Unfertile & Unfiltered

Episode 20: Starting the IVM Process with Donor Sperm, Fertility Medications, and Preparing for Egg Retrieval

In this episode, we share a detailed update on where we are in our fertility treatment process as we officially begin the IVM (In Vitro Maturation) study. After months of testing, appointments, procedures, and waiting, we finally have a treatment calendar, medications, and a timeline leading up to egg retrieval. We walk through the full protocol, including birth control, Clomid, monitoring appointments, trigger shots, and what happens during the IVM process. We also discuss the possibility of being removed from the study if follicle development doesn't meet protocol requirements, how embryo creation differs with IVM, and what the next steps could look like if the study doesn't result in viable embryos. Throughout the episode, we talk openly about the realities of male factor infertility, using donor sperm, balancing optimism with realistic expectations, and the many decisions that come with fertility treatment. We also discuss the financial considerations of IVF and IUI, concerns about embryo creation, and what we're hoping for as we move into the next stage of treatment. Whether you're researching IVM, preparing for IVF, navigating male factor infertility, or simply following our journey, this episode provides a real-time look at the planning, uncertainty, and decision-making that happen before egg retrieval. Resources & Links Follow me on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/sidneyhdavis/ [https://www.instagram.com/sidneyhdavis/] Listen to previous episodes of Unfertile & Unfiltered for more conversations about male factor infertility, donor conception, microTESE procedures, fertility treatment, IVF, IUI, and family building.

EP 19 - IVM Study Update

After a week off for boys camp, girls camp, and a near trailer disaster on the side of the freeway, we are back with an update on where they are in their fertility journey. In this episode, they break down their upcoming IVM timeline, including birth control, stimulation medications, egg retrieval, and what the next several weeks are expected to look like. They also share an update on their donor sperm arriving at the clinic and discuss a recent conversation with Lauren, a donor-conceived advocate working to create new pathways for donor matching and education. The conversation also touches on the realities of navigating fertility treatment, learning to live with uncertainty, and the challenge of balancing healthy lifestyle changes without becoming consumed by trying to control every variable. Sidney shares her experience getting her first pap smear, reflects on some of the unexpected twists in their journey to parenthood, and talks about why she's focusing less on perfection and more on doing her best while letting go of the outcome. Connect with Lauren: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thespermqueen/ Website: batch.global [https://www.batch.global/?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAc3J0YwZhcHBfaWQPOTM2NjE5NzQzMzkyNDU5AAGnZWQ8tiLTow1Cqgsr6r6knt6NXwdy8XNz8Fr4iVvi0v03kLsWd2G1fdrs-Y0_aem_iIS5Alau3TlwrsZLvre12Q] If you're interested in sharing your own infertility story or joining the conversation, reach out to Sidney on Instagram. Thanks for following along and being part of the journey.

Episode 18: MicroTESE Recovery, Low Testosterone & Fertility Treatment Updates

In this episode, we give an update on where we’re at in our infertility journey, including Matt’s post-microTESE recovery, testing for low testosterone, and additional genetic testing for male factor infertility. We also talk through our first IVM study appointment, the frustration of fertility timelines, preparing for egg retrieval, and some of the lifestyle changes we’re making while trying to improve overall health and egg quality before treatment. We also get into the emotional side of using a sperm donor, what that process has looked like over time, and how infertility continues to impact different parts of life and relationships as things move forward.

Ep 17 - Reading the Journal Entries From Our Infertility Diagnosis

In this episode, we talk through Mother’s Day, the unexpected emotions that came with it, and what happened after reading back through old journal entries from the beginning of our infertility journey. We go back to the first few months of trying to conceive — the excitement, assumptions, optimism, and the gradual shift into confusion, testing, diagnosis, and grief after finding out we were dealing with severe male factor infertility and non-obstructive azoospermia. The episode covers: * The emotional shift from trying to prevent pregnancy to trying desperately to conceive * Reading journal entries from the beginning of the process * The emotional impact of failed cycles, testing, and the microTESE surgery * Mother’s Day while navigating infertility * The pressure of hope, faith, and expectations during infertility * Processing grief differently as a husband and wife * Looking back at how quickly life changed over a few months

Ep 16 Breaking Down "Three Makes Baby": What We Learned About Building a Donor-Concieved Family (Updated Podcast)

In this episode, we’re breaking down the book Three Makes Baby: How to Parent Your Donor-Conceived Child by Jana M. Rupnow [p/1732549419?crid=MIIQ3JMCD888&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.4KraNq46VOc4H9zU69HMkHt0BL3ueSZ7C-Oxl9iJdg2JtbNZO_KvSwtbrB0sPVzoKl0GALk6ebkbs2hf1lR8gTBQBffGe2wwOrRR-eqBPjCINGgiYz6Prr3yMRdPFf-aXL1aTDBUkSZ8suMIVPhApqUB4AQdF6Ml2V5OyRMGrFIXa0nscitMnyCoPgLLs9Fufp8YSfsg8Ahmh-VBkio_uxOuVjmQRzpTky5VFtj95NY.o9Le5MHV2KdMu1aYRJMDUKN5MyKe2s3H8HDMVEWa5rQ&dib_tag=se&keywords=three+makes+baby&qid=1767500800&sprefix=three+make,aps,189&sr=8-1&linkCode=sl1&tag=sidneyhdavis-20&linkId=d0a27c9a9c6e23dc16ce79d5cfa3c1f4&language=en_US&ref_=as_li_ss_tl] and sharing our honest thoughts after reading it. If you’re navigating male factor infertility, azoospermia, or considering building a family through donor conception, this book is one of the most comprehensive resources we’ve come across. It focuses less on the medical side and more on the emotional, psychological, and identity aspects of raising a donor-conceived child. In this episode, we walk through what the book actually covers, including: * The emotional weight of infertility and how to process it as a parent * Whether or not to tell your child they are donor-conceived—and why openness is now widely recommended * Common fears like feeling like a “real” parent, bonding concerns, and fear of rejection * Social stigma, family dynamics, and how to handle difficult conversations * How to choose a sperm donor (anonymous vs. open ID, identity considerations, future contact) * When and how to talk to your child about their story—from early childhood through teenage years * How to navigate identity, half-siblings, and the possibility of meeting a donor * And one of the biggest takeaways: how to hold both grief and gratitude at the same time We also share our personal reactions to the exercises in the book—especially the ones that helped us uncover emotions we didn’t even realize we were feeling. If you’re at the beginning of your donor conception journey or trying to understand what it really looks like to raise a donor-conceived family, this episode gives you a straightforward, unfiltered overview of what this book teaches and why it might be worth reading. For reference, this is a breakdown of what the chapters cover: Introduction: An Emotional Decision Chapter 1: Are You Ready to Tell? * Explore Your Reasons Chapter 2: Why Tell? * Get Comfortable * Experts Say Disclose * Telling Is Healthy * Secrets Aren’t the Best Protection Chapter 3: How to adddress the most common concerns about donor conception? Concern #1 Emotional Distress: * What If My Child Is Upset? * Complicated Grief * Distinguish Your Feelings from Your Child’s Concern #2: Parental Legitimacy * Parent-Child Attachment * Broken Bonds Concern #3 Social Differences * Social Strain * Social Strategy * Privacy vs. Secrecy * Confronting Shame * Embracing Differences Concern #4 Family/Cultural Differences * Acclimating to New Family Chapter 4: Choosing a Donor Connecting to Your Donor * Donor Profile Selection Process Anonymity Not Guaranteed * The internet is a resource * Social media influence * Donor Regulation * Self-Report Psychological Testing Known Donation * Preparing for known donation Embryo Adoption vs. Embryo Donation Future Contact Potential Genetic WonderEpigenetic Influences Chapter 5: when and how to talk about it * When Is the Right Time to Tell? * Talking over the Years—Make It Your Story * Shifting from your story to your child's * Baby years * Preschool years * Middle-childhood years * Teenage years - Finding Identity and Meaning * How to talk about half siblings * how to talk about grief Five Ways to Handle Social Situations: The Five Ds Chapter 6 - Finding treasure Book link: Three Makes Baby [p/1732549419?crid=MIIQ3JMCD888&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.4KraNq46VOc4H9zU69HMkHt0BL3ueSZ7C-Oxl9iJdg2JtbNZO_KvSwtbrB0sPVzoKl0GALk6ebkbs2hf1lR8gTBQBffGe2wwOrRR-eqBPjCINGgiYz6Prr3yMRdPFf-aXL1aTDBUkSZ8suMIVPhApqUB4AQdF6Ml2V5OyRMGrFIXa0nscitMnyCoPgLLs9Fufp8YSfsg8Ahmh-VBkio_uxOuVjmQRzpTky5VFtj95NY.o9Le5MHV2KdMu1aYRJMDUKN5MyKe2s3H8HDMVEWa5rQ&dib_tag=se&keywords=three+makes+baby&qid=1767500800&sprefix=three+make,aps,189&sr=8-1&linkCode=sl1&tag=sidneyhdavis-20&linkId=d0a27c9a9c6e23dc16ce79d5cfa3c1f4&language=en_US&ref_=as_li_ss_tl]