Before Dinner Window Sibling Squabbles

Before Dinner Window Sibling Squabbles

I love teaching authoritative parenting. Above is a very real response from a dad to my lesson on the handling window between getting home from school/work and dinnertime. Watch the lesson on after school meltdowns this question came from: https://apsg.drphilboucher.com/apsg-demo-22 [https://apsg.drphilboucher.com/apsg-demo-22] Authoritative parenting is both high in warmth and high in boundaries. It has by far the best research on short-term outcomes, such as getting through difficult day-to-day moments and seasons, as well as long-term outcomes related to our children’s development and our relationship with them as they grow. Authoritative parenting is not as easy as authoritarian and permissive parenting. Authoritarian and permissive parenting are really based on avoiding discomfort. In authoritarian parenting, you use your big voice and threats and coercion and guilt and shame to get compliance. In doing so, parents try to avoid the discomfort that we face when our children don’t do as they prefer immediately. It is high in demands and low in warmth/connection. In permissive parenting, warmth is present, but limits and boundaries are lacking. Permissive parenting is a response aimed at avoiding the discomfort the child might face if a parent sets a boundary or expectation. It is high in warmth but low in boundaries and limits. Authoritative parenting, by contrast, takes the good side of both…. it is high in warmth and connection and also high in boundaries and expectations. Read more about authoritative parenting: https://dearparents.substack.com/t/authoritative [https://dearparents.substack.com/t/authoritative-parenting] This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit dearparents.substack.com/subscribe [https://dearparents.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2]

AMA Toddler Sleep Regression/Anxiety

This is a free preview of a paid episode. To hear more, visit dearparents.substack.com [https://dearparents.substack.com?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_7] Your Toddler’s Sleep Didn’t Break. She’s Just Missing You. Read/watch/listen to the full post https://dearparents.substack.com [https://dearparents.substack.com] Ask your question: https://drphilboucher.com/ask [https://drphilboucher.com/ask] This week’s episode is an Ask Me Anything from a mom named Emily, and it’s one so many of you are living right now: Hi, Phil. My name is Emily, and our daughter Remy turns three in about three weeks, and recently has really regressed with her sleeping over the last two weeks. Particularly at nighttime, she lays in her bed until we leave, and then immediately goes to the door and screams for about an hour, bangs on the door crying, hits her toys against the door, and it just really goes on from there. It’s also happening at nap time at home, even though she’s napping great at daycare. I think it’s some sort of separation anxiety. Not entirely sure what triggered it. We did start swim lessons a couple weeks ago that she had a lot of separation anxiety with, but she’s gotten a lot better. Her daycare class has also been a lot more chaotic than usual, and we notice that when things are a little up and down at school, she tends to regress. So just curious if this is a phase. We’ve been letting her cry it out. We did try laying in there till she fell asleep. Within the minute she woke up and realized we weren’t there, pattern starts all over again. Tried leaving the door open with a barrier to say, “Hey, stay in there.” But that didn’t work. She kept coming out and then wanted us to sleep in there with her. So right now we’re just kinda letting her scream. And we have an infant at home that can wake up when she does scream. So anyway, just curious what you think. It’s happening at night and at nap time when we’re at home. And really don’t wanna get into a co-sleeping situation, ‘cause the last time we brought her into our big bed when she regressed, it was really hard to break her of that. She usually loves her bed and sleeps really great. So curious what you think. Thanks. My response: First, the co-sleeping trap is real, and you can avoid it This is one of the most common issues parents bring to me, and it very often leads to co-sleeping, because we’re all exhausted, there’s a new baby at home, and it’s so easy to fall into “just get in bed with me,” or to not even realize they climbed in because you were too tired to notice. Avoiding co-sleeping is possible. It just takes some intentionality. We have six kids and never fell into it Emily clearly wants a peaceful bedtime and an end to the nightly door battle, and we can get her both. This is not a melatonin problem Before we go further: a lot of well-meaning friends will hear this and say, “Oh, just give her some melatonin.” Please don’t. This is not a melatonin deficiency. This is a habit, separation anxiety, and busyness-of-life situation that we fix with new practices, not with something that chemically knocks a kid out. Melatonin might work temporarily, but it won’t fix the real issue. And I don’t love putting young kids on it for any stretch of time. Remember, melatonin is a hormone, not a vitamin. It has effects all over the body, and when it isn’t indicated, I’d much rather skip it. The big picture: this is separation anxiety, not broken sleep I honestly don’t even think of this as a “sleep regression.” People talk about regressions like a child hits a magic age and their sleep just detonates. There are windows where it’s more common, sure. You’ve heard about the four-month one, the eight-month, the nine-month. It’s tough to keep them straight because you can find a blog post about the 6.4-month regression if you look hard enough. It just happens across babyhood and toddlerhood. Here’s what tells me this is typical separation anxiety specifically:

T1D Deep Dive

Most kids with type 1 diabetes are diagnosed in crisis: thirsty, exhausted, losing weight…they end up in the hospital and often the ICU. In this deep dive, I make the case that it no longer has to start that way. Type 1 is an autoimmune condition that shows up in the blood years before the first symptom, and we finally have the science to catch it early. What you’ll take away: * Why type 1 is an immune system problem, not a blood sugar problem, and why a normal finger-stick can falsely reassure * The old rule that misses most kids: 90% of those diagnosed have no family history * The three stages, and why stage three (the ER, the DKA) is the end of a process that began years earlier * The new JAMA study (Winkler et al., May 2026 [https://jamanetwork.com/journals/jama/article-abstract/2849402]): 200,000 kids screened at well checks, DKA at diagnosis dropping from 40 to 60% down under 10% * When to screen, what the antibody panel involves, and why knowing early lowers anxiety rather than raising it Screening at Frontier Pediatrics: We are now offering this screening even if your child isn’t our patient! These are virtual visits and we don’t need to see the kid(s), just parent! We can do one visit and order screening for all the kids. Available as a virtual visit in Nebraska, Iowa, Kansas, Illinois, Texas, and Florida. Most insurance plans cover the testing and we can also help find low-cost or free alternatives like the research sites. Click here to learn more and book. [https://clinics.frontierpediatric.care/t1d] This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit dearparents.substack.com/subscribe [https://dearparents.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2]

AMA: Dysregulated + Aggressive 6 year old

Have a question? Ask yours here https://drphilboucher.com/ask [https://drphilboucher.com/ask] Curious about my ADHD Compass? Find out where your child falls across all 4 domains of ADHD (hyperactivity, inattention, emotional regulation, executive function) and get a custom-tailored report based on their age, stage, and current strengths & challenges ($19) https://drphilboucher.com/adhdcompass [https://drphilboucher.com/adhdcompass] This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit dearparents.substack.com/subscribe [https://dearparents.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2]

Keeping Kids Hydrated with Cure Founder, Lauren Picasso

This week I’m talking with Lauren Picasso, founder and CEO of Cure Hydration, about something that comes up constantly in my practice: how do I actually keep my kid hydrated? We get into when water alone isn’t always enough, how oral rehydration solution works (the WHO formula that’s been around over 50 years), and why kids dehydrate faster than adults... smaller bodies, developing kidneys, and the toddler who can’t tell you they’re thirsty until they’re already behind. We also cover: * The difference between rehydrating and just loading up on sugar (some sports drinks pack nearly 40g per serving) * When to reach for electrolytes instead of plain water: fever, vomiting, diarrhea, heat, sports, and even air travel * Why I keep these packets in the parent kits we hand out * What Cure built specifically for kids * Hydration in pregnancy, including Lauren’s take! If you’ve ever stood in the pharmacy aisle at 2am with a vomiting kid, this one’s for you!! More at dearparents.substack.com [http://dearparents.substack.com/]Cure Hydration: www.curehydration.com [http://www.curehydration.com/] This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit dearparents.substack.com/subscribe [https://dearparents.substack.com/subscribe?utm_medium=podcast&utm_campaign=CTA_2]