Ep 16 Breaking Down "Three Makes Baby": What We Learned About Building a Donor-Concieved Family (Updated Podcast)

EP 20: 5 Things to Know Before Doing a MicroTESE

In this episode, we talk through the five biggest things we wish we had known before doing a microTESE. After going through the surgery and learning more after the fact, we realized there were several conversations we wish had happened sooner. We discuss genetic testing, how diagnosis can affect the odds of finding sperm, why overall success rates are not the same as your personal success rate, and why it matters to involve your IVF clinic before scheduling surgery. We also talk about Matt’s testosterone levels after surgery, the symptoms we noticed months later, and the importance of asking direct questions about hormone risks before moving forward. We get into recovery, anesthesia, constipation from pain medication, and the practical things that would have made the process easier. * onobstructive azoospermia (overall): Approximately 47% chance of finding sperm. * Complete AZFa deletion: Near 0% chance of finding sperm. * Complete AZFb deletion: Near 0% chance of finding sperm. * AZFc deletion: Approximately 47% average chance of finding sperm, with guideline estimates ranging from 50–75%. * Klinefelter syndrome: Approximately 44–50% chance of finding sperm. * Sertoli Cell-Only Syndrome: Approximately 22–41% chance of finding sperm. * Prior failed MicroTESE (salvage procedures): Approximately 18–43% chance of finding sperm. This is where we’ll include the different microTESE sperm retrieval odds based on diagnosis, including non-obstructive azoospermia, AZFa deletion, AZFb deletion, AZFc deletion, Klinefelter syndrome, and Sertoli cell-only pattern. 1. Does your lab prefer fresh or frozen microTESE sperm, and why? 2. What are your lab’s fertilization and live-birth outcomes with frozen-thawed testicular sperm? 3. How often does your lab see usable sperm survive thawing? 4. How do you freeze very small numbers of sperm: individual sperm, microdroplets, tissue pieces or standard vials? 5. What happens if only one or two usable sperm are found? 6. Would you recommend coordinating the procedure with egg retrieval in our specific case? 7. What happens to the eggs if no sperm is found? 8. Should we have donor sperm available as a backup? 9. If sperm is found, how many IVF attempts could the stored sample realistically support? 10. Who will search the tissue, and how long will the laboratory continue searching? 11. Will tissue be evaluated during surgery so the surgeon knows whether to examine the second testicle? 12. Can the urology lab and IVF embryology lab communicate directly before the procedure? This is where we’ll include the questions we recommend asking your urologist and IVF clinic before surgery, including questions about genetic testing, testosterone, fresh vs. frozen sperm, timing with egg retrieval, backup donor sperm, lab protocols, and what happens if only a small number of sperm are found. This episode is not medical advice, but it is the conversation we wish someone had walked us through before surgery. If you are considering a microTESE, we hope it helps you ask better questions, get clearer answers, and understand the tradeoffs before making a decision.

Episode 20: Starting the IVM Process with Donor Sperm, Fertility Medications, and Preparing for Egg Retrieval

In this episode, we share a detailed update on where we are in our fertility treatment process as we officially begin the IVM (In Vitro Maturation) study. After months of testing, appointments, procedures, and waiting, we finally have a treatment calendar, medications, and a timeline leading up to egg retrieval. We walk through the full protocol, including birth control, Clomid, monitoring appointments, trigger shots, and what happens during the IVM process. We also discuss the possibility of being removed from the study if follicle development doesn't meet protocol requirements, how embryo creation differs with IVM, and what the next steps could look like if the study doesn't result in viable embryos. Throughout the episode, we talk openly about the realities of male factor infertility, using donor sperm, balancing optimism with realistic expectations, and the many decisions that come with fertility treatment. We also discuss the financial considerations of IVF and IUI, concerns about embryo creation, and what we're hoping for as we move into the next stage of treatment. Whether you're researching IVM, preparing for IVF, navigating male factor infertility, or simply following our journey, this episode provides a real-time look at the planning, uncertainty, and decision-making that happen before egg retrieval. Resources & Links Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sidneyhdavis/ [https://www.instagram.com/sidneyhdavis/] Listen to previous episodes of Unfertile & Unfiltered for more conversations about male factor infertility, donor conception, microTESE procedures, fertility treatment, IVF, IUI, and family building.

EP 19 - IVM Study Update

After a week off for boys camp, girls camp, and a near trailer disaster on the side of the freeway, we are back with an update on where they are in their fertility journey. In this episode, they break down their upcoming IVM timeline, including birth control, stimulation medications, egg retrieval, and what the next several weeks are expected to look like. They also share an update on their donor sperm arriving at the clinic and discuss a recent conversation with Lauren, a donor-conceived advocate working to create new pathways for donor matching and education. The conversation also touches on the realities of navigating fertility treatment, learning to live with uncertainty, and the challenge of balancing healthy lifestyle changes without becoming consumed by trying to control every variable. Sidney shares her experience getting her first pap smear, reflects on some of the unexpected twists in their journey to parenthood, and talks about why she's focusing less on perfection and more on doing her best while letting go of the outcome. Connect with Lauren: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespermqueen/ Website: batch.global [https://www.batch.global/?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQPOTM2NjE5NzQzMzkyNDU5AAGnZWQ8tiLTow1Cqgsr6r6knt6NXwdy8XNz8Fr4iVvi0v03kLsWd2G1fdrs-Y0_aem_iIS5Alau3TlwrsZLvre12Q] If you're interested in sharing your own infertility story or joining the conversation, reach out to Sidney on Instagram. Thanks for following along and being part of the journey.

Episode 18: MicroTESE Recovery, Low Testosterone & Fertility Treatment Updates

In this episode, we give an update on where we’re at in our infertility journey, including Matt’s post-microTESE recovery, testing for low testosterone, and additional genetic testing for male factor infertility. We also talk through our first IVM study appointment, the frustration of fertility timelines, preparing for egg retrieval, and some of the lifestyle changes we’re making while trying to improve overall health and egg quality before treatment. We also get into the emotional side of using a sperm donor, what that process has looked like over time, and how infertility continues to impact different parts of life and relationships as things move forward.

Ep 17 - Reading the Journal Entries From Our Infertility Diagnosis

In this episode, we talk through Mother’s Day, the unexpected emotions that came with it, and what happened after reading back through old journal entries from the beginning of our infertility journey. We go back to the first few months of trying to conceive — the excitement, assumptions, optimism, and the gradual shift into confusion, testing, diagnosis, and grief after finding out we were dealing with severe male factor infertility and non-obstructive azoospermia. The episode covers: * The emotional shift from trying to prevent pregnancy to trying desperately to conceive * Reading journal entries from the beginning of the process * The emotional impact of failed cycles, testing, and the microTESE surgery * Mother’s Day while navigating infertility * The pressure of hope, faith, and expectations during infertility * Processing grief differently as a husband and wife * Looking back at how quickly life changed over a few months