47. Am I Jealous of my Best Friend?

47. Am I Jealous of my Best Friend?

Ever caught yourself thinking “I’m happy for you… but why do I feel weird about it?” 😅 In this episode, we’re getting uncomfortably honest about envy in friendships — the kind that shows up when your bestie levels up, and suddenly your brain decides it’s a competition. We break down why jealousy hits hardest with the people closest to us, what psychology says is actually going on, and how to spot the difference between malicious envy (yikes) and benign envy (the glow-up version ✨). Expect spicy truths, a little Aristotle, and a Daddy Yankee quote you didn’t know you needed. ✅ Key Takeaways * Envy usually shows up when someone has something you want, and they feel similar to you. * Friend groups come with “roles,” and when someone levels up in your lane, it can shake your identity. * Envy can slide from insecurity into resentment if it stays unspoken. * Benign envy can be fuel: let it motivate you, not isolate you. * Honest conversations and self-worth are the antidote to envy spirals. 🔗 Resources * Aristotle’s definition of envy (classic, dramatic, still accurate). * Research on benign vs malicious envy and how envy can motivate goal pursuit.

46. Festivals 2.0: How it could be done

If your 21-year-old self could see your current festival packing list, they would call you a sellout. Your current self would call it hydration and planning. 💧🧃📋 In this episode, we unpack Festival Era 2.0: the shift from “survive the mud and the 3am kebab” to soft festivaling. Think better toilets, earlier bedtimes, selective lineups, and the brave decision to pay for comfort like the responsible adult you never thought you’d become. We talk about how festivals hit different in your late twenties and early thirties, why “VIP” starts sounding less like a scam and more like a safety plan, and how the real headliner becomes: making it home with your dignity intact. ✨ Key takeaways * 🏃‍♀️➡️🛋️ Your festival era evolves from endurance sport to curated experience. * 🧠🧻 Comfort is not laziness. It is strategy. * 🎶📅 Lineup FOMO decreases. Schedule planning increases. * 👯‍♀️❤️ Your festival “crew” gets smaller, and the friendships get better. * 🧊😴 Recovery time becomes part of the itinerary. Yes, Monday matters. 🔎 Resources & sources  * 📊 Statista reports on the global music festival market size * 🎟️ Eventbrite and Pollstar festival attendance and industry data * 📰 Blog and industry commentary: * Festicket Blog * Ticketmaster Insights * Resident Advisor features * 💬 Community discussions and lived-experience takes: * Reddit threads in r/festivals and r/Coachella on aging festival culture * 📺 YouTube commentary on festival burnout, VIP trends, and “soft festivaling” * 🎧 Podcast conversations on lifestyle shifts in late twenties and early thirties (various culture podcasts)

45. Highs and Lows: Substance Use in the Modern Era

In Highs & Lows: Substance Use in the Modern Era 🎙️✨, we’re taking a clear-eyed, non-judgmental look at what “substance use” really means today. From the 1990s prescription opioid boom 💊 to the 2020s rise of synthetic drugs like fentanyl ⚠️, we trace how the landscape has shifted and why the risks can look so different now. We also dig into the generational changes: why Gen Z is drinking less 🍷⬇️, why vaping is up 🚬⬆️, and how mental health awareness 🧠 and digital life 📱 are reshaping choices and behaviors. Along the way, we cover: * Definitions: use vs misuse vs substance use disorder (SUD) ✅ * What’s changing in legal, prescription, illicit, and emerging substances 🌍 * The real physical, psychological, and social risks 🧩 * Cultural shifts like “sober curious” 🥤, wellness alternatives 🌿, and new therapy research 🔬 If you or someone you know needs support, we’ve included resources below  Resources ❤️ If in immediate danger call your local emergency number: * EU 112; * Austria Ö3 Kummernummer 116 123, * Rat auf Draht (for young people) 147, * Suchthilfe Wien https://suchthilfe.wien [https://suchthilfe.wien/], * Gesundheit Österreich: Suchtberatung directory https://www.gesundheit.gv.at/leben/sucht/suchtberatung [https://www.gesundheit.gv.at/leben/sucht/suchtberatung]; * International SAMHSA National Helpline (US) 1-800-662-HELP https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline [https://www.samhsa.gov/find-help/national-helpline], * FindTreatment.gov [http://findtreatment.gov/] https://findtreatment.gov [https://findtreatment.gov/], * UK FRANK https://www.talktofrank.com [https://www.talktofrank.com/] and NHS services https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/addiction-support [https://www.nhs.uk/live-well/addiction-support], * Canada https://www.canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/substance-use.html [https://www.canada.ca/en/health-canada/services/substance-use.html], * Narcotics Anonymous https://www.na.org [https://www.na.org/], * Alcoholics Anonymous https://www.aa.org [https://www.aa.org/], * SMART Recovery https://www.smartrecovery.org [https://www.smartrecovery.org/]. 🔗 References * American Psychiatric Association (DSM-5 criteria for SUD) * Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) – overdose statistics * Monitoring the Future Study (University of Michigan) * National Institute on Drug Abuse (NIDA) * World Health Organization (WHO) reports on substance use * Volkow, N. et al. (2021–2024). Trends in opioid and stimulant use * Twenge, J. (2017–2023). Generational behavioral research * Patrick, M. E., & Schulenberg, J. (2020). Adolescent substance trends * Johns Hopkins Psychedelic Research Unit publications

44. Toxic Habits

In this episode of Trial & Error & Error, Ale and LJ unpack the toxic habit cycle: the decision to change, the burst of momentum, the inevitable stumble, and the slow slide back to square one. You will hear why willpower is not the real solution, and how behavior change science points to a smarter path. Together, they share three practical tools to help you break autopilot patterns and rebuild habits that actually stick. In this episode: * 🔁 What the toxic habit cycle looks like, and why it keeps repeating * 🧠 Why “just try harder” rarely works, and what to do instead * 🎯 Tool 1: Clarify what you actually want, and make it concrete * 🧩 Tool 2: Find your specific breaking points, and plan for them * 🧘 Tool 3: Use mindfulness to catch habits before they take over * 💬 A chat section to reflect on your “THAT girl” fantasy, relapses, and real-life triggers 🎧 Takeaway: Try smarter, not harder, and treat habit change like a skill you can practice.

43. Should I open my relationship?

In this episode of Trial & Error & Error, LJ and Ale unpack the truth behind open relationships and consensual non-monogamy. From definitions and common relationship styles to what the research says about satisfaction, jealousy, stigma, and mental health, they lay out the potential benefits and real risks so listeners can decide what fits their values. In this episode, we cover: * 💬 What an open relationship is (and what it is not) * 🧩 Different types of consensual non-monogamy: swinging, polyamory, open relationships, and relationship anarchy * 📊 What research says about relationship satisfaction and sexual satisfaction * 🧠 Why jealousy still shows up, and how some couples manage it * ⚠️ Common risks: unequal desire, boundary violations, and communication breakdowns * 🧭 When opening a relationship might help, and when it can backfire * 🛠️ A science-based approach to opening a relationship with clear boundaries and check-ins ✨ Listener takeaway: Open relationships are not a shortcut to fixing problems. They tend to amplify whatever is already present, so success depends on honesty, trust, and ongoing communication. 📚 REFERENCES (ACADEMIC & MEDIA) * Rubel, A. N., & Bogaert, A. F. (2016). Consensual nonmonogamy: Psychological well-being and relationship quality. Journal of Sex Research. * Conley, T. D., et al. (2013). A critical examination of popular assumptions about the benefits and outcomes of monogamous relationships. Personality and Social Psychology Review. * Moors, A. C., et al. (2017). Stigma toward consensual non-monogamy. Journal of Social and Personal Relationships. * Sheff, E. (2014). The Polyamorists Next Door. * Haupert, M. L., et al. (2017). Prevalence of experiences with consensual nonmonogamous relationships. Archives of Sexual Behavior. * Podcast: Multiamory Podcast (relationship science & CNM communication) * Podcast: Esther Perel’s Where Should We Begin? * YouTube: Talks by relationship therapist Esther Perel on modern intimacy