EP. 392: When You Finally Stop Fawning with Laura Pasley

EP. 392: When You Finally Stop Fawning with Laura Pasley

Tired of ADHD strategies that don’t work? Start with my free training: Stop Trying to “Fix” Your ADHD. You’re Not Broken: https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup [https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup] _____ Laura Pasley is a child and youth worker in Ontario, Canada, who has spent more than a decade in intensive mental health and dual-diagnosis treatment programs for children and adolescents. She is the person who runs toward the crisis when everyone else is running away from it. After postpartum anxiety, postpartum OCD, complex trauma, and her sixth concussion, Laura started questioning whether ADHD had been part of her story all along. At 32, she finally received the diagnosis that helped her see herself differently. Not as someone who had fooled everyone. Not as someone who was not smart. As someone whose brain had been working hard to keep her alive. In this episode, Tracy and Laura talk about ADHD, trauma, fawning, concussions, crisis work, motherhood, shame, and what changes when a woman finally stops explaining every struggle through what happened to her. Laura also shares why she is now returning to school, writing a memoir, and learning to embrace being a daydreamer. If you have ever wondered whether it is ADHD, trauma, anxiety, or all of the above, this conversation offers a gentler question: what if understanding your brain is not about proving what is wrong with you, but finally seeing what has always been true? Resources Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/arttaropy [https://www.instagram.com/arttaropy] Threads: https://www.threads.com/@arttaropy [https://www.threads.com/@arttaropy] Send a Message: Your Name | Email | Message [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2316437/fan_mail/new] Explore more from me: 🧘 SHIFT: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] 📚 Free resources: https://tracyotsuka.com/learn [https://tracyotsuka.com/learn] 📖 Get the book, ADHD for Smart Ass Women: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] 🧠 Join Your ADHD Brain is A-OK Academy: https://tracyotsuka.com/aok [https://tracyotsuka.com/aok] 🌐 Visit my website: https://tracyotsuka.com/ [https://tracyotsuka.com/] ADHD isn’t a productivity problem. It’s an identity problem. That’s why most strategies don’t stick. They were not designed for how your brain actually works. If you’re ready to stop fighting your brain and start building a life that fits, start with the free training here: https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup [https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup] Connect with me: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka [https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka [https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/] Are You Ready to Discover Your Brilliance? Order Now: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] Visit our website: https://tracyotsuka.com [https://tracyotsuka.com/]...

Collect the Evidence

Stuck in an ADHD pattern that keeps repeating? SHIFT is a collection of 120 guided audio experiences designed to help you see yourself and your ADHD brain differently. Explore SHIFT here: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] _ How many times have you told yourself, “I’ll do it when I feel more confident”? When I feel ready, I’ll apply for that job. When I feel more confident, I’ll start the business. When I believe in myself more, I’ll have that hard conversation. We spend so much of our lives waiting to feel ready. More confident. More certain. More qualified. But what if we have had it backwards all along? I want to talk about why confidence does not actually come first. It does not magically appear before we take the risk, try the thing, or do something that scares us. Confidence comes after. If you have been waiting to feel ready before taking the next step, this episode will help you stop waiting for confidence and start building it. ADHD isn’t a productivity problem. It’s an identity problem. That’s why most strategies don’t stick. They were not designed for how your brain actually works. If you’re ready to stop fighting your brain and start seeing yourself differently, explore SHIFT here: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] Send a Message: Your Name | Email | Message [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2316437/fan_mail/new] Explore more from me: 🧘 SHIFT: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] 📚 Free resources: https://tracyotsuka.com/learn [https://tracyotsuka.com/learn] 📖 Get the book, ADHD for Smart Ass Women: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] 🧠 Join Your ADHD Brain is A-OK Academy: https://tracyotsuka.com/aok [https://tracyotsuka.com/aok] 🌐 Visit my website: https://tracyotsuka.com/ [https://tracyotsuka.com/] ADHD isn’t a productivity problem. It’s an identity problem. That’s why most strategies don’t stick. They were not designed for how your brain actually works. If you’re ready to stop fighting your brain and start building a life that fits, start with the free training here: https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup [https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup] Connect with me: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka [https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka [https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/] Are You Ready to Discover Your Brilliance? Order Now: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] Visit our website: https://tracyotsuka.com [https://tracyotsuka.com/]...

Episode 391: What Happens When a School Is Built for ADHD Brains

Tired of ADHD strategies that don’t work? Start with my free training: Stop Trying to “Fix” Your ADHD. You’re Not Broken: https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup [https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup] _____ Your kid got labeled the “problem.” The defiant one, the behavior kid, the one who couldn't sit still or keep up. What if the room was the thing that didn't fit? Beven Byrnes is a neurodivergent educator, nonprofit leader, and a mom of four. She's the Executive Director of Bridges Middle School in Portland, the only middle school in Oregon built specifically for students with ADHD, autism, dyslexia, and anxiety. Beven spent 25 years and raised over $15 million building environments where kids actually fit. But she didn't have her own ADHD diagnosis until this past year, at 50. Cancer treatment forced her into menopause at 45, her estrogen dropped, and the masking she'd done her whole life without knowing it stopped working. The square-peg feeling she'd carried since childhood finally made sense. Now she runs a school on one idea: behavior is communication, and the job isn't to fix the kid, it's to fix the environment around them. In this episode, Tracy and Beven get into why behavior is almost always communication, what happens to a child's confidence after years of being misread, and what it looks like to build a school around how kids actually learn instead of forcing them to fit. If your child, or you, ever got treated like the problem to be solved, this one will show you what was actually broken. And it was never the brain. Resources: Website: https://www.bridgesms.org/staff-spotlight-beven-byrnes-executive-director [https://www.bridgesms.org/staff-spotlight-beven-byrnes-executive-director] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mrs_byrnes [https://www.instagram.com/mrs_byrnes] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/beven-byrnes [https://www.linkedin.com/in/beven-byrnes] Send a Message: Your Name | Email | Message [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2316437/fan_mail/new] Explore more from me: 🧘 SHIFT: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] 📚 Free resources: https://tracyotsuka.com/learn [https://tracyotsuka.com/learn] 📖 Get the book, ADHD for Smart Ass Women: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] 🧠 Join Your ADHD Brain is A-OK Academy: https://tracyotsuka.com/aok [https://tracyotsuka.com/aok] 🌐 Visit my website: https://tracyotsuka.com/ [https://tracyotsuka.com/] ADHD isn’t a productivity problem. It’s an identity problem. That’s why most strategies don’t stick. They were not designed for how your brain actually works. If you’re ready to stop fighting your brain and start building a life that fits, start with the free training here: https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup [https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup] Connect with me: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka [https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka [https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/] Are You Ready to Discover Your Brilliance? Order Now: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] Visit our website: https://tracyotsuka.com [https://tracyotsuka.com/]...

Get Into Your Body

Stuck in an ADHD pattern that keeps repeating? SHIFT is a collection of 120 guided audio experiences designed to help you see yourself and your ADHD brain differently. Explore SHIFT here: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] _ Have you ever noticed that the harder you try to think your way out of feeling overwhelmed, the more overwhelmed you become? You replay conversations. You worry about the future. You analyze every possible outcome. You keep thinking that if you can just solve the problem, you will finally feel better. But what if thinking is not the answer? For a long time, I thought the only way to feel better was to think differently. If I could just figure it out, solve the problem, or make sense of what I was feeling, then I would finally feel better. But sometimes the fastest way to calm your brain is not to think harder. It is to start with your body. When I get into my body, my attention has somewhere else to go. Instead of replaying my thoughts, I start paying attention to what I am doing, what I see, what I hear, what I smell, and what I feel. If you have ever tried to think your way out of overwhelm and only made yourself feel worse, this episode will help you stop asking your brain to do all the work and let your body lead for a few minutes. Resources: SHIFT: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] Free resources: https://tracyotsuka.com/learn [https://tracyotsuka.com/learn] Get the book, ADHD for Smart Ass Women: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] Join Your ADHD Brain is A-OK Academy: https://tracyotsuka.com/aok [https://tracyotsuka.com/aok] Visit my website: https://tracyotsuka.com/ [https://tracyotsuka.com/] ADHD isn’t a productivity problem. It’s an identity problem. That’s why most strategies don’t stick. They were not designed for how your brain actually works. If you’re ready to stop fighting your brain and start seeing yourself differently, explore SHIFT here: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] Listen to ADHD for Smart Ass Women: Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/adhd-for-smart-ass-women-with-tracy-otsuka/id1443678424 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/adhd-for-smart-ass-women-with-tracy-otsuka/id1443678424] Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/7bG9rgwPgi8zRkQxV6ykk0 [https://open.spotify.com/show/7bG9rgwPgi8zRkQxV6ykk0] YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@tracyotsuka4796 [https://www.youtube.com/@tracyotsuka4796] Send a Message: Your Name | Email | Message [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2316437/fan_mail/new] Explore more from me: 🧘 SHIFT: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] 📚 Free resources: https://tracyotsuka.com/learn [https://tracyotsuka.com/learn] 📖 Get the book, ADHD for Smart Ass Women: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] 🧠 Join Your ADHD Brain is A-OK Academy: https://tracyotsuka.com/aok [https://tracyotsuka.com/aok] 🌐 Visit my website: https://tracyotsuka.com/ [https://tracyotsuka.com/] ADHD isn’t a productivity problem. It’s an identity problem. That’s why most strategies don’t stick. They were not designed for how your brain actually works. If you’re ready to stop fighting your brain and start building a life that fits, start with the free training here: https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup [https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup] Connect with me: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka [https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka [https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/] Are You Ready to Discover Your Brilliance? Order Now: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] Visit our website: https://tracyotsuka.com [https://tracyotsuka.com/]...

EP. 390: Can Cooking Be Therapy with Charlotte Hastings

Tired of ADHD strategies that don’t work? Start with my free training: Stop Trying to “Fix” Your ADHD. You’re Not Broken: https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup [https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup] _____ You have heard of art therapy and talk therapy. Charlotte Hastings does therapy in the kitchen, and it opens people up in a way the usual chair never quite does. Charlotte Hastings is a psychodynamic therapist, founder of Kitchen Therapy, and author of Kitchen Therapy: How to Become a Conscious Cook. Trained first as an anthropologist, she taught drama to neurodivergent teenagers before building an entire therapeutic approach around the kitchen. Charlotte recognized her own ADHD in her forties, after years of self-medicating and a chaotic childhood with an undiagnosed, alcoholic father. School had convinced her she was not smart. Anthropology, Jung, and eventually a wooden spoon proved otherwise. Now she uses cooking the way other therapists use art or drama: a side-by-side, low-pressure space where the real stuff surfaces. In this episode, Tracy and Charlotte talk about why cooking can work like art or drama therapy, why food and love are so entwined, how recipes can both support and shut down ADHD brains, and why the way you hold a wooden spoon might reveal the way you hold life. If cooking has ever felt loaded, boring, chaotic, or impossible, this conversation offers a gentler reframe: the meal is not just the result. The journey is the meal. Resources * Website: https://therapykitchen.co.uk [https://therapykitchen.co.uk] * Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/therapy.kitchen [https://www.instagram.com/therapy.kitchen] Send a Message: Your Name | Email | Message [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2316437/fan_mail/new] Explore more from me: 🧘 SHIFT: https://tracyotsuka.com/shift [https://tracyotsuka.com/shift] 📚 Free resources: https://tracyotsuka.com/learn [https://tracyotsuka.com/learn] 📖 Get the book, ADHD for Smart Ass Women: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] 🧠 Join Your ADHD Brain is A-OK Academy: https://tracyotsuka.com/aok [https://tracyotsuka.com/aok] 🌐 Visit my website: https://tracyotsuka.com/ [https://tracyotsuka.com/] ADHD isn’t a productivity problem. It’s an identity problem. That’s why most strategies don’t stick. They were not designed for how your brain actually works. If you’re ready to stop fighting your brain and start building a life that fits, start with the free training here: https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup [https://programs.tracyotsuka.com/signup] Connect with me: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka [https://www.instagram.com/tracyotsuka] Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka [https://www.facebook.com/heytracyotsuka] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/tracyotsuka/] Are You Ready to Discover Your Brilliance? Order Now: https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book [https://tracyotsuka.com/adhd-book] Visit our website: https://tracyotsuka.com [https://tracyotsuka.com/]...