Rooted & Rehumanizing

039: Control, Identity, and Becoming “Her”

41 min · 4. mai 2026
episode 039: Control, Identity, and Becoming “Her” cover

Beskrivelse

What if the resistance you feel isn’t about the work… but about who you’re allowing yourself to be while doing it? In this episode, Meg coaches Jillian live in a raw and unfiltered conversation that uncovers the deeper layers behind control, anxiety, and identity. What begins as a discussion about trying to control outcomes quickly reveals something more foundational. A split between two versions of self. Jillian shares the tension between who she is in the world and who she feels she is at home. The bold, visionary leader versus the smaller, more contracted version seeking safety. Together, they unpack where these patterns come from, why they persist, and what it looks like to begin integrating them instead of choosing between them. This conversation moves beyond mindset and into embodiment. It explores what it really means to trust yourself, to feel safe being fully seen, and to step into a more complete version of who you already are. WHAT WE EXPLORE IN THIS EPISODE: * The hidden cost of trying to control outcomes instead of trusting the process * Why resistance often shows up around the very practices that help us most * The belief that success must come through grit, struggle, and sacrifice * The internal split between “who I am at work” and “who I am at home” * How safety, peace, and success can coexist instead of compete * The fear of being fully seen and how it shapes behavior and identity * Why contraction and expansion are both necessary parts of growth * The difference between forcing change and allowing integration * Reframing “hurting people” as inviting them into a higher version of themselves * What it means to truly embody “I am her” KEY TAKEAWAYS * You don’t have to choose between success and peace. They can exist together. * The parts of you you’ve separated are meant to be integrated, not managed. * Resistance is often a signal pointing directly to the belief that needs to be examined. * You are already resourced. The evidence is in the people who fully know and love you. * Growth doesn’t require force. It can happen through awareness, observation, and gentleness. * You are not becoming someone new. You are allowing more of who you already are. We Would Love to Connect With You Your reflections, questions, and lived experiences mean so much to us. If this episode resonates, please share it, leave a review, or reach out. Connect with Jillian Website: https://trellissuite.com/ [https://trellissuite.com/] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/] Email: jillianp@trellissuite.com [jillianp@trellissuite.com] See what Jillian is building!! www.linkedin.com/company/trellissuite Connect with Meg Website: www.profoundwellness.net [http://www.profoundwellness.net] Email: meg@profoundwellness.net [meg@profoundwellness.net] Facebook: facebook.com/megan.fikse [http://facebook.com/megan.fikse] Instagram: instagram.com/m.laidlaw [http://instagram.com/m.laidlaw] Meg’s Offerings * Heart Math BioFeedback Device: * https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg [https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg] * Self Mastery Program: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program [https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program] * Bold Beautiful Life Membership: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership [https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership] * Bold Beautiful Business Mastermind: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/mastermind [https://www.profoundwellness.net/mastermind] Mentioned in this episode: Outro Dyn AD

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43 Episoder

episode 043: Radical Self-Responsibility cover

043: Radical Self-Responsibility

What changes when you stop waiting for your future life to save you? In this honest and layered conversation, Meg and Jill explore the idea of radical self-responsibility. Not as self-blame or perfectionism, but as taking ownership of the life, patterns, choices, and energy that shape your everyday experience. Jillian shares a surprisingly emotional realization that started with something simple: deep cleaning her house. After years of telling herself that someday, when she was more successful, someone else would handle it, she realized how disconnected she had become from her own agency and ability to change her current reality now. From there, the conversation expands into nervous system patterns, self-talk, burnout, autonomy, over-responsibility, and the subtle ways people give away ownership of their own lives. Meg brings in a powerful reframe around bullying ourselves into change versus creating safety around growth. Together, they unpack how awareness, permission, boundaries, and personal agency all play a role in creating a life that actually feels aligned. This episode is both practical and deeply reflective. A conversation about reclaiming authorship over your life one small decision at a time. WHAT WE EXPLORE IN THIS EPISODE: * What radical self-responsibility actually means * The difference between self-responsibility and self-blame * How overwhelm and avoidance can disconnect us from action * Bullying yourself versus creating nervous system safety * Negative self-talk and the impact it has emotionally * Parenting conversations around self-worth and inner dialogue * The subtle ways people outsource their own power * Over-responsibility and carrying things that are not yours * Boundaries, autonomy, and letting others fulfill their own role * Rewriting relationship patterns through trust and space * Designing your life intentionally instead of waiting for “someday” * Recognizing the autonomy and agency you already have * Counter-cultural choices around rest, breaks, and personal wellbeing * How small compromises slowly disconnect us from ourselves * Learning to take ownership of your time, energy, and values We Would Love to Connect With You Your reflections, questions, and lived experiences mean so much to us. If this episode resonates, please share it, leave a review, or reach out. Connect with Jillian Website: https://trellissuite.com/ [https://trellissuite.com/] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/] Email: jillianp@trellissuite.com [jillianp@trellissuite.com] See what Jillian is building!! www.linkedin.com/company/trellissuite Connect with Meg Website: www.profoundwellness.net [http://www.profoundwellness.net] Email: meg@profoundwellness.net [meg@profoundwellness.net] Facebook: facebook.com/megan.fikse [http://facebook.com/megan.fikse] Instagram: instagram.com/m.laidlaw [http://instagram.com/m.laidlaw] Meg’s Offerings * Heart Math BioFeedback Device: * https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg [https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg] * Self Mastery Program: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program [https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program] * Bold Beautiful Life Membership: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership [https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership] Mentioned in this episode: Outro Dyn AD

1. juni 202624 min
episode 042: Stepping Outside of the Box You Were Given with Amanda Haveman cover

042: Stepping Outside of the Box You Were Given with Amanda Haveman

Meg opens this conversation by introducing Amanda Haveman, a business owner, mother of seven, and someone who embodies what it looks like to live fully outside of traditional roles. From the beginning, Amanda shares how her life is a blend of motherhood, business ownership, and personal growth. What stands out immediately is her perspective that work life and home life are not separate. They are deeply connected. Meg and Jillian explore Amanda’s experience working in a male-dominated industry and what it has required of her to find her voice, define her role, and step fully into her strengths. Amanda reflects on how learning to stay in her zone of genius, while trusting others to do the same, has transformed both her confidence and the way her team operates. The conversation expands into the realities of delegation, not just in business but at home. Amanda shares honestly about the internal struggle of letting go of control, especially as a mother, and how that shift has been necessary for her to show up fully in both spaces. As the episode deepens, Amanda opens up about her childhood and how growing up in a chaotic and unhealed environment shaped her drive to create something different for her own children. The discussion moves into generational healing, forgiveness, and the boundaries required to protect the life she is building. A powerful shift emerges around self-trust. Amanda shares how learning to trust her previous self and her future self has reduced anxiety and allowed her to move through life with more ease and confidence. Meg and Jillian reflect on how many people unknowingly place themselves into boxes based on expectations, and how stepping outside of those boxes requires both awareness and courage. The episode closes with Amanda sharing her passion for showing women that they are capable of building a life that includes both a thriving family and meaningful work. Her message is clear. There is no single path. You are allowed to create your own. WHAT THIS EPISODE EXPLORES • What it’s like to work in a male-dominated industry • Staying in your zone of genius and trusting others to do the same • The connection between work life and home life • Delegation at home and why it impacts your ability to show up at work • The tension between motherhood and ambition • Breaking generational patterns and creating a new path • Forgiveness, boundaries, and protecting your peace • The concept of trusting your previous self and your future self • How identity shifts from proving to self-trust • The idea of being “in a box” and how to step outside of it • Reframing chaos as a need for stimulation and growth • The stigma and misunderstanding around large families • Why people are more capable than they’ve been led to believe KEY TAKEAWAYS • You are capable of building a life that includes both family and meaningful work. • Trusting your previous self and your future self reduces anxiety in the present. • Delegation is necessary for sustainability, not a reflection of failure. • Generational patterns can be broken through awareness and intentional action. • Boundaries can exist alongside compassion. • The environments and people around you shape how you see yourself. • What feels overwhelming to others may be the level of stimulation you thrive in. • You do not have to stay in roles or identities that no longer fit. Mentioned in this episode: Outro Dyn AD

25. mai 202648 min
episode 041: What Do You Do When You Want to Quit? cover

041: What Do You Do When You Want to Quit?

What happens when the urge to quit isn’t actually about quitting? In this deeply honest and vulnerable conversation, Meg and Jillian explore the emotional tension between overwhelm, self-protection, burnout, and alignment. From marriage and motherhood to parenting, work, and emotional safety, they unpack what it feels like when your nervous system wants out before your heart actually does. Meg shares how her instinct is often to pull away, sever ties, or “bulldoze” through discomfort in order to protect herself, while Jillian reflects on her tendency to push through and overstay in situations before learning to slow down and trust herself. Together, they explore the importance of creating space before making major decisions. Not reacting from urgency, emotion, or perfectionism, but allowing feelings to rise, fall, and settle before determining what is actually true. The conversation moves through emotional regulation, parenting through big feelings, self-trust, codependency, overcommitment, and the pressure many people feel to “do things the right way.” Rather than offering perfect answers, this episode becomes a reminder that being human is nuanced, messy, emotional, and deeply personal. WHAT WE EXPLORE IN THIS EPISODE: * The emotional urge to quit relationships, jobs, parenting responsibilities, or commitments * The difference between reacting from overwhelm versus grounded alignment * Fight, flight, bulldozing, and self-protection responses * Why slowing down can help create clarity in difficult decisions * The importance of “simmering” before making major choices * How perfectionism contributes to burnout and emotional collapse * The connection between self-trust and emotional safety * Parenting through big feelings while still holding boundaries * How people pleasing can disconnect us from our actual needs * Learning to express truth without explosiveness * The pressure of overcommitment and “badge of burnout” culture * Using nature, movement, journaling, and reflection to process emotions * The reminder that there is not always one universally “right” answer We Would Love to Connect With You Your reflections, questions, and lived experiences mean so much to us. If this episode resonates, please share it, leave a review, or reach out. Connect with Jillian Website: https://trellissuite.com/ [https://trellissuite.com/] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/] Email: jillianp@trellissuite.com [jillianp@trellissuite.com] See what Jillian is building!! www.linkedin.com/company/trellissuite Connect with Meg Website: www.profoundwellness.net [http://www.profoundwellness.net] Email: meg@profoundwellness.net [meg@profoundwellness.net] Facebook: facebook.com/megan.fikse [http://facebook.com/megan.fikse] Instagram: instagram.com/m.laidlaw [http://instagram.com/m.laidlaw] Meg’s Offerings * Heart Math BioFeedback Device: * https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg [https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg] * Self Mastery Program: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program [https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program] * Bold Beautiful Life Membership: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership [https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership] * HEART! Focused-Business: https://l.bttr.to/YqpAf [https://l.bttr.to/YqpAf] Mentioned in this episode: Outro Dyn AD

18. mai 202625 min
episode 040: From Knowing to Embodying cover

040: From Knowing to Embodying

What happens after the breakthrough? In part two of this live coaching series, Jillian explores the space that comes after awareness. The part that is often overlooked. Moving from understanding something intellectually to actually living it. After uncovering the belief patterns holding her back in the previous episode, Jillian notices her tendency to stop at the “aha.” To understand the shift, but not embody it. Meg guides her into the body. Into sensation, presence, and awareness. Using a simple but powerful practice, they explore how tension lives in the body, how safety can be accessed, and how capacity is built not by fixing, but by feeling. This conversation reframes what it means to “do the work.” Not as something rigid or structured, but as something fluid, intuitive, and available in every moment. It’s a shift from performance to presence. From checking the box to actually being in it. WHAT WE EXPLORE IN THIS EPISODE: * The gap between intellectual understanding and embodiment * Why awareness alone doesn’t create change * How tension and stress show up physically in the body * A simple somatic practice to build capacity for discomfort * The concept of pendulation and nervous system regulation * Where different parts of identity live in the body * Why slowing down feels like a “waste of time” and how to reframe it * Breaking the habit of turning healing into a checklist * Using everyday moments as opportunities for presence * The importance of variety and flexibility in personal practices * Self-mothering and learning to ask: what do I need right now? We Would Love to Connect With You Your reflections, questions, and lived experiences mean so much to us. If this episode resonates, please share it, leave a review, or reach out. Connect with Jillian Website: https://trellissuite.com/ [https://trellissuite.com/] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/] Email: jillianp@trellissuite.com [jillianp@trellissuite.com] See what Jillian is building!! www.linkedin.com/company/trellissuite Connect with Meg Website: www.profoundwellness.net [http://www.profoundwellness.net] Email: meg@profoundwellness.net [meg@profoundwellness.net] Facebook: facebook.com/megan.fikse [http://facebook.com/megan.fikse] Instagram: instagram.com/m.laidlaw [http://instagram.com/m.laidlaw] Meg’s Offerings * Heart Math BioFeedback Device: * https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg [https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg] * Self Mastery Program: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program [https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program] * Bold Beautiful Life Membership: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership [https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership] * HEART! Focused-Business: https://l.bttr.to/YqpAf [https://l.bttr.to/YqpAf] Mentioned in this episode: Outro Dyn AD

11. mai 202622 min
episode 039: Control, Identity, and Becoming “Her” cover

039: Control, Identity, and Becoming “Her”

What if the resistance you feel isn’t about the work… but about who you’re allowing yourself to be while doing it? In this episode, Meg coaches Jillian live in a raw and unfiltered conversation that uncovers the deeper layers behind control, anxiety, and identity. What begins as a discussion about trying to control outcomes quickly reveals something more foundational. A split between two versions of self. Jillian shares the tension between who she is in the world and who she feels she is at home. The bold, visionary leader versus the smaller, more contracted version seeking safety. Together, they unpack where these patterns come from, why they persist, and what it looks like to begin integrating them instead of choosing between them. This conversation moves beyond mindset and into embodiment. It explores what it really means to trust yourself, to feel safe being fully seen, and to step into a more complete version of who you already are. WHAT WE EXPLORE IN THIS EPISODE: * The hidden cost of trying to control outcomes instead of trusting the process * Why resistance often shows up around the very practices that help us most * The belief that success must come through grit, struggle, and sacrifice * The internal split between “who I am at work” and “who I am at home” * How safety, peace, and success can coexist instead of compete * The fear of being fully seen and how it shapes behavior and identity * Why contraction and expansion are both necessary parts of growth * The difference between forcing change and allowing integration * Reframing “hurting people” as inviting them into a higher version of themselves * What it means to truly embody “I am her” KEY TAKEAWAYS * You don’t have to choose between success and peace. They can exist together. * The parts of you you’ve separated are meant to be integrated, not managed. * Resistance is often a signal pointing directly to the belief that needs to be examined. * You are already resourced. The evidence is in the people who fully know and love you. * Growth doesn’t require force. It can happen through awareness, observation, and gentleness. * You are not becoming someone new. You are allowing more of who you already are. We Would Love to Connect With You Your reflections, questions, and lived experiences mean so much to us. If this episode resonates, please share it, leave a review, or reach out. Connect with Jillian Website: https://trellissuite.com/ [https://trellissuite.com/] LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jillian-pezet-trellis/] Email: jillianp@trellissuite.com [jillianp@trellissuite.com] See what Jillian is building!! www.linkedin.com/company/trellissuite Connect with Meg Website: www.profoundwellness.net [http://www.profoundwellness.net] Email: meg@profoundwellness.net [meg@profoundwellness.net] Facebook: facebook.com/megan.fikse [http://facebook.com/megan.fikse] Instagram: instagram.com/m.laidlaw [http://instagram.com/m.laidlaw] Meg’s Offerings * Heart Math BioFeedback Device: * https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg [https://www.heartmath.com/coachmeg] * Self Mastery Program: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program [https://www.profoundwellness.net/self-mastery-program] * Bold Beautiful Life Membership: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership [https://www.profoundwellness.net/membership] * Bold Beautiful Business Mastermind: * https://www.profoundwellness.net/mastermind [https://www.profoundwellness.net/mastermind] Mentioned in this episode: Outro Dyn AD

4. mai 202641 min