118. Keepsakes After Infertility | Letting Go Isn't All or Nothing

118. Keepsakes After Infertility | Letting Go Isn't All or Nothing

Host Elizabeth Tiglao-Guss shares a long-held tradition with Victor during their season of trying and waiting for a baby: collecting small, meaningful travel souvenirs intended for a future nursery, including a stuffed St. Bernard from Switzerland, a giraffe door stopper from Kenya, a stork from a French market, and a dolphin wind chime from the Maldives. She explains she still keeps these items because they now represent nostalgia and who they were—two hopeful people exploring the world—rather than only loss. She contrasts this with letting go of clothes and toys bought for two failed adoptions (one boy, one girl), a healing ritual guided by therapy. She encourages listeners to move beyond one-size-fits-all rules about discarding reminders and instead ask, “What does this mean to me right now?” to decide what to keep or release as grief evolves. * A Waiting Tradition * Souvenirs For The Nursery * Nostalgia Not Sadness * Advice To Let Go * The Healing Ritual * Not One Size Fits All * Meaning Changes Over Time * The Question To Ask * Choosing What Stays * Closing Encouragement Connect with Elizabeth: IG: @bychanceavenue [https://instagram.com/bychanceavenue/] Stay connected & up to date with all things By Chance [https://bychance.myflodesk.com/emailsignup] Want to share your story? Apply to be a guest! [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1RWGRzGCeggUdsVdwAM7-b7kLZpjMVNkrHhx2NEPtkPk/edit]

117. Grief From an Image of What Could Have Been | He's 5 Now

Host Elizabeth Tiglao-Guss shares how an “On This Day” phone memory resurfaced photos and videos from five years ago of the six-month-old baby she and Victor were supposed to adopt, noting it may be triggering. Seeing the baby’s face sparked tenderness and curiosity about how he is now, but a photo of Victor laughing while holding him hit hardest, highlighting what Victor lost and her desire to have seen him as a dad. After exchanging brief texts and getting Victor’s consent to post a back-view image, Victor later admitted the post made him emotional. Elizabeth reflects that life is good now, yet grief can appear unexpectedly and doesn’t move in a straight line; healing doesn’t mean grief stops, but that you can feel it without being consumed, and being caught off guard doesn’t mean you’re back at square one. * On This Day Memory * Photos That Stayed * Victor Holding Him * Sharing The Post * Healing With Grief * Feeling Neutral Now * Closing Thoughts Connect with Elizabeth: IG: @bychanceavenue [https://instagram.com/bychanceavenue/] Stay connected & up to date with all things By Chance [https://bychance.myflodesk.com/emailsignup] Want to share your story? Apply to be a guest! [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1RWGRzGCeggUdsVdwAM7-b7kLZpjMVNkrHhx2NEPtkPk/edit]

116. The Value of Friendships When You Don't Have Children

Host Elizabeth Tiglao-Guss reflects on a week that contrasted her prior discussion of the “messy middle,” sharing how her heart felt unexpectedly full through layered moments of connection. A lifelong best friend visited and they spent time eating, beachgoing, laughing, and enjoying K-pop and K-dramas; another close friend came for a soul-filling night of conversation. She hosted a brunch where three friends from different chapters of her life met and bonded, followed by a mahjong gathering at her home that left her grateful and surprised by how social and supported she feels. She emphasizes that meaningful friendships are built with intention, time, and courage, offering hope to those feeling lonely. She also shares being a Midi Health ambassador and joining a brand photo shoot with six other women, leaving inspired by the community and mission around menopause care and being heard. * From Messy to Joy * Brunch Nerves Payoff * Mahjong and Social Season * How Friendships Grow * Midi Health Backstory * Ambassador Photoshoot Week * Joy After Hard Seasons * Closing Thanks Check out MIDI health http://bit.ly/3QHmKZ0 [http://bit.ly/3QHmKZ0] Connect with Elizabeth: IG: @bychanceavenue [https://instagram.com/bychanceavenue/] Stay connected & up to date with all things By Chance [https://bychance.myflodesk.com/emailsignup] Want to share your story? Apply to be a guest! [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1RWGRzGCeggUdsVdwAM7-b7kLZpjMVNkrHhx2NEPtkPk/edit]

115. The Messy Middle Can Feel Lonely | But You're Not Alone In It

Host Elizabeth Tiglao-Guss reflects on living in a “messy middle” where her life feels both joyful and heavy: she’s making new friends, enjoying a new hobby, and feeling excited about projects, while also processing difficult new news about her dad’s health after last year’s serious health scare and caregiving season. She shares how being the only one in her large Filipino family without children has led her to place extra responsibility on herself—feeling she must be more available, justify her existence, and preempt potential judgment—despite knowing childfree people don’t inherently have more bandwidth. She wrestles with guilt about honoring grief while continuing to build her life, and concludes that two truths can coexist. She encourages listeners, especially those without kids, to name and acknowledge this self-imposed load as a first step to change. * Living in Contradiction * Dad’s Health Update * The Messy Middle * Carrying Extra Weight * Love vs Self Growth * Two Truths Can Coexist * If You’re Childfree Too * Closing Thoughts Connect with Elizabeth: IG: @bychanceavenue [https://instagram.com/bychanceavenue/] Stay connected & up to date with all things By Chance [https://bychance.myflodesk.com/emailsignup] Want to share your story? Apply to be a guest! [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1RWGRzGCeggUdsVdwAM7-b7kLZpjMVNkrHhx2NEPtkPk/edit]

114. It Was Enough | A Full Circle Moment in the Desert

Host Elizabeth Tiglao-Guss shares the fuller context behind an Instagram video about returning to Joshua Tree for her 13th wedding anniversary with Victor, contrasting it with a trip nearly three years earlier when they went to the desert to decide whether to renew their adoption home study and continue a decade-long infertility journey. On that earlier trip, amid emotional weight and a storm, they had a vulnerable conversation and chose to end the process, with Elizabeth fearing Victor might later regret the decision. Revisiting the same desert recently, she notices a new sense of peace, contentment, and joy alongside ongoing sadness, and emphasizes that this inward peace comes from her own grieving and healing work, not from having a partner, offering hope to listeners wherever they are in their journey. * Why Share Again * Anniversary Desert Trip * The Hard Joshua Tree Decision * Storm and Final Conversation * Returning With Peace * Peace Comes From Within * Closing Reflections and Hope Connect with Elizabeth: IG: @bychanceavenue [https://instagram.com/bychanceavenue/] Stay connected & up to date with all things By Chance [https://bychance.myflodesk.com/emailsignup] Want to share your story? Apply to be a guest! [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1RWGRzGCeggUdsVdwAM7-b7kLZpjMVNkrHhx2NEPtkPk/edit]