The Balanced Athlete Car Convos; About Purpose, Balance and Play!

What is Ikigai with Nicholas Kemp - Part 2

Today’s guest is Nicholas Kemp An author, podcaster, coach and lifelong student of ikigai who’s challenging one of the most common misunderstandings of the concept. Nick’s work exists to gently—but clearly—push back on the idea that Ikigai is a neat intersection of what you love, what you’re good at, what you can get paid for and what the world needs. That framework may be familiar in Western culture, but it isn’t the heart of Ikigai. For Nick, ikigai is something far more personal, lived and human. It isn’t dependent on a career, productivity or monetizing passion—though it can include those things. At its core, Ikigai is about what gives life meaning now: the small moments, the daily practices, the relationships, the movement, the struggle, the joy and the quiet reasons we choose to keep going. In this conversation, Nick shares his own journey into ikigai—how curiosity, challenge and lived experience led him to explore purpose beyond achievement, and why simplifying ikigai into a formula can actually move us further away from it. This episode is an invitation to step away from chasing purpose and instead listen more closely to the life you’re already living. LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicholas-kemp-author/] Ikigai Tribe [https://ikigaitribe.com/tokyo-ikigai-workshop/] A Year of Ikigai [https://geni.us/yearofikigai]

What is Ikigai with Nicholas Kemp - Part 1

This is part one of a two-part episode. Today’s guest is Nicholas Kemp—an author, podcaster, coach and lifelong student of ikigai who’s challenging one of the most common misunderstandings of the concept. Nick’s work exists to gently—but clearly—push back on the idea that Ikigai is a neat intersection of what you love, what you’re good at, what you can get paid for and what the world needs. That framework may be familiar in Western culture, but it isn’t the heart of Ikigai. For Nick, ikigai is something far more personal, lived and human. It isn’t dependent on a career, productivity or monetizing passion—though it can include those things. At its core, Ikigai is about what gives life meaning now: the small moments, the daily practices, the relationships, the movement, the struggle, the joy and the quiet reasons we choose to keep going. In this conversation, Nick shares his own journey into ikigai—how curiosity, challenge and lived experience led him to explore purpose beyond achievement, and why simplifying ikigai into a formula can actually move us further away from it. This episode is an invitation to step away from chasing purpose and instead listen more closely to the life you’re already living. LinkedIn [https://www.linkedin.com/in/nicholas-kemp-author/] Ikigai Tribe [https://ikigaitribe.com/tokyo-ikigai-workshop/] A Year of Ikigai [https://geni.us/yearofikigai]

Setting the Summer Tempo - The Season Between Seasons

The Season Between Seasons: What This Year Taught Us & How to Prep for What’s Next: We’re closing out another year of school and club ball, and before we rush into tryouts, swim team, and summer schedules, I want to pause with you. What did this year really teach your athlete — and how do we help them carry the right things forward?   This episode is the bridge between reflection and preparation — a grounded, encouraging conversation about the transition from the end of school + club season into the summer window of tryouts, swim team, and gearing up for next school year.    The “In‑Between” Season This is the season – the space between- where athletes recharge and burnout prevention kicks in.   * School is wrapping up. * Club ball is winding down. * Swim team is starting. * Tryouts are on the horizon. * Everyone feels the mix of excitement, fatigue and pressure. Lessons Learned from This Year (Club + School Ball, School Swim Team) * What surprised me this year – * The amount of energy parents and athletes give to the drama. The gossip, the pressuring noise that goes on behind the scenes from parents and the coaches and the athletes. The lengths that some parents will go to, to make sure their kids get play time. * The environment that coaches have to put up with, not necessarily from their athletes but from the parents of their athletes. * I was impressed how deliberate my kid was during competition. What sometimes appeared to be just a kid out on the court playing the game, has been her taking in the information, learning and developing a court IQ that was more in depth than I was giving her credit for until we started talking about short term goals before each game. * What athletes struggled with most * Navigating hard conversations with their coaches * Pressure from parents to perform perfectly and get play time * Being okay with failure and using it as a starting place/way to learn. * What helped them thrive * Incorporating play, no pressure playtime that is another sport, games with the family or friend time. * Making sure that they have other hobbies, interests and are not defined by their sport or the title of athlete. * Giving them autonomy and space to figure things out for themselves. * Trusting when the coach asks them to step out of their comfort zone to try something new and hard. * What I’ve learned about supporting my athlete * Sports and teen athletes would be better off if parents would back off and let their kids play their sport, navigate the ups and downs on their own as long as there isn’t anything abusive going on and be allowed to keep the purity of the sport and fun. * Don’t chirp from the stands. Yell encouragements not coaching and keep in mind that the score keepers in club volleyball and maybe other club sports are kids! Factor in mess-ups from the score table and keep your composure, be a model for your athlete. Your behavior effects them and their future in sports (coaches/scouts are watching).Your kids might tune you out when you yell things for them to fix but they notice your behavior. * Taking the fun out of sports burns them out faster than anything else. If you want your kids to love their sport and thrive in their sport past the age of 13, find ways to not be a fun sucker. Let them play! * Let the athlete initiate the car conversation after their games.    The Reset: How to Close Out the Year Well * A simple reflection ritual for parents + athletes between the seasons (summer). This ritual isn’t about fixing, evaluating, or strategizing. It’s about honoring what was, clearing space, and letting summer be a reset — not another grind.   🌿 The “Pause, Pull Forward, Release” Ritual A 20‑minute end‑of‑year reset for parents & athletes This ritual honors the idea that this moment is a bridge between reflection and preparation, not a rushing point into the next thing. Step 1: Pause (5 minutes Purpose: Create emotional space before evaluating anything. * Sit together somewhere neutral (kitchen table, living room, outside). * No phones, no coaching talk, no fixing. * Parent opens with a grounding line: “Before we talk about what’s next, I want to hear about what this season was like for you.” Guiding questions (athlete answers, parent listens): * What felt heavy this year? * What felt surprisingly good? * When did you feel most like yourself while playing? Parent’s role: Listen without correcting or reframing. This models the calm, steady presence that is central to this transition season. Step 2: Pull Forward (7–10 minutes) Purpose: Identify growth without tying it to stats or playing time. Each person answers these out loud: Athlete: * One thing I’m proud of from this year (not necessarily performance‑based) * One skill or strength I didn’t know I had * One moment that helped me grow, even if it was uncomfortable   Parent: * One thing I noticed you handling with more maturity * One way I saw you stay engaged or work through something hard * One thing I admire about how you showed up this year This connects the dots between engagement and meaning beyond outcomes. Step 3: Release (5 minutes) Purpose: Prevent carrying emotional clutter into summer. Ask together: * What am I ready to let go of from this season? * (Examples: mistakes, roles, drama, pressure, comparisons) Make it concrete: * Write each “let go” on a small piece of paper. * Tear it up or throw it away.   Parent reinforces: “This doesn’t erase the lesson — it just means we’re not dragging it into summer.” This mirrors your emphasis on letting go intentionally rather than rushing ahead in panic.   Step 4: Name the Summer Intention (2–3 minutes) Purpose: Set direction without pressure. Each person fills in this sentence: * “This summer, I want my relationship with my sport to feel like ___.” Examples: * Lighter * Curious * Strong * Fun again * Confident * Balanced No goals yet. No timelines. Just tone.   Step 5. Three things to consider for this summer… * How can you decompress physically and mentally * What to let go of from the season * What to carry forward   Your athlete doesn’t need perfection this summer — they need presence, purpose, and a plan that honors who they are becoming.

Beyond the Jersey: Developing Athletes (and Humans) with Melia Kane

Today’s guest is Melia Kane—known to many as “Coach Kane”—a local volleyball coach recognized for developing athletes on and off the court. With a coaching style rooted in fundamentals, confidence, and personal accountability, Melia helps players elevate their performance while also building the life skills that last far beyond the season. Parents and athletes alike appreciate her steady leadership and the way she emphasizes character, resilience, and team-first habits. This past club season, she coached my daughter and made a lasting impact—not just by helping the girls become better volleyball players, but by challenging them to become great humans.   Purpose * How can athletes discover identity beyond volleyball? * How do you as a coach and an academic advisor help people align their passion, skill and contribution? * What do you say to an athlete who feels lost when volleyball isn’t going well? Balance * Time management – This is a huge skill for young adults to learn to be successful in the future. What are your thoughts on this topic and what do you think the difference and connection is between time management and energy management is? Any golden nuggets you can share? * What are some burnout signals that you have seen in student athletes? * What do you think is a healthy way to do things versus “doing it all perfectly” * What do you think is one thing high school athletes misunderstand about college balance?   Play * Why does play matter for performance?   Positive Emotion * How do you help athletes bounce back emotionally after tough performances?   Academics * How have you helped athletes/students choose their major?   Personal * Are there any other little golden nuggets that you would like to leave our listeners with that we didn’t talk about today? Volleyball with Coach Melia [https://www.instagram.com/volleyballwithcoachmelia/]

Building a Life That Feels Good - Finding Your Sweet Spot - Jessie Brodmerkel

Week 4 Building a Life That Feels Good  What if life wasn’t just about winning but about wanting to keep going? Fous: Integration Core Idea: Success isn’t just performance-it’s sustainability. Talking Points: * Creating your own version of ikigai- instead of thinking about it as a destination, think about it as a daily alignment practice. * Your version of Ikigai isn’t one big answer – it’s built through small, consistent choices. * What gives you energy vs. drains you? * When do you feel most like yourself? * What moments make you lose track of time? * For athletes, this might look like: * Loving competition and loving being a great teammate * Valuing growth and enjoying the process * Caring about performance and relationships * It’s less about finding “the one thing” and more about stacking meaningful moments that create a life that feels good to live. * Simple weekly rhythm: * Compete – This is your edge. Practice, games, lifting, pushing limits. It’s where growth and discomfort live. But competition isn’t just physical- it’s showing up with focus and intention. * Connect – Relationships are often the first thing sacrificed, but they’re the glue. Teammates, family coaches, friends – connection builds resilience and perspective. * Recover – Not just physical recovery – mental and emotional too. Sleep, downtime, reflection, even boredom. Without this, burnout isn’t a risk – it’s a guarantee. * Play – The most underrated pillar. Unstructured, fun no-pressure movement or activity. This is where joy lives – and ironically, it often improves performance the most. The goal isn’t to be perfectly balance every day- it’s making sure your week reflects all four. Most athletes accidentally live in only one or two of these. Balance comes from intentionally hitting all four. Identity beyond sport: One of the biggest traps athletes fall into is identity foreclosure – when “athlete” becomes the only way they see themselves. When sport is your only identity: * Injuries feel like identity loss * Performance dictates self-worth * Transition (graduation, retirement) becomes overwhelming So the question becomes: Who are you when you’re not playing your sport? * Interests outside of sport (music, art, school subjects, hobbies) * Roles you play (friend, sibling, leader, student) * Values you hold (kindness, curiosity, discipline, humor) This doesn’t weaken performance – it strengthens it. Athletes with broader identities: * Handle pressure better * Bounce back faster * Enjoy sport more Because their whole self isn’t on the line every time they compete. * Long-term athlete development (and life development) Model emphasizes building athletes over time: * Fundamentals before specialization * Skill development before outcome-obsession * Health and longevity over early success * Confidence > trophies * Character> Stats * Consistency > intensity Questions to ask: * Will this help them love the sport in 5 years? * Are we developing decision makers or just performers? * Are we building a human…or just an athlete? Because the goal isn’t just better athletes – it’s better people who happen to be athletes.   Action Step: Build a Balanced Week Blueprint: This isn’t rigid – it’s a framework you can adapt.   Example: Monday * Compete: Practice/training * Connect: Team check-in, dinner with family Tuesday * Compete: Strength + Skill work * Recover: Stretch, Early bedtime Wednesday * Play: Pickup game, different sport for fun movement or spend time outside * Connect: Hang out with friends Thursday * Compete: High-Intensity practice * Recover: Light mobility, journaling Friday * Compete: Game Day * Connect: Team Bonding after game Saturday * Recover: Sleep in, light movement (walk or yoga) * Play: Something fun, no pressure Sunday * Recover: Reset, reflect, plan * Connect: Family Time * Light Play: Something creative or relaxing This is what building a life that feels good looks like in practice. Not perfect, not optimized to the minute, but intentional, balanced and sustainable. Linktree [https://linktr.ee/jessiebrodmerkel]