Dystopia. Dat Topia. Any Topia At All, Really.

Bitchin' About Some Witchin'

Get out your CrockPot, your cookbooks, your blenders and your full moon-charged crystals. That's right, this week our intrepid hosts take on the touchy yet misunderstood subject of WITCHES. Small disclaimer: All of their opinions on the matter are just that... Opinions. They don't know everything and they don't pretend to. They just have some thoughts on the matter. Mainly Briana. A lot of Briana thoughts here. Discussion topics include: Witchcraft, the patriarchy, the church, why men hate women, why the church hates women, why the church hates witchcraft, why women hate men, the practical magic of singing to cookie dough, Tommy's inability to figure out if "dude witch" is just a meatball sub and new revelations on Sam Neill.

We Finally Did An "Alien" Episode (Part 2)

They mostly made another "Alien" episode... mostly. That's right, this week we wrap up our discussion of the "Alien" franchise when talking about "Prometheus" (2012), "Alien: Covenant" (2017), "Alien: Romulus" (2025) and the FXX series "Alien: Earth" (2025). Discussion topics include: Corporations and their inability to stay out of politics, the creepy affectations of Timothy Olyphant, the eventual rise of artificial intelligence, Nazi robots and just how much one man can loathe everything about "The Boys"? SPOILER ALERT: Tommy hates it. A lot. A lot, a lot. Whole bunches, in fact. One could say... oodles.

We Finally Did An "Alien" Episode (Part 1)

Mount up, proud Weyland-Yutani employees! This week, we tackle the original entries in the "Alien" franchise starting with the OG goat "Alien" (1979), "Aliens" (1986), "Alien 3" (1992) and the seminal classic "Alien: Resurrection" (1997). Subjects discussed include: Billionaires and the search for youth, corporate America, the enduring fiscal solvency of Walmart and a whole bunch of thoughts on H.R. Giger and phallus..es? Phallusi? Phallus's? Tube shaped things...?

The V Word... No, Not That One.

Velcome back, dear mortals! This week we take some time to give some flowers to our beloved horror and discuss the recent achievement of the film "Sinners" starring MIchael B. Jordan (and some other people Bri is not going to remember because they look nothing like Michael B. Jordan) and take some time to talk about our plasma-addled neck-suckers, the eponymous VAMPIRE of the times. So take some iron, throw on some garlic and come along as we delve the crypts of our relationship with our favorite bloodfiends. Discussion topics include: The Oscars treatment of horror, MIchael B. Jordan's hypnotic abilities, types of vampires, types of vampires to avoid, and all things fanged and creepy.

The Absolute Wrong "Hill" Upon Which To "Silent"ly Die On

This week, we take a look (begrudgingly) at the film adaptations of the "Silent Hill" video game franchise. Are they good? No. Are they bad? Not entirely. But mostly, yes. So grab your static-riddled radio, your never-trusty flashlight and an unmistakably brown bottle of anti-psychotics and join us as we try to discern what went right and what went horribly, horribly wrong with these films. Topics include: Video game movies and the plethora of reasons we shouldn't make them, a growing concern over Princess Zelda, Tommy's ability to withstand trauma for the sake of those he loves and the promise of popcorn and a wide assortment of general buffoonery.