1: The Psychology of Shame: How Internalized Shame Shapes Your Identity | Dr. Delvena Thomas
Shame doesn’t start with you. It’s learned, internalized, and carried until you decide to confront it.
In this premiere episode of Who’s Your Ma Honey?, hosts Teri Williams and Suzan McDowell sit down with Board-Certified Psychiatrist Dr. Delvena Thomas to unpack the psychology of shame and how it silently shapes identity, confidence, and success.
Teri shares the moment she realized she buried her roots to fit into elite spaces, disconnecting from the very woman who shaped her greatness. Suzan opens up about navigating identity, belonging, and the tension of growing up between polarizing cultures. Together, they reveal how external judgment becomes internal truth and how that truth can be rewritten.
Tune in to find out how shame is formed, why we disconnect from our origins to survive, and what it really takes to reframe your story. This episode is a masterclass in self-awareness, healing, and reclaiming your power.
If you’ve ever felt like you had to hide parts of yourself to belong, this conversation will change how you see your story.
KEY POINTS:
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0:00 - Introduction
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2:38 – Burying your roots to succeed: how Teri erased Indiantown and Miss Honey from her Ivy League success story
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7:48 – Internalized trauma & self-stigma: why we disconnect from our background to survive elite, white-dominant spaces
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16:18 – How shame is imposed: subtle microaggressions and dismissal that signal “you don’t belong here”
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25:12 – Undeserved shame exposed: institutions reward you for disconnecting from your roots, community, and history
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30:41 – Suzan’s immigration shock: taken from Jamaica to Texas and forced into cultural displacement and poverty
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32:03 – Split identity as a superpower: being both Jamaican and American becomes Suzan’s advantage in South Florida
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49:20 – From trauma to resilience: reframing, “Brain Love,” and turning shame into your superpower
QUOTES:
“There could be some things about you and in our roots that we bury to try to fit into this integrated world. We went from segregation to integration.” - Teri Williams
“I felt so ashamed of being this… dark skinned, ashy Jamaican… not fitting in girl in the middle of Texas.” – Suzan McDowell
“We do this subconscious thing where we disconnect from our roots because this is our way of surviving.” - Dr. Delvena Thomas
GUEST RESOURCES:
Dr. Delvena Thomas
Website | www.drdelvenahelp.com [https://www.drdelvenahelp.com/her-story]
Instagram | @drdelvena [https://www.instagram.com/drdelvena/]
RESOURCES:
Teri Williams
Website: @teri-williams [https://www.oneunited.com/about-us/our-leadership/teri-williams/]
Suzan McDowell LinkedIn: @suzan-mcdowell [https://www.linkedin.com/in/suzan-mcdowell-01a4574]
Who's Your Ma' Honey? is produced by EPYC Media Network [https://www.epyc.co/]