SAME SHIFT DIFFERENT WAY

Holding your horses

Tina's off to a quiet start, whilst Big D thinks about manifesting a large appendage. Then they get straight into the spring feel of the moment hopefully avoiding narcissists in their gardens. The subject of today is growth and emergence and how that shows up in our lives. Tina mentions her own fears of showing up and emerging into the world, and how others with chronic illness can have fears around overwhelm or collapse if they emerge too hard or too fast. Developmental trauma can also cause us to brace ourselves or retract, and Tina likens flow to the world of water - how there are stages and cycles, and honouring them, just like the seasons of nature.  Dennis talks about how pulling back is often a way to stay safe, and he shares his journey with running and applying his safety brakes in that part of his life to demonstrate how fears or retractions can work and how a small shift can change everything. They also notice that we can "practice" playing with our fear boundary, in a safer way that gives the message to your brain and body that we "can" grow more than we think, whilst still feeling safe, aka "titrate" to restore trust, and how it might look different for people.  Dennis shares about anticipatory fear, and they look at why that happens from a nervous system perspective, and that it's not a bad thing in essence, it's a survival thing! T and D talk a bit about the start of the year of the fire horse (in chinese astrology) and how it aligns with this topic of growth and harnessing the energy of the moment - but noticing how our language and thinking around energy can impede our use of of it. They notice the nuance between power and energy and how that differentiation can change a lot - do we need to harness the power of love for example, or is it infinite? Maybe power is infinite, whereas we associate energy as limited so we hold back through fear of "not enough". They talk about over-extending and going into burnout when we ignore the stages and timings of growth. They look at how we can slow burn rather than fireworks with our energy. Growth and expansion starts with our foundation, like good food, sleep, "training"  before spring growth can happen. Are we giving too much and not respecting the stages and then collapsing or running out too soon?  Tina and Dennis get to their last listener question of the podcast season, and guide us how to notice when we are over extending or pushing too hard, how to go through your body to regulate and match your body energy tone, and decoupling any thoughts of failure from slowing down or getting fatigued.  For more information, coaching or to ask a listener question please go to: * www.omnamo.nl [http://www.omnamo.nl]  or email Dennis at dennis@omnamo.nl [dennis@omnamo.nl]  * www.tinaclarkewellness.com [http://www.tinaclarkewellness.com]  or email Tina at tina@tinaclarkewellness.com [tina@tinaclarkewellness.com] Feeling the urge to work with this? Come and join us on April 25th, 2026 in Arnhem for a day of practice on the theme of Unfolding to Grow [https://omnamo.nl/diensten/one-day-retreat/].

Resistance is needed for growth and change

Dennis and Tina start today with being on time, 2am dog turds, a surprised husband and central heating. They qet into the topic and start talking about resistance and their initial thoughts on it, including through the lens of Tom Jones. They observe how our brains prefer same-ness and routine and why resistance can be a good thing, rather than a pathology. They notice how resistance can be something we bump up against and can feel uncomfortable or confronting, but can we then enquire what might it be that we need? Dennis talks about knocking on the door of possibility and seeing how far we can go, and the meeting point of expansion and resistance and what dialogue can arise from that place. They talk about how we might recognise resistance in ourselves or others, including how it can feel like rejection and how resistance is inter-relational. when we are curious about our resistance, we can notice patterns like whether we tend to push through it, or move away from it too soon.  They get into how our bodies show resistance and where their own resistance tends to show up (with the related beliefs that underpin the resistance) and the early years of programming which leads us into boundaries in relation to resistance: what is boundary and what is resistance? Dennis tells us about a childhood singing moment and how it showed up in adulthood. Is resistance a fear of rejection or is resistance rejection?  They dive a bit deeper into the enquiry around resistance and what resistance might be telling us. They discuss how resistance might be asking for more safety or time.  The vulnerable moment of change that we all have to face, like hermit crabs moving to bigger homes.  T and D go int the more somatic aspects and how resistance shows up in our body: the muscles, the skeletal structure, the digestive system, the fascia or body fluids. They look through an IFS (Internal Family Systems) lens at resistance, and what parts might be taking over in those moments. Dennis tells us the story of the loyal soldier to illustrate a part that might need reassurance that it can stop fighting and put down it's metaphorical weapon. Come and join us in Arnhem for our One Day Retreat "Unfold to Grow" on April 25th! Learn more [https://omnamo.nl/diensten/one-day-retreat/] For more information, coaching or to ask a listener question please go to: * www.omnamo.nl [http://www.omnamo.nl]  or email Dennis at dennis@omnamo.nl [dennis@omnamo.nl]  * www.tinaclarkewellness.com [http://www.tinaclarkewellness.com]  or email Tina at tina@tinaclarkewellness.com [tina@tinaclarkewellness.com]  https://omnamo.nl/diensten/one-day-retreat/

Living with Uncertainty

Dennis and Tina briefly reflect on the workshop they held at the weekend, and announce their new one on April 25th 2026 in Arnhem, Netherlands called "Unfolding to Grow" to experience harnessing a natural sense of timing and natural energy of growth rather than needing to force or push our way through with too much effort. They then get right into this weeks topic of Living with Uncertainty. They acknowledge the scariness of of the associated feelings, particularly relevant in these times with geopolitical change occurring as well as environmental and even financial. They look at how the sheer amount of information available at our fingertips is evolutionarily too much, but especially on top of whatever we are managing and processing in our own cosmos of our body and life. Dennis pays a little tribute to our autonomic nervous system that controls many things in our body that we don't even need to think about or control - like digestion or breathing. They discuss the art of finding balance in our focus - not too much outside, nor too inward, and the benefits of being in contact with our immediate environment, like the ground under our feet or the trees outside the window.  Tina and Dennis look at what uncertainty is and how it shows up in our body and mind, like contraction and gripping in body and breath and overthinking, in an effort to gain come control. They discuss the certainty or uncertainty of our breath for some people - and how can we find some sense of stability in an uncertain body, and how Tina uses "okayness" as a  They look at the false perceptions through social media that everyone looks like they are feeling or doing great, which in turn can make us feel 'less than', and the american/english Vs dutch approach to the question "how are you?" Tina knows all too well how people with chronic illness never know really how to answer that question! Dennis explains some ways that uncertainty can be felt in people with developmental trauma, and how uncertainty comes up in relation to death and dying, but also stepping into living. Our western society creates so many certainties but can we take on a more buddhist approach of trusting change as a certainty. They look at other things that we can rely on to be able to allow uncertainty, and the trouble with being individualistic. They discuss how the brain deals with uncertainty and the unknown and how the body can help support trusting the unknown. They throw in some more somatic or embodied ways to deal with uncertainty and of course have a great listener question to tackle.  For more information, coaching or to ask a listener question please go to: * www.omnamo.nl [http://www.omnamo.nl]  or email Dennis at dennis@omnamo.nl [dennis@omnamo.nl]  * www.tinaclarkewellness.com [http://www.tinaclarkewellness.com]  or email Tina at tina@tinaclarkewellness.com [tina@tinaclarkewellness.com]  https://omnamo.nl/diensten/one-day-retreat/

With Grief, Not Over it

It's that oh so painful emotion of grief - we all know this one, even if we haven't identified it by name. Dennis and Tina get into it by recognising the many ways that grief can show up in our lives - it's not just about someone dying...who knew! Dennis tells us how the japanese have  emotional and poetic words for feelings that we don't even recognise or have words for in more western languages.  They discuss how solitary grief feels, through it's very nature we feel like our pain of grief is so isolating and unique to us and how it feels difficult to reach out to others in the midst of our grief, even though it's very beneficial...especially if we don't have pressure to explain it or express it in a particular way.  They look at in more detail in when grief shows up - feelings of loss of identity or sense of your future, feelings of emptiness or despair. Dennis describes one model of the "wave" of grief and yet that grief is actually non-linear. They talk about how grief doesn't need to be something you let go of, it can be something that you find a way to live alongside, and they go further to notice that one grief can bring up old grief that hasn't been acknowledged or given space yet still lives within us.  Dennis and Tina share their personal experiences of grief, which can partner with relief, recognition of grief suppression, needing a safe container for grief and the interesting bodily expressions when we feel safe enough to allow grief to come through and how grief can hide deeply within us. They discuss the social and cultural norms around grief and loss, like holding it in, wailing it out, or encasing it or expressing it in black clothing.  They mention the Kübler Ross 5 Stages of Grief, and it's helpful edges as well as it's limitations, and the more modern way of understanding grief. Dennis notices how feelings of aloneness can be triggered by grief and loss, and yet gives us the gift of opportunity to integrate the reality that part of life is being alone.  Tina dives a bit into the grief that is associated with health challenges, from the loss of stability of health through to chronic illness where grief penetrates the past, the present and the future. She talks about hers and others experience where grief is often not recognised in chronic illness, or it's expected to come and then "you get over it" and it's not like that - it comes up time and again, and that's ok.  They of course go on to explore some helpful somatic and bodily approaches to grief and how to meet it and support it. They summarise about some of the ways that developmental trauma and medical trauma can bring grief and then they get to the listener question!  For more information, coaching or to ask a listener question please go to: www.omnamo.nl [http://www.omnamo.nl]  or email Dennis at dennis@omnamo.nl [dennis@omnamo.nl]  www.tinaclarkewellness.com [http://www.tinaclarkewellness.com]  or email Tina at tina@tinaclarkewellness.com [tina@tinaclarkewellness.com]

How to really deal with anger?

Tina and Dennis have a quick catch-up and chat about how they are trying to slow down a bit, particularly after the holiday season and counteract that "new year, new you" bollocks. The topic of the day is Anger. What is this emotion really and what does it want? They recognise how tricky it is for all of us, particukarly if we are in Northern Europe, where Anger is categorised or badmouthed depending on gender and in the context of different cultures. They talk about how we are afraid of anger and why, and what this emotion arises for. They talk about the power of anger and how it can get distorted or deformed and what that looks like. It also turns out that there aren't just 50 shades of grey, but 50 shades of anger too. They look at how incomplete or suppressed anger can show up and how much energy is required to keep that shit down! They discuss how anger and wanting space are related, and boundaries and the inner message of anger.  Dennis and Tina then get down to the nitty gritty and reframe what anger is in the nervous system, how childhood and socialisation, as well as lack of agency can form and shape anger in us. They go on to share how anger can be related to, processed and what to DO with it. This can differ in different people and communities - and how people with chronic illness can work with feelings of anger without getting depleted or feeling like there is nowhere or no-one for it to land (on). How making choices and finding agency can be the perfect completion for anger - who knew! Dennis informs us about a wonderful symbol of the energy of anger from Japan called Fudo Myoo (not to be mistaken as a "puppet") and how it could be a useful image for grounded and empowered anger. They also give us some great somatic and other embodied ways of feeling and processing anger, and being aware of not bypassing it with rationality or positivity. They help us stay in our bodies with anger, and not feeling "out of control" or letting rage take over.  They finish as always with the listener question which may help us all, giving different options for when anger comes up in relationship to another, without causing relational damage.  For more information, coaching or to ask a listener question please go to: * www.omnamo.nl [http://www.omnamo.nl]  or email Dennis at dennis@omnamo.nl [dennis@omnamo.nl]  * www.tinaclarkewellness.com [http://www.tinaclarkewellness.com]  or email Tina at tina@tinaclarkewellness.com [tina@tinaclarkewellness.com]