How I Got Here

Shwetha Mangal (Part 2) — Strength Training & Breaking Cultural Myths That Keep Us Unhealthy

This is Part 2 of our conversation with Shwetha Mangal [https://www.strengthwithshwetha.com/]. Here is Part 1 if you missed it: Shwetha is a women’s health and fitness coach who runs Strength with Shwetha and coaches through The Boss Body Revolution. She has a community of over 50K followers sharing fitness insights for South Asian women. In this second half, we dig deeper into some practical questions: Can you eat whatever you want if you work out? How do you lose belly fat? Is it OK to lift heavy weights when you’re older?The best sources of protein for vegetarians Shwetha talks about her own struggles with the all-or-nothing mindset in her career, shares how she’s teaching her kids that “attitude is everything,” and reminds us why self-care isn’t just bubble baths and massages…it’s taking care of your physical, mental, and emotional health. Are you subscribed yet? Don’t miss future episodes. Subscribe to stay in the loop. Brought to you by QTR [http://qtr.ai] — The cortisol-reducing productivity planner Topics We Discussed * Can you eat whatever you want if you work out regularly? * Exercise vs. food: Are they really independent? * Why exercise isn’t punishment for eating * What a vegetarian fitness coach eats daily * The six main protein sources for vegetarians * How Shwetha preps her meals for the week * The truth about losing belly fat * Perimenopause, menopause, and muscle loss * Why women start losing muscle after age 23 * Cultural fear-mongering: “Don’t color your hair or you’ll get white hair” * Living for today vs. worrying about tomorrow * The “always something” mindset vs. the all-or-nothing mindset * Being okay with being imperfect * Teaching kids it’s okay to mess up * Controlling what you can control * Self-care beyond nails and massages * Breaking self-care into small, doable pieces * The power of genuine representation Insights from Shwetha “Even broccoli in excess is bad for you. Water can kill you in excess, right? No matter what your age, weight, height, sex, gender, sexual orientation, everybody should move their body. Everybody should exercise.” — Shwetha “Exercise is not like a punishment for eating or eating is not like an award for exercising, right? They are two totally independent facets of your life.” — Shwetha “Life is too short to not eat biryani or chocolate. So yes, enjoy your food, but at the same time, there’s moderation, right? Eat your vegetables also, drink your water as well.” — Shwetha “It is easier to eat 500 calories less if somebody wants to lose weight than to burn 500 calories. Because when you expend more energy, you eat more. That’s why you’ll see ultra marathoners—they’re not skinny because they need to eat because they’re hungry.” — Shwetha “I feel that vegetarians have it very easy when it comes to protein. What I have to do is open a box. Greek yogurt, cottage cheese, whey protein, tofu, paneer, and eggs—those are the six main sources.” — Shwetha “Fear is not a way to live life. In our culture, it’s like ‘don’t color your hair, otherwise you’ll get white hair.’ I’m like, why am I worrying about tomorrow, which I don’t even know? I’ll do what I want to do to look my best today. I don’t care about tomorrow.” — Shwetha “I’ve always had this ‘always something mindset’ rather than the all-or-nothing mindset. If not this, let me at least do this kind of a thing.” — Shwetha “Being okay with being imperfect, being okay with—you know, that’s a big flex.” — Shwetha “I would not have people over at my home because my home is always messy. Then I started realizing my home is never [clean]—only when the cleaners come and go, that next two hours. So I’m losing out on all that quality time that fills my cup with friends and family because I’m waiting for that perfect home.” — Shwetha “Attitude is everything. You cannot control that you’re going to Costco, you’re going to Costco. But you can control your reaction. You can control by not freaking out or spoiling your day on somebody else and their behavior.” — Shwetha “Self-care is not selfish. Self-care does not only mean getting your nails and massages. Self-care also means taking care of your physical, mental, emotional health—and finding ways to make that accessible and doable, breaking it down into small doable pieces for people to actually be able to do it.” — Shwetha This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit swamiphoto.substack.com [https://swamiphoto.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

Shwetha Mangal — As South Asian Women, We Were Never Taught to Prioritize Fitness

I tried something new for this episode…I co-hosted it with my friend Naga. She’s been following today’s guest, Shwetha Mangal [https://www.strengthwithshwetha.com/], for years. When she suggested I interview Shwetha, I thought it would be more meaningful if she joined me. Shwetha is a women’s health and fitness coach who runs Strength with Shwetha and coaches through The Boss Body Revolution. She has a community of over 50K followers sharing fitness insights for South Asian women. At 39, after two decades of hating her body and being told her metabolism was “ruined,” Shwetha discovered strength training and flexible dieting. She stopped judging her body for how it looked and started loving it for what it could do. She got certified to help other women break free from the same struggles. Shwetha shares the brutal reality of prepping for a bikini competition at 40 (eating 800 calories, losing her period, eating uncontrollably afterward), why she still works with a coach despite being one herself, and how she helps women navigate the complex relationship with food, money, and fitness in their 40s. Are you subscribed yet? I interview highly successful people to learn how they got to where they are. Brought to you by QTR [http://qtr.ai/] — The digital planner to crush every quarterly goal. Topics We Discussed * Shwetha’s secret of looking way younger than her age * Growing up in a progressive Marwadi family of doctors * Why everyone needs to move * The all-or-nothing mindset that sabotages most people * The South Asian money mindset: jewelry vs. investing in health * Is self-care selfishness? * Her bikini competition at 40 * Do women look masculine from lifting weights? * Living with thyroid disorders * Why she works with a bodybuilding coach despite being a coach herself * How to combat emotional eating * Can you eat whatever you want if you work out regularly? Insights from Shwetha “Our bodies are machines. What happens to a machine when you don’t move? Our parents didn’t have to exercise because they were moving so much. But we’re sitting in front of the computer for 10 hours. Your body wants movement, your body wants good nutrition, your body wants sleep.” — Shwetha “Everybody knows they need to eat less and move more. But why are people not doing it? One is the all-or-nothing mindset. We wait for the perfect time to start. We don’t think that 5 minutes or 10 minutes add up to anything. Or they start on a plan that’s totally not sustainable, try for two weeks, and then think they suck—when the truth is the plan sucks.” — Shwetha “It’s willful suffering versus unwillful suffering. Either I eat my vegetables now to take care of my gut willfully, or later I might have to suffer unwillfully with hospital bills. It’s insurance—you pay now or you pay later.” — Shwetha “We all spend our money, time, and energy on what we value. For me, buying gold to put in a locker for my children to use after I die? Never my value. There’s nothing right or wrong about it—we all have different values.” — Shwetha “I’ve been told by other women—by my friends over the years—that I’m selfish because I put myself first. It’s not that I ignore my children and go to the gym. I will wake up at 5:00 if I need to. But I still get called selfish because I say no to things.” — Shwetha “When I was 22, I hired a trainer. After two months I looked in the mirror and said, ‘Oh my god, I have muscles, I’m starting to look like a man,’ and I stopped working out with her. When I compare my biceps with a lot of my male cousins now, I have bigger biceps than them and I’m very proud of that.” — Shwetha “We do not have the genetics or testosterone to build muscle like men do. The women you see who are really muscular—they work their butts off to get to that level. I’ve been lifting for seven, eight, nine years now. I wish I looked like a man, but I don’t. You realize how hard it is.” — Shwetha “After the competition, I found myself eating without stopping. I knew I was full but I could not control myself. I was eating to a point of throwing up. My coach’s only advice was ‘don’t eat like an a*****e.’ He didn’t warn me that I might lose my period, that my hormones might get messed up, that I would be this hungry.” — Shwetha “My children came to watch me compete. My husband asked, ‘Are you sure you want the children to come?’ I said yeah, they should know there’s no shame in this. They should know age is just a number. They should know you can have goals and work hard.” — Shwetha “Emotional eating is so common. Most of us do that. The first step is awareness. Understanding your triggers. When you’re bored, your brain is craving novelty. When you’re anxious, your nervous system is in fight or flight. Have a game plan for each emotion—when I’m anxious, what do I do? When I’m lonely, what do I do?” — Shwetha This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit swamiphoto.substack.com [https://swamiphoto.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

Rajesh Setty — The Right Way to Connect With Influential People

I interviewed Rajesh Setty [https://rajeshsetty.com/], serial entrepreneur, startup mentor, keynote speaker, and 20-time author. Rajesh published his first novel at age 13 and five more before he turned 17. He’s written over 20 books, 2K blog posts, mentored over 2K founders at Founders Institute, and been part of the founding team of over 10 startups collectively valued at more than $150 million. In 2014, Rajesh was diagnosed with Parkinson’s. Soundarya Balasubrami, who works closely with him, describes: “When I met him in 2021, he was in one of the toughest physical phases—he couldn’t walk outside his home, eat on his own, or even lift a glass of water. And yet, when he met me, he lifted me up at a time when I was struggling, even though my struggles were tiny compared to what he was going through.” Rajesh, who's introduced me to some of the most influential people in my network, shares his philosophy of “net-giving” over networking, the power of being fully present, and how slowing down taught him to “out-see, out-think, and out-execute.” Are you subscribed yet? I interview highly successful people to learn how they got to where they are. Brought to you by QTR [http://qtr.ai] — The time management planner for people who want to out-execute. Track your one daily highlight and achieve in 13 weeks what most can't in a year. Topics We Discussed * How Rajesh became a serial entrepreneur * The sunk cost fallacy and local vs. global maxima * How to know when to quit vs. when to persist * Stop networking, start net-giving * Trust, timing, and thoughtfulness in introductions * Building trust with famous people over decades * How to stand out when reaching influential people * The art of being fully present * Thoughts as paying guests in your mental real estate * The Most Interested Person - Rajesh’s upcoming book * Living with Parkinson’s: Accept the unchangeable * Advice for aspiring entrepreneurs in the AI age * Beyond Luck - Creating unfair advantages through giving Insights from Rajesh * “Work on awesome projects with awesome people, and if you keep that as the North Star, amazing things will happen. Once I say yes to that project, I put my heart and soul into it.”— Rajesh Setty * “Stop networking, start net-giving. The moment it’s net-giving, you have to network to give something of value. And once you add enough meaningful value, the law of reciprocation will kick in.”— Rajesh Setty * “I always look at three things before making an introduction: Trust, timing, and thoughtfulness. Trust means I can vouch for you. Timing means the person is in the right place to receive this. Thoughtfulness means there’s something meaningful in it for them, not just you.”— Rajesh Setty * “People make the mistake of misunderstanding the value of time for different people in different capacities of power. If someone’s hour is worth a thousand dollars and yours is worth a hundred, you need to put in ten hours of work before asking for one hour of their time.”— Rajesh Setty * “As Susan Scott puts it, ‘there is no guarantee that any single conversation can change the trajectory of your life, career, business, and relationship. But any single conversation can.’ This could be the conversation for both of us that changes the trajectory of both our lives—but if you’re not present to it, you miss it.”— Rajesh Setty * “As Carlo Mahfouz says ‘be so present that you will disappear.’ When I am there, everything is about you and nothing is about me. That’s the level of presence.”— Rajesh Setty * “Any thought is a paying guest in your mind. It’s a guest that should pay you, not a guest you should pay. Thoughts should bring you value for residing in your mental real estate.”— Rajesh Setty * “Parkinson’s taught me to slow down. When you slow down, you can see more. When you see more, you can think more. When you out-see, you can out-think. When you out-think, you can out-execute. When you out-execute, you can be outstanding.”— Rajesh Setty * “As Mahatria puts it, ‘accept the unchangeable, change the changeable, remove yourself from the unacceptable.’ There’s no cure for Parkinson’s—I can’t change it, and I can’t remove myself from it. So the only option I have is to accept the unchangeable.”— Rajesh Setty * “The ability to practically give meaningful help at scale with very low incremental cost—if you do that, you automatically get an unfair advantage. Eighty percent of your help is good but goes unnoticed. Twenty percent will want to reciprocate, and that last ten percent is big enough to fuel all your projects.”— Rajesh Setty * “My goal in life is simple: Once I wake up, how fast can I meaningfully contribute to someone, somewhere in the world through my writing, actions, gifts, insights, or generosity? Some days I succeed in the morning. Some days it takes all day. But I always aim for it.”— Rajesh Setty * “We always give labels to events and experiences—joyful, fantastic, disastrous. But I reduce the labels to only two: Is it a gift or is it a lesson? If it’s a lesson, I learn and grow from it. If it’s a gift, I’m joyful and grateful for it. That gives me perspective.”— Rajesh Setty This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit swamiphoto.substack.com [https://swamiphoto.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

Mahesh Guruswamy (Part 2) — CTO of Kickstarter on How to Tell Your Boss You'll Miss the Deadline

If you missed part 1 [https://swamiphoto.substack.com/p/mahesh-guruswamy-cto-of-kickstarter] of my conversation with Mahesh Guruswamy [https://www.maheshguruswamy.com/], Chief Technology Officer at Kickstarter and author of How to Deliver Bad News and Get Away With It [https://www.amazon.com/How-Deliver-Bad-News-Away/dp/B0D7FHTTNN/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2LT3B5ZRWX8EZ&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.NTVM4en1Xyuyy5dVnCjrqBtQH6l3O6UkLG4hQ27WP1oLp3v2_lhjJfgA0CAjaCsLNZejjIxS6LEverCIhBUrBoqXA4uyOJXomUNQgX3pl9VPxMFF_UvA8u8wPgWVLVCq.sjmxHMJ-TaHhzKt8s0wYVKHjsJHXfuZ27xJfs657oJc&dib_tag=se&keywords=how+to+deliver+bad+news&qid=1744495280&sprefix=how+to+deliver%2Caps%2C200&sr=8-1], you can watch it here: In this part, we get more into the tactics on how to give bad news: * What most people get wrong when delivering bad news * The core framework of delivering bad news * How to handle underperforming employees * What to do when you miss a deadline * How to do a performance improvement plan * As an engineering manager, how to balance technical work and management work * How to deal with smart people who lack soft skills * How to align incentives across teams, partners, and customers * How to disagree and commit If you’re not subscribed yet, please do: Brought to you by QTR [http://qtr.ai/] — The time management app for anyone who wants to achieve in a quarter what most won’t in a year. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit swamiphoto.substack.com [https://swamiphoto.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

Mahesh Guruswamy — CTO of Kickstarter Shares How to Deliver Bad News and Get Away With It (Part 1)

I interviewed Mahesh Guruswamy [https://www.maheshguruswamy.com/], Chief Technology Officer at Kickstarter and author of How to Deliver Bad News and Get Away With It [https://www.amazon.com/How-Deliver-Bad-News-Away/dp/B0D7FHTTNN/ref=sr_1_1?crid=2LT3B5ZRWX8EZ&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.NTVM4en1Xyuyy5dVnCjrqBtQH6l3O6UkLG4hQ27WP1oLp3v2_lhjJfgA0CAjaCsLNZejjIxS6LEverCIhBUrBoqXA4uyOJXomUNQgX3pl9VPxMFF_UvA8u8wPgWVLVCq.sjmxHMJ-TaHhzKt8s0wYVKHjsJHXfuZ27xJfs657oJc&dib_tag=se&keywords=how+to+deliver+bad+news&qid=1744495280&sprefix=how+to+deliver%2Caps%2C200&sr=8-1]. Mahesh always saw himself as an average kid growing up in Chennai—and assumed he’d stay that way. Today, he’s an executive at a major U.S. tech company, and I was curious how he changed his trajectory. We talk about his journey as an immigrant, dealing with racism, being broke, working night shifts at McDonald’s, and how he ultimately climbed the ranks in tech. We also dive into real-world scenarios from his book, including: * How to talk to your boss when you’ve missed a deadline * How to address poor performance with an employee * How to tell a client their project is delayed If you manage people, this one’s a must-watch. Subscribed yet? Don’t miss these conversations with some of the world’s most brilliant minds. Brought to you by QTR [http://qtr.ai/] — The time management app that helps you achieve this quarter what most won’t in a year. Topics We Discussed * Growing up in Chennai and moving to the US * Life in the US as an immigrant * Feeling "average" growing up—and how that shifted * Early career struggles and the decision to never go back * Climbing the ladder: how he grew from engineer to executive * What Mahesh did differently than his peers * The role of risk-taking in his career journey * The real meaning behind “get away with it” * Influence of Stephen King on Mahesh’s writing style * His writing routine, challenges, and how the book came together * Advice for aspiring authors * Traditional vs. hybrid vs. self-publishing—what he learned * Common types of tough conversations leaders face * What most people get wrong about delivering bad news * The core framework Mahesh uses: empathy, kindness, ownership, and a path forward * Why writing is more effective than talking (especially in leadership) * What happens when you don’t handle tough conversations well * Does giving tough feedback get easier over time? * How to handle underperforming employees * What to do when you miss a deadline (with team or customers) * The importance of breaking big projects into smaller milestones * Owning mistakes and rebuilding trust with stakeholders * Navigating performance improvement plans with empathy * The difference between empathy vs. sympathy, and staying objective during performance reviews * How to stay technical while managing a team * Dealing with brilliant individuals who lack soft skills * Aligning incentives across teams, partners, and customers * How Mahesh combines Product + Engineering leadership at Kickstarter * His thoughts on "disagree and commit" and how to do it authentically * Building teams with aligned behaviors and shared leadership tenets * Keeping teams focused with simple, visible goals * Why bottom-up planning works best—and when to override it Insights from Mahesh “Success isn’t about being born exceptional—it’s about showing up, doing the work, and saying yes when others hesitate.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “Climbing the ladder is overrated. My career was a lattice—sometimes sideways, sometimes backwards—but always forward in learning.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “You don’t grow by staying safe. Every bold move I made—quitting jobs, switching roles, taking risks on a visa—brought me closer to who I am today.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “Delivering bad news isn’t about being harsh—it’s about being clear, kind, and honest. People remember how you made them feel, not just what you said.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “The hardest conversations are where leadership really shows up. If you can’t deliver tough news with empathy, you’re not ready to lead.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “I didn’t write a book to teach others. I wrote it to make sense of my own mistakes. Writing is just thinking clearly in public.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “PowerPoint hides complexity. Writing forces clarity. If you can’t write it down clearly, you probably don’t understand it well enough.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “As a leader, your job is to underwrite decisions—not micromanage them. Stay close enough to guide, but far enough to let people grow.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “Empathy is not weakness. It’s the strength to hold someone accountable while still caring about what happens to them next.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “Your team isn’t your family. You can’t fire your family. But you can build trust, set expectations, and lead with fairness.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “Every customer wants to feel taken care of. Even when you mess up, ownership and transparency go a long way.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “Kindness and clarity are not opposites. The best feedback I’ve given was also the hardest to say—but I said it with care.”— Mahesh Guruswamy “When your career is over, no one will remember your title. They’ll remember how you made them feel—and how you helped them grow.”— Mahesh Guruswamy This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit swamiphoto.substack.com [https://swamiphoto.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]