10 Lessons from 10 Years of Parenthood

Taking Pause. Permission To Go Inwards.

“Let this be your permission to go inwards and listen to the answers that are already within you.” —  Allison Villa Hello dear friends - some bittersweet news to share… This will be the final episode of the Couplehood podcast. (I may return once again or re-direct my energy into other projects...we shall see!) After much reflection, I’ve decided to take a pause on many aspects of my work life. In this episode, I share why I’ve come to this decision, the passage that inspired me to go inwards, as well as some reflection questions to help you reflect on your own journey. Over the past 20 months, my work as a psychotherapist has given me great purpose. Supporting my clients through mental health challenges has been a great privilege. On a personal level, this past year and a half has brought a lot of personal change. Our family moved from Toronto, where we lived for 20 years, and are now living 2 hours north, in the countryside. The home that we’ve been building for the past year, will be ready for us to move into in January. I want to be intentional with finding our flow as a family in this new space. In‌ ‌this‌ ‌episode of Couplehood,‌ ‌you’ll discover:‌ * Why Allison is taking a pause on recording new episodes * The passage that inspired this change * The balance between “doing” and “being” * Reflection questions for you Thank you for being on this Couplehood journey with me! Stay in touch by joining my email list - this is the best way to stay in touch, as I won’t be on social media very much moving forward. This is not a goodbye - it’s “see you soon”! Big Love, Allison “Children have the most beautiful way of both being and doing. They are able to run with the wind. Let them be your greatest teachers and guides along this journey.” —  Allison Villa Links:‌ ‌ Quiz: What's Your Relationship Season? [join my email list here] https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/5f984bffa2c7af0014e9a0b7 [https://theultimatecreative.com/wp-json/wp-mail-smtp/v1/e/ZGF0YSU1QmVtYWlsX2xvZ19pZCU1RD00ODkmZGF0YSU1QmV2ZW50X3R5cGUlNUQ9Y2xpY2stbGluayZkYXRhJTVCb2JqZWN0X2lkJTVEPTE3MzEmZGF0YSU1QnVybCU1RD1odHRwcyUyNTNBJTI1MkYlMjUyRnF1aXoudHJ5aW50ZXJhY3QuY29tJTI1MkYlMjUyMyUyNTJGNWY5ODRiZmZhMmM3YWYwMDE0ZTlhMGI3Jmhhc2g9ZGZkZTExZjJkYmVhY2RiMjMyZjE2MDYxYWYxYTdlNzZlNmRjNjc5YjdkMjk2MmM3YjExZTQxY2M0MDEwZmY5Yg==] Work With Me: https://www.allisonvilla.com [https://theultimatecreative.com/wp-json/wp-mail-smtp/v1/e/ZGF0YSU1QmVtYWlsX2xvZ19pZCU1RD00ODkmZGF0YSU1QmV2ZW50X3R5cGUlNUQ9Y2xpY2stbGluayZkYXRhJTVCb2JqZWN0X2lkJTVEPTE3MzImZGF0YSU1QnVybCU1RD1odHRwcyUyNTNBJTI1MkYlMjUyRnd3dy5hbGxpc29udmlsbGEuY29tJmhhc2g9OGRkYzRmZmMyM2QzZGIyNDQwYjQ2ZWI1MjJkZWIxMzJiZmNjNGI3OTIxYjViYjRjMDQxNzZhM2ViODc2MDdlYg==] Follow Me on Instagram: https://instagram.com/allison__villa [https://theultimatecreative.com/wp-json/wp-mail-smtp/v1/e/ZGF0YSU1QmVtYWlsX2xvZ19pZCU1RD00ODkmZGF0YSU1QmV2ZW50X3R5cGUlNUQ9Y2xpY2stbGluayZkYXRhJTVCb2JqZWN0X2lkJTVEPTE3MzMmZGF0YSU1QnVybCU1RD1odHRwcyUyNTNBJTI1MkYlMjUyRmluc3RhZ3JhbS5jb20lMjUyRmFsbGlzb25fX3ZpbGxhJmhhc2g9ZTVkODRlYjZhYWRjMGE5YWQ0MmRhOTg2ODZiMDJiYTY1N2I4ODZjYzdjZGZiZTYxZGM0ZjUxYWQxYjJiZTljNQ==] Please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!

Simple Ways To Show Love Every Day

“The day to day moments are just as meaningful as the date nights you have.” —  Allison Villa How do we show love every day, when family life is so full-on? I get this question a lot. This is why I created the Love.Every.Day. series every Tuesday on Instagram...and now, also on the podcast! Love.Every.Day tips are simple yet powerful ways to show your love to each other. If you’ve been around for a while, you’ll know how much I advocate showing your kids what a loving relationship looks like, because how you love each other today lives on for generations. Let’s continue to build an army of parents who are creating honest + sustainable relationships. These tips are a gentle reminder that on those busy family days, it’s still possible to show your kids what love looks like in action. In‌ ‌this‌ ‌episode of Couplehood,‌ ‌you’ll discover:‌ * How Love.Every.Day. impacts your kids * Why showing your love everyday is so important * Some tips to help you get started showing and receiving Love.Every.Day. “Children want to feel purposeful and they like having a sense of responsibility, like they are part of the team. So let them. —  Allison Villa ‌ Highlights:‌ ‌ 00:38  Setting an example of love 01:40  Get some sleep 03:00  Be playful 04:03  Create a centerpiece 05:30 Play games 06:28  Meal plan together! 09:40  Recap ‌ Links:‌ ‌ Quiz: What's Your Relationship Season? https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/5f984bffa2c7af0014e9a0b7 [https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/5f984bffa2c7af0014e9a0b7] Work With Me: https://www.allisonvilla.com [https://www.allisonvilla.com] Follow Me on Instagram: https://instagram.com/allison__villa [https://instagram.com/allison__villa] Please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!

10 Lessons from 10 Years of Parenthood

“The best measure of your parenting is your child’s happiness.” —  Allison Villa Have you ever stopped to think about what lessons you have learned in parenthood? Recently, I’ve celebrated a huge milestone in my life; 10 years of motherhood. In today’s episode of Couplehood, I took some time to reflect on what I’ve learned in my 10 years of parenting and what I would tell myself 10 years ago when I began my motherhood journey. As you listen, I encourage you to reflect on your own parenting journey and write down the lessons that you’ve learned along the way. I find it helpful to find compassion for my younger self, as a new mother, and I hope that you share that grace with yourself as well. In‌ ‌this‌ ‌episode of Couplehood,‌ ‌you’ll discover:‌ * What the true measure of your parenting is * How your childhood plays a role in your children’s childhood * What to do when you make a mistake as a parent * How important your relationships with your partner and your friends are in your parenthood journey “Our children are our mirrors and they reflect our own inner-child wounds that may still need healing. Let your children be your guide to keep going inwards and understanding yourself.” —  Allison Villa ‌ Highlights:‌ ‌ 01:36  You can’t get an A in parenting 02:57  Repair ruptures 03:50  Make time for yourself 04:38  Grief and growth 05:10  Make your own choices 05:55  Your children’s childhood is their’s 07:46  Prioritize your couple 08:40  Friendships will change 09:30  Vacation 10:54  Change direction ‌ Links:‌ ‌ Quiz: What's Your Relationship Season? [https://quiz.tryinteract.com/#/5f984bffa2c7af0014e9a0b7] Work With Me [https://www.allisonvilla.com] Follow Me on Instagram [https://instagram.com/allison__villa] Please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!

Baby Shower vs. Blessing Way

“A Blessing Way is traditionally when multi-generations come together to celebrate & support the mother-to-be before baby’s arrival.” —  Allison Villa Today’s episode of the Couplehood podcast is for those of you that are expecting, or have someone in your life that’s expecting. We’re going to cover the difference between a Baby Shower and a Blessing Way. If you’ve never heard of a Blessing Way - don’t worry - I’m going to fill you in! I recently hosted a Blessing Way that had a unique twist from the traditional ceremony. This one celebrated both the mother and father-to-be - such a beautiful way to honour and support their couple as they transition into parenthood.  A great reminder that you can design a Baby Shower or Blessing Way, in whatever way is right for you, your family, and your community. In this episode, I provide you with some ideas that you can use in planning your own Blessing Way, and simple touches to personalize it to your needs. In‌ ‌this‌ ‌episode of Couplehood,‌ ‌you’ll discover:‌ ‌ * What is a Blessing Way * Ideas &  details about the ceremony * How you can host your own “In the circle, you are  accessing your heritage and the generations that live within you.” —  Allison Villa ‌ Highlights:‌ ‌ 00:23  The Couplehood Podcast 01:10  What is a baby shower? 02:27  What is a blessing way? 05:17  Ideas for your blessing way 07:10  Guests 09:30 Affirming words 10:00  Lighting candles 12:47  Recap ‌ Links:‌ ‌ ‌ Work With Me [https://www.allisonvilla.com]: Follow Me on Instagram [https://instagram.com/allison__villa] Please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!

From Cautious To Courageous

“I want our kids to see the support we give each other. You can have differences, but still be loving and supportive of each other.” —  Sarah Today’s episode is part of my limited Sandbox Spotlight series, which features interviews with real-life couples talking about their real-life experiences navigating the 4 Relationship Seasons, developing better communication skills, and deepening their connection. If you haven’t listened to my episodes on the Relationship Seasons [https://www.allisonvilla.com/posts-for-blog/4-relationship-seasons], I recommend you check them out first! My guests for this episode are Sarah and Steve. They have been together for 14 years and have 4 children, ages 9, 7, 4, and 2. Sarah and Steve are currently in the Coping Season (or Connected Season, depending on who took the quiz!). Over the past year they have had multiple external factors pulling their time and energy,  including home renovations, a  life-changing bicycle accident, and Steve’s new work as a freelancer, just to name a few. With so many life events happening all at once, it’s naturally been difficult to carve out the time needed to focus on themselves as a couple. Having awareness around the Relationship Seasons and using the tools they learned through Couple’s Sandbox has helped them remember that seasons ebb and flow and the Coping Season doesn’t last forever. In our conversation, Sarah and Steve share how they moved past their initial hesitations around joining Sandbox (group calls can seem scary!), and how they now look forward to connecting with the other couples in the community. It has been a source of relatable connection and normalizes the challenges that every couple goes through, plus it prompts meaningful conversation with each other! In‌ ‌this‌ ‌episode of Couplehood,‌ ‌you’ll discover:‌ ‌ * How Sarah and Steve say that awareness around the Relationship Seasons has helped them * Why being the Couple Sandbox community is so important * How modelling and normalizing struggles that all couples benefit your whole family “You have to be at ease with yourself before you can be at ease with each other.” —  Steve ‌ Highlights:‌ ‌ 00:24  The Sandbox Spotlight 01:50  Sarah and Steve 33:00  Gratitude ‌ Links:‌ ‌ ‌ Work With Me: https://www.allisonvilla.com [https://www.allisonvilla.com] Follow Me on Instagram: https://instagram.com/allison__villa [https://instagram.com/allison__villa] Please remember to subscribe, rate, and review!