Why You’re Not Doing Your Great Work (And the Identity Saboteur Keeping You Stuck) with Dr. Amanda Crowell | 412

Why You’re Not Doing Your Great Work (And the Identity Saboteur Keeping You Stuck) with Dr. Amanda Crowell | 412

Somewhere along the way, most of us got completely bamboozled about what doing “great work” actually means. It became about titles, applause, LinkedIn optics, and chasing gold stars from people who don’t even know us. Meanwhile, the work that actually lights us up? The stuff that feels like us? Yeah… that got buried under obligation, expectation, and a never-ending to-do list. In this episode, Nicole sits down with Dr. Amanda Crowell [https://www.amandacrowell.com/] — cognitive psychologist, TEDx speaker, and author of Great Work [https://www.amazon.com/Great-Work-2nd-Sacrificing-Everything/dp/B0F8QK73WK/ref] — to unpack why so many women are stuck doing work that looks good on paper but feels like absolute garbage in real life… and how to get back to work that actually matters. We get into: * What “great work” actually means (hint: it has NOTHING to do with external validation) * How to identify the difference between true desire vs. insecurity-driven comparison * Why your biggest clues might come from… jealousy  * The concept of identity saboteurs — and how they keep you playing small * Why women especially struggle with choosing themselves (hello, conditioning) * Why your great work doesn’t have to be big, public, or profitable to matter * And how to finally stop waiting for the “right time” and start doing the damn thing Because here’s the truth: The only way to know if it’s your great work… is to actually do it. Thank you to our sponsors! Visit Upwork.com [http://upwork.com] right now and post your job for free! Families are better when they’re working together… go to myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK [http://myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK] for $30 off your Skylight Calendar. Become a Fora Advisor today at Foratravel.com/woman [http://foratravel.com/woman]  Connect with Amanda: Website: https://www.amandacrowell.com/ [https://www.amandacrowell.com/]  Book: https://www.amazon.com/Great-Work-2nd-Sacrificing-Everything/dp/B0F8QK73WK/ref [https://www.amazon.com/Great-Work-2nd-Sacrificing-Everything/dp/B0F8QK73WK/ref]  LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-amanda-crowell-51188130/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/dr-amanda-crowell-51188130/]  TedEx: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWp87GXDvEk [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sWp87GXDvEk]  Related Podcast Episodes: * All The Ways We Get In Our Own Way with Thais Gibson | 235 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/all-the-ways-we-get-in-our-own-way-with-thais-gibson-235/id1493225373?i=1000669899234] * Healing Mental And Emotional Wounds with Stephanie Kwong | 234 [https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/healing-mental-and-emotional-wounds-with-stephanie/id1493225373?i=1000669661168] * Your Brain Is a Filthy Liar with Bizzie Gold | 361 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/your-brain-is-a-filthy-liar-with-bizzie-gold-361/id1493225373?i=1000736387719] Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts [http://apple.co/thisiswomanswork] | Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7G264BHcz5ulGyl2Y5hFLP] | Amazon Music [https://a.co/d/j61LyYs] | YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@ThisIsWomansWork] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices [https://megaphone.fm/adchoices]

On Sabbaticals, Reinvention, and Getting Older | Unfiltered & Unhinged

What happens when a woman who’s spent her entire life optimizing, producing, planning, and performing… decides to stop? In this unfiltered solo episode, Nicole Kalil shares the real reason behind her 3-month sabbatical across Europe — and it’s about a whole lot more than travel. Nicole opens up about the fear of untethering from productivity, the discomfort of rest, aging as a woman, solo dining anxiety, motherhood, identity, and what it means to leave behind the familiar long enough to uncover who you’re becoming next. Because maybe the things that scare and excite us at the exact same time are the very things pointing us toward the life we actually want. In This Episode, Nicole Talks About: * Why she’s taking an 11-week sabbatical through Europe * Turning 50 and why aging feels liberating instead of limiting * The pressure women face to stay small, young, and polished * Why slowing down can feel terrifying * The power of doing something “impractical” anyway * Rediscovering yourself by leaving the familiar behind * What envy and jealousy might actually be trying to tell you Thank you to our sponsors! Visit Upwork.com [http://upwork.com] right now and post your job for free! Families are better when they’re working together… go to myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK [http://myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK] for $30 off your Skylight Calendar. Become a Fora Advisor today at Foratravel.com/woman [http://foratravel.com/woman]  Connect with Nicole: Subscribe to Nicole’s Substack: https://nicolekalil.substack.com/ [https://nicolekalil.substack.com/]  Related Podcast Episode: * When a One-Star Review Means You’ve Officially Arrived | Unfiltered & Unhinged [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/when-a-one-star-review-means-youve-officially/id1493225373?i=1000765121408] * How To Take A Sabbatical with Katrina McGhee | 336 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/how-to-take-a-sabbatical-with-katrina-mcghee-336/id1493225373?i=1000722372831] * Solo Adventures: A Guide for Women Travelers with Megan Grant | 265  [https://podcasts.apple.com/tw/podcast/solo-adventures-a-guide-for-women-travelers-with/id1493225373?i=1000681824301] Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts [http://apple.co/thisiswomanswork] | Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7G264BHcz5ulGyl2Y5hFLP] | Amazon Music [https://a.co/d/j61LyYs] | YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@ThisIsWomansWork] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices [https://megaphone.fm/adchoices]

Same Ask, Different Outcome: The Double Standard in Negotiation with Attia Qureshi | 411

Let’s get one thing straight: women are not bad at negotiating. They’re doing it just as often—if not more—but getting worse outcomes. So no, the wage gap isn’t because women just need to “ask better.” That’s lazy advice… and frankly, bullshit. In this episode, negotiation expert Attia Qureshi [https://www.attiaqureshi.com/]—founder of Atiya Qureshi Consulting, co-author of Never Settle [https://www.amazon.com/Never-Settle-Persuasion-Negotiation-Skills/dp/1668070375], and trained in FBI-informed negotiation strategies—breaks down the uncomfortable truth: women are playing a game that wasn’t designed for them to win the same way men do. Same words, same ask… wildly different outcomes. And she’s not here with fluff—she’s here with strategies that actually work.  Because here’s the deal: opting out of negotiation doesn’t protect you—it guarantees you get less. What We Cover: * Why women are negotiating just as much—but still losing * The double bind: too nice = weak, too assertive = “difficult” * The internal negotiation happening in your own head * Why relationships matter more than you think (yes, it’s annoying, but it’s real) * How to use data as your secret weapon without triggering defensiveness * The “we strategy” that helps women get better outcomes (even if it feels unfair) * Why over-preparing can actually screw you over * How to handle rejection and turn a “no” into a “not yet” At the end of the day, negotiation isn’t about becoming someone you’re not. It’s about learning how to advocate for yourself in a system that doesn’t always reward you for it—and doing it anyway. Because you don’t get what you deserve. You get what you’re willing to ask for—and hold your ground on. Thank you to our sponsors! Visit Upwork.com [http://upwork.com] right now and post your job for free! Families are better when they’re working together… go to myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK [http://myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK] for $30 off your Skylight Calendar. Become a Fora Advisor today at Foratravel.com/woman [http://foratravel.com/woman]  Connect with Attia: Website: https://www.attiaqureshi.com [https://www.attiaqureshi.com/]  Book: https://www.amazon.com/Never-Settle-Persuasion-Negotiation-Skills/dp/1668070375 [https://www.amazon.com/Never-Settle-Persuasion-Negotiation-Skills/dp/1668070375]  LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/attiaq/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/attiaq/]  IG: https://www.instagram.com/attiaq/ [https://www.instagram.com/attiaq/]  Substack: https://substack.com/@attiaqureshi [https://substack.com/@attiaqureshi]  Related Podcast Episodes: * The 3 N’s - Negotiation, Networking & No with Kathryn Valentine | 327 [https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/the-3-ns-negotiation-networking-no-with-kathryn/id1493225373?i=1000717474870] * Be A Likeable Badass with Alison Fragale | 230 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/be-a-likeable-badass-with-alison-fragale-230/id1493225373?i=1000668271931] * 162 / Compensation Myths with Kelli Thompson [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/162-compensation-myths-with-kelli-thompson/id1493225373?i=1000633339617] If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts [http://apple.co/thisiswomanswork] | Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7G264BHcz5ulGyl2Y5hFLP] | Amazon Music [https://a.co/d/j61LyYs] | YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@ThisIsWomansWork] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices [https://megaphone.fm/adchoices]

Why Good Leaders Are Quitting (And We’re Letting It Happen) with Melissa Doman | 410

Leadership is supposed to be a privilege… so why does it feel like a slow burn to the ground? In this raw, unfiltered continuation of the leadership mental health conversation, Nicole Kalil sits down again with organizational psychologist and workplace mental health expert Melissa Doman [https://www.melissadoman.com/] to unpack what’s really happening behind the scenes of leadership today — and why the good ones are dangerously close to walking away. Because here’s the truth no one wants to admit: we expect leaders to be everything — strong, empathetic, decisive, available, perfect — with no room for human error. And then we wonder why burnout is skyrocketing and leadership pipelines are drying up. This episode goes beyond surface-level advice and into the uncomfortable reality: * Leaders are human (shocking, we know) * Unrealistic expectations are breaking them * And we all play a role in either making it better… or making it worse Melissa brings both expertise and real talk to the table — from leadership archetypes (hello, frustrated martyr) to the “sea otter” model of healthy leadership (yes, it’s a thing and yes, you want it). Together, they challenge the outdated narratives, call out toxic expectations, and offer a radically simple starting point: act like leaders are people. Because if we don’t figure this out? The good leaders won’t stay. And what’s left… is not a future anyone wants. Thank you to our sponsors! Visit Upwork.com [http://upwork.com] right now and post your job for free! Families are better when they’re working together… go to myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK [http://myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK] for $30 off your Skylight Calendar. Become a Fora Advisor today at Foratravel.com/woman [http://foratravel.com/woman]  Connect with Melissa: Website:https://www.melissadoman.com/ [https://www.melissadoman.com/] Book:https://www.amazon.com/Cornered-Office-Leadership-Mental-Health/dp/139435035X [https://www.amazon.com/Cornered-Office-Leadership-Mental-Health/dp/139435035X]  IG: https://www.instagram.com/thewanderingmel/ [https://www.instagram.com/thewanderingmel/] LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissadoman1/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/melissadoman1/] Related Podcast Episodes: * What Happens When Leadership Becomes Unsustainable: Leader Mental Health with Melissa Doman | 403 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/what-happens-when-leadership-becomes-unsustainable/id1493225373?i=1000761472400] * Leadership Unblocked (The Hidden Beliefs Sabotaging Your Ability To Lead) with Muriel M. Wilkins | 367 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/leadership-unblocked-the-hidden-beliefs-sabotaging/id1493225373?i=1000739460021] * What Good Leaders Can Learn from Bad Bosses with Mita Mallick | 351 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/what-good-leaders-can-learn-from-bad-bosses-with-mita/id1493225373?i=1000730740022] Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts [http://apple.co/thisiswomanswork] | Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7G264BHcz5ulGyl2Y5hFLP] | Amazon Music [https://a.co/d/j61LyYs] | YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@ThisIsWomansWork] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices [https://megaphone.fm/adchoices]

Making It Without Losing It: The Truth About Motivation & Burnout with Jess Ekstrom | 409

You hit the goal. You check the box. You reach the milestone. And instead of feeling fulfilled… you’re already onto the next thing. Yeah — that’s the problem.  In this episode of This Is Woman’s Work, Nicole sits down with Jess Ekstrom [https://jessekstrom.com/] — founder, bestselling author, and reformed anxious achiever — to call out the toxic relationship so many high-achieving women have with motivation, success, and self-worth. And spoiler alert: it’s not a motivation problem. It’s a meaning problem. Because somewhere along the way, ambition got tangled up with anxiety, productivity got confused with purpose, and we decided we’d finally feel good enough… later. After the next goal. The next milestone. The next arbitrary number. Sound familiar? We cover: * The difference between anxious ambition vs. inspired ambition * How to redefine success so it actually feels like success (not just looks good on paper) * The “purpose test” that will instantly expose if you’re chasing approval or impact * Why you keep moving the goalpost — and how it’s burning you out * How comparison can either crush you… or prove what’s possible Because here’s the uncomfortable truth: if you keep tying your worth to what’s next, you will never feel like enough — no matter how much you accomplish. Thank you to our sponsors! Visit Upwork.com [http://upwork.com] right now and post your job for free! Families are better when they’re working together… go to myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK [http://myskylight.com/WOMANSWORK] for $30 off your Skylight Calendar. Become a Fora Advisor today at Foratravel.com/woman [http://foratravel.com/woman]  Connect with Jess: Website: https://jessekstrom.com/ [https://jessekstrom.com/]  Book:https://jessekstrom.com/makingit/ [https://jessekstrom.com/makingit/]  Workshop: https://micdropworkshop.com/ [https://micdropworkshop.com/]  IG: www.instagram.com/jess_ekstrom [http://www.instagram.com/jess_ekstrom]  FB: www.facebook.com/jessekstrom [http://www.facebook.com/jessekstrom]  X: www.twitter.com/jess_ekstrom [http://www.twitter.com/jess_ekstrom]  Tiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@jessekstrom [https://www.tiktok.com/@jessekstrom]  LI: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jess-ekstrom-59160342/ [https://www.linkedin.com/in/jess-ekstrom-59160342/]  Related Podcast Episodes * 206 / A Better Way to Define Success with Stella Grizont [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/206-a-better-way-to-define-success-with-stella-grizont/id1493225373?i=1000652003058] * 7 Keys To Unlock Your Dynamic Drive with Molly Fletcher | 229 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/7-keys-to-unlock-your-dynamic-drive-with-molly-fletcher-229/id1493225373?i=1000668016920] * 160 / Motivation with Kate Tracy  [https://podcasts.apple.com/fr/podcast/160-motivation-with-kate-tracy/id1493225373?i=1000631682911] Share the Love: If you found this episode insightful, please share it with a friend, tag us on social media, and leave a review on your favorite podcast platform! 🔗 Subscribe & Review:Apple Podcasts [http://apple.co/thisiswomanswork] | Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/7G264BHcz5ulGyl2Y5hFLP] | Amazon Music [https://a.co/d/j61LyYs] | YouTube [https://www.youtube.com/@ThisIsWomansWork] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices [https://megaphone.fm/adchoices]