Raising Teens with Collett Smart

To hear more Money: Faith & Finance, click on this apple podcast link:  https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/money-faith-finance/id1656825243 Teenagers earning money and paying you board? What about adult kids living under your roof? Joni asked Pete and Ben to get stuck into the family affair of working out if your kids with jobs need to stump up. So they did, diving deeper than their kneejerk response of "YES". Growing up with the expectation of paying board, Pete and Ben acknowledge the changed landscape of home ownership and accessibility. But the life lesson of paying board remains, as well as the opportunity to live out biblical principles of respect. Key Takeaways: * Financial Responsibility: Charging board teaches young adults to manage finances and prepares them for independent living. * Family Dynamics: Open communication about finances and responsibilities can reduce tension and foster understanding among family members. * Economic Landscape: Rising costs of living and rental rates contribute to adult children staying home longer. * Adapting Traditions: Modern families may need to adjust traditional approaches to rent and board, weighing financial necessity against educational opportunity. * Value-Based Discussions: Families can leverage biblical principles, such as honouring parents, to guide discussions about board. Notable Quotes: * "Shouldn't they, in a sense, contribute to the cost of the house? And I think the answer is yes." – Pete Burrows * "In adulthood, spoiler alert, you're going to cop 100% of the cost of living." – Pete Burrows * "We're trying to prepare you for adulthood. And in adulthood…you need to pay a percentage of those costs." – Pete Burrows * "Is it more about while you're here, we're trying to teach you a lesson?" – Ben McEachen   Got a question, comment or personal story to share? Send it through at hopepodcasts.com.au [https://hope1032.com.au/show/money/]. Ben and Pete will get stuck into it on a future episode. Pete Burrows is an accountant for small business and individuals with Lower Russell and Farr [https://www.lrf.com.au/] in Penrith, Western Sydney, Australia. Ben McEachen hosts Hope Mornings on Hope 103.2FM [https://hope1032.com.au/programs/hope-mornings/] in Sydney, Australia. Support the show: https://hope1032.com.au/donate [https://hope1032.com.au/donate] See omnystudio.com/listener [https://omnystudio.com/listener] for privacy information.

About the Guest: Dr. Jay-Lee Nair is an esteemed Australian sports psychologist with deep expertise in performance anxiety among young athletes. Residing in Singapore since 2012, she specializes in strategies to help high achievers and perfectionists thrive in competitive sports. Her impactful work in psychology and sports spans from her educational pursuits in the United States, where she earned Academic All American Honors while playing collegiate golf. Dr. Nair's passion is further evidenced by her book "Good Sport [https://www.booktopia.com.au/good-sport-dr-jay-lee-nair/book/9781761280429.html?srsltid=AfmBOooeTBsYy17YpksU32PKC-clijgg_x7ZZpI7s2W517LEyTKb0il1]," reflecting her commitment to leveraging her experiences and insights for the betterment of young athletes globally. Key Takeaways: * Parental Role in Sports: The importance of parents acting as collaborators rather than directors in their children's athletic development, providing support through attentional silence and non-verbal encouragement. * Handling Performance Anxiety: Young athletes should focus on controllable elements within their performance to mitigate anxiety linked to results-focused thinking. * Effective Post-Game Debriefing: Introducing the "Good Better How" methodology helps to ensure debriefs are constructive and focused on strengths and areas for improvement. * Gender-Specific Insights: The role of relationships and community in keeping girls engaged in sports through their teenage years. * Promoting the Green Zone: Fostering a culture where athletes are encouraged to react positively to mistakes can help them develop resilience and maintain strong performances. Notable Quotes: * "Help young athletes connect with their strengths and that just takes conversations, questions, helping them build their independent awareness." * "Pointing out their mistakes just exacerbates their dilemmas when it comes to competition." * "When athletes get to a certain age, the focus on improvement shifts to scrutiny of mistakes and technical perfection." * "Mistakes are statistics. If we prioritize reactions to mistakes, they develop resilience in their games." * "My hope is that all young athletes embrace and learn their strengths and start to transfer that to every other part of their life." Resources: * Dr. Jay-Lee Nair's book: Good Sport [https://www.booktopia.com.au/good-sport-dr-jay-lee-nair/book/9781761280429.html?srsltid=AfmBOooeTBsYy17YpksU32PKC-clijgg_x7ZZpI7s2W517LEyTKb0il1] * Follow Dr. Jay-Lee on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/jaylee_nair]    Click here [info@raisingteenagers.com.au] to contact Collett or ask her a question or Click here [https://hope1032.com.au/show/raising-teens/] to contact the Raising Teens team. ---------------------------------------- Collett is a psychologist, qualified teacher, speaker, and internationally published author, with 25 years' experience working in private and public schools, as well as in private practice. Visit Raising Teens [http://raisingteens.au/] for more resources, click here [https://collettsmart.com/resources/] for Collett's books, or join the discussion on Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/collettsmart/]. Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au [http://www.hopepodcasts.com.au/]. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app [https://hope1032.com.au/listen/#apps], Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/Hope103.2] or Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/sydneyshope1032/]. Support the show: https://hope1032.com.au/donate [https://hope1032.com.au/donate] See omnystudio.com/listener [https://omnystudio.com/listener] for privacy information.

For more episodes of "Undistracted with Laura Bennett" subscribe here on Apple Podcasts [https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/undistracted-with-laura-bennett/id1563350723] and Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/1YPWTGEVnpdBmKj8eQoeYP?si=fbb18acd29fc44ea] Join host Laura Bennett as she delves into parenting with psychologist, teacher, and author Colett Smart. Explore strategies for managing school-related stress, fostering children's identity beyond academics and activities, and maintaining healthy family dynamics. Colette shares insights into balancing extracurricular commitments, approaching other parents' expectations, and the impact of adult stress on children. Discover how to raise teens with intention and purpose, emphasizing the importance of staying present and engaged.  Key Takeaways: * Navigating Change: Colette discusses how any form of change, even positive, induces stress and suggests approaching a new school year with a mindset that embraces both excitement and challenges. * Emotional Load: She highlights the emotional burden parents and children carry during transitions, advocating for early intervention and support if stress becomes overwhelming. * Balancing Activities: Encourages parents to support their children's passions but maintain a healthy balance to ensure time for social interactions and relaxation. * Parental Influence: Stresses the importance of modeling positive responses to stress and maintaining open communication to alleviate children's anxieties. * Social Engagements: Advocates for clear communication among parents to manage expectations regarding children's social activities, making these experiences enjoyable without overwhelming commitments. Notable Quotes: * "All change can cause some form of stress, but it also brings exciting opportunities for growth." – Colett Smart * "You need to be the voice for your children and get them support early on." – Colett Smart * "Try to expand and make sure that they have other avenues where they reach out to others." – Colett Smart * "Someone needs to be brave enough to start the discussion... most parents are relieved." – Colett Smart * "We need to give our children hope and talk about what they can bring to the world." – Colett Smart Resources: * Colett Smart’s book: "They’ll Be Okay: 15 Conversations to Help Your Child Through Troubled Times [https://collettsmart.com/resources/]" * Listen to Undistracted with Laura Bennett here on Apple Podcasts [https://podcasts.apple.com/au/podcast/undistracted-with-laura-bennett/id1563350723] Support the show: https://hope1032.com.au/donate [https://hope1032.com.au/donate] See omnystudio.com/listener [https://omnystudio.com/listener] for privacy information.

Key Takeaways: * Embrace the busy and often unpredictable nature of the festive season with a mindset of self-compassion and adaptability. * Family traditions may evolve over time, and it’s okay for things to look different year to year. * Practicing mindfulness and taking time for personal reflection can be crucial for mental health during busy times. * Asking for help and setting boundaries can mitigate overwhelming feelings during the holiday season. * Finding joy amidst change and nostalgia is essential, even when family members are geographically apart. Notable Quotes: * "The Christmas period is actually quite different this year for me to what I've experienced before." – Colett Smart * "Too late for whom? Whose rules are those?" – Colett Smart * "It's okay that I'm missing my other children... I'm giving myself permission to feel nostalgic." – Colett Smart Resources: * Listen to the episode "When it’s Not the Most Wonderful Time of Year [https://open.spotify.com/episode/64Z54TECwIgmSJ7thXoY28?si=d8d3eb19b59c4c0b]" for coping strategies during difficult holidays. * Explore insights on self-compassion with Dr. Veya Seekis' episode here [https://open.spotify.com/episode/0dHtdiyORcE46weAmyzj6u?si=3e2ffd0b4eb14e8a]    Click here [info@raisingteenagers.com.au] to contact Collett or ask her a question or Click here [https://hope1032.com.au/show/raising-teens/] to contact the Raising Teens team. ---------------------------------------- Collett is a psychologist, qualified teacher, speaker, and internationally published author, with 25 years' experience working in private and public schools, as well as in private practice. Visit Raising Teens [http://raisingteens.au/] for more resources, click here [https://collettsmart.com/resources/] for Collett's books, or join the discussion on Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/collettsmart/]. Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au [http://www.hopepodcasts.com.au/]. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app [https://hope1032.com.au/listen/#apps], Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/Hope103.2] or Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/sydneyshope1032/]. Support the show: https://hope1032.com.au/donate [https://hope1032.com.au/donate] See omnystudio.com/listener [https://omnystudio.com/listener] for privacy information.

Check Susanne's website out - https://www.susannegerstmyer.com/ [https://www.susannegerstmyer.com/] "I help way too busy mums break the cycle of overwhelm  and enjoy life more" ~ Susanne Gerstmyer Join Colette Smart as she explores the theme of busyness with guest Susanne Gerstmyer, author of "Breaking Free of Busy [https://www.susannegerstmyer.com/book]." They unpack the mental and emotional aspects of a packed schedule, the impact on family dynamics, and offer practical strategies to prioritise connection over perfection. Susanne shares her journey from burnout to balance and offers insights into making intentional choices to reclaim time and energy. This ep provides valuable reflections for parents navigating the demands of raising teens while fostering meaningful relationships and self-awareness. Key Takeaways: * Susanne Gerstmyer emphasises that the root of busyness goes beyond schedules and tasks, stemming from internal beliefs and emotions. * The different dimensions of busyness include practical, mental, and emotional aspects, which must be managed comprehensively for effective change. * Recognise the unrealistic societal deadline mindset often associated with end-of-year schedules and the importance of simplifying tasks. * The emotional climate set by parents heavily influences family dynamics; prioritising connection over perfection is vital. * Introspection into why we overcommit is crucial; understanding the need for validation or the fear of failure can help manage tendencies towards busyness. Notable Quotes: * "Who we are is far more important and impactful than anything we do." * "I realised that it's okay for other people to be unhappy or to be inconvenienced." * "When we're too busy, we often miss some of those subtle signals and cues about what's going on with our families." * "Trying to choose connection over perfection and recognising that it's when we're actually just being real and not trying to make everything perfect." * "My hope is that families would really be able to be intentional about that and in doing so, enjoy the season and show up as the best that they can be rather than a busy, crazy person."   Click here [info@raisingteenagers.com.au] to contact Collett or ask her a question or Click here [https://hope1032.com.au/show/raising-teens/] to contact the Raising Teens team. ---------------------------------------- Collett is a psychologist, qualified teacher, speaker, and internationally published author, with 25 years' experience working in private and public schools, as well as in private practice. Visit Raising Teens [http://raisingteens.au/] for more resources, click here [https://collettsmart.com/resources/] for Collett's books, or join the discussion on Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/collettsmart/]. Listen to more from our Hope Podcasts collection at hopepodcasts.com.au [http://www.hopepodcasts.com.au/]. And send the team a message via Hope 103.2’s app [https://hope1032.com.au/listen/#apps], Facebook [https://www.facebook.com/Hope103.2] or Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/sydneyshope1032/]. Support the show: https://hope1032.com.au/donate [https://hope1032.com.au/donate] See omnystudio.com/listener [https://omnystudio.com/listener] for privacy information.