Unilever's $1.2B War Chest Deploys, David's Lawsuit Dropped, and $1M in 5 Minutes

Puig-Estée Collapses, Jams Lands the NFL, and the Most Famous Athlete on Earth Couldn't Save His Brand

The $40 billion beauty mega merger is dead. Lionel Messi's hydration brand shuttered. And a PB&J brand with zero celebrity co-founders just became the official PB&J of the NFL. This week on Unpackaged Goods: Puig and Estée Lauder merger talks ended without a deal. We tracked this for over a month — exploratory talks to serious conversations to founding families at the table to nothing. Governance killed it. Both families wanted control. Neither would cede it. The biggest missed opportunity in beauty this decade. Mas+ by Messi is shutting down after two years. The most famous athlete who has ever lived plus Mark Anthony's distribution infrastructure. Still couldn't make a sports drink work. Celebrity gets you trial. Only the product gets you back. Jams landed an NFLPA licensing deal — the brand that beat Uncrustables at Target in six months is now the official PB&J of the NFL. JJ Watt and Caleb Williams are investors. NFL teams go through 3,600 PB&Js per week. Zero celebrity co-founders. Just a better product. In this episode I break down: → Why the Puig-Estée merger collapsed and what it means for beauty's largest companies → Governance as the deal killer — solving it before valuation is the lesson → Blackstone and CD&R circling the Magnum Ice Cream Company (Ben & Jerry's, Talenti, Yasso) at €8B+ → Jams landing the NFLPA and why the product always beats the celebrity → OLIPOP's packaging refresh — the most strategically important rebrand of the year → Why function gets you noticed but shelf appeal gets you paid → Mas+ by Messi shuttering — what the most dramatic celebrity CPG failure teaches every founder → The updated celebrity CPG graveyard: MOSS, PRIME, Allbirds, Keys Soulcare, and now Mas+ → Brami closing $33M from VMG Partners for the fastest-growing pasta brand in America → Danone finally exiting Lifeway after 27 years and two failed takeover attempts → BuzzBallz up 65% to $570M under Sazerac — the infrastructure thesis validated → Electrolit up 22.8% — growing five times faster than Gatorade → IM8 raising guidance to $190-210M after hitting $100M in 11 months → OLIPOP retail volume up 17.5% while reducing prices and walking away from Coca-Cola → Proper Wild raising $11M at $161M as energy shots pivot to gummies → Good Molecules backed by Aria Growth — profitable, north of $100M in masstige skincare → Stone & Skillet raising $5M for artisan English muffins at 3,000 doors → Banagua raising $5.5M for banana water at 3,500 doors → Sleep or Die $1M from True Beauty Ventures — sleep wellness enters the portfolio → E.L.F. handing Keys Soulcare back to Alicia Keys — focus over celebrity clutter → Gordon Ramsay launching Krude olive oil — a celebrity CPG fit that actually makes sense → David Protein cod 2.0 in golden tins — 18g protein, $40 per 4-pack → Bob's Red Mill packaging refresh by Turner Duckworth → Sam McBride (former RXBAR COO) taking the CEO chair at Kettle & Fire → Pabst discontinuing Schlitz after 177 years → Distribution: MOSH at 2,000 Target stores, Neuro at 3,000+ Walmart, Juni at 750+ Kroger, AG1 at Ulta, Crown Affair all-door Sephora, Jams nationwide on Gopuff The thesis this week is clarity. The brands and deals that succeed are the ones where the reason to believe is painfully obvious. Better PB&J. Protein pasta. Delicious soda. Two words or less. The brands that need a paragraph are the ones shuttering. The brands that explain themselves instantly are the ones getting funded, getting distribution, and getting the NFL. Clarity wins. Every time. 🥣 Subscribe to The Deeter Digest: https://deetseatsnyc.substack.com/ 🎙️ Unpackaged Goods podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/6moZEYjORSb5XZ7LVu8b3f?si=6c656c85e78e487a 📸 @deetseatsnyc on Instagram/TikTok 🥒 Pickle Advisors: pickleadvisors.com #CPG #ConsumerGoods #EsteeLauder #Puig #Messi #Jams #NFLPA #OLIPOP #Brami #VMGPartners #BuzzBallz #Sazerac #Blackstone #Lifeway #Danone #IM8 #Electrolit #CelebrityBrands #UnpackagedGoods #DeeterDigest #ClarityWins #BuildAccordingly

She Started With $5K. Now It's Worth $600M. Plus BTS, BERO, and Why Quiet Compounding Builds Empires

A woman started a granola brand with $5,000. Seventeen years later it might sell for $600 million. In the same week, BTS launched 30 products at Walmart on day one. Two playbooks. Both might work. But only one was built to last regardless of whether the founder stays famous. This week on Unpackaged Goods: Purely Elizabeth exploring a $600M sale — founded in 2009 with $5K in savings by holistic nutrition counselor Elizabeth Stein. Over $200M in revenue across 100,000+ doors. No VC at the start. No celebrity. No viral moment. The anti-velocity story in a market obsessed with speed. BTS launched ARIH at Walmart with nearly 30 SKUs across noodles, energy drinks, and probiotic sodas. The most ambitious celebrity CPG launch in history. Backed by Korean food giants Paldo and Hy. ARMY will deliver a massive day one. The question is month two. BERO launched at Kroger, Publix, AND Walmart in one week — full national grocery coverage in under two years. The Casamigos alumni hire paying dividends. Celsius plus Alani Nu volume up 26.3%. Alani specifically up 94% with prices rising. Pricing power plus demand growth simultaneously — the holy grail of brand economics. The $1.8B acquisition looks like one of the best deals in CPG history. Amy's Kitchen quietly approaching $1 billion in frozen. 57,000+ stores. No hype. Decades of compounding. Also covered: Celleste Bio producing cell-cultured chocolate bars for Mondelēz. Westman Atelier raising $15M approaching $100M. Hero Group acquiring The Gut Stuff in the UK. Frozen One closing $2M seed ahead of nationwide Target. Nomio closing $4M from Collab Fund for Tour de France-endorsed recovery supplements. Run The Jewels raising $2M for RTD cocktails. Laird acquiring Terrasoul for $48M. Tivoli Brewing becoming 18th largest craft brewer. Happy Dad YTD up 35.1%. Pure Genius hitting $1M in first month at Target. GLP-1 adoption doubling in the UK. TRUFF aioli launch. Capri Sun goes functional for kids. Distribution wins across Kroger, Walmart, Target, Publix, and H-E-B. The quiet compounders and the rockets are both winning. The losers are the brands in the middle — too slow for velocity, too unfocused for compounding. Pick your lane. Commit. Subscribe to The Deeter Digest: https://deetseatsnyc.substack.com/p/the-deeter-digest-2c1 Follow @deetseatsnyc: https://www.instagram.com/deetseatsnyc/ Pickle Advisors: pickleadvisors.com #CPG #PurelyElizabeth #BTS #BERO #Celsius #AlaniNu #AmysKitchen #UnpackagedGoods #DeeterDigest #Entrepreneurship #QuietCompounding

Unilever's $1.2B War Chest Deploys, David's Lawsuit Dropped, and $1M in 5 Minutes

Two weeks ago I said every beauty and wellness founder should have their deal room ready. This week Unilever spent $1.2 billion on a supplement brand that didn't exist three years ago. Called it. This week on Unpackaged Goods: Unilever acquired Grüns for $1.2 billion — its first acquisition since merging food with McCormick and pocketing $15.7 billion in cash. Founded in 2023, Grüns scaled to $300M ARR in under three years, ships 10 million gummies daily, and has 95% repeat usage at 4-6x per week. Unilever didn't buy a supplement brand. They bought a daily habit. And they still have $14.5 billion left to spend. In the same week, David Protein's class action lawsuit was dropped — the Mean Girls comparisons, the bomb calorimetry debate, Peter Rahal's "no one is getting Regina Georged" — it's all over. The science won. The social media outrage lost. David immediately launched at Costco across five states. But co-founder and former President Zach Ranen quietly left in February to start something new. The lawsuit is over. The Costco expansion is on. And the co-founder departure opens a chapter worth watching closely. In this episode I break down: → Unilever's $1.2B Grüns acquisition — why the 95% repeat usage stat made Unilever write a billion-dollar check → The Unilever wellness portfolio map: OLLY, SmartyPants, Liquid I.V., Nutrafol, Grüns — each filling a specific daily habit slot → $14.5B still in the war chest — sleep, gut health, longevity, and women's health are the obvious next targets → The Puig x Estée Lauder $40B merger update — founding families meeting this week to finalize terms → David Protein's biggest week — lawsuit dropped, Costco launch across five states, co-founder exits. What Zach Ranen builds next might matter more than the Costco expansion → Reale Actives doing $1M in sales in under 5 minutes — the creator-to-brand pipeline produces launch velocity tradit

The Co-Founder of Hims & Hers Is Back — And She's Reinventing Coffee Syrup | Interview with POCA Founders + CPG News

She co-founded Hims & Hers in 2017 and helped build it into a $4 billion telehealth company. Now Hilary Coles is back — and she's coming for your morning coffee. This week on Unpackaged Goods, I sit down with Hilary Coles and Emily Boschwitz, the co-founders of POCA — portable, zero-sugar coffee and matcha syrups that are reinventing how we flavor our drinks. Hilary co-founded Hims & Hers and built out their physical products and brand. Emily was their first marketing hire. Together, they watched wellness overtake big pharma by 4x over the last decade and decided the next frontier was the one vice we're all still allowed to have: coffee. We talk about the Hims & Hers origin story and what they learned building a company that proved lowercase-h healthcare was real. Why coffee and matcha are the last sacred rituals in a world optimized to death. How they formulated zero-sugar syrups using rare sugars like monk fruit and allulose that actually dissolve in iced drinks — because 75% of Starbucks orders are iced and traditional syrup sinks to the bottom. The pistachio flavor that's giving people an emotional reaction. Building a second company as moms with young kids. Why the GLP-1 movement is creating unexpected demand for flavor in protein-heavy diets. And why they worked with the Glossier design team to make POCA feel like a beauty moment, not a food product. Plus the weekly CPG news breakdown: → Unilever x McCormick is official — $20B revenue, $60B combined value, $15.7B cash payment → KDP closes $18B JDE Peet's and splits into Beverage Co. and Global Coffee Co. → Chomps approaching $900M in revenue — 36% growth at massive scale → IM8 hits $100M ARR in 11 months — Beckham, Giannis on the cap table → Mars Men hits $100M in 18 months — $27.5M Series A from L Catterton → Create closes $20M — Mike Repole and Unilever Ventures invest → The Casamigos Alumni Effect — former CEO launches Por Qué No canned cocktails → Khloud Protein Chips debuting exclusively at Target → Cadence, Clean Simple Eats, and Boka all launching at 2,000+ Walmart doors → Cleanlogic at 6,000+ CVS stores → Something Sweet nationwide at Whole Foods → Bloom Sparkling Energy launching in Canada via KDP The mega deals are closing. The rockets are launching. And the co-founder of one of the most important consumer health companies of the last decade just told you where she thinks the next opportunity lives — in the cup you're holding right now. Subscribe to The Deeter Digest for the full weekly breakdown: https://deetseatsnyc.substack.com/p/the-deeter-digest-80e Follow @deetseatsnyc on Instagram & TikTok Learn more about Pickle Advisors: pickleadvisors.com Check out POCA: https://pickpoca.com/?srsltid=AfmBOooZl8fro92SgJTKY0ZLhh7Ah6p9CW8LMjQmxAHo1uVZofiKAGil #CPG #ConsumerGoods #POCA #HimsAndHers #Coffee #Matcha #Unilever #McCormick #Chomps #IM8 #MarsMen #LCatterton #Create #UnpackagedGoods #DeeterDigest #Entrepreneurship #VentureCapital #FunctionalBeverages #WomenFounders

$4B Supplements, $1.15B Meal Shakes, and the Biggest Food Deal in Years

Every major story this week is about deciding what you want to be when you grow up. McCormick and Unilever are in talks to merge food divisions — Hellmann's, Knorr, Cholula, Frank's Red Hot under one roof in a deal worth tens of billions. Danone paid $1.15 billion for Huel because meal replacement was a billion-dollar category all along. L Catterton is shopping Thorne for up to $4 billion after buying it for $680M three years ago — the most impressive PE flip in wellness history. Sazerac acquired Dirty Shirley after 934% sales growth. And Glossier is closing 9 of 12 stores to focus on hero products. In this episode, I break down: → Why the McCormick x Unilever deal signals the end of the diversified conglomerate era → What Danone's $1.15B Huel acquisition means for every founder in functional nutrition → The math behind L Catterton's potential 6x return on Thorne — and why vertical integration commands a $4B valuation → How Dirty Shirley turned childhood nostalgia into 934% growth and a Sazerac acquisition → Why Glossier closing stores is actually the most bullish signal for the brand in years → General Mills selling $350M in Brazilian food to go deeper into pet care → Ferrero buying another protein brand because the company behind Nutella decided protein bars are the future → The 15,000-brand beverage problem — and what separates winners from the graveyard → DryWater adding 41,000 doors approaching $100M — the next Liquid I.V.? → Tilray completing the BrewDog hat-trick across three continents → Funding rounds from Habiza, Good Girl Snacks, Laoban, Yough, JiYu, and Funny Water → Distribution wins at Target, Sprouts, H-E-B, Sam's Club, Kroger, and Erewhon The consolidation wave isn't coming. It's here. The big are getting bigger. The focused are getting smarter. And the window between emerging brand and acquisition target just got shorter. Subscribe to The Deeter Digest for the full weekly breakdown: https://substack.com/home/post/p-191864754 Follow @deetseatsnyc on Instagram and Tik Tok Learn more about Pickle Advisors: pickleadvisors.com Rate us five stars if this episode changes how you think about portfolio strategy. #CPG #ConsumerGoods #McCormick #Unilever #Danone #Huel #Thorne #LCatterton #DirtyShirley #Sazerac #Glossier #Ferrero #GeneralMills #PrivateEquity #MergersAndAcquisitions #UnpackagedGoods #DeeterDigest #BusinessStrategy #Entrepreneurship #VentureCapital