Childish or Disobedient? How to Tell the Difference and Train Ahead for Both

Descripción

What if the work you're doing right now, the patient, repetitive, invisible work of training your children, is already taking root in ways you can't see yet? On today’s episode, Rhonda and Melissa open with Deuteronomy 6:7 and build out one of the most practical episodes yet: a full conversation on training ahead at every stage, toddlers, elementary, and teenagers, and how the small, consistent investments you make now shape who your children become. Rhonda shares the moment she watched her two-year-old son quietly grab a towel and clean up his own spill at a friend's house without saying a word to anyone, the result of training ahead that started in the high chair. She also walks through how to tell the difference between childish behavior and actual disobedience, the Play-Doh lesson that teaches responsibility and creativity at the same time, and how she prepared her teenage son for a formal banquet by asking questions instead of giving answers. You'll walk away with practical tools for every age and renewed faith that the work is worth it. Topics Covered in This Episode * Deuteronomy 6:7: what it looks like to teach diligently in the rhythms of everyday life * Morning routines that establish calm instead of chaos, and what to do with kids who are slow to wake * Using car rides, mealtimes, and bedtime as natural opportunities to point kids toward Christ * The power of sitting quietly in the dark -Melissa's mother-in-law's bedtime ritual * How to break generational patterns and parent differently than you were parented * The prayer journal that moved Rhonda to copy down a stranger's prayers for her own family * Warning: parenting for the accolades of others and how to recognize when you're doing it * Praising character qualities over appearance: what 1 Samuel 16:7 has to do with your daughter's self-image * Childish vs. disobedient: how to tell the difference and why it matters for how you respond * Training ahead in the high chair: food, plates, and teaching respect for property from the very beginning * The Play-Doh method: introducing new freedoms with clear expectations and a cleanup plan * The two-year-old spill story: the payoff of training ahead you may not see coming * Training ahead for teenagers: the pool story, the prom story, and how to have the conversation before the moment * Amelia on the boat, and what a three-year-old's response revealed about years of consistent training * The goal isn't perfection: it's progress Key Scripture Deuteronomy 6:7 "You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise." 1 Samuel 16:7 (referenced) "Man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart." Episode Takeaways 1. Look at your morning and find one intentional moment. It doesn't have to be a formal devotion. A hug, a short prayer, a verse at breakfast, one moment where you're deliberately pointing your kids toward Christ before the rush takes over. 1. Identify one behavior you've been overlooking and train for it ahead of time. Choose a calm, neutral moment, no conflict, no friction, and walk your child through what you expect the next time that situation comes up. Role-play it if they're young enough. Ask questions instead of giving answers if they're a teenager. 1. Check your praise this week. How often do you comment on your child's appearance rather than their character? Find one specific quality, patience, kindness, creativity, perseverance, and name it out loud to your child before the week is out. Resources + Links Was this episode helpful? Share it with a mom who's in the trenches of training right now and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. Every review helps more families find this show.

A Generous Tongue: How Specific Words of Encouragement Can Change the Atmosphere of Your Home

What if the most generous thing you could give someone today cost nothing at all? In today’s episode of Cultivating a Home, Rhonda and Melissa wrap up their two-part conversation on generosity by going beyond money and talents to two things most people never think to give intentionally: their time and their words. Rhonda shares what it looked like to show up at the home of a grieving family with her children, a Sam's Club cart full of supplies, and no idea how they would get everything inside without making it about themselves. She talks about the difference between saying "let me know if you need anything" and actually showing up, and why being present without having answers is sometimes the most powerful gift you can offer. Then the conversation shifts to the tongue. Rhonda introduces a phrase she has used in her home for years: " When you think something nice, say it.” She shares the moment her son told a waitress she had excellent people skills, and how that one specific, genuine observation brought the woman to tears. The episode closes with the special plate tradition, a simple practice any family can start today to build a home where people speak life into each other. Topics Covered in This Episode * What it means to give your time as an act of generosity * Looking for opportunities in the everyday places you already are: sports fields, ballet recitals, neighborhoods * The difference between "let me know if you need anything" and actually showing up with something specific * Texting instead of calling when someone is grieving, and why it works better * The Sam's Club run: showing up at a grieving family's home with a car full of supplies and no plan * The Art of Helping by Lauren Whitlow Briggs [https://www.amazon.com/Art-Helping-What-Someone-Hurting/dp/1589191668] and the do's and don'ts of helping in hard situations * Karen's question about the garden tub: how to make a specific offer that is easy to say yes to * Learning to let people help you: the pride and the blessing on the other side of receiving * A generous tongue: why specific compliments land differently than general ones * When you think something nice, say it. Teaching this as a habit at home before asking kids to do it in public * The waitress story: what one elementary-aged boy noticed and said out loud * Speaking life into people without flattery: the difference between genuine observation and empty words * The special plate tradition: how to honor a family member with specific, real words * How to include toddlers in the special plate even before they can form full sentences * It is never too late to start. Start where you are today. Key Scripture Proverbs 22:9 (continued from Episode 8) "He who has a generous eye will be blessed, for he gives of his bread to the poor." The Special Plate Tradition The special plate is a red plate that says "You Are Special." One person is honored at a time. Everyone at the table goes around and shares something specific about that person: a character quality, a skill, a real story. Not flattery. Real, observed, genuine words. How to start even if your kids are little: Whisper the words to them line by line and let them repeat. "You are special. Because you are my dad. I like it when you make pancakes with me." They are learning the rhythm long before they can do it on their own. You do not need the plate. If you are on vacation or away from home, the concept travels. Pull chairs in a circle and do it anyway. Episode Takeaways 1. [0:00:26] Expanding the Generosity Series to Time 2. [0:01:49] Training Children to See Needs and Serve 3. [0:05:02] Ministry of Presence in Times of Suffering 4. [0:09:56] Practicing Practical, Specific Help in Crisis 5. [0:17:45] Learning to Receive Help and Let Others Bless You 6. [0:21:47] Cultivating a Generous Tongue and Family Honor Traditions Resources + Links Book Referenced – Art of Helping by Lauren Whitlow Briggs [https://www.amazon.com/Art-Helping-What-Someone-Hurting/dp/1589191668] https://www.amazon.com/Art-Helping-What-Someone-Hurting/dp/1589191668 [https://www.amazon.com/Art-Helping-What-Someone-Hurting/dp/1589191668] Let’s Keep The Conversation Going! * New episodes release every Thursday. Be sure to follow, rate, and subscribe so you don’t miss what’s coming next. Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis [https://www.instagram.com/therhondaellis] * Facebook - https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis [https://www.facebook.com/TheRhondaEllis] * Visit us at: http://cultivatingahome.com [http://cultivatingahome.com] Did this episode help you? Share it with a friend who's drowning in clutter or noise — and leave a review on Apple Podcasts. It means everything to a new show.

28 de may de 202631 min

Childish or Disobedient? How to Tell the Difference and Train Ahead for Both

Descripción

Comentarios

Empieza 7 días de prueba

Todos los episodios