Was This My Life… Or Everyone Else’s?

Was This My Life… Or Everyone Else’s?

Have you ever looked at your life — when everything seems fine — and wondered… Was this really my choice… or everyone else’s? A conversation about regret, expectations, relationships, and the quiet realization that some choices may not have been entirely yours. In this episode, I talk about a quieter kind of regret... The kind that builds slowly — through expectations, compromises, relationships, family pressure, and choices that made sense at the time… but maybe weren’t entirely yours. And how, somewhere along the way, many of us stopped hearing our own voice underneath everyone else’s. If you’ve ever replayed your life in your head… this one will hit.

The Bigger the Love Story… The Worse the Marriage?

We grew up watching two completely different models of marriage traditional and love-based. One seemed stable but predictable, the other exciting but often unsustainable. So what happens when we try to choose for ourselves… without really understanding what works? In this episode, I unpack the confusion around modern relationships in the Middle East—from chemistry vs compatibility, to being chosen vs choosing, to why communication feels so difficult, and how cultural dynamics impact everything. And I ask a question I’m still figuring out myself: Is love enough… or is something else missing?

Why the “Let Them Theory” Doesn’t Always Work

The “Let Them” theory is everywhere right now. Let them ignore you. Let them disappoint you. Let them show you who they are. The idea is simple: stop reacting to other people’s behavior and detach. But what happens when “letting them” slowly turns into letting everyone walk all over you? In this episode of Don’t Call Me a Khawaga, Heba Shunbo reflects on the difference between emotional maturity and people-pleasing — and how avoiding conflict can quietly erode your self-respect over time. Through a surprising disagreement with her nanny, Heba explores: * how heartbreak can reshape the way we handle relationships * why boundaries often get blurred in Middle Eastern social circles * the cultural pressure to tolerate everything in order to keep the peace * and why sometimes the most mature response isn’t “let them” — it’s setting a boundary. This episode is about identity, relationships, cultural expectations, and the moment you realize you’ve been too accommodating for too long. @therapyjeff

I Thought My Kids Had a Holiday. They Didn’t.

What starts as a simple mistake—forgetting your kids’ school day—turns into something much bigger. In this episode, I share the story of the morning I thought it was a holiday… and walked straight into full school drop-off chaos. It was embarrassing. It was funny. It was a complete disaster. But it also revealed something deeper. Because for so many of us—especially women—we’ve slowly become the “responsible one.” The planner. The fixer. The one who carries everything. And somewhere along the way… we lost touch with who we actually are when we’re not under pressure. This episode isn’t about forgetting school. It’s about remembering yourself. If you’ve ever felt: * Overwhelmed by responsibility * Like you're carrying more than you should * Or like you’ve slowly become someone you don’t fully recognize This one's for you.

Introvert… or Just Tired of Performing?

Have you ever walked into a room and felt like two completely different versions of yourself were fighting to show up? The loud one. The quiet one. The one who connects. And the one who’s already planning her exit. In this episode, Heba unpacks the real question behind introversion vs extroversion — and why for many Arab Gen X women, it’s not about personality… it’s about conditioning. From being “too much” after one drink, to being called “rude” for staying quiet, this episode explores the exhausting reality of adapting yourself in every room. Because maybe you’re not confused. Maybe you’re just tired of performing. This episode is for anyone who has ever felt: Too Western here. Too Arab there. Too much — or never quite enough.