the fear of becoming self-centered

the fear of becoming self-centered

Do you worry that if you start prioritizing your needs or voicing your opinions, that you will become a selfish or self-centered person? This is a fear I have heard expressed over the years as women worked to separate their worth from others’ approval. In this episode, I explore possible origins of this fear and the importance of being in the middle, the place of both/and, when communicating our needs and voicing our opinions. I also share strategies for getting there. Here is the link to the episode where I introduce the swing between appeasing and disconnecting: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590484/episodes/19072391 To learn more from Deb, Visit her website at https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/ [https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/] for information about her online courses and free info sheets and guides designed to support you as you navigate life’s challenges.  If you struggle with feeling good enough, check out her book Never Enough—Separating Self-Worth from Approval. [https://amzn.to/45exhwp] To help other women find this podcast, please consider leaving a review. Here’s how        —on Apple Podcasts: open the app, find this podcast, scroll           down and tap “Write a Review”         —on Spotify: open the podcast page and tap the stars Thank you. Your review doesn’t need to be eloquent, and it will help women discover the show. If you’d like to support the making of Blooming Outside the Lines, you can do so here: ko-fi.com/bloomingoutsidethelines There is no expectation—please do what is responsive to you. Listening and sharing are also meaningful ways of supporting the podcast.

when life takes you somewhere you didn't expect

Life can sure take us on unexpected journeys—some rewarding and others incredibly painful. Facing those unforeseen circumstances was the subject of a blog post I wrote years ago—a post inspired by a letter to the Dear Abby column and published in the Bozeman Daily Chronicle. In the letter, Emily Perl Kingsley shares her experience of giving birth to a child with special needs. In this episode, I reflect on how the author’s experience helped me face the loss of the dream of having biological children, and how the author’s perspectives might offer validation and comfort as we face the changes and losses associated with aging or other unexpected life events.  To learn more from Deb, Visit her website at https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/ [https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/] for information about her online courses and free info sheets and guides designed to support you as you navigate life’s challenges.  If you struggle with feeling good enough, check out her book Never Enough—Separating Self-Worth from Approval. [https://amzn.to/45exhwp] To help other women find this podcast, please consider leaving a review. Here’s how        —on Apple Podcasts: open the app, find this podcast, scroll           down and tap “Write a Review”         —on Spotify: open the podcast page and tap the stars Thank you. Your review doesn’t need to be eloquent, and it will help women discover the show. If you’d like to support the making of Blooming Outside the Lines, you can do so here: ko-fi.com/bloomingoutsidethelines There is no expectation—please do what is responsive to you. Listening and sharing are also meaningful ways of supporting the podcast.

the need to explain—and explain

Do you find yourself repeatedly caught up in trying to explain yourself and end up feeling let down, or maybe uncared for when your explanations fall on deaf ears? In this episode, I examine the connection between gaining understanding and feeling okay or worthy, the connection between sameness and love, as well as strategies to begin separating your worth from the responses of others. To learn more from Deb, ¨    Visit her website at https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/ [https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/] for information about her online courses and free info sheets and guides designed to support you as you navigate life’s challenges.  If you struggle with feeling good enough, check out her book Never Enough—Separating Self-Worth from Approval. [https://amzn.to/45exhwp] To help other women find this podcast, please consider leaving a review. Here’s how        —on Apple Podcasts: open the app, find this podcast, scroll           down and tap “Write a Review”         —on Spotify: open the podcast page and tap the stars Thank you. Your review doesn’t need to be eloquent, and it will help women discover the show. If you’d like to support the making of Blooming Outside the Lines, you can do so here: ko-fi.com/bloomingoutsidethelines There is no expectation—please do what is responsive to you. Listening and sharing are also meaningful ways of supporting the podcast.

tools for connecting with your wisdom and strength

For many of us, it's hard to move from using others' opinions as the yardstick for what to do and how to feel to trusting our own wisdom.  In this episode, I share two tools or concepts that may help you bridge that gap—the concept of Entelechy and the idea of connecting with your wisest self. I also share a guided meditation that provides an opportunity for you to practice using these tools. If you enjoyed this meditation, there are others available on my website. creatingchoicesdeblang.com. [https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/guided-meditations-for-relaxation-and-self-care/] To learn more from Deb, Visit her website at https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/ [https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/] for information about her online courses and free info sheets and guides designed to support you as you navigate life’s challenges.  If you struggle with feeling good enough, check out her book Never Enough—Separating Self-Worth from Approval. [https://amzn.to/45exhwp] To help other women find this podcast, please consider leaving a review. Here’s how        —on Apple Podcasts: open the app, find this podcast, scroll           down and tap “Write a Review”         —on Spotify: open the podcast page and tap the stars Thank you. Your review doesn’t need to be eloquent, and it will help women discover the show. If you’d like to support the making of Blooming Outside the Lines, you can do so here: ko-fi.com/bloomingoutsidethelines There is no expectation—please do what is responsive to you. Listening and sharing are also meaningful ways of supporting the podcast.

never enough—is this fear really yours?

What if you realized your fear of being good enough was actually someone else’s fear? Would it help you to let it go? In this episode, I discuss inherited fears, how old fears remain alive and well when isolated in the brain, and how, instead of fearing being enough, we need to work on recognizing the pressure we feel to be enough as an outdated, inherited fear.    Link to episode with study of mice and cherry blossoms: https://www.buzzsprout.com/2590484/episodes/18891699 To contact me with your feedback: info@creatingchoicesdeblang.com To learn more from Deb, Visit her website at https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/ [https://creatingchoicesdeblang.com/] for information about her online courses and free info sheets and guides designed to support you as you navigate life’s challenges.  ¨    If you struggle with feeling good enough, check out her book Never Enough—Separating Self-Worth from Approval. [https://amzn.to/45exhwp] To help other women find this podcast, please consider leaving a review. Here’s how        —on Apple Podcasts: open the app, find this podcast, scroll           down and tap “Write a Review”         —on Spotify: open the podcast page and tap the stars Thank you. Your review doesn’t need to be eloquent, and it will help women discover the show. If you’d like to support the making of Blooming Outside the Lines, you can do so here: ko-fi.com/bloomingoutsidethelines There is no expectation—please do what is responsive to you. Listening and sharing are also meaningful ways of supporting the podcast.