#4 TJ Scott: "I thought I was going to be a PREACHER" | Back Row Revival

#4 TJ Scott: "I thought I was going to be a PREACHER" | Back Row Revival

For years, TJ believed ministry was the calling on his life. The pulpit wasn’t just part of his upbringing. It became his identity. In this episode of Back Row Revival, the conversation turns deeply personal as TJ reflects on growing up inside church culture, preparing for ministry, and slowly confronting the emotional weight that came with it. From homeschool culture and Pentecostal churches to therapy, EMDR, and faith after deconstruction, this episode explores the questions many former church kids carry quietly for years. Some of the hardest things to untangle are the things you were taught were sacred. In This Episode * Growing up in church culture * Feeling called into ministry * Religious conditioning and fear * EMDR therapy and buried memories * Identity outside the church * Faith, trauma, and deconstruction * Reprocessing childhood experiences as an adult

#3 Bucky Sitsler: “I’m Very Well Loved By People… Except Me.” | Back Row Revival

In this episode of Back Row Revival, Bucky Sitsler opens up about the pressure of ministry, identity, addiction, religious fear, losing everything, and the night he nearly ended his life. From growing up terrified of being “left behind” during the rapture… to preaching from a platform while privately falling apart… this conversation is raw, uncomfortable, honest, and deeply human. This is not a polished success story. It’s a conversation about shame, self-worth, collapse, faith, and what happens when the image everyone loves no longer matches the person inside. Topics include: • Growing up in church and fear-based Christianity• Ministry pressure and identity loss• Addiction and self-medication• Public failure• Suicidal thoughts and rock bottom• Church culture and accountability• Fatherhood and rebuilding life• Faith after collapse Follow Back Row Revival for more long-form conversations about faith, life, failure, culture, and redemption. #podcast #christianpodcast #mentalhealth #faith #deconstruction #church #testimony #addiction #selfworth #depression

#2: Are Aliens Real? The Church, UFOs & the Perry Stone Controversy

Are Aliens Real? The Church, UFOs & the Perry Stone Controversy | Back Row Revival Podcast (Bonus Episode) The internet is buzzing — Perry Stone claims pastors were secretly briefed by the government about an upcoming alien disclosure. But is this divine revelation, or just another distraction? TJ, John Mark, and Bucky break it all down in this unfiltered bonus episode. In this episode: - The Perry Stone "secret meeting" alien disclosure controversy - UFOs, fallen angels, and the Book of Enoch — what's the connection? - Why the government's alien file releases might just be a political distraction - Should aliens threaten your faith? (Spoiler: No.) - How celebrity pastors use fear and sensationalism to sell books and fill camp meetings - Gen Z is done with the sensationalism — and that's a good thing Our take: Love God, love people, think for yourself, and don't let social media steal your peace. New episodes dropping soon — including Bucky's full story. Don't miss it! Follow the show and leave us a review if you appreciate honest, grounded conversations about faith and culture.

#1: I Did Everything Right… And Felt Nothing | Faith, Doubt & Deconstruction

What happens when a lifetime of belief starts to feel… empty?In this first episode of Back Row Revival, we talk to one of our hosts John Mark Smithson about growing up in church, inheriting faith, and the moment things stop making sense. This is a real conversation about doubt, identity, and what it feels like when belief no longer feels real.If you’ve ever questioned what you believe—or why you believe it—you’re not alone.⸻Timestamps00:01:06 — Raised in church: when faith isn’t a choice00:02:02 — “But what about your weed days?”00:08:36 — When belief is all you’ve ever known00:13:06 — The moment things stop making sense00:16:56 — A prayer, an expectation… and silence00:17:20 — “This is real… how could you love me?”00:26:06 — Are we choosing faith or inheriting it?00:32:06 — Seeing it differently from the outside00:39:06 — Learning to think for yourself00:45:06 — Honest disagreement and tension00:52:06 — Redefining what faith looks like01:09:56 — 51 years centered around Sunday⸻Topics Coveredfaith, doubt, deconstruction, church upbringing, questioning belief, identity, spirituality, leaving church, personal story, christianity discussion⸻About the PodcastBack Row Revival is a space for honest conversations about faith, doubt, and everything in between. No pressure, no pretending—just real talk.Subscribe for more conversations like this.Full episodes available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and YouTube.

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