That's Where I'm At

What are Two Things you could do to improve your relationships? Perhaps you’ve heard the way you do one thing is the way you do everything. You see, your mind doesn’t know the difference between past, present, and future. Changing how you think and feel about emotionally stressful times in your life can shift everything! Dawn works to help people find and maintain their ideal relationships. Dawn has Board Designations for Hypnosis & NLP Training & Coaching. She also is an Accredited Certified EFT Practitioner and EFT Relationship and Intimacy Coach.  In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura and guest Dawn, a relationship and intimacy coach, discuss healing from past relationship trauma. They explore the impact of past experiences on self-worth, the importance of sharing stories, and practical healing methods like EFT and hypnosis. Dawn shares insights on recognizing unconscious beliefs and setting healthy boundaries, while Laura reflects on her own healing journey. Together, they encourage listeners to prioritize self-care, seek supportive connections, and embrace personal growth on the path to healthier, more fulfilling relationships. Transition from Massage Therapy to Emotional Healing (00:02:25) Dawn describes her journey from massage therapy to emotional release and mind-body healing techniques. The Body’s Response to Stress and Trauma (00:03:15) Discussion on how the brain and body hold onto stress and trauma, affecting physical and emotional health. Unconscious Mind and Relationship Patterns (00:04:26) Dawn explains the unconscious mind’s role in shaping relationship behaviors and reactions. Clearing Emotional Blocks and Beliefs (00:05:27) Dawn details how she uses tapping, hypnosis, and other techniques to clear limiting beliefs and emotional blocks. Adjusting to Healthy Relationships After Toxic Ones (00:06:17) Conversation about how healthy relationships can feel “boring” after chaos, and how to identify and accept positive traits. Self-Worth, Value, and Gaslighting (00:08:49) Laura discusses the impact of gaslighting and the importance of reclaiming self-worth after narcissistic abuse. Personal Story of Lost Self-Worth (00:10:08) Dawn shares her experience of losing self-worth in an abusive relationship and the journey to regain her power. Unpacking Childhood Beliefs and Patterns (00:12:45) Dawn explains how early childhood experiences shape beliefs and how hypnotherapy can gently address these patterns. Setting Goals and Somatic Therapies (00:14:43) Dawn emphasizes individualized healing journeys, the value of somatic therapies, and creating permanent change. Overcoming Fear of Being Alone (00:16:38) Discussion on helping clients who fear being alone, and how to find safety and self-worth outside of relationships. Recognizing Red Flags and Elevated Self-Value (00:18:32) Laura and Dawn discuss how self-work makes it easier to spot red flags and walk away from unhealthy relationships. Letting Go for Healthier Relationships (00:19:01) Dawn explains the importance of releasing relationships that aren’t right for both parties’ growth. RESOURCES: * YOU’RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE [https://form.jotform.com/laurarichpodcast/youre-not-crazy-ebook-freebie] * MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE [https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards] * FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com [http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/] * PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ [https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/] * COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura] FOLLOW GUEST: LINKS: https://linktr.ee/unifiedmind [https://linktr.ee/unifiedmind] WEBSITE: https://UnifiedMind.info [https://unifiedmind.info/] TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@relationshipmechanics [https://www.tiktok.com/@relationshipmechanics] INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/therelationshipmechanic/ [https://www.instagram.com/therelationshipmechanic/] FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/dawn.bennett.5055/ [https://www.facebook.com/dawn.bennett.5055/] Produced and edited by Resilient Voice Media. Visit us at www.resilientvoicemedia.com [https://www.resilientvoicemedia.com/]

In this powerful episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura sits down with J Lumen, a certified Life Transformation and Empowerment Coach who knows firsthand what it means to feel completely trapped in life. J's story takes a shocking turn when what started as feeling stuck in the wrong relationship and wrong job escalated to a terrifying night that ended with her ex-boyfriend's arrest for attempted murder—her attempted murder. This life-altering experience became the catalyst for J to stop tolerating her life and start truly living it. Through her "Unknown Bucket List Approach," J teaches others how to make "micro shifts" that lead to major life transformations. This conversation dives deep into overcoming the fear of judgment, recognizing the power of "mini moments," building what J calls a "force field of resilience," and learning to live without regret. J shares practical strategies for those feeling trapped by circumstances, guilt, or doubt, showing how to break free from the cycle of tolerance and step into a life worth celebrating. J Lumen is a certified Life Transformation and Empowerment Coach who understands intimately what it means to feel trapped in the wrong life. After years of being stuck in an unfulfilling relationship where she knew she'd say no if proposed to, and a job she hated but felt financially obligated to keep, J made the difficult decision to pay for her boyfriend to move over 1000 miles away to live with his family. Two months later, he returned unexpectedly, and the night ended with his arrest for attempted murder—her attempted murder. This traumatic wake-up call became the turning point that transformed J from someone who was merely surviving to someone truly thriving. She created "The Unknown Bucket List Approach," a methodology focused on making "micro shifts" and collecting "mini moments" to create meaningful life changes. J is passionate about helping others stop tolerating their lives and start living without regret, teaching that you don't have to wait for major life upheavals to begin creating the life you want. Her philosophy centers on the belief that "if you're not dead, you're not done" and that everyone deserves to live a life they don't regret. Key Topics Discussed: * From Trapped to Taking Action: Feeling stuck in the wrong relationship and wrong job, and the difficult decision to change her circumstances * The Attempted Murder Wake-Up Call: How surviving a life-threatening situation became the catalyst for complete life transformation * The Unknown Bucket List Approach: J's methodology for identifying overlooked achievements and leveraging them for future growth * Micro Shifts vs. Major Overhauls: Why small, intentional changes are more sustainable and effective than waiting for big life events * Mini Moments That Matter: Learning to recognize and celebrate small achievements that build momentum for larger goals * Overcoming Fear of Judgment: Strategies for dealing with criticism from family, friends, and colleagues when making life changes * Building a Force Field of Resilience: Creating strong boundaries that protect your energy and maintain your progress * The Tolerance Trap: How society teaches us to "suck it up" and why this mindset keeps us stuck in unfulfilling lives * Living Without Regret: The philosophy of making decisions based on what you'll regret least, not what others expect * Collecting Your Past Wins: How to look back at your life and recognize achievements you've been dismissing as insignificant * The Balance of Time: Living like life is both short and long—urgent enough to take action, patient enough to build sustainably * Redefining Success: Moving from external validation to internal satisfaction and authentic self-expression * Supporting Others vs. Self-Care: How to maintain relationships while prioritizing your own growth and boundaries Powerful Quotes from the Episode "Life happens. And it's good or bad. It's unexpected, random, unplanned... And then we have to react. And that's what shift happens." "We don't have to wait for that shift to happen before we start living the life that we don't regret." "If you're not dead, you're not done." "It's just about living a life that you don't regret because it is yours. So you should live the one you want without fear or influence." "If you are wanting to do this and also this, then you decide which one you're going to regret the least. And you do that." "You can look back at your life and you can start seeing all the things that you've done and that you've experienced and you can basically uncover the bucket list of your life that you've been living." "Most people would not even give themselves enough credit... But those are the little mini moments that I'm talking about." "Once your way of thinking has been shifted, you'll never go back." "We're taught as adults that we have to suck it up and tolerate so many things... No, so who? That's a story." "Live like life is short and live like life is long. And it's about finding the balance in between." Resources Host Laura's Resources: * YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE [https://form.jotform.com/laurarichpodcast/youre-not-crazy-ebook-freebie] * MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE [https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards] * COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura] * PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ [https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/] J Lumen's Resources: * Website: The Unknown Bucket List - stop waiting and start living [https://theunknownbucketlist.com/] * Free Life Assessment: https://resumeyourlife.com/ [https://resumeyourlife.com/] * LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jlumen8 [http://www.linkedin.com/in/jlumen8] * Instagram: @theunknownbucketlist [https://www.instagram.com/theunknownbucketlist/] * Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theunknownbucketlist/ [https://www.facebook.com/theunknownbucketlist/] * TikTok: @theunknownbucketlist [https://www.tiktok.com/@theunknownbucketlist] Connect with the Show * Follow the Podcast: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com [http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/] * Host: Laura, podcast host and author focused on healing from narcissistic abuse * Mission: Sharing stories with women in the middle of the mess, showing up bravely as they heal * Community: Creating space for women to learn, grow, and heal together through shared experiences Loved this episode? J's story proves that our worst moments can become the catalyst for our greatest transformations. Her journey from feeling trapped and tolerating life to creating a methodology that helps others thrive shows that "shift happens"—and we don't have to wait for tragedy to start living the life we deserve. Sometimes the most powerful changes begin with the smallest shifts, and every mini moment matters in building the life you won't regret. Produced and edited by Resilient Voice Media. Visit us at www.resilientvoicemedia.com [https://www.resilientvoicemedia.com/]

Welcome back to That’s Where I’m At! In the last two episodes, we talked about healing after narcissistic abuse, rebuilding trust in yourself, and setting boundaries. Today, we’re going even deeper as we focus on reclaiming your identity, learning to dream again, and moving from surviving to truly thriving. If you’ve been feeling stuck, wondering who you are now, or questioning if you even deserve a joyful future, this episode is for you. Laura breaks down three essential healing truths:💥 You are not meant to go back to who you were before the abuse—you are meant to move forward and make the best parts of yourself even stronger.💥 It's never too late to dream again—your past doesn’t define your future, and your dreams are still possible.💥 Thriving doesn’t mean being happy all the time; it’s about feeling free and having the ability to navigate life with resilience and self-trust. What You’ll Learn:✨ How to reconnect with the person you are today and start rebuilding your identity✨ Why it’s never too late to dream, and how to start dreaming again✨ The difference between surviving and thriving, and how to take the next step toward a life that excites you Resources & Support:💫 Ready to take your healing journey deeper? Join Laura’s Midlife Reset Masterclass—a 10-week program focused on rebuilding your self-worth, setting boundaries, rediscovering your dreams, and creating a fulfilling life.👉 Midlife Reset Masterclass [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/midlife-reset] 💜 Need support on your healing journey? Book your No More Sleepless Nights discovery call.👉 Free Discovery Call [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/free-gift-from-laura] Let’s Connect:📸 Instagram: @thatswhereimatpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast]🌐 Website: ThatsWhereImAtPodcast.com [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/]📚 Read Laura’s bestselling book: Married to a "Nice" Guy👉 Book Store [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store] If this episode resonated with you...Please rate, review, and share! Every listen helps another woman feel less alone on her journey. 💜 Produced and edited by Resilient Voice Media. Visit us at www.resilientvoicemedia.com [https://www.resilientvoicemedia.com/].

In this inspiring episode of "That's Where I'm At" podcast, host Laura welcomes Lori Daneke, a communication and relationship coach who discovered her calling later in life. Lori shares her powerful journey from being a people-pleaser trapped in a silent, emotionally abusive marriage to becoming an empowered coach helping others find their authentic selves. What started as a quest to improve her golf game led to a complete life transformation at age 58. Through candid conversation, Lori explains how 90% of our thoughts aren't our own, stemming from our imprint years (ages 0-7), and how breakthrough work can help us release the emotional baggage we've been carrying. Her story demonstrates that it's truly never too late to make changes, use your voice, and ask for what you want. Lori Daneke is a communication and relationship coach with master certifications in NLP, TLT, Hypnotherapy, Reiki Level 3, and Huna, as well as Advanced Trauma and Addiction training. With over 300 hours of training and having coached over 100 clients, she specializes in supporting women in creating the life they desire and deserve while embracing their authentic selves. Lori's journey into coaching began unexpectedly at age 58 when seeking to improve her golf game led to discovering that golf and life are direct reflections of each other. She is a proud grandmother of three (with another grandchild on the way) and finds her happy places playing with her grandchildren and going to the beach. Key Topics Discussed: * The Connection Between Golf and Life: How Lori's quest to improve her golf game revealed deeper life patterns * The Four Voices in Our Head: Understanding the inner child, inner critic, inner ego, and intuition * People-Pleasing Patterns: The dangers of living according to others' expectations rather than your authentic self * Silent Abuse: Recognizing emotional abuse through withholding communication and attention * The 90% Rule: How most of our thoughts come from our imprint years (ages 0-7) rather than our true selves * Breakthrough Process: Lori's 10-step method for uncovering root causes and aligning conscious and unconscious minds * Releasing Emotional Baggage: Using the analogy of travel luggage to understand letting go of past trauma * Finding Your Purpose: How it's never too late to discover your authentic calling and voice Powerful Quotes from the Episode "It'd be grateful for what you have experienced, take the learnings from it, so you can have even more gratitude and love yourself. Because truly, it's never too late to make choices and use your voice and ask for what you want." "In my marriage, I couldn't do that. I wasn't allowed. It was very transactional. And when I asked for what I needed or what I wanted, I got crickets. So that was the abuse that I tolerated. And I tolerated it is silence." "I discovered that not only that golf and life are direct reflections of each other. So what was going on in my golf game was going on in my life. I was angry, frustrated, felt like I was isolated and alone." "90% of our thoughts are not our own. They come from our imprint years or zero to seven... we learned what we learned from the people from the people that are closest to us." "I was the definition of a people pleaser. I did everything that everybody thought I was supposed to do and everybody told me what I was supposed to do." "You can't help other people unless you help yourself first... because you haven't released the blocks around what is actually holding you back from getting what you want." "Everything that happens to us, good, bad, or ugly, is there to teach us a lesson. And the lessons we learn is something positive and it's going forward." "It's never too late to discover that voice and that authentic you, your true purpose in life and what you were put on this planet to do." RESOURCES: * MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE [https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards] * PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ [https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/] * FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com [http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/] * BOOKS & JOURNALS: https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards [https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards] * RESOURCES FOR YOUR HEALING: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/resources [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/resources] * FOLLOW LORI: * EMAIL: hockeymomld18@rogers.com [hockeymomld18@rogers.com] * FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/lori.danecke [https://www.facebook.com/lori.danecke] Loved this episode? Connect with Lori through her Facebook pages or email to learn more about her breakthrough coaching process. Don't forget to leave a review on Apple Podcasts and Spotify to help others find these stories of hope and healing!   Produced and edited by Resilient Voice Media. Visit us at www.resilientvoicemedia.com [https://www.resilientvoicemedia.com/].

In today’s episode, Laura explores the important topics of self-worth, core values, and boundaries—three crucial elements of your healing journey after leaving a toxic relationship. If you're feeling stuck or questioning why you don’t feel "better" yet, this episode is for you. Laura breaks down three essential healing truths:💥 Healing doesn’t happen overnight—leaving the relationship is only the first step.💥 Rebuilding your self-worth is a process that takes time and practice.💥 Setting boundaries is an act of self-love, and it’s essential for protecting your peace. Expect real talk, actionable advice, and a dose of empowerment to help you move forward. What You’ll Learn:✨ How to begin rebuilding self-worth after emotional abuse✨ Why knowing your core values is key to making empowered choices✨ Why boundaries are essential—and how to start setting them Resources & Support:💫 Ready to go deeper into this work? Join Laura’s Midlife Reset Masterclass—a 10-week journey to confidence, freedom, and joy.👉 Midlife Reset Masterclass [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/midlife-reset] 💜 Need someone to talk to? Book your free discovery call, No More Sleepless Nights, and let’s explore your healing journey.👉 Free Discovery Call [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/free-gift-from-laura] Let’s Connect:📸 Instagram: @thatswhereimatpodcast [https://www.instagram.com/thatswhereimatpodcast]🌐 Website: ThatsWhereImAtPodcast.com [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/]📚 Read Laura’s bestselling book: Married to a "Nice" Guy👉 Book Store [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store] If this episode resonated with you...Please rate, review, and share! Every listen helps another woman feel less alone on her journey. 💜 Produced and edited by Resilient Voice Media. Visit us at www.resilientvoicemedia.com [https://www.resilientvoicemedia.com/].