Split Resilience: Putting Kids in the Middle of Divorce

Gray Divorce and the Grown Kids Left in the Middle

Think adult kids are immune to divorce? Think again. In this episode, researcher Joleen Greenwood unpacks the hidden impact of gray divorce on adult children and what helps families move through it with more honesty, boundaries, and care.

Invest a Day in the Life of Your Child: The Science Behind the New Beginnings Program

In this conversation, I sit down with Dr. Irwin Sandler, co-creator of the New Beginnings Program: a decades-long, research-backed intervention proven to strengthen parenting, reduce conflict, and support children’s mental health after divorce. Irwin and I walk through how the program began, what the early randomized trials revealed, and why the six- and fifteen-year results still feel astonishing today. He shares simple, powerful parenting practices, like catching your child “doing good” and building consistent routines, and explains in plain language why consistency matters so much for a child’s developing brain. We also discuss how the team translated the entire curriculum into an online experience accessible to parents anywhere, without losing the heart or effectiveness of the original program. If you’re navigating separation or supporting families, this episode offers clarity, warmth, and practical hope that change is possible for both parents and kids. Find out more at www.splitresilience.com or www.divorceandparenting.com

It’s Not Your Fault: Healing After Divorce

What happens when you take one of childhood’s most invisible wounds, growing up through your parents’ divorce, and turn it into purpose? In this powerful episode, I sit down with Joey Pontarelli, founder of Restored and author of It’s Not Your Fault, to unpack the emotional, spiritual, and practical realities of life after family breakdown. Joey shares his own story of pain, healing, and redemption, from feeling abandoned and ashamed as an 11-year-old to building a global movement that helps teens and young adults from divorced or dysfunctional families find hope and healing. We talk about: * Why so many kids secretly blame themselves for their parents’ divorce * How to stop the cycle of dysfunction from repeating * The role of faith, community, and meaning in rebuilding your life * What parents can do right now to support their children through separation This episode is a must-listen for anyone navigating divorce, as a parent, a child, or someone still healing from the ripple effects of family breakdown. Learn more about Joey’s work at restoredministry.com [https://restoredministry.com] and follow Split Resilience for more conversations that turn pain into power.

When Community Shows Up: SAFE Alliance & Touch-a-Truck

In this episode of Split Resilience, host Tammy Sutherns sits down with Laramie Gorbett of SAFE Alliance to talk about hope, healing, and community. Laramie shares her journey of working with survivors of gender-based violence and explains how SAFE Alliance has been a lifeline for families in Austin for over 50 years. They also dive into Touch-a-Truck, SAFE’s signature family event where kids get to climb into fire trucks, bulldozers, and even school buses, all while raising critical funds to keep families safe. Together, Tammy and Laramie explore why events like this matter, how they build awareness in unexpected ways, and what resilience really looks like when a community comes together. Buy a ticket for Touch-A-Truck in Austin on September 27th here [https://give.safeaustin.org/campaign/touch-a-truck-24-25/c559103]. Visit  safeaustin.org. [http://safeaustin.org/]

Beyond the Breakup: Raising Resilient Kids When Love Gets Complicated

In this deeply honest and insightful episode of Split Resilience, I sit down with Steven Spears, a family therapist with both personal and professional experience navigating divorce and childhood trauma. Together, we explore what children really need during separation, how to protect them from high-conflict dynamics, and why resilience isn’t about being “tough”—it’s about feeling safe and seen. Steven shares his own childhood story, explains why courts sometimes miss the mark, and offers tangible, compassionate advice for parents doing their best in tough circumstances. Whether you’re in the thick of a co-parenting storm or just lying awake wondering if your kid will be okay, this one’s for you. Takeaways: * Divorce is a journey with ongoing ripple effects. * Children are resilient, but they need support. * Parental conflict can deeply affect children. * It's crucial to foster connection with children during tough times. * Repairing relationships after conflict is essential for family health. * Safe spaces at home are vital for children's emotional well-being. * Hypervigilance in children can stem from parental conflict. * Navigating court issues can be challenging for families. * Stigma around divorce can impact both parents and children. * Parents must prioritize their own emotional health to support their children. Find Steven at: https://counselingbysteven.com/ [https://counselingbysteven.com/]