The Cult of Calm: Polyvagal Theory and the Wellness Urge to Behave

WTF is Case Conceptualization?

We introduce our new segment NOPE! a recurring segment where we expose and challenge the myths that are told in therapy spaces. Today’s myth on trial? Evidence-Based Practice... that shiny gold standard we’re all supposed to worship, even though no one can quite define it, agree on it, or explain why it so often flattens context, culture, power, and actual human experience. In the bulk of our conversation, we zoom out to the equally confusing concept of case conceptualization. We talk how we understand what case conceptualization actually is and the problems we've seen as to how it's used in clinical work.

The Cult of Calm: Polyvagal Theory and the Wellness Urge to Behave

In this episode, we’re getting Therapissed about: How polyvagal theory has become both a helpful framework and a runaway wellness trend that sometimes flattens the very complexity it was meant to illuminate. We break down what the theory actually is, how it’s used (and misused) in therapy, and why getting back to “ventral vagal” isn’t the goal. Therapists need to check whose comfort is being protected when "regulation" becomes urgent. There's no moral hierarchy to nervous system states, though that's not how PVT is often applied in therapy. As polyvagal theory becomes trendier, it also becomes flatter. We’re here to bring back the nuance, question our field’s over-simplifications, and remind therapists that being human is not a tidy three-state diagram. This one might make you rethink how you talk about safety, activation, and the nervous system with clients, and maybe how you talk to yourself, too.

When Resourcing Doesn't Work

In this episode, we dive into the complexities of EMDR therapy and the often-frustrating moments when resources don’t land as expected. As trauma therapists and consultants, we explore what happens when the “standard” tools fall short—and how curiosity, creativity, and flexibility can turn these challenges into opportunities for growth. We discuss: * Why resourcing sometimes doesn’t work as planned * The expectation vs. reality gap in Phase Two of EMDR * How resourcing can act as a litmus test for the nervous system * The value of curiosity in reframing “failed” sessions * Redefining success and failure as hypothesis-building rather than certainty Therapy, like life, rarely follows a script. By leaning into the unexpected, we can deepen our understanding of both clients and ourselves, making room for resilience, wisdom, and innovation in the work. About Us Learn more about our trainings, retreats, and resources at iristrainingcollective.com. Subscribe for more conversations on the art and challenge of therapy—and if this episode resonates with you, leave us a review to help keep the dialogue going.