Burn After Listening

Maui's Missing Nips + OnlyFans Kingpin + AMPUTEE ASSASSIN

In our comeback episode, we are staring down the barrel of World War III and diving headfirst into a news cycle that feels like a rejected Quentin Tarantino script. We kick things off by roasting Disney’s horrifying decision to CGI-erase Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson's anatomy in the new live-action Moana trailer. Then, we look at the grim reality of corporate airline travel after British Airways allegedly baked a corpse in a first-class galley. Plus, Mark Zuckerberg's peak Silicon Valley hubris as he tries to build an AI robot boss to run Meta, the massive smut-empire power vacuum left by the sudden death of secretive OnlyFans billionaire Leo Radvinsky, and the ultimate true-crime mind-bender: reverse-engineering how a quadruple amputee cornhole player allegedly pulled off a solo drive-by shooting in a Tesla. Buckle in, keep your receipts, and lock your doors. Common sense is officially dead.

Meth, Penguins, and the Shrek Cold War

Florida Man fights a gator then loses game of life to cops, Japan bans flashy baby names, Russia targets Shrek, and penguin poop cools the planet. Total chaos.