When Your Past Hijacks Your Future

When Your Past Hijacks Your Future

"Trauma is a motherfucker." It may be one of the most honest lines Kristi has ever spoken on the podcast. In this deeply personal episode of Midlife Moments, Kristi explores how past heartbreak, betrayal, and painful life experiences can quietly shape the way we approach new relationships, opportunities, and even ourselves. Through her own story of dating after divorce, she shares how trauma created emotional walls, fueled overthinking, and left her questioning even the healthiest of relationships. Drawing on insights from The Body Keeps the Score by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk, Kristi explains why trauma isn't just something we remember—it's something our brains and nervous systems learn. She explores why we become hypervigilant after difficult experiences, how to recognize the difference between fear and wisdom, and why healing isn't about becoming impossible to hurt. This episode is about far more than dating. It's about recognizing the stories trauma teaches us, refusing to let old wounds make new decisions, and finding the courage to move forward anyway. Because healing isn't becoming fearless. It's learning to trust yourself enough to know that no matter what happens next, you won't abandon yourself. Your past may explain your story... But it doesn't get to write your future.   Disclaimer: Midlife Moments is intended for educational and informational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, mental health, legal, financial, or professional advice. The views and experiences shared in this episode are Kristi's own. If you are struggling with trauma, anxiety, or other mental health concerns, please seek guidance from a qualified healthcare or mental health professional.

Finding Your People: Why Friendships Matter More Than Ever in Midlife

Making friends as an adult isn't easy, but it might be one of the most important things you'll ever do. In this heartfelt episode of Midlife Moments, Kristi shares the story of how loneliness during one of the hardest seasons of her life led her to take a chance on something completely outside her comfort zone: meeting a stranger for coffee through Bumble BFF. What started as one cup of coffee grew into a close-knit circle of women who have become family. Together, we'll explore why friendships naturally change as we move through midlife, how different life stages can reshape our relationships, and why it's never too late to build a community that truly knows and supports you. Kristi also dives into fascinating research from the Harvard Study of Adult Development and the work of Brené Brown, revealing why meaningful relationships aren't just nice to have—they're essential for our happiness, health, resilience, and longevity. Whether you're feeling lonely, navigating a life transition, grieving a friendship, or simply longing for deeper connection, this episode is a reminder that your people may be closer than you think. Because sometimes, the friendships that change your life begin with one simple question: "Want to grab coffee?"   Disclaimer: This podcast is intended for educational and inspirational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, mental health, legal, financial, or professional advice. The views and experiences shared are my own. Please consult a qualified professional regarding your individual circumstances.

What Fresh Hell Is This? (The Sequel)

What happens when all those "random" symptoms you've been experiencing suddenly start adding up? The sleepless nights. The hot flashes. The heart palpitations. The itchy skin. The changes in libido and sexual arousal. The feeling that something just isn't quite right. In this episode of Midlife Moments, Kristi shares her personal journey leading up to a recent gynecologist appointment to discuss her own perimenopause symptoms. From late-night research sessions and conversations with friends to navigating treatment options and advocating for herself in the exam room, this episode is an honest look at what it means to seek answers during one of the biggest hormonal transitions of a woman's life. Kristi also shares what happened during her appointment, the treatment plan she chose, and the overwhelming sense of validation and hope she felt after finally having her concerns acknowledged and addressed. Along the way, she discusses: • Common perimenopause symptoms that many women don't realize may be hormone-related • Why perimenopause is about much more than hot flashes • Sleep disruption, libido changes, heart palpitations, and other overlooked symptoms • Why hormone testing isn't always straightforward during perimenopause • The importance of self-advocacy and finding a provider who listens • Resources and books that can help women better understand this transition • Why suffering in silence shouldn't be the expectation If you've ever found yourself wondering, "Is this normal?" or "Could this be perimenopause?" this episode is for you. Because you're not crazy. You're not alone. And you deserve to be heard. Disclaimer: This podcast is intended for educational and informational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, mental health, legal, financial, or professional advice. Always consult a qualified healthcare provider regarding your individual health concerns, symptoms, and treatment options.

Learning to Trust Again: Dating, Healing, and Letting Someone In After Divorce

After divorce, healing isn't always about learning to trust someone else again. Sometimes it's about learning to trust yourself. In this deeply personal episode of Midlife Moments, Kristi shares her journey through divorce, betrayal, healing, and the unexpected challenge of opening her heart again after convincing herself she'd be better off alone. Together, we'll explore what it means to grieve not just a marriage, but the future you thought you'd have. We'll talk about rebuilding a life you genuinely love, learning to trust your judgment again, and the surprising realization that the biggest fear after heartbreak isn't always getting hurt again—sometimes it's the possibility that something good might actually work. Whether you're divorced, healing from a difficult relationship, questioning your own judgment, or simply navigating a season of personal growth, this episode is a reminder that your story isn't over. There is life, joy, peace, and possibility on the other side of heartbreak. In this episode, we'll discuss: • Grieving the future you thought you'd have • The relief, freedom, and complicated emotions that often follow divorce • How therapy, friendship, and self-discovery helped rebuild confidence • Why betrayal can damage trust in yourself more than trust in others • The difference between protecting your heart and imprisoning it • Dating after divorce and learning to be vulnerable again • Why self-trust may be the most important form of trust you'll ever build Because healing isn't about making sure nobody can hurt you again. It's about trusting yourself enough to know you'll be okay no matter what happens. Disclaimer: This podcast is intended for educational and inspirational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical, mental health, legal, financial, or professional advice. Always consult a qualified professional regarding your individual circumstances.

Why Am I Responsible for Everything?

Have you ever felt like you're responsible for remembering everything? The appointments. The groceries. The birthday gifts. The school events. The bills. The vacation plans. What's for dinner. Every. Single. Day. In this week's episode of Midlife Moments, Kristi explores the invisible mental load so many women carry and why it's often exhausting in ways sleep can't fix. Through personal stories, humor, research, and honest reflection, she unpacks the hidden work of anticipating needs, managing responsibilities, and carrying the cognitive and emotional weight of family life. Kristi shares her experiences as a single mother and wife, the loneliness of carrying the load while longing for partnership, and the impact that years of invisible labor can have on our identity, relationships, and overall well-being. If you've ever found yourself asking, "Why am I responsible for everything?" this episode is for you. Because the mental load is real, you are not imagining it, and you were never meant to carry it all alone. Disclaimer: This podcast is intended for educational and inspirational purposes only and should not be considered medical, mental health, legal, financial, or professional advice. Always consult a qualified professional regarding your individual circumstances.