“You're Not Lazy, You're Depleted: Invisible Labor & the Burnout Epidemic”

“You're Not Lazy, You're Depleted: Invisible Labor & the Burnout Epidemic”

This is my summer playlist of podcast where I guested this past year. In this appearance on “Burnout, Invisible Labor & the Feminist Fight to Rest” on Feminist Founders, I talk with host Becky Mollenkamp about how women’s invisible labor – caregiving, administration, and housework – contributes to their higher rates of burnout. I’ve alluded to this dynamic all of the first season, but I go into much more depth with Becky Mollenkamp on Feminist Founders about how this impacts women, their relationships, their bodies and we talk about simple, game-changing strategies. Take a listen to my conversation with Becky on Feminist Founders: 💬 Discussed in This Episode * What burnout really is (and why it’s more than just being tired) * How gendered expectations and invisible labor feed chronic overwhelm * The critical role of embodiment and nervous system work in healing * Why capitalist and white supremacist systems depend on our burnout * The illusion of spaciousness and what it means to actually rest * How meditation doesn’t have to look like sitting still and saying "om" * The power of giving yourself permission to not volunteer at the damn PTO * How to plan your schedule to not be a human version of a doctor's waiting room * Why moms get guilted and dads don’t—and what that says about our systems 📚 Resources Mentioned "Burnout" by Emily & Amelia Nagoski [https://amzn.to/3HO35St] "Fair Play" by Eve Rodsky [https://amzn.to/3TzVIk0] "Sacred Rest" by Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith [https://amzn.to/45wWaqH] "Essentialism" by Greg McKeown [https://amzn.to/4ldhBkS] "Rest is Resistance" by Tricia Hersey [https://amzn.to/4eietSS] The Nap Ministry on Instagram [https://www.instagram.com/thenapministry/] 🎧 This show is part of the Feminist Podcast Collective [https://feministpodcasterscollective.com/], a community of progressive creators reclaiming media through storytelling and solidarity. 📙 Get "Liberate Your Business" by Becky Mollenkamp at https://liberateyourbusiness.com/ [https://liberateyourbusiness.com/] 00:00 Introduction to Summer Playlist Series on Just Rest 01:22 Introduction to Feminist Founder's series on Women's Invisible Labor 02:33 New Awareness of Burnout 03:11 Definition of Burnout 06:11 Invisible Labor and Its Impact on Women 08:25 Cultural Pressures on Women that Contribute to Burnout 14:13 Strategies for Managing Burnout 22:00 Creating Space for Rest and Joy 26:17 The Importance of Mindfulness and Somatic Practices 32:55 Collective Trauma and the Impact of Modern Life 34:58 Strategies for Avoiding Burnout 38:21 Understanding Rest and Its Many Forms 43:30 Creativity, Consumption, and the Need for Spaciousness Connect with Becky Mollenkamp & Feminist Founders Website: https://feministfounders.co/ Threads: https://threads.com/@beckymollenkamp Substack: https://feministfounders.substack.com LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/feminist-business/ Connect with Nicole Havelka Newsletter [https://defythetrend.substack.com/] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-havelka-35762022/] Work with Nicole [https://defythetrend.com/contact/] Leave a Voice Memo [http://speakpipe.com/justrest] The Calm Calendar Club is a brain-friendly planning community for neurodivergent adults, ADHD minds, and sandwich-generation caregivers who are tired of systems that don’t fit real life. We help you build a flexible, values-based calendar that reduces chaos and protects your energy. This low-cost, community-based program is ready for you at defythetrend.com/calm-calendar. Thank you to the people who helped make this show happen. Send me a message via Speakpipe [https://www.speakpipe.com/JustRest]. A proud member of the Feminist Podcasters Collective [https://feministpodcasterscollective.com/].

Season 1 is a Wrap. The Expansion Is Just Beginning.

Season 1 of Just Rest is officially done — and I went live on Substack to celebrate, say thank you, and make some big announcements about what's coming next, including a major life change that starts this fall. (Note: the sound of the episode isn’t the quality I usually have because of being live and some tech issues.) In this live session, we talk about: * The Season 1 Cozy Wrap Party highlights — trivia, favorite clips, and community * 12 episodes, 700+ downloads, and the people who made it happen * A reading of every single name who helped crowdfund this podcast into existence * The summer season: guest appearance episodes dropping every other week * The Year of Expansion — what it is, where I'm headed first, and why I'm doing it * An invitation for you to help shape Season 2 Want to support the Year of Expansion? Here's how: * 🎙️ Become a Rest Rebel Collective subscriber — defythetrend.substack.com [https://defythetrend.substack.com/] * 💛 Become a Founding Member — defythetrend.substack.com [https://defythetrend.substack.com/] * 🙏 Help fund Radical Dharma Camp — https://square.link/u/Q8yx3Fqq * 🎧 Suggest a Season 2 guest or topic — defythetrend@gmail.com [defythetrend@gmail.com] * 🎤 Leave a voice memo on SpeakPipe — speakpipe.com/justrest [https://www.speakpipe.com/t0hqub17ewruabhv2v06owiorui9xuhf] * 📨 Send a note of encouragement — defythetrend@gmail.com [defythetrend@gmail.com] Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Just Rest Podcast and Season One Wrap-Up 02:20 Just Rest Summer Playlist 04:12 YOUR suggestions for Season 2 06:43 Life Update: Year of Expansion and Nomadic Living 10:22 Exploring New Places and Networking Opportunities 12:36 Ways to Support the Podcast and Community 14:46 Help Nicole Attend Radical Dharma Camp CONNECT WITH NICOLE HAVELKA: Newsletter [https://defythetrend.substack.com/] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-havelka-35762022/] Work with Nicole [https://defythetrend.com/contact/]Leave a Voice Memo [http://speakpipe.com/justrest] The Calm Calendar Club is a brain-friendly planning community for neurodivergent adults, ADHD minds, and sandwich-generation caregivers who are tired of systems that don’t fit real life. We help you build a flexible, values-based calendar that reduces chaos and protects your energy. This low-cost, community-based program is ready for you at defythetrend.com/calm-calendar. Thank you to the people who helped make this show happen. Send me a message via Speakpipe [https://www.speakpipe.com/JustRest]. A proud member of the Feminist Podcasters Collective [https://feministpodcasterscollective.com/].

Your Rest Affirmation for Hard Days (Save This One)

Season one ends the way it began — with radical permission. In this final episode, Nicole compiles the "Dear Rest Rebels" messages from every guest this season, and the result is something you'll want to save, return to, and play on repeat. Hear wisdom from Dana Tenille Weekes, Jordan Maney, Jacki Hayes, Taina Brown, Elaina Ramsey, Ixchel Lunar, Becky Mollenkamp, Malik Turley, and Catharine Montgomery — each offering their own unique reminder that you are enough, you are worthy, and it is safe to rest. And Anna DeShawn gets the final word, because honestly? She earned it. Bookmark this one. Come back to it when the world is loud and your body is tired. This is your permission slip, on repeat. Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Dear Rest Rebels Compilation Episode 02:39 Dear Rest Rebels Notes 07:13 Season Wrap-Up and Future Plans CONNECT WITH GUESTS Dana Tennille Weekes: https://therestofuspodcast.com/ [https://therestofuspodcast.com/]Jordan Maney: https://substack.com/@thejordanmaney [https://substack.com/@thejordanmaney]Jacki Hayes: https://www.jackihayes.co/ Taina Brown: info@tainambrown.com [info@tainambrown.com]Ixchel Lunar: https://ixchellunar.com/ [https://ixchellunar.com/]Malik Turley: https://tapasmovement.com [https://tapasmovement.com]Catharine Montgomery: https://thebettertogetheragency.com [https://thebettertogetheragency.com]Becky Mollenkamp: https://beckymollenkamp.com/ [https://beckymollenkamp.com/]Elaina Ramsey: https://www.faithchoiceohio.org Anna DeShawn: https://queernewspod.substack.com [https://queernewspod.substack.com] CONNECT WITH NICOLE HAVELKA: Newsletter [https://defythetrend.substack.com/] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-havelka-35762022/] Work with Nicole [https://www.calendarpa.com/@defythetrend] Thank you to the people who helped make this show happen. Send me a message via Speakpipe [https://www.speakpipe.com/JustRest]. A proud member of the Feminist Podcasters Collective [https://feministpodcasterscollective.com/].

The Messy Truth about Indie Podcasting & Burnout with Guest Interviewer Taina Brown

What happens when the host gets interviewed? In this special episode, Nicole hands the mic to friend, coaching colleague, and Messy Liberation podcast co-host Taina Brown — and the result is one of the most honest, wide-ranging conversations yet. From the behind-the-scenes chaos of launching a podcast to the theological roots of rest as resistance, Nicole opens up about what she's learned, what's surprised her, and what's coming next for Just Rest and for her own life. If you've ever wondered what a burnout coach actually believes about rest — and whether she walks her own talk — this one's for you. What we talked about in this episode: * What it actually felt like to finally launch a podcast years in the making * The messy, imperfect reality of building workflows behind the scenes * Why irregular release cadence hasn't hurt the show * How guests have expanded Nicole's own understanding of burnout * The surprising double-edged sword of doing work you're passionate about * The role of COVID in reshaping how people think about work and burnout * How Nicole's background as a clergy person and interfaith practitioner informs her approach to rest * Rest practices Nicole has adopted — or deepened — from her guests * Why burnout is not a personal failure — it's a systemic one * The invisible labor carried by people socialized as women and how it compounds burnout * Why you cannot productivity hack your way out of exhaustion * Nicole's Friday screen-free practice and the joy of staring out a window while it snows * What's coming in Season 2 * Nicole's upcoming year of nomadic living — and why she's doing it Organization(s) doing good in the world: New American Welcome Center (Champaign-Urbana): https://nawc.universityymca.org/ Amica Center for Immigrant Rights: https://amicacenter.org [https://amicacenter.org] Chapters: 00:00 Introduction to Just Rest and Taina Brown 04:27 Grounding breath 05:26 The Journey of Podcasting: From Idea to Reality 08:54 The Messy Start to Just Rest 13:40 Letting Go of Perfectionism in Podcasting 17:39 Expanding Ideas about Burnout 19:53 The Dual Nature of Passion: A Double-Edged Sword 22:21 Theological Perspectives on Burnout and Rest 25:29 The Radical Nature of Rest 30:38 Seasonal Rhythms and Personal Practices 36:25 Understanding Burnout: It's Not Your Fault 42:44 Naming Priorities in Planning 45:14 The Weight of Perfectionism 47:43 Embracing Rest in Nature 50:58 Supporting Immigrant Rights Groups 52:46 Plans for the Pod and Nomadic Living CONNECT WITH GUEST INTERVIEWER TAINA BROWN: Website: https://www.ifthenand.org/ Messy Liberation Podcast: https://messyliberation.com/ CONNECT WITH NICOLE HAVELKA Newsletter [https://defythetrend.substack.com/] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-havelka-35762022/] Work with Nicole [https://defythetrend.com/contact/] The Calm Calendar Club is a brain-friendly planning community for neurodivergent adults, ADHD minds, and sandwich-generation caregivers who are tired of systems that don’t fit real life. We help you build a flexible, values-based calendar that reduces chaos and protects your energy. This low-cost, community-based program is ready for you at defythetrend.com/calm-calendar. Thank you to the people who helped make this show happen. Send me a message via Speakpipe [https://www.speakpipe.com/JustRest]. A proud member of the Feminist Podcasters Collective [https://feministpodcasterscollective.com/].

Grounding in Joy: Choosing Rest, Faith, and Radical Purpose with Anna DeShawn

What does it look like to stay in the fight — week after week, story after story — without losing yourself in the process? In this episode, Nicole sits down with Anna DeShawn, founder of E3 Radio and The Qube, and host of the Ambie Award-winning Queer News podcast, for a rich conversation about burnout, joy as a practice, faith as a foundation, and what it really means to build something that sustains you. Anna's journey from corporate burnout to full-time entrepreneur and queer media powerhouse is a case study in trusting the pivot — and in taking care of yourself first so you can keep advocating for your community. In this episode: * How COVID pushed Anna from corporate burnout to full-time entrepreneurship * What it felt like to relearn how to work on her own terms * The sacred meditation corner in Anna's home that grounds her before every episode of Queer News * Why reporting the good news is just as important as bearing witness to the hard stuff * The difference between battles and wars — and why showing up matters even when you lose a round * Anna's deeply rooted faith background (Black Lutheran and Baptist — yes, both) * Joy as a choice and a commitment — and why Anna quits the moment joy leaves * The new relaunch of The Qube: building the largest searchable database of Black and Brown podcasts, and why discoverability is an equity issue * Why podcasters are the storytellers and public record-keepers of our time Organizations you should support: * Affinity Community Services — serving Black queer women on the South Side of Chicago for 30 years. affinitycommunityservices.org [https://affinitycommunityservices.org] * Sisters in Cinema — a nonprofit supporting Black women, girls, and gender-expansive media makers with free programming and a 35-seat brick-and-mortar theater on the South Side. https://sistersincinema.comsistersincinema.com [http://sistersincinema.com] P.S. Become part of the joy in Anna’s new community on Substack [https://queernewspod.substack.com]! CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction to Just Rest and Anna Deshawn 02:45 Moment for a Deep Breath 03:55 Burnout, Leaving Corporate American in COVID 06:33 Redefining Work and Success 09:34 Wellbeing in Entrepreneurship 12:07 Authenticity in Podcast 17:14 Staying Grounded Amidst the Bad News 19:37 Seeing the Big Picture in Activism 20:47 Faith and Identity in Activism 26:33 The Intersection of Faith and Identity 28:03 Faith and the Podcasting Journey 30:51 Letting Go of Control in the Journey 32:19 The Importance of Self-Care 34:09 Finding Joy in Work 39:01 Relaunching The Cube 42:55 Creating Access in Podcasting 44:51 Ways to Rest and Resist 49:41 Dear Rest Rebels 50:22 Highlighting Organizations Doing Good in the World CONNECT WITH ANNA DESHAWN Website:https://e3radio.fm Substack:https://queernewspod.substack.com [https://queernewspod.substack.com] Instagram:https://instagram.com/annadeshawn Facebook: https://facebook.com/annadeshawn LinkedIn:https://linkedin.com/in/annadeshawn CONNECT WITH NICOLE HAVELKA: Newsletter [https://defythetrend.substack.com/] LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicole-havelka-35762022/] Work with Nicole [https://defythetrend.com/contact/] The Calm Calendar Club is a brain-friendly planning community for neurodivergent adults, ADHD minds, and sandwich-generation caregivers who are tired of systems that don’t fit real life. We help you build a flexible, values-based calendar that reduces chaos and protects your energy. This low-cost, community-based program is ready for you at defythetrend.com/calm-calendar. Thank you to the people who helped make this show happen. Send me a message via Speakpipe [https://www.speakpipe.com/JustRest]. A proud member of the Feminist Podcasters Collective [https://feministpodcasterscollective.com/].