Your Parenting Long Game

Episode 388: 4 Tips to Improve Your Influence When Asking Kids (or Anyone) to Change

11 min · 13 de ago de 2026
Portada del episodio Episode 388: 4 Tips to Improve Your Influence When Asking Kids (or Anyone) to Change

Descripción

Have you ever started a conversation with the goal of guiding your child, only to have them argue, shut down, or become defensive? It's easy to assume you need better words. But often, what matters more is whether the other person feels safe enough to actually hear those words. And that doesn't mean agreeing with them, making them happy, or avoiding things they don't want to hear. In this episode, you'll learn how to increase your influence in any conversation, without trying harder to convince, explain, or get the "right" response. In this episode, you'll hear: • The common thing we do when we really want someone to hear us that can make them even less likely to listen • One subtle shift that can make someone less defensive, even when you still need to address their behavior • Why ending a conversation before it feels finished may give your words more impact -- FREE RESOURCE: Does your child have a narrow zone of tolerance? [https://tally.so/r/Gxrr0L] Get support from Rachel [https://rachel-bailey.com/work-with-rachel]

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320 episodios

Portada del episodio Episode 388: 4 Tips to Improve Your Influence When Asking Kids (or Anyone) to Change

Episode 388: 4 Tips to Improve Your Influence When Asking Kids (or Anyone) to Change

Have you ever started a conversation with the goal of guiding your child, only to have them argue, shut down, or become defensive? It's easy to assume you need better words. But often, what matters more is whether the other person feels safe enough to actually hear those words. And that doesn't mean agreeing with them, making them happy, or avoiding things they don't want to hear. In this episode, you'll learn how to increase your influence in any conversation, without trying harder to convince, explain, or get the "right" response. In this episode, you'll hear: • The common thing we do when we really want someone to hear us that can make them even less likely to listen • One subtle shift that can make someone less defensive, even when you still need to address their behavior • Why ending a conversation before it feels finished may give your words more impact -- FREE RESOURCE: Does your child have a narrow zone of tolerance? [https://tally.so/r/Gxrr0L] Get support from Rachel [https://rachel-bailey.com/work-with-rachel]

13 de ago de 202611 min
Portada del episodio Episode 387: When You Know You Should Calm Down... But You Don't Want To

Episode 387: When You Know You Should Calm Down... But You Don't Want To

Sometimes you know you could look at your child's behavior differently... but you don't want to. You're angry. You're resentful. And part of you feels like letting go of those feelings would mean ignoring something that isn't okay. When that happens, trying to force yourself to calm down or change your thoughts may be skipping something important. In this episode, I'll explain why recurring anger and resentment can be signals and what you may need to understand before those feelings can loosen their grip. In this episode, you'll hear: • Why part of you may resist letting go of anger, even when you know it isn't helping • What your frustration or resentment may be trying to tell you • What to do before trying to change your thoughts so you can respond more calmly, without relying on willpower -- FREE RESOURCE: Does your child have a narrow zone of tolerance? [https://tally.so/r/Gxrr0L] Get support from Rachel [https://rachel-bailey.com/work-with-rachel]

30 de jul de 202610 min
Portada del episodio Episode 386: Stop Validating Your Child's Feelings

Episode 386: Stop Validating Your Child's Feelings

For many of us, validating your child's feelings can lead to a child getting even more upset. Validation isn't necessarily wrong... but for many sensitive children, it isn't what they're actually looking for. I'll explain why "naming emotions" often increases Yuck, and what children really need instead. In this episode, you'll hear: • Why validation can unintentionally make some sensitive children feel more alone • The one word many parents add that completely changes the message they're sending • A simple shift that helps your child feel truly understood so they can process their Yuck more easily -- FREE RESOURCE: Does your child have a narrow zone of tolerance? [https://tally.so/r/Gxrr0L] Talk to Rachel about getting support [https://rachel-bailey.com/work-with-rachel/]

16 de jul de 20269 min
Portada del episodio Episode 385: How to Help Your Child Take Back Control of Their Big Reactions

Episode 385: How to Help Your Child Take Back Control of Their Big Reactions

What if your child's biggest struggle isn't that they have big emotions...but that those emotions keep taking over? When children feel powerless against frustration, disappointment, or anxiety, our instinct is often to teach them coping strategies. Often the missing piece is helping them feel like they're in charge of the process instead. In this episode, you'll hear: • Why many kids reject coping strategies and how we accidentally make that more likely • A simple shift that helps children want to build resilience instead of feeling pressured to change • How to plant seeds that help your child gradually take power back from their "Yuck," even if they're not ready today FREE RESOURCE: Does your child have a narrow zone of tolerance? [https://tally.so/r/Gxrr0L] Get support from Rachel [https://rachel-bailey.com/work-with-rachel]

2 de jul de 202612 min
Portada del episodio Episode 384: When Your Child Is Upset and Other Children (or Tasks) Also Need You

Episode 384: When Your Child Is Upset and Other Children (or Tasks) Also Need You

Parenting can feel like one long tug-of-war between the child who needs you right now, the child who's waiting for you, and the growing list of things that still need to get done. And when everyone's needs seem important, it's easy to feel like no matter what you choose, someone is losing out. The good news is that we can use these moments to help build children's resilience rather a belief that we're not there for them. In this episode, you'll hear: • Why trying to figure out who needs you most in a specific moment isn't the best strategy to use • How we teach children who can't immediately get our attention that they're still important (and capable) • A simple question to ask yourself when multiple children need you at the same time and you can't do everything at once -- FREE WORKSHOP: When Your Child Focuses on the Negative: How to respond without feeding the negativity or making things worse [https://rachel-bailey.com/free-training-negative/] FREE RESOURCE: Does your child have a narrow zone of tolerance? [https://tally.so/r/Gxrr0L] Get support from Rachel [https://rachel-bailey.com/work-with-rachel]

18 de jun de 202615 min