Valerie - What Stayed: Season Two Reflections

Tennille - Pink Boxing Gloves

At 41, Tennille went from setting up surgical trays for breast cancer reconstruction to sitting on the other side of the operating table with a diagnosis of her own. After twenty-five years as a surgical technologist, she recognized the warning signs before anyone had to tell her. What followed was a whirlwind of scans, bloodwork, chemotherapy, radiation, multiple surgeries, and the long road of learning what it means to become the patient. In this conversation, Tennille shares what it was like to navigate a Stage IIB, HER2-positive breast cancer diagnosis as a single mother raising her nine-year-old daughter. She opens up about the parts of survivorship people rarely talk about: recovering between surgeries, delayed radiation burns, body image after mastectomy and reconstruction, chronic fatigue, joint pain, and the emotional weight of living in a body that no longer feels familiar. We also explore the role of faith in suffering, the courage it took to tell her daughter she had cancer, and how prayer, hope, and community carried her through the darkest moments. Today, Tennille mentors other women facing cancer, is writing the book she believes God gave her during her journey, and is turning one of the hardest seasons of her life into a source of encouragement for others. Whether you've faced cancer, another life-changing diagnosis, or simply walked through a season that changed you, this conversation is a reminder that healing isn't about pretending life goes back to the way it was. Sometimes healing is learning that your scars don't just tell the story of what happened—they tell the story of what you've survived. If this episode encouraged you, consider sharing it with someone who needs a little hope today. Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]

Suzette - They Need Love

Healing gets strange when the chaos finally stops and you start missing it. That’s where Valerie and Suzette go in this conversation, tracing recovery beyond “not drinking” and into the deeper work of emotional sobriety, shame, and the patterns that keep us braced for impact even when life is calm. Suzette is a U.S. Army Veteran, transformational leader, and Director of Development at Save A Warrior, where she helps expand access to healing for Veterans, Active Duty Military, Ohio First Responders, and their families. With more than twenty years of sobriety and decades spent mentoring women through recovery and personal transformation, she brings both lived experience and hard-earned wisdom to this conversation. We talk about the breaking point that burns everything down, then the surprisingly powerful basics that rebuild a life: structure, one day at a time, and staying close to people who tell the truth with care. From there, we explore Internal Family Systems (IFS) in plain language, the manager and firefighter parts, and how coping can shift from substances to control, workaholism, gossip, or rumination. Suzette and Valerie unpack the “inside drugstore”—the adrenaline, dopamine, and stress chemistry that can make drama feel normal—and why peace can feel uncomfortable when your nervous system is used to intensity. If you love someone struggling with addiction, are navigating recovery yourself, or simply find yourself repeating the same patterns despite your best intentions, this conversation offers insight into what may be happening beneath the surface. Together, they explore boundaries, shame, witnessing, and the freedom that comes from letting go of what cannot be controlled. They close with a grounding release practice and a simple reminder: when people are suffering, what they often need most is not fixing, advice, or solutions. They need love. Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]

Breanna - Moral Injury

The hardest part of trauma is not always what happened. Sometimes it's what it taught you to believe about yourself. In this episode, Valerie sits down with Breanna —a Navy veteran, suicide prevention specialist, and moral injury specialist with Volunteers of America—for a conversation about the wounds too many veterans carry in silence and the paths that can lead them home to themselves. We explore Military Sexual Trauma (MST) as a betrayal-based trauma and the layers that often accompany it: distrust, isolation, hypervigilance, shame, and a reshaped sense of identity. Breanna breaks down moral injury in a way that is both accessible and profound, offering a distinction that lands deeply: PTSD often says, "I'm not safe." Moral injury often says, "I'm not worthy." Together, we discuss the difference between treating symptoms and tending to the deeper wounds of meaning, values, and belonging. Breanna shares her own experience with suicidal ideation, the courage it took to call 988, and what she now looks for when someone begins to reconnect with themselves: choice, agency, hope, and a nervous system that finally exhales. We also talk about boundaries, self-care for helpers, movement, community, and why presence—not fixing—is often the most powerful medicine we can offer another human being. This is a conversation about healing, but also about witnessing. About telling the truth. About what becomes possible when we no longer carry our stories alone. If this episode resonates with you, consider sharing it with someone who may need it. And if you're enjoying these conversations, subscribing and leaving a review helps these stories reach the people who need them most. Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]

Valerie - What Stayed: Season Two Reflections

In this solo reflection, Valerie looks back on the conversations that shaped Season 2 and the themes that kept surfacing beneath the stories: grief, survival, caregiving, moral injury, nervous system healing, and the quiet weight so many people carry while appearing strong on the outside. Together, we explore the losses we were taught to outrun—safety, identity, relationships, expectations, and the versions of ourselves we created just to survive. We examine the helper patterns our culture rewards and what happens when the body finally sends an invoice through insomnia, panic, chronic pain, exhaustion, numbness, or disconnection. Drawing from conversations from this season's guests, Valerie reflects on the power of being believed, why healing rarely happens in isolation, and what it means to stop abandoning ourselves long enough to tell the truth. This episode is also a bridge into Season 3, where the focus widens beyond trauma itself and into the humanity beneath the roles we play—the field of human stories all around us.  Special thank you our special guest from this season - it means so much that you would share your hearts with us and help us grow in love and community. If this space has meant something to you, thank you for being part of it. Thank you for witnessing these stories, and for helping defy the silence that keeps people isolated and alone.  See you in Season 3 - The Field of Human Stories Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]

Kim - When Healers Need Healing

People trained to save everyone else rarely get asked a simple question: Where do you put your own pain? In this season finale, Valerie sits down with Kim —known to many as Captain Kim—a U.S. Army Veteran, former combat medic and emergency room nurse, and founder of the Reveille & Retreat Project. Kim’s path to leadership wasn’t linear. It was shaped by childhood adversity, military service, years on the front lines of trauma care, and raising a child as a single mother. Like so many who live in constant readiness, she learned how to function, perform, and push through—until her body no longer allowed it. When foot surgery forced her to slow down, everything she had outrun caught up. Memories from the ER. Nightmares. Survival patterns that no longer worked. In this conversation, we talk honestly about what happens when a life built on resilience meets the reality of unresolved trauma. From childhood experiences like divorce and lack of emotional attunement, to the way blame turns inward when we’re trying to make sense of it all—Kim shares what it looked like to move from living in fight-or-flight to something steadier and more sustainable. You’ll hear real, practical tools for nervous system regulation—and what it actually takes to move beyond white-knuckling your way through life. We also go deeper into Kim’s work today. Through the Reveille & Retreat Project, she creates healing retreats where military women can step out of performance and into truth—using nature, movement, and shared storytelling as pathways back to connection. She shares what makes a space truly safe, why the outdoors can support trauma healing, and how community only works when it includes boundaries and the right people. Kim is also the co-founder and host of the Dog Tag Diaries, where women veterans have honest conversations about service, identity, moral injury, grief, and life beyond the uniform. Because the stories we once survived… often become the ones that help others heal. Listen to Dog Tag Diaries here - https://dogtagdiaries.captivate.fm/ [https://dogtagdiaries.captivate.fm/] Contact Valerie [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/fan_mail/new] Support the show [https://www.buzzsprout.com/2531558/support] Remember YOU are loved and worthy of being witnessed! If today’s episode stirred heavy feelings, you are not alone. Please reach out to a trusted friend or a professional if you need support: * National Sexual Assault Hotline: 1-800-656-HOPE (4673) | rainn.org [https://www.rainn.org/] * SAMHSA Mental Health/Substance Use: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) * 988 LIFELINE: Call, Text or Chat https://988lifeline.org [https://988lifeline.org] * Veterans Crisis Line: Dial or text 988, then press 1 * Help for Veterans suffering with CPTSD https://saveawarrior.org/ [https://saveawarrior.org/] * https://www.scarsfoundation.org/ [https://www.scarsfoundation.org/] *This podcast is not therapy. If you’re in immediate danger, please call 911 or your local emergency number. Want to tell your story? Send a DM or an email Find us on IG @defiance_of_silence_podcast    valerie@defianceofsilencepodcast.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr [https://www.instagram.com/defiance_of_silence_podcast?igsh=MWVxMHI3OXY1cm1paA%3D%3D&utm_source=qr]