Off the Fence with Karen Covy: Mastering Decision Making, Divorce & More

The Truth About Power and Marriage Equality

41 min · 13 de may de 2026
Portada del episodio The Truth About Power and Marriage Equality

Descripción

Most people in unhappy marriages aren’t stuck because they suddenly fell out of love with each other. They’re stuck because the relationship has developed a fundamental power imbalance that has eroded trust and dashed the dream of marriage equality that the couple shared in the early days of their marriage.  In this podcast episode, Drs. Jake and Jennifer Dean-Hill, therapists, authors, and married partners who've built their lives around the science of equal partnership, share the story of how their own 33-year marriage became the laboratory for their “Two Crowns Framework” — a model built on the radical idea that true marital harmony requires both people to stay fully themselves. The doctors dig into why so many relationships quietly default to one person leading and the other shrinking and why women, in particular, are often conditioned to hand their power over without even realizing it.  The Two Crowns Framework offers a concrete alternative model for marriage equality and relationship harmony. It’s grounded in mutual respect, shared power, and the idea that when two whole people bring their full selves into their marriage, without shrinking, they can create a “kingdom” that’s stronger than what either of them can create on their own. The Drs. also get specific about boundaries, motivation, and the surprising science behind why conflict escalates differently for men and women. They dive deeply into what it actually takes to rebuild trust once a relationship has hit a breaking point.  Whether your marriage is “on the fence” or you’re already facing divorce but want to create a peaceful co-parenting relationship, this podcast episode can help you create the solid relationship you desire. About Drs. Jake & Jenn Drs. Jake & Jennifer Dean-Hill are therapists, authors, and partners in every sense of the word. As college sweethearts turned clinicians, they discovered that harmony in partnership comes from shared purpose. Through their own evolution, they developed the Wear Two Crowns framework: a modern model of partnership built on mutual respect, power, and peace. Today, they help couples, leaders, and organizations learn how to lead together without losing themselves in the process. Drs. Jake & Jenn both have their Masters in Social Work, their License in Independent Clinical Social Work, and Doctorates in Global Leadership and they reside in Southeast WA state. Connect with Drs. Jake & Jenn You can connect with Drs. Jake & Jenn on LinkedIn at Drs. Jake & Jenn [https://www.linkedin.com/company/drs-jake-jenn/] and on Facebook at Drs. Jake & Jenn [https://www.facebook.com/drsjakeandjenn/].  You can follow Drs. Jake & Jenn on YouTube at @DrsJakeJenn [https://www.youtube.com/@DrsJakeJenn] and on Instagram at Drs. Jake & Jenn [https://www.instagram.com/drsjakeandjenn/]. To learn more about how to work with Drs. Jake & Jenn, visit their website at  Drs. Jake and Jenn [DrsJakeandJenn.com].  And you can find their book here Two Crowns, One Kingdom: Navigate the dark forest to reach your happily-ever-after [https://a.co/d/00nQP8p9]. Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@karencovy95]. You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/karencovy/], Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/KarenCovy], Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/karencovylawyer/], Twitter [https://twitter.com/KarenCovy], and on her own website at karencovy.com [https://karencovy.com/].

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1 de jul de 202639 min
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episode The Truth About Coercive Control in Divorce artwork

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If you've ever felt like you were losing your mind in your relationship - questioning your own memory, shrinking your social circle, or blaming yourself for your partner's moods - there's a name for that. It’s called coercive control. In this podcast episode, Jolee Vacchi, family law attorney and founder of Foundations Family Law and Mediation Center in Worcester, Massachusetts, explains how coercive control (including manipulation, gaslighting, and emotional intimidation) slowly chips away at a person’s confidence, relationships, and sense of autonomy without ever leaving visible bruises. She breaks down the subtle behaviors that often get dismissed as “normal relationship problems” and explains why so many people stay stuck far longer than they ever imagined.  Jolee also tackles one of the most counterintuitive questions in high-conflict divorce: is going to court actually the right move when your spouse thrives on control? (Her answer might surprise you.) Jolee also discloses specific strategies that can shift the power dynamic when you're up against someone who knows exactly how to weaponize the legal system. From parenting coordinators to protective orders to keeping yourself sane while living under the same roof during divorce proceedings, this conversation is packed with practical, eye-opening guidance. Whether you're in the thick of your divorce or just starting to ask hard questions, this episode will help you understand what you're dealing with, and what your options actually are. About Jolee Jolee Vacchi is known as "The Compassionate Divorce Attorney." She is the Founding Attorney of Foundations Family Law & Mediation Center located in Worcester, Massachusetts. As a mediator, Collaboratively-trained attorney, and Coercive Control Trauma-Informed Attorney, Jolee focuses her practice on out-of-court solutions for her clients to resolve their family law conflicts as painlessly and peacefully as possible. Connect with Jolee You can connect with Jolee on LinkedIn at Jolee E. Vacchi, Esq [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jolee-e-vacchi-esq/] and on Facebook at Foundations Family Law [https://www.facebook.com/FoundationsFamilyLaw]. You can follow Jolee on YouTube at @FoundationsFamilyLaw [https://www.youtube.com/@FoundationsFamilyLaw], on Instagram at Foundations Family Law [https://www.instagram.com/foundationsfamilylaw] and on her podcast at Divorce Detox [https://divorce-detox.com/].  To learn more about working with Jolee, visit her website at Foundations Family Law [https://foundationsfamilylaw.com/].     Karen Covy is a Divorce Coach and Consultant, Lawyer, Author, and Speaker who is dedicated to helping people make the best decisions possible for themselves, their families, and their future - especially in stressful times. You can check out Karen's videos on YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@karencovy95]. You can connect with Karen on LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/karencovy/], Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/KarenCovy], Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/karencovylawyer/], Twitter [https://twitter.com/KarenCovy], and on her own website at karencovy.com [https://karencovy.com/].

3 de jun de 202637 min