#110 The Psychology of Ecstasy: Barbara Carrellas on Tantra, Desire & Human Flourishing

#110 The Psychology of Ecstasy: Barbara Carrellas on Tantra, Desire & Human Flourishing

What if sexuality wasn't simply about pleasure—but about becoming more fully alive? Grab your Splashblanket here [https://splashblanket.com/?gsclid=Ha2DXIJWK0mW90eUQS42BJuWafKVrTBTOerDeegaAufqEALw_wcB&soy2rce=vsf2d3adf&medum=edwd23&agn=dw1dqsdfa&ontent=fs213er&rfsn=8481925.6d9d0b&utm_source=refersion&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=8481925.6d9d0b&erm=sfasfas&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=23824482873&gbraid=0AAAABCOz9lOlZ3GOKoBu5r6E3pkfEJXDM&gclid=CjwKCAjw3ejRBhAdEiwADkqPn2erSiVZ9xc3R4HlMI9Bl-dsJj5wGyp56WpG2hDea08BYv4MngYNHhoCziYQAvD_BwE]- don't forget to use the code desire at checkout for a 10% discount! In this episode I sit down with legendary sexuality educator Barbara Carrellas, author of Urban Tantra and The Book of Ecstasy, to explore tantra, BDSM, conscious sexuality, erotic awakening, and the role pleasure plays in human flourishing. We explore: * Sexual flourishing and wellbeing. * Non-genital orgasms. * Pleasure as a pathway to healing. * Emotional armour and vulnerability. * Sexuality during the AIDS crisis. * The Book of Ecstasy. Research Artile: A new sexual wellbeing paradigm grounded in capability approach concepts of human flourishing and social justice. [https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/13691058.2022.2158236#abstract] Supporters of The Erotic Realm: * Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here [https://myfirmtech.com/desire]. * Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here [https://splashblanket.com/?rfsn=8971642.8740ff&utm_source=refersion&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=8971642.8740ff]. * ProDx Health at home STI testing here [https://prodxhealth.com/products/pro-13-home-collection-kit?variant=42594725298278&_ef_transaction_id=&oid=1&affid=94]. Innovative Sex Tech: * Lioness here [https://lioness.io/desire]. * Kiiroo here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?lp=1&offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere]. * Luxus here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere&url=https://www.kiiroo.com/products/luxus]. * Lovense here [https://www.lovense.com/r/jhgdwz]. Science-backed libido support: * Flow supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=flow10]. * Desire supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/?vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=trio]. Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠ [https://forms.gle/hK7janYNqmYHegZg6] The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://my-store-107523d.creator-spring.com/listing/new-the-erotic-realm-collectio] Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://psychologyofdesire.com/] to apply to be on the podcast. I'd love to chat to you. Thanks for listening! Stay perverted, Emma See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy [https://art19.com/privacy] and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info [https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info].

#109 The Mommy Domme: Nurturing Dominance, BDSM & the Psychology of Acceptance with Mistress Mira

What happens when dominance is expressed through care rather than control? In this episode of The Erotic Realm, I sit down with Mistress Mira — professional Dominatrix and Mommy Domme, to explore the psychology of nurturing dominance, BDSM stigma, erotic self-acceptance, and the surprising power of being fully seen. We explore: * Mommy Dommes and nurturing dominance. * Professional domination vs lifestyle BDSM. * BDSM stigma and public misconceptions. * Neurodivergence, autism, ADHD and kink. * The psychology of erotic self-discovery. Research article: Perceptions of and stigma toward BDSM practitioners. [https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/35496362/] Supporters of The Erotic Realm: * Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here [https://myfirmtech.com/desire]. * Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here [https://splashblanket.com/?rfsn=8971642.8740ff&utm_source=refersion&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=8971642.8740ff]. * ProDx Health at home STI testing here [https://prodxhealth.com/products/pro-13-home-collection-kit?variant=42594725298278&_ef_transaction_id=&oid=1&affid=94]. Innovative Sex Tech: * Lioness here [https://lioness.io/desire]. * Kiiroo here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?lp=1&offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere]. * Luxus here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere&url=https://www.kiiroo.com/products/luxus]. * Lovense here [https://www.lovense.com/r/jhgdwz]. Science-backed libido support: * Flow supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=flow10]. * Desire supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/?vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=trio]. Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠ [https://forms.gle/hK7janYNqmYHegZg6] The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://my-store-107523d.creator-spring.com/listing/new-the-erotic-realm-collectio] Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://psychologyofdesire.com/] to apply to be on the podcast. I'd love to chat to you. Thanks for listening! Stay perverted, Emma See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy [https://art19.com/privacy] and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info [https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info].

#108 The Kink Curious Wife: Marriage, Desire & Erotic Self-Discovery with J

What happens when curiosity about other people's desires leads you to discover your own? In this episode I sit down with J to explore a journey that began with curiosity and evolved into a deeper understanding of kink, intimacy, and erotic identity. Together we discuss her experiences in sex work, her fascination with the psychology of desire, and how joining FetLife to better understand other people's kinks ultimately helped her discover parts of herself she hadn't fully recognised. We explore: * Kink curiosity and self-discovery. * Introducing a partner to BDSM. * Marriage and erotic exploration. * Sex work and the psychology of desire. * Ownership dynamics and intimacy. * Women's pathways into kink. Research book: Women and Kink. [https://www.amazon.com/Women-Kink-Relationships-Reasons-Stories/dp/0367187736] Supporters of The Erotic Realm: * Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here [https://myfirmtech.com/desire]. * Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here [https://splashblanket.com/?rfsn=8971642.8740ff&utm_source=refersion&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=8971642.8740ff]. * ProDx Health at home STI testing here [https://prodxhealth.com/products/pro-13-home-collection-kit?variant=42594725298278&_ef_transaction_id=&oid=1&affid=94]. Innovative Sex Tech: * Lioness here [https://lioness.io/desire]. * Kiiroo here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?lp=1&offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere]. * Luxus here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere&url=https://www.kiiroo.com/products/luxus]. * Lovense here [https://www.lovense.com/r/jhgdwz]. Science-backed libido support: * Flow supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=flow10]. * Desire supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/?vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=trio]. Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠ [https://forms.gle/hK7janYNqmYHegZg6] The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://my-store-107523d.creator-spring.com/listing/new-the-erotic-realm-collectio] Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://psychologyofdesire.com/] to apply to be on the podcast. I'd love to chat to you. Thanks for listening! Stay perverted, Emma See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy [https://art19.com/privacy] and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info [https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info].

#107 The Porn Star's Daughter: Unbound Desire, Identity & Sexual Freedom with Laila Ocean

What happens when your earliest education about sexuality comes from growing up around the adult industry? In this episode I chat with filmmaker and storyteller Laila Ocean to explore her unique experience of being the daughter of a porn performer, and how that shaped her understanding of sexuality, relationships, stigma, freedom, and desire. Laila is currently creating Unbound, a documentary exploring sexuality, identity, and the human stories behind the adult industry. We discuss what it was like discovering her father's profession, the assumptions people make about pornography, and how growing up around adult entertainment influenced her own erotic development. Here is the International Documentary Association fundraising page to support Laila's project: https://www.documentary.org/project/unbound-crowned-pleasure [https://www.documentary.org/project/unbound-crowned-pleasure] or connect with Laila on her Instagram @laila.ocean We explore: * Growing up as the child of a porn performer. * Sexuality, stigma, and identity formation. * The making of the documentary Unbound. * Media narratives around sex work and porn. * Sexual freedom and cultural expectations. * Parenting, sexuality, and honest conversations. Research Article: Adolescents and Pornography: A Review of 20 Years of Research [https://www.google.com/url?q=https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/pdf/10.1080/00224499.2016.1143441&sa=D&source=docs&ust=1781259848140840&usg=AOvVaw0BrnUzRnLCOPcF-8unYDvA]. Supporters of The Erotic Realm: * Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here [https://myfirmtech.com/desire]. * Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here [https://splashblanket.com/?rfsn=8971642.8740ff&utm_source=refersion&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=8971642.8740ff]. * ProDx Health at home STI testing here [https://prodxhealth.com/products/pro-13-home-collection-kit?variant=42594725298278&_ef_transaction_id=&oid=1&affid=94]. Innovative Sex Tech: * Lioness here [https://lioness.io/desire]. * Kiiroo here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?lp=1&offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere]. * Luxus here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere&url=https://www.kiiroo.com/products/luxus]. * Lovense here [https://www.lovense.com/r/jhgdwz]. Science-backed libido support: * Flow supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=flow10]. * Desire supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/?vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=trio]. Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠ [https://forms.gle/hK7janYNqmYHegZg6] The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://my-store-107523d.creator-spring.com/listing/new-the-erotic-realm-collectio] Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://psychologyofdesire.com/] to apply to be on the podcast. I'd love to chat to you. Thanks for listening! Stay perverted, Emma See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy [https://art19.com/privacy] and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info [https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info].

#106 Beyond Vanilla: An Asexual Dominatrix on Power, Discipline & Consent with Ms Hyde

What happens when BDSM isn't really about sex? In this episode I chat with Ms Hyde — an asexual disciplinarian, BDSM educator, life coach, author, and craftsperson — to explore the psychology of power, discipline, communication, and consent. We explore: * Asexuality and BDSM. * The psychology of discipline. * Therapeutic spanking and meaning-making. * Beyond Vanilla and BDSM education. * Repair, accountability, and relationship growth. * Why pleasure and power are not opposites. Research Article: Making Sense of S&M: A Discourse Analytic Account. [https://www.researchgate.net/publication/224968350_Making_Sense_of_SM_A_Discourse_Analytic_Account] Supporters of The Erotic Realm: * Firm Tech for sexual health tracking here [https://myfirmtech.com/desire]. * Splash blanket for intimacy-friendly comfort here [https://splashblanket.com/?rfsn=8971642.8740ff&utm_source=refersion&utm_medium=affiliate&utm_campaign=8971642.8740ff]. * ProDx Health at home STI testing here [https://prodxhealth.com/products/pro-13-home-collection-kit?variant=42594725298278&_ef_transaction_id=&oid=1&affid=94]. Innovative Sex Tech: * Lioness here [https://lioness.io/desire]. * Kiiroo here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?lp=1&offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere]. * Luxus here [https://offers.feeliate.com/?offer=1&uid=019cad40-b99f-790a-bbc2-fa43065f6126&utm_source=YourSourceHere&url=https://www.kiiroo.com/products/luxus]. * Lovense here [https://www.lovense.com/r/jhgdwz]. Science-backed libido support: * Flow supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=flow10]. * Desire supplement here [https://hop.clickbank.net/?vendor=the20&affiliate=pofdesire&a_aid=699534217aacb&cbpage=trio]. Interested in Kinky Speed Dating? ⁠⁠⁠Register Here.⁠⁠⁠ [https://forms.gle/hK7janYNqmYHegZg6] The Erotic Realm now has it’s own merchandise! If you love the show and want to support it check it out ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://my-store-107523d.creator-spring.com/listing/new-the-erotic-realm-collectio] Visit ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠psychologyofdesire.com⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://psychologyofdesire.com/] to apply to be on the podcast. I'd love to chat to you. Thanks for listening! Stay perverted, Emma See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy [https://art19.com/privacy] and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info [https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info].