Feeding To Sleep Podcast

The Midnight Scroll: Has Gentle Parenting Gone Too Far?

I recorded this episode a few times before finding what felt right because I didn’t want to just go over all the viral posts like the ones that said things like “gentle parenting is raising brats, gentle parenting has gone too far, we are raising kids who are too soft…” there were more but I think you get the point. I feel like that conversation’s already been done. Instead I’m sharing what those posts brought up in me especially as someone who leaned hard on gentle parenting when I first became a mum. I thought if I just followed all the right scripts, I wouldn’t mess up my kids. But over time, it started to feel rigid. Robotic. Disconnected from what my kids and my nervous system actually needed. In this episode, I talk about: * Why gentle parenting stopped feeling good for me * What I’ve found instead in high nurture parenting * And how shifting away from perfection and into connection has been deeply healing If you’re curious about high nurture, I highly recommend The Nurture Revolution by Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum. I’d love to know what’s your experience with gentle parenting? Does it feel like it’s helping or like something’s missing? This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit feedingtosleep.substack.com [https://feedingtosleep.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

The Midnight Scroll: Is It Giving Tradwife Energy or A Call To Get Creative?

I wanted to talk about this post by @goodnightmoonchild [https://www.instagram.com/goodnightmoonchild] and @earthmilkmoon [https://www.instagram.com/earthmilkmoon] When I sat down to record this the post was sitting around 400 comments and now at the time of posting it’s at over 500. There were a lot of different opinions. Some people loved it. Others said it was giving tradwife and the post was called reductive, unrealistic and bashing mothers who choose to work. But here’s what I saw: I saw a post that called out what a lot of us are thinking but don’t talk about. That if is ok to reevaluate what matters, to take a pause, to slow down, to forgo the extras and be creative about it. A great reminder that you don’t have to justify wanting more presence, more time and more connection with your kids. 👇 Let me know what it brings up for you and if you are-how you are choosing to get creative? Thanks for reading Feeding to Sleep! Subscribe for free to receive new podcast episodes. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit feedingtosleep.substack.com [https://feedingtosleep.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

The Midnight Scroll: When Sleep Training Gets Rebranded as Healing

This week’s episode, I’m responding to a Reel (and the full YouTube video behind it) where a doctor lays out a strict sleep training plan and claims it’s not just about sleep, it’s about healing generational trauma. But here’s what’s actually being advised: * A rigid, clock-based routine: same wake time, same naps, same bedtime every day. * Wake your baby up if they fall asleep in your arms so you can put them down "awake." * Let them cry for 20 to 30 minutes repeatedly. * And if that’s hard for you? That’s your trauma. Not your instincts. And I just… no. In this episode, I talk about why this messaging is not healing, it’s pressure. Why I believe healing doesn’t come from withdrawing love or ignoring a crying baby. And why your discomfort isn’t proof that you’re broken, it’s proof that you care. Receive new posts about biologically normal baby sleep and feeding and consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. Here’s what I dive into in this episode: * Why letting your baby cry isn’t a parenting skill * How maternal instincts are being dismissed as emotional dysfunction * The deeply gendered and outdated history of mainstream sleep training * What the science actually says about how mothers and fathers respond to infant cries * Why healing can look like cuddling, feeding, rocking, and following your baby’s cues * And a personal story about how responsive parenting helped me begin to heal my own childhood wounds Referenced in this episode: Neuroscience of parental response to crying: * Parsons et al., 2016: Mothers show increased activity in emotional regulation and empathy regions in response to baby cries (Social Neuroscience). * Abraham et al., 2014: Mothers’ and fathers’ brains activate differently, mothers with emotional regulation, fathers more with logic and problem-solving (PNAS). Historical context: * Dr. Emmett Holt (1894) and Dr. Richard Ferber (1980s) popularized rigid, non-responsive sleep training methods. Both men. Neither developed these ideas from hands-on caregiving. Closing quote from:The Nurture Revolution by Dr. Greer Kirshenbaum “In order to build a brain that is resilient, healthy, and able to withstand adversity later in life, babies need brain-nurturing experiences while they are developing.” If you’ve ever felt like your instincts were the problem… they’re not. Responding to your baby is not weak.Wanting to hold them, comfort them, or keep them close is not trauma. It’s connection. It’s caregiving. It’s the work of real healing. With love + support,Jess Feeding to Sleep P.S. Have you seen this kind of messaging online lately? Did it make you feel confused, frustrated, or even a little judged? You’re not alone. I’d love to hear your thoughts—drop them in the comments or reply to this email. This post is not medical advice. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit feedingtosleep.substack.com [https://feedingtosleep.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

The Midnight Scroll: Separating Feeding and Sleeping Doesn’t Make Sense

This week’s episode is about a post that I came across that says “separating feeding and sleeping is an important ingredient in infant sleep.” And while the post does mention that it might not apply to newborns, the overall message still pushes the idea that: “if your baby is eating, they should be awake. If they’re sleeping, they shouldn’t be eating.” Except… that’s just not how babies work. Receive new posts about biologically normal baby sleep and feeding and consider becoming a free or paid subscriber. Feeding and sleeping have always been closely linked for babies. It’s built into their biology, their brains, and our bodies. Suckling helps babies settle. Night feeds support your milk supply. And yes babies of all ages can and do feed or comfort nurse while drifting in and out of sleep. That’s not something that needs to be “fixed.” Trying to separate the two too early can cause so much unnecessary stress. It often leads parents to feel like they’re doing something wrong for letting their baby fall asleep while nursing, or for using the breast as a tool to soothe, when in reality, that’s one of the most natural and time-tested ways to help a baby sleep. In this episode, I talk through what I saw, why it frustrated me, and what I want you to know if you’ve come across advice like this that left you second-guessing yourself. You’re not spoiling your baby. You’re not missing some secret method. You’re just parenting a real baby in the real world and you’re not doing it wrong if your baby still needs to feed at night. With love + support,Jess Feeding to Sleep P.S. Have you seen this kind of messaging online lately? Did it make you feel confused, frustrated, or even a little judged? You’re not alone. I’d love to hear your thoughts—drop them in the comments or reply to this email. This post is not medical advice. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit feedingtosleep.substack.com [https://feedingtosleep.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]

Sacred Sleep: A Course That Supported Me When My Baby’s Sleep Felt Hard

I’ve never taken a course to support myself with baby sleep, only courses to help me support other mothers with their baby’s sleep. But I’d been having a bit of a hard time with my baby’s sleep, so I decided it was time to try some support for myself. When I saw this course was being offered by Brittany, I had to sign up. I’ve been following her work since 2023, and she’s one of the few people supporting mothers with biologically normal baby sleep who truly inspired me to do the same. I signed up for Sacred Sleep [https://www.goodnightmoonchild.com/sacredsleep], a 9-week program created by Brittany Chambers of @goodnightmoonchild [https://www.instagram.com/goodnightmoonchild] and honestly, I’m so happy I did. I wanted to share my raw, unedited reflection on what it was like to be in a space made for mothers like me- navigating sleep with responsiveness, contact naps, bedsharing, and all the things that don’t fit the “mainstream”. This wasn’t a fix-it-all program.It [http://program.It] was support.Reassurance.Nervous system education.Community [http://education.Community]. And a space that helped me feel a little more grounded through a really tired season. I found so much value in this course. I know the basics of baby sleep, I support other parents with it, and I still needed that reminder, that education, and that community for me. If you’ve been thinking about investing in support but you’re not sure if it’s “worth it”, I get it. But the right kind of support doesn’t try to fix your baby. It helps you feel more confident, more grounded and more understood. And that can change everything. If you’re curious about what it’s like, I share it all in this episode. You can listen to it here and if Sacred Sleep sounds like something that might support you too, here’s the link to check it out: It’s an affiliate link but I only share things I’ve personally tried and truly found helpful. I hope this episode helps you feel more confident about accessing support when you need it. You’re doing such important work. With love + support,Jess P.S. If you’re in a hard sleep season right now, you’re not doing it wrong and there is support out there that aligns with what you value as a mother and parent. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit feedingtosleep.substack.com [https://feedingtosleep.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_1]