The Mind Madame

008 Stop Sabotaging Yourself: The Scared-to-Want Soldier

15 min · 24 aug 2025
aflevering 008 Stop Sabotaging Yourself: The Scared-to-Want Soldier cover

Beschrijving

Why do you freeze when you want something more? Why do you hold back at work, in love, or with family — even when you know what you want? It’s not laziness. It’s not lack of confidence. It’s your nervous system running an old mission. In this episode, I introduce you to Recon: The Scared-to-Want Soldier. He’s one of 16 “soldiers” inside my Internal Command System™ — each designed to protect you, but running outdated orders that keep you small. Here’s what you’ll learn today: ✅ The real root cause behind hesitation and self-sabotage ✅ How Recon was created (and why it made sense at the time) ✅ The everyday ways Recon shows up in your work, love, and family life ✅ A simple Stoplight Framework to interrupt him and issue new orders This is Part 1 of a 3-part series on the biggest soldiers running your life. 👉 Next week: The Withholder (relationships). www.themindmadame.com

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Alle afleveringen

10 afleveringen

aflevering 010 Detail-Oriented or Overthinking? Meet Intel, the Over-Analyzer artwork

010 Detail-Oriented or Overthinking? Meet Intel, the Over-Analyzer

You think you’re just detail-oriented. Truth is, most of the time it’s Intel — the Over-Analyzer Soldier — running outdated missions in your head. He’s the one making you hesitate, rewrite, stall, and second-guess. In this episode, I break down: Where Intel comes from and the childhood moments that wired him in. How overthinking shows up today — at work, with women, and at home. Why hesitation feels safe but kills trust, momentum, and connection. The stoplight framework (Red. Yellow. Green.) to retrain your Intel. What Balanced Intel looks like — sharp, decisive, respected. Bottom line: Overthinking isn’t protecting you. It’s an old survival pattern costing you money, sex, and peace. Time to take back command. www.themindmadame.com Instagram: www.instagram.com/themindmadame Threads: www.threads.com/themindmadame

15 sep 202525 min
aflevering 009 Why You Pull Away (Even When You Care): Meet the Withholder artwork

009 Why You Pull Away (Even When You Care): Meet the Withholder

Ever found yourself pulling back when things get real? At work, with clients, in relationships — you stay just close enough to keep things going, but never all in. You call it “playing it safe.” But underneath? It’s the Withholder running an old mission. In this episode, I’ll show you: 👉 Where the Withholder comes from (and why it’s not your fault). 👉 How he shows up as hesitation, breadcrumbing, and missed trust. 👉 Why fighting him only makes things worse. 👉 The tactical framework to step in as Commander and finally re-issue new orders. This isn’t about “commitment issues” or being “cold.” It’s about outdated survival strategies bleeding into your life — costing you money, trust, and intimacy. By the end, you’ll know how to spot the Withholder in real time — and how to replace silence with presence. www.themindmadame.com [http://www.themindmadame.com] Instagram: www.instagram.com/themindmadame [http://www.instagram.com/themindmadame] Threads: www.threads.com/themindmadame [http://www.threads.com/themindmadame]

1 sep 202524 min
aflevering 008 Stop Sabotaging Yourself: The Scared-to-Want Soldier artwork

008 Stop Sabotaging Yourself: The Scared-to-Want Soldier

Why do you freeze when you want something more? Why do you hold back at work, in love, or with family — even when you know what you want? It’s not laziness. It’s not lack of confidence. It’s your nervous system running an old mission. In this episode, I introduce you to Recon: The Scared-to-Want Soldier. He’s one of 16 “soldiers” inside my Internal Command System™ — each designed to protect you, but running outdated orders that keep you small. Here’s what you’ll learn today: ✅ The real root cause behind hesitation and self-sabotage ✅ How Recon was created (and why it made sense at the time) ✅ The everyday ways Recon shows up in your work, love, and family life ✅ A simple Stoplight Framework to interrupt him and issue new orders This is Part 1 of a 3-part series on the biggest soldiers running your life. 👉 Next week: The Withholder (relationships). www.themindmadame.com

24 aug 202515 min
aflevering 007 How to Stop People Walking All Over You (Without Blowing Up) artwork

007 How to Stop People Walking All Over You (Without Blowing Up)

Most people misunderstand boundaries. Either you avoid them completely and end up feeling taken for granted—or you go to the other extreme and cut people out the moment things get hard. Neither approach really works. In this episode, I break down: * Why boundaries can make you feel like the “bad guy” (and why that’s not true). * The difference between healthy boundaries and ultimatums. * Why your body reacts with stress the first time you enforce them. * The most common mistakes people make when trying to “draw the line.” * How to protect your peace without ruining connection. If you’re tired of over-explaining, carrying more than your share, or feeling like the only way to get respect is to go it alone—this episode will help you set boundaries that feel clear, calm, and actually stick.

17 aug 202522 min