That's Where I'm At

EP 66: Consciously Awake: Lisa's Journey Out of Toxic Love

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura interviews Lisa Hawkins — a Dating & Relationship Coach who empowers men and women to thrive in their relationships. With over 30 years of experience, Lisa has dedicated her life to understanding the intricacies of human connection and what truly makes relationships flourish. Her personal journey, marked by challenges, growth, and deep spiritual awareness, has given her a profound understanding of the obstacles individuals face in their search for love, healing, and self-discovery. Lisa shares her story of overcoming generational trauma, abuse, and the difficult process of recovering after an abusive marriage. The conversation explores the struggle of recognizing and trusting your instincts, the impact of societal conditioning, and the non-linear nature of healing. Lisa also offers practical guidance on self-awareness, journaling, and cultivating self-love. Together, she and Laura highlight the importance of compassion, patience, and honoring your unique path. Listeners are encouraged to embrace their own journeys and seek support as they reclaim their lives. Key Topics & Timestamps Lisa's Background and Unconscious Family Conditioning (00:02:33) Lisa shares her upbringing in a toxic, unconscious family and how it led to abusive relationships. Experiences of Oppression and Lack of Boundaries (00:03:42) Lisa describes being raised to be agreeable, lacking boundaries, and early experiences of abuse. Immediate Regret After Marriage (00:06:52) Lisa recalls knowing she made a mistake hours after marrying, but feeling trapped by religion. Life in an Abusive Marriage (00:07:32) Lisa details her ten-year marriage, cycles of leaving and returning, and escalation of abuse. Barriers to Leaving Abusive Relationships (00:09:09) Lisa and Laura discuss why leaving abuse is complex, including privilege and safety concerns. The Long Healing Journey (00:14:12) Lisa shares that her healing has spanned 30 years, involving unraveling trauma and conditioning. Visible Healing and Personal Growth (00:16:15) Laura and Lisa reflect on how healing manifests outwardly and the unseen hard work behind it. Reacting vs. Responding and the Limits of Clichés (00:19:10) Discussion on the difference between reacting and responding, and why healing isn't as simple as memes suggest. Being vs. Doing in Healing (00:23:23) Lisa emphasizes the importance of being present and authentic in the healing process. Journaling and Pattern Recognition (00:26:04) Lisa recommends journaling to track feelings and patterns, aiding in rebuilding self-trust. Lisa's Podcast and Coaching Work (00:28:54) Lisa introduces her podcast "Conscious Insights" and describes her coaching clientele. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Lisa, 'That was the pivoting point in my life where I hit absolute bottom. There was absolutely nothing left of me.'Lisa, 'Some part of me, the fighter in me, came up and said, I'm not going to let this define me, and I will overcome it.'Lisa, 'Sometimes the emotions are more than what our bodies and brain and nervous system can take, and we become numb because that's the only way we can survive.'Lisa, 'There was a lot of conditioning that I wasn't aware of when I started the journey that was given to me from generations that I've had to unravel.'Lisa, 'There are times when I'm still learning to trust my gut, and I've been doing this for a long time.' RESOURCES: * COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura] * YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE [http://laurarichpodcast.gumroad.com/l/notcrazyebook] * MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE [https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards] * JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 [https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517] Connect with Lisa * www.consciouslyawakecounseling.com [http://www.consciouslyawakecounseling.com/] * https://consciouslyawakecounseling.com/about-me/ [https://consciouslyawakecounseling.com/about-me/] * Lisa Hawkins Dating & Relationship Coach - https://www.facebook.com/ConsciouslyAwakeCoun [https://www.facebook.com/ConsciouslyAwakeCoun] * Consciously Awake Counseling https://www.instagram.com/consciouslyawakecounseling/ [https://www.instagram.com/consciouslyawakecounseling/] * Amazon KDP Ebook The Awakening by Lisa Hawkins : https://a.co/d/cQAua5o [https://a.co/d/cQAua5o] * Conscious Insights Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/4YZ3Dl30yDsNfMuHBvtkgK?si=db73a25f188b4a6b [https://open.spotify.com/show/4YZ3Dl30yDsNfMuHBvtkgK?si=db73a25f188b4a6b] "Healing begins the moment you stop ignoring your instincts and start trusting your truth." Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com [https://resilientvoicemedia.com/] Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

EP 65: Beth's Cinderella Story: A Journey of Healing, Courage, and God-Given Purpose

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura welcomes Beth M. Jones—an International Speaker, Author of 30 books, and podcaster. Beth is the wife of fire chief Ray, mom to three beautiful daughters (Heather, Eden, and Leah), and has two adorable cats. She helps women step out of fear into faith by sharing her story and the freedom we have in Jesus. Beth believes we should dream big because we serve a big God! Beth shares her powerful journey from childhood abuse and toxic relationships to healing and faith. She discusses overcoming trauma, recognizing red flags in abusive relationships, and the importance of self-worth and support. Drawing on her own experiences and faith in Jesus, Beth encourages women to step out of fear and embrace their unique purpose. The episode offers hope, practical insights, and resources for women seeking freedom and transformation. Key Topics & Timestamps Beth's Motivation to Help Women (00:02:47) Beth explains how her childhood experiences inspired her to help women step out of fear into faith. Cinderella as a Metaphor for Unique Purpose (00:04:02) Beth discusses her connection to Cinderella, relating it to abuse and dreaming big. Beth's Childhood Abuse and Early Escape (00:05:03) Beth shares her experiences of childhood abuse and her desire to leave home as a teenager. Short-Lived First Marriage and Divorce (00:08:08) Beth talks about her brief first marriage, the birth of her daughter, and eventual separation. Post-Divorce Partying and Delayed Healing (00:11:13) Beth admits to partying and not focusing on self-improvement until much later in life. Journalism Career and Second Marriage (00:12:28) Beth describes her journalism internship, meeting her second husband, and his initial charm. Escalating Abuse and Financial Dependence (00:22:07) Beth describes the onset of her husband's temper, walking on eggshells, and feeling trapped financially. Physical Abuse Toward Beth's Daughter (00:28:26) Beth recounts her husband's violence toward her daughter, a medical emergency, and moving to escape. Trauma Bonding and Self-Doubt (00:35:06) Beth and Laura discuss trauma bonding, self-esteem issues, and the difficulty of breaking free from abuse. Beginning the Healing Journey (00:36:41) Beth starts counseling after her husband leaves, experiences panic attacks, and begins healing with her daughter. Therapy, Journaling, and Recovery (00:38:04) Beth describes the impact of therapy, journaling, and addressing compounded childhood trauma. Overcoming Fear and Embracing Public Speaking (00:41:04) Beth shares her initial fear of public speaking and how she learned to "do it afraid." Travel, Growth, and Encouraging Others (00:42:54) Beth discusses international speaking, personal growth, and encouraging others to pursue their dreams. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Beth, 'It stems from my own life experiences, things I went through in childhood, and I just have a passion for women to dream big and be all that God created them to be.' Beth, 'I can't say the marriage was a mistake because out of that marriage came my beautiful, precious daughter, Heather.' Beth, 'I think I always was looking for that love, that unconditional love that we want from someone.' Beth, 'I would try to please him and there wasn't pleasing him. I just felt that tension around him and I began to notice that temper.' Beth, 'Because of my childhood abuse, I didn't have the confidence in myself and value myself enough to know this is not good. This is not right. I should not be with this man.' Beth, 'I started going once a week, and I began to deal with all the pain and the trauma in my life, and it really helped me just to talk it out with a trusted person.' Beth, 'We do it afraid, just like you said. We do it afraid out of obedience to God, but just to give people hope and encourage others.' RESOURCES: * RESOURCES: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/resources [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/resources] * COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura] * SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse] * YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE [http://laurarichpodcast.gumroad.com/l/notcrazyebook] * MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE [https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards] Connect with Beth * https://www.BethJones.net [https://www.bethjones.net/] * Amazon Author Page: https://www.amazon.com/author/bethmjones [https://www.amazon.com/author/bethmjones] * Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/BethJones.net [https://www.facebook.com/BethJones.net/] * Podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/bethmjones [https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/bethmjones] * YouTube Channel (videos & vlogs): https://www.youtube.com/@bethmjones [https://www.youtube.com/@bethmjones] * Etsy Shop: https://www.etsy.com/shop/Shineyourlightindark [https://www.etsy.com/shop/Shineyourlightindark] "Bravery isn't loud—sometimes it's just choosing yourself." Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com [https://resilientvoicemedia.com/] Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

EP 64: Gray Rock & Glow Up with Julie Danielson: Rebuilding Life After a Toxic Marriage

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura welcomes Julie Danielson—Life Coach, author, host of the "Get Over Divorce" podcast, and creator of the "Get Over Divorce Collective," a coaching program that helps women heal powerfully and create a life they love after divorce. Julie discusses healing after divorce, especially from narcissistic relationships, sharing her personal journey and the challenges of co-parenting with a toxic ex. She offers practical strategies like setting boundaries and using the Gray Rock Method. Together, they emphasize the importance of self-care, supportive communities, and rediscovering joy after trauma. Listeners are encouraged to reclaim their self-worth, embrace new experiences, and connect with resources for ongoing support and empowerment. Key Topics & Timestamps Julie's Divorce Story (00:02:18) Julie shares her background, early marriage, and the personal journey leading to her divorce. Personal Growth After Divorce (00:06:33) Julie discusses her self-improvement, career growth, and the decision to end her marriage. Co-Parenting and Divorce Logistics (00:07:57) Julie explains the divorce process, co-parenting arrangements, and how clear agreements helped. Empowered Dating and Self-Worth (00:11:32) Laura and Julie reflect on dating with self-worth, authenticity, and not shape-shifting for others. How Julie Became a Divorce Coach (00:13:25) Julie describes her journey into coaching, the importance of authentic connections, and building her program. Julie's Second Marriage and Continued Growth (00:15:44) Julie shares meeting her current husband, the growth within a healthy relationship, and career transitions. Building a Coaching Business (00:17:39) Julie talks about starting her coaching business, focusing on helping women through divorce. Narcissistic Abuse vs. "Regular" Divorce (00:18:51) Discussion on the differences between divorcing a narcissist and a typical divorce, and the prevalence of narcissistic abuse. Losing Friends and Outgrowing Social Circles (00:26:31) They discuss how healing and setting boundaries can lead to losing friends who thrived on drama. Neuroplasticity and Healing the Brain (00:35:25) Discussion on how trying new things helps heal the brain after abuse and builds new neural pathways. Advice for Women Newly Divorced (00:37:11) Julie shares the "gray rock" method for dealing with toxic or narcissistic exes and minimizing emotional responses. Turning the Tables on the Narcissist (00:40:09) How gray rocking annoys narcissists and helps reclaim personal power. Handling Provocations and Staying Factual (00:41:42) Advice on not justifying or explaining yourself, sticking to facts, and not reacting to provocations. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Julie, 'As you grow and change, you are reaching new levels.' Julie, 'You don't need that drama in your life. Drama is life-sucking, and drama is what the narcissist surrounds himself with.' Julie, 'Your brain just expanded and you created a new neurotransmitter that says, "Oh, I can do this."' Laura, 'I'm good. And I do not ever have to acknowledge it because I've done too much work. I'm worth more than that. And so I will gray rock my life away.' RESOURCES: * COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura] * SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse] * YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE [http://laurarichpodcast.gumroad.com/l/notcrazyebook] * MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE [https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards] * JOIN THE HEALING GROUP: https://www.patreon.com/c/thatswhereimatpodcast [https://www.patreon.com/c/thatswhereimatpodcast] CONNECT WITH JULIE: * Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/juliedanielson.CHAT [https://www.facebook.com/juliedanielson.CHAT] * Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliedanielson_coaching/ [https://www.instagram.com/juliedanielson_coaching/] * TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@getoverdivorcecoach [https://www.tiktok.com/@getoverdivorcecoach] * Book a free Divorce Breakthrough Session with me, I will help you uncover some blocks and blind spots so you can breakthrough to your next level of healing faster. https://www.getoverdivorce.com/schedule [https://www.getoverdivorce.com/schedule] * Laura on Julie's podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/144-husbands-behind-a-mask/id1511048997?i=1000659284917 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/144-husbands-behind-a-mask/id1511048997?i=1000659284917] * The Gray Rock Method https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method [https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method] "Boundaries aren't walls—they're bridges back to yourself." Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com [https://resilientvoicemedia.com/] Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

EP 63: Your Money, Your Voice: How to Reclaim Control After Divorce with Rhonda Noordyk

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura talks with Rhonda, a financial coach and advocate for women navigating divorce. Once someone who avoided conflict, Rhonda transformed her communication skills through therapy and education, turning her personal challenges into a mission to help other women find their voice and financial confidence. With over 17,000 hours of experience, 565 clients served, and $20 million secured for women, Rhonda brings both expertise and empathy to her work. A former financial advisor, she recognized that women facing divorce need more than advice—they need strategic and emotional support to rebuild their lives. Laura and Rhonda explore the realities of financial abuse, lack of access to information, and the emotional toll of divorce. Rhonda also shares her CIA framework—Communication, Integrity, and Advocacy—to help women make informed decisions and achieve lasting financial independence. Key Topics & Timestamps Transition to Financial Industry (00:05:20) Rhonda discusses entering the financial industry and encountering both support and dysfunction. Founding Women's Financial Wellness Center (00:06:40) Rhonda explains why she started her business and her holistic approach to financial coaching. Challenging Gender Stereotypes in Finance (00:11:29) Laura and Rhonda discuss outdated views about women and money, and the importance of empowerment. Strategies for Uncovering Hidden Assets (00:15:11) Rhonda shares investigative strategies for finding hidden assets and the importance of asking the right questions. Manipulation in Divorce Settlements (00:20:50) Laura and Rhonda discuss manipulation, gaslighting, and the importance of advocating for fair settlements. Real-Life Impact of Divorce on Lifestyle (00:24:19) Rhonda explains the 41% decrease in lifestyle post-divorce and how to plan for financial changes. Encouraging Proactive Financial Conversations (00:30:29) Advice for women to start asking questions, taking inventory, and reviewing financial documents. Respect and Integrity in Financial Services (00:36:33) Laura and Rhonda discuss the need for respect, integrity, and clear communication from financial professionals. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Rhonda, 'If I can help one woman improve her relationship with money, I've empowered her for a lifetime.' Rhonda, 'We just have to crunch the numbers and see where stuff lands and give women a voice to be able to advocate for what they need.' Rhonda, 'Don't just sign. That's probably my biggest advice. Don't just sign.' Rhonda, 'You don't have to know everything. You just have to be willing to ask questions unapologetically.' Rhonda, 'You create that safety, you create that trust, you know that somebody has your best interests at heart.' RESOURCES: * COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura] * SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse] * YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE [http://laurarichpodcast.gumroad.com/l/notcrazyebook] * MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE [https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards] * FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com [http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/] Connect with Rhonda * WEBSITE: https://wfwcdivorce.com/ [https://wfwcdivorce.com/] * Get immediate access to my FREE mini course. https://api.leadconnectorhq.com/widget/form/S4a9NYjourlEQa70zVme [https://api.leadconnectorhq.com/widget/form/S4a9NYjourlEQa70zVme] "Financial freedom begins the moment you find your voice." Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com [https://resilientvoicemedia.com/] Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

EP 62: Rebuilding After Divorce — Finding Yourself Again with Heidi Bee

In this empowering episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura sits down with Heidi Bee, the Divorce Comeback Coach, to explore the emotional journey of rebuilding life after divorce. Heidi Bee is a certified and trauma-informed divorce coach and somatic breathwork facilitator. Through her 3-month Comeback Course & Coaching Community, she helps women navigate their "new normal" by providing the roadmap, resources, and relationships needed to move forward with confidence. She's also the host of the Divorce Comeback Coach podcast, where she shares truth-telling conversations and practical guidance to help women take their next best step toward the life they deserve and desire. In this heartfelt conversation, Laura and Heidi open up about: * The feelings of isolation, grief, and identity loss that often follow divorce — especially after long-term or toxic relationships. * The importance of self-care, setting healthy boundaries, and rebuilding community during recovery. * How embracing vulnerability and self-compassion can lead to powerful transformation and growth. Together, they remind listeners that while the road to healing may be difficult, it is also filled with opportunities for renewal, empowerment, and rediscovery of one's true self. Key Topics & Timestamps Heidi's Divorce Story and the "Divorce Ditch" (00:03:06) Heidi shares her personal experience of feeling lost and stuck after divorce, describing it as the "divorce ditch." Coping Mechanisms and Avoidance (00:06:41) Heidi describes unhealthy coping mechanisms she used to avoid pain, such as overworking and numbing behaviors. Shame, Stigma, and the Need for Conversation (00:08:28) Exploring the shame and societal stigma around divorce, and the importance of open conversations. Coaching, Dreaming, and Finding Your Voice (00:17:28) Laura and Heidi discuss the role of coaching in helping women dream again and reclaim their voices. Relationship with Uncertainty and Healing (00:25:45) Learning to manage uncertainty, calm the nervous system, and develop new tools for emotional regulation. Attracting Healthy Relationships Through Self-Love (00:31:37) Heidi shares how self-love and authenticity attract healthier relationships, both romantic and platonic. Protecting Emotional Energy and Reclaiming Space (00:40:48) Heidi emphasizes protecting your emotional landscape and reclaiming energy from unhealthy attachments. Making a "Shit List" and Tracking Emotional Impact (00:44:52) Using a list to remember the negative impacts of an ex and tracking emotional responses to avoid repeating pain. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Heidi, 'I didn't want to admit I was depressed, but I was grieving and resisting it.' Heidi, 'I woke up one day thinking, I don't even know who I am anymore.' Laura, 'You deserve to trust your gut again. Spoiler alert: you were never the problem.' Laura, 'I started my podcast and realized no one ever let me talk.' Heidi, 'Recovery is self-discovery, and I forgot to continue to decide who I was going to be.' Heidi, 'It's more about trusting yourself, trusting that no matter what happens, you can handle it.' Heidi, 'I want people to know you don't have to be afraid of not knowing who you are. All that is, is uncertainty.' Heidi, 'The more I let go of things that no longer serve me, the more I have space to receive what is.' RESOURCES: * COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura] * SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse [https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse] * YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE [http://laurarichpodcast.gumroad.com/l/notcrazyebook] * MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE [https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards] * FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com [http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/] Connect with Heidi * WEBSITE: https://divorcecomebackcoach.com/ [https://divorcecomebackcoach.com/] * INSTAGRAM: @DivorceComebackCoach [https://www.instagram.com/divorcecomebackcoach/] * TIK TOK: @DivorceComebackCoach [https://www.tiktok.com/@divorcecomebackcoach?is_from_webapp=1&sender_device=pc] * Freebies & More: https://linktr.ee/DivorceComebackCoach [https://linktr.ee/DivorceComebackCoach] * Divorce Comeback Coach Podcast - Spotify [https://open.spotify.com/show/4jLp05yjoQNYPDhRtMyyI1?si=7839ca2c923c4a8e] / Apple [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/divorce-comeback-coach/id1486352885?ign-itscg=30200&ign-itsct=lt_p] "The more you let go of what's gone, the more space you create for what's meant for you." Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com [https://resilientvoicemedia.com/] Contact us for expert podcast production and support.