The Angry Therapist Podcast

Therapy Thursdays: Are You Ready to Date Again?

Why is it so hard to let go of someone you know isn't right for you? How do you know when you've healed enough to date again? Can someone truly love you if you don't love themselves? And what do you do when trust is broken? In this listener Q&A, I answer questions about heartbreak, attachment, self-worth, trust, and what it actually takes to build healthy relationships. We explore why we can stay emotionally attached to an ex even when we know the relationship wasn't right, how toxic relationships can shape our dating patterns, and the difference between seeking connection and avoiding loneliness. I also share my thoughts on love languages, masculinity, rebuilding trust after betrayal, and one small step you can take today to begin changing your life. Whether you're trying to move on, wondering if you're ready to date again, or looking to build healthier relationships, I hope this conversation gives you something to reflect on. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 My latest book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://acesse.one/bioe5v7 [https://acesse.one/bioe5v7] John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co [https://www.soulprintmedia.co] 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ [https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist] If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE [https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/] Order John’s book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898] Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/?hl=en] Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.theangrytherapist.com/] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices [https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices]

You Deserve Better: Why Letting Go Creates Space for More

In this personal episode, John shares a collection of journal entries and reflections on fear, identity, reinvention, love, writing, and what it means to fully live. From losing his home in the Los Angeles fire to building a new life in Costa Rica, he explores the fear of reaching the end of life without ever being fully known or fully becoming who you're meant to be. In this episode: • Why fear isn't always a warning and can sometimes be a compass • The danger of protecting a life you've already outgrown • What the Los Angeles fire taught John about identity and change • How love can evolve from a drug into medicine • Lessons from writing seven books and starting a publishing company • A surfing experience that changed the way he thinks about deserving success 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 [https://a.co/d/031PzkW4] John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co [https://www.soulprintmedia.co] 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ [https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist] If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE [https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/] Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898] Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/?hl=en] Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.theangrytherapist.com/] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices [https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices]

The New Masculinity: Discipline, Intimacy, and Emotional Strength with Brenden Durell

In this episode, John Kim sits down with Brenden Durell to talk about masculinity, vulnerability, Tantra, intimacy, and emotional growth. Brenden shares his journey from sports into self-discovery and men’s work, exploring how discipline, trust, and presence can create deeper freedom and connection. They also discuss porn, edging, aftercare, therapeutic experiences with MDMA and San Pedro, and the responsibility men have in creating emotional safety in relationships. In this episode: • Redefining modern masculinity • Why vulnerability matters for men • Tantra, discipline, and personal freedom • Porn, edging, and sexual health • Trust, intimacy, and aftercare • Creating safety in relationships • Emotional intelligence and men’s work Connect with Brenden Durell Website: https://stan.store/brendendurell [https://stan.store/brendendurell] Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/brendendurell/ [https://www.instagram.com/brendendurell/] 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 [https://a.co/d/031PzkW4] John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co [https://www.soulprintmedia.co] 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ [https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist] If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE [https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/] Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898] Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/?hl=en] Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.theangrytherapist.com/] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices [https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices]

Re-release: How to Build Relationship Armor

Don’t protect your heart. Protect your relationship. In this episode, John Kim explores what it really takes to build a relationship that lasts. After heartbreak, loss, and repeating old patterns, many people start doing the inner work and realize that healthy love does not just happen naturally. It has to be built with intention, ownership, and practice. John breaks down the idea of “relationship armor” as the tools and practices that protect the relationship itself. This includes creating a safe space, practicing self-awareness, communicating honestly, loving without dragging the past into the present, and learning how to fight in a healthier way. He also explains why being right can become poison in a relationship, why curiosity creates safety, and why presence, gratitude, space, and having your own life are essential parts of healthy love. In this episode: • Why healthy relationships are built, not found • How to create a safe space in love • The importance of self-awareness and ownership • Why communication builds trust and closeness • How to love without letting your past run the relationship • Why how you fight matters more than how often you fight • How giving up the need to be right creates safety • The role of mindfulness, gratitude, and space in lasting love • Why you need your own life inside a healthy relationship More about John: 📘Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 [https://a.co/d/031PzkW4] John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co [https://www.soulprintmedia.co] 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist [https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist] If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available here. https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/ [https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/] 📘 John’s latest book: https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898 📸 Follow John on Instagram: https://instagram.com/theangrytherapist 🌐 Find out more about John Kim: https://www.theangrytherapist.com/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices [https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices]

Why Breakups Hurt So Much: Attachment, Grief, and Healing

Why does a breakup feel like more than heartbreak? In this episode, John Kim explores why breakups can feel like a death, and why that experience is rooted in more than emotion alone. Drawing from neuroscience, attachment theory, and years of therapeutic experience, he explains what happens in the brain after a relationship ends and why healing takes time. John unpacks the hidden losses that often come with heartbreak, from the future we imagined to the identity we built inside a relationship. He also shares why recovery isn't about forgetting someone, but learning to create a new reality without them. In this episode: • Why breakups feel physically painful • The role dopamine and attachment play in heartbreak • How relationships become part of our emotional regulation system • The grief of losing a future that never actually happened • Identity loss after a breakup • Why healing is really about rewiring If someone in your life is going through a breakup, share this episode with them. Follow the podcast for more conversations on relationships, healing, and personal growth. 🎙️ More about John: 📘 Pre order my new book, Love Hard On Purpose. Toss the blueprints. Build something honest. https://a.co/d/031PzkW4 [https://a.co/d/031PzkW4] John’s book publishing company: Soulprint https://www.soulprintmedia.co [https://www.soulprintmedia.co] 📘 Read John’s book in progress Sh*t Your Therapist Would Never Tell You on John’s SubStack ⁠HERE⁠ [https://substack.com/@theangrytherapist] If you’re ready for deeper work, the Secure Self course is available HERE [https://theangrytherapist.thrivecart.com/secure-self-bundle/] Order John's new book, Break Up. On Purpose,⁠⁠ ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.harpercollins.com/products/break-up-on-purpose-john-kim?variant=42305553956898] Follow John on Instagram⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.instagram.com/theangrytherapist/?hl=en] Find out more about John⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ HERE⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ [https://www.theangrytherapist.com/] Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices [https://podcastchoices.com/adchoices]