Ep 79: Why Mothers are so Burned Out

Ep 79: Why Mothers are so Burned Out

Women are expected to absorb the failures of society while rarely benefiting from the systems they hold together and we've been conditioned to call that love. We call it motherhood, sacrifice, and "doing what needs to be done." But what we rarely call it is labor. In this episode of Interrupting Business As Usual, Nikki unpacks the hidden economic reality beneath modern motherhood, caregiving, emotional labor, and burnout under capitalism. From maternal hypervigilance and invisible labor to nervous system exhaustion and societal overburdening, this conversation explores why so many mothers are overwhelmed and what we can do about it. This episode explores: * Maternal burnout and nervous system exhaustion * Emotional labor and invisible labor * Motherhood under capitalism * Why care work is real labor * The mental load mothers carry * Privatized care and collective care * Hypervigilance and overfunctioning in women * Feminized labor and economic extraction * Why mothers are blamed for systemic failures * Attachment theory, caregiving, and emotional regulation * The relationship between capitalism and motherhood * Why women are expected to "hold everything together" * The socialization of girls into caregiving * Burnout culture, parenting pressure, and maternal responsibility This episode also reflects on: * Tressie McMillan Cottom's insights about vaccine hesitancy and maternal pressure * Growing up as the child of a disabled single Black mother * Caretaking identities formed through survival * Why women are taught to normalize self-abandonment * The cultural lie that support makes people weak * Why capitalism depends on women overfunctioning If you've ever felt: * emotionally exhausted * hyper-responsible * trapped in survival mode * overwhelmed by caregiving * burdened by everyone else's needs * unable to rest without guilt …this episode is going to hit home. Special thanks to Def Sound for providing the theme for Interrupting Business As Usual.⁣⁣⁣⁣ ⁣ Where do we go from here? * To learn more about what you heard on the podcast today, visit nikkiblak.com [https://nikkiblak.com/]. * TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/email-sign-up-IBAU] to subscribe to the free weekly email series Resourcing a Revolution for more exclusive content * Follow me on IG: @nikkiblak [https://www.instagram.com/nikkiblak] Work With Nikki If this episode has you feeling activated around burnout, motherhood, labor, work, worthiness, care, ambition, money, or liberation, applications for Nikki's private 1:1 coaching are now open. Nikki's work integrates: * intersectional feminism * liberatory life coaching * nervous system awareness * career and business mentorship * anti-capitalist and anti-oppressive frameworks TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/work-with-nikki-IBAU] to apply. Next Episode: Black Women and the Economics of Liberation A Juneteenth-adjacent conversation about labor, ownership, survival, economic extraction, and what freedom actually means in a society built on Black labor.

Ep 78: We Can't Have Matriarchy without Community

Everybody keeps saying they want matriarchy, but few folks want to do the work to actually be in community. In this episode of Interrupting Business As Usual, Nikki unpacks why rugged individualism is fundamentally incompatible with liberation, collective care, and matriarchy. From settler colonialism and capitalism to the myth of "single motherhood," this conversation explores how hyper-independence has fractured our relationships, isolated mothers, and normalized burnout as a way of life. This episode dives deep into: * Rugged individualism and capitalism * Why community is essential for liberation * Matriarchy and collective care * The social construction of "single motherhood" * Black collectivist traditions and survival strategies * Attachment parenting and emotional security * Why support does NOT make people weak * Community, interdependence, and mutual aid * Burnout, isolation, and nervous system awareness * Why capitalism benefits from disconnected people If you've ever felt exhausted trying to survive everything alone… If you've struggled to trust community… If you've been taught that needing support is weakness… This episode is for you. Mentioned in this episode: * Finding Your People: From Sociopolitical Isolation to Collective Action. TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/finding-your-people-IBAU] to start finding your people. * Episode 27: What We Get Wrong About Community. TAP HERE [https://pod.link/1789883755/episode/NmM5OTkzZGUtZDJlNy00NWRjLWI1ZTktODc2YWMxYmQyYmEx] to listen. * Episode 69: Why White Women Are So Politically Isolated. TAP HERE [https://pod.link/1789883755/episode/YTZiMTBiNGMtMWJjZS00OTA2LWIxNWEtMzQ5Y2UwZTA2YTc4] to listen. Special thanks to Def Sound for providing the theme for Interrupting Business As Usual.⁣⁣⁣⁣ ⁣ Where do we go from here? * To learn more about what you heard on the podcast today, visit nikkiblak.com [https://nikkiblak.com/]. * TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/work-with-nikki-IBAU] to work privately with Nikki * TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/email-sign-up-IBAU] to subscribe to the free weekly email series Resourcing a Revolution for more exclusive content * Follow Nikki on IG: @nikkiblak [https://www.instagram.com/nikkiblak]

Ep 77: How Do We Achieve Matriarchy? Healing Beyond Whiteness and Toward Collective Liberation with Myisha T. Hill

Matriarchy is not simply women occupying positions of power inside the same violent systems. It is a complete reimagining of how we relate to ourselves, one another, the Earth, healing, care, accountability, and collective survival. In the final installment of this series on matriarchy, Nikki sits down with educator, author, and healing justice practitioner Myisha T. Hill for a profound conversation about what it would actually take to co-create a matriarchal society. Together, they explore why liberation cannot be achieved through intellectual understanding alone and why healing - especially healing beyond whiteness, hierarchy, patriarchy, and codependency - is essential to collective liberation. This conversation dives deep into: * Whiteness as erasure * Somatics and nervous system healing * The difference between codependency and interdependence * Ancestor work and healing historical wounds * Why white feminism cannot create matriarchy * Black feminist and Indigenous understandings of care * Healing justice as liberatory practice * Embodiment, praxis, and living the work IRL * Collective liberation and the future we must learn to co-create together Myisha also shares insights from her groundbreaking book Heal Your Way Forward and discusses why so many people attempt liberation work without first doing the internal healing required to sustain it. If Episodes 75 and 76 asked us to rethink power and democracy, this conversation asks us something even deeper: Who must we become to make matriarchy possible? TAP HERE [https://myishathill.com/] to connect with Myisha T. Hill, learn more about her Joy Is the Revolution Tour, and get a copy of her book Heal Your Way Forward: The Co-Conspirator's Guide to an Antiracist Future. Special thanks to Def Sound for providing the theme for Interrupting Business As Usual.⁣⁣⁣⁣ ⁣ Where do we go from here? * To learn more about what you heard on the podcast today, visit nikkiblak.com [https://bit.ly/website-IBAU]. * TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/work-with-nikki-IBAU] to work privately with Nikki * TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/email-sign-up-IBAU] to subscribe to the free weekly email series Resourcing a Revolution for more exclusive content * Follow Nikki on IG: @nikkiblak [https://www.instagram.com/nikkiblak]

Ep 76: How to Save Democracy with Matriarchy: Healing Historical Wounds and Practicing Care Without Control with Crystal Tennille Irby

What would it actually take to save democracy? And what if the answer isn't more control, more domination, or simply replacing men with women in positions of power? In this episode of Interrupting Business as Usual, Nikki sits down with writer, podcaster, birth worker, and creative visionary Crystal Tennille Irby for a conversation about matriarchy, collective care, Black motherhood, and what it means to build a society rooted in care instead of control. As gender-based violence, authoritarianism, and political instability continue escalating across the United States, more people are calling for matriarchy as an alternative to patriarchy. But what do people actually mean when they say "matriarchy"? And are we truly prepared for the kind of transformation a matriarchal society would require? Together, Crystal and Nikki explore: * Why matriarchy is not simply "women in power" * How patriarchy distorts our understanding of power * Collective care, motherhood, and community responsibility * What the historical wounds of chattel slavery have to do with our inability to build a matriarchal society * The importance of liberatory imagination, creativity, and dreaming * Why democracy cannot survive without a radically different relationship to care, power, and community This conversation also examines the role of Black women in political resistance movements, the South as both a historical wound and a site of liberation, and the ways liberal feminism often reproduces patriarchal ideas about power and domination. More than a conversation about matriarchy, this episode is an invitation to imagine new ways of relating to one another - ways rooted in accountability, creativity, collective responsibility, and care without control. If you've been asking: * What is matriarchy? * Can matriarchy replace patriarchy? * How do we build safer communities? * Why does modern feminism still feel rooted in domination? * What would a society centered around care actually look like? This episode is for you. TAP HERE [https://www.instagram.com/crystaltennilleirby?igsh=NTc4MTIwNjQ2YQ==] to connect with Crystal Tennille Irby. Listen to Dem Black Mamas Podcast at: https://demblackmamas.com/podcast [https://demblackmamas.com/podcast] Special thanks to Def Sound for providing the theme for Interrupting Business As Usual.⁣⁣⁣⁣ ⁣ Where do we go from here? * To learn more about what you heard on the podcast today, visit nikkiblak.com [https://bit.ly/website-IBAU]. * TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/work-with-nikki-IBAU] to work privately with Nikki * TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/email-sign-up-IBAU] to subscribe to the free weekly email series Resourcing a Revolution for more exclusive content Follow Nikki on IG: @nikkiblak [https://www.instagram.com/nikkiblak]

Ep 75: Matriarchy Won't Work Until We Rethink Power: Care, Repair, and What Liberal Feminism Gets Wrong with Rev. Brig Feltus

Matriarchy won't save us. Not if we're still operating from the same broken understanding of power that created the world we're trying to escape. In this episode of Interrupting Business as Usual, Nikki is in conversation with Reverend Brig Feltus - anti-racism educator, metaphysical minister, and someone who embodies what it means to move through the world with deep relational awareness. Together, they interrogate the rising call for matriarchy in response to patriarchy, gender-based violence, and femicide - especially as liberal feminism positions matriarchy as the "solution." And they ask a harder question: What if we're not actually ready for matriarchy? Because if your understanding of power is still rooted in domination, control, and hierarchy… Then you're not building something new. You're replicating the same system with different people at the top. In this episode, we explore: * What matriarchy actually means (and what it doesn't) * Why liberal feminism misunderstands power - and the consequences of that * How Black women have always practiced forms of matrilineal care and collective responsibility * Allo-parenting, community care, and relational ways of being * Why integrity is a prerequisite for leadership, trust, and collective safety * The role of repair and accountability in building any liberatory future * How our socialization under patriarchy limits our ability to imagine something different * Why many women either fear power or replicate domination when they access it * What it actually requires to move toward a matriarchal or matrilineal society This isn't a conversation about replacing patriarchy with matriarchy. It's a conversation about transforming our relationship to power. Because without care, integrity, and repair… Matriarchy won't work. If you've been asking: * "What is matriarchy?" * "Is matriarchy better than patriarchy?" * "Can feminism actually create liberation?" This episode will challenge what you think you know and invite you into something deeper. Connect with Reverend Brig Feltus by visiting https://www.rememberinstitute.com/ [https://www.rememberinstitute.com/] Special thanks to Def Sound for providing the theme for Interrupting Business As Usual.⁣⁣⁣⁣ ⁣ Where do we go from here? * To learn more about what you heard on the podcast today, visit nikkiblak.com [https://bit.ly/website-IBAU]. * TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/work-with-nikki-IBAU] to work privately with Nikki * TAP HERE [https://bit.ly/email-sign-up-IBAU] to subscribe to the free weekly email series Resourcing a Revolution for more exclusive content Follow me on IG: @nikkiblak [https://www.instagram.com/nikkiblak]