—but bridges to deeper intimacy? Meet one of the most influential voices in modern kink culture. Janet Hardy is today’s guest. She’s the co-author of the revolutionary The Ethical Slut: A Practical Guide to Polyamory, Open Relationships & Other Adventures and Radical Ecstasy: SM Journeys to Transcendence … to name just two of her books. She has a wealth of knowledge and experience.  Listeners of The Weekly Hot Spot podcast, sent in a lot of questions and inspired this intimate conversation. Topics include: The intersections of power, pain, love and liberation. Myths and fears about ethical non-monogamy in kink spaces. Details about the new Workbook for The Ethical Slut. When Janet shares about how real change begins with honest self-inquiry, not permission from others, all three women talk about claiming their own personal erotic power. What does it mean to really choose who you are in your relationships? And, what is beyond tolerating a relationship. Hint: it’s not always easy or safe to open up to this view of love and pleasure.  Janet talks about building emotional resilience when having these vulnerable conversations. You’ll hear Mistress Olivia’s personal reflection on how Radical Ecstasy transformed her understanding of Dominance and submission — not as control, but as co-created surrender. “Pain is not the goal. Surrender is.” That one line shifted everything. Together, they explore how power exchange is one of the most intimate acts we’re capable of — a dance where trust becomes tangible, and vulnerability becomes strength. We also tackle real listener questions: * A trans woman shares her experience of feeling Dominant with male partners and submissive with female ones — is this a known dynamic? Janet offers thoughtful insight into gendered power dynamics and erotic archetypes. * For the nervous beginner — especially the "vanilla wife" being asked to step into Dominance — what are the real fears women face? Spoiler: It’s not about lack of interest. It’s about responsibility, judgment, and the weight of expectation. * And then… the eternal debate: Who’s really in control — the Domme or the sub? Janet’s answer may surprise you. (Hint: It’s not a power struggle — it’s a paradox.) Finally, for those walking the spiritual edge of kink, we explore how to distinguish emotional overwhelm from authentic spiritual surrender — because not every tear in a scene is transcendence. Some are signals. Learning the difference? That’s where true mastery begins. This episode isn’t just for kinksters. It’s for anyone who’s ever loved deeply, feared openly, or longed to be seen. It’s about coming into power — not over others, but within yourself. Janet Hardy Website [https://janetwhardyauthor.com/] The Ethical Slut [https://www.amazon.com/Ethical-Slut-Third-Practical-Relationships/dp/0399579664/ref=sr_1_3?crid=23M1L2O7GKQEX&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.B-J4yi5pESx_gA_vpmKW2Ga-fN40hiVcnsrOGC4WAHFicW5YXeXHCp382bT-my_wVZGt-K5vvTudVDY1y20vvYjRt6AjL3M0cBDc87t1RpXrU6if02vhNqKwm19eXUQm6VtXeEPV_iiEKpSsVjWJd_yH0J8IlWpZVItY7cf9Dh5QTBNeAYOBgI0_Lsp0uDChNRrMGHEzNyxri8bjy3yTyZArsjUUESN4AbbsGqn-nJ8.QhT2dNtxstdttkQLJx4SwB31OvbB5uVjPv_-USRnCfQ&dib_tag=se&keywords=janet+Hardy+books&qid=1761434145&sprefix=janet+hardy+books%2Caps%2C124&sr=8-3] Radical Ecstasy [https://www.amazon.com/Radical-Ecstasy-Dossie-Easton-ebook/dp/B005HZ6F5M/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0] Mistress Olivia’s blog:  Experienced Mistress [https://www.experiencedmistress.com/] olivia@enchantrixempire.com Mistress Erika’s blog: Intelligent Phone Fantasy [https://intelligentphonefantasy.com/] erika@enchantrixempire.com DISCORD: LDWOlivia and LDWErika

Wired to Obey? How a Submissive Sissy Finds Power in Pleasing a Femdom Mistress

Today’s episode is an intimate dive into one of the most misunderstood — yet deeply rewarding — dynamics in the world of Femdom and distance domination: the submissive sissy. Spoiler: It’s not just about lace, lipstick, or humiliation. It’s about surrender, self-discovery, and the quiet power found in your devotion to your Mistress. Have you ever asked yourself: “Why do I feel drawn to this role?” “Is wanting to serve a woman… weak?” “How do I truly become the sissy my Mistress deserves?” …then this episode is your permission slip to lean in. What We Explore: * Why not all sissies are submissive — and not all submissives are sissies * The emotional and psychological journey of embracing feminization * How a true Femdom Mistress guides, shapes, and transforms her sissy * The paradox of control: giving up power to gain freedom * The sacred art of being of service — beyond just sex or chores * Why communication is the most important part of a D/s relationship * Navigating boundaries, vulnerability, and trust in a D/s dynamic * The myth of “more is better” — and why following her lead beats initiative every time * And the big one: How submission changes you… and how the submissive also changes Mistress. Remember, it's not about escaping who you are — it’s about uncovering who you were meant to be under the gaze of a woman who sees you, owns you, and refines you. A skilled Femdom Mistress doesn’t just dominate — she mentors. She holds space for your fears, your shame, and your curiosity. Above all, she rewrites your future whether you are: * New to sissy training * Stuck in a cycle of self-sabotage or secret shame * Or already serving but craving deeper connection and purpose …this episode will remind you: You’re not broken. You’re becoming. Get in touch: Mistress Olivia:  email:  Olivia@EnchantrixEmpire.com Discord: LDWOlivia Twitter X: @MistressOlivia1 blog: ExperiencedMistress.com [https://www.experiencedmistress.com/] Mistress Erika: email:  Erika@EnchantrixEmpire.com Discord: LDWErika Twitter X: @ErikaEnchantrix blog: Intelligent Phone Fantasy [https://intelligentphonefantasy.com/]

Kinky Halloween: Dressed by Mistress

Mistress Olivia and Ms Erika crack open the candy bowl of taboo for this episode which is inspired by a listener question. Jen Jenn asks about sissy costume suggestions for Halloween and your Femdom hosts decide to talk about all sorts of fun, festive and naughty costumes. First though, we go off on safari about CANDY CORN.  This is the perfect holiday for feminization in public. We give some specific ideas how you can be femme and get away with your sissy play at a Halloween party. Costume ideas for sissies: a Hooters Girl slutty costumes comics cosplay and more. Speaking of cosplay, a perfect blend of feminization and humiliation bondage could be a Harley Quinn costume with literal restraints! Hear what each Mistress is thinking about for her Halloween costume. We also talk about blending BDSM, kink and creativity for this fun holiday. Mistress Olivia’s blog: Experienced Mistress [https://www.experiencedmistress.com/] Olivia@EnchantrixEmpire.com Mistress Erika’s blog: Intelligent Phone Fantasy [https://intelligentphonefantasy.com/] Erika@EnchantrixEmpire.com DISCORD: LDWOlivia and LDWErika Available for phone or texting sessions 800-356-6169

The FILTHY MILFS return to talk blow jobs, sexy lingerie, having great sex and exploring BDSM

Ellen Ancui and Sophie Levine, hosts of the new podcast FILTHY MILFS return to have a candid conversation about sex, foreplay, power exchange, kink and more. If you’ve ever seen a group of women having a fun, lively conversation and wondered what they’re talking about then you’re in luck. This is like we’re all sitting around with cocktails and dishing about: Blow Jobs How to make cum taste good Reaction of women to sucking cock Snowballing and cum eating Sharing erotic fantasies with your partner Intimacy and great sex Sexual wellness Aging and keeping sex juicy and exciting Normalizing the conversation around all aspects of sex Being open minded about different kinds of erotic pleasure Swingers lifestyle Taking viagra for phone sex sessions Sex work and sex workers Luxury lingerie and why it's so fun to dress up. Finally, we have a conversation about women and power. Could either or both of these ladies want to be a Femdom? We talk about myths and misconceptions about BDSM as well as the relaxation and release for the submissive. FILTHY MILFS podcast is available on all podcast platforms, YouTube, Instagram, Facebook and maybe even Linkedin. Here’s the link to FILTHY MILFS on Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7dkPyPi2qAOO7fo8o402nb] Mistress Olivia’s blog:  Experienced Mistress [https://www.experiencedmistress.com/] Olivia@EnchantrixEmpire.com Mistress Erika’s blog: Intelligent Phone Fantasy [https://intelligentphonefantasy.com/] Erika@EnchantrixEmpire.com DISCORD:  LDWOlivia and LDWErika